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Will my future partner accept my past?

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |626 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Nov 22, 2024

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Asked by Anonymous - Nov 15, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

I am in a relationship with a guy since last 4 years I also have physical relation with him but our families are not supporting us so we are deciding to breakup because we both can't go against our families. So I am confused that whether my future partner will accept my past or not. I have only one body count but still I heard men saying that "no seal, no deal "..... So what does this mean that no one will accept my past?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand your concern, but in my opinion, if a man says something like "no seal, no deal," it is better to stay single forever than marry someone as crude as that. Having cleared that out, I assure you that all men are not like that. Your past is your past; if someone has a problem with that, it is theirs. But not every man will have an issue with body count, or even ask you to reveal it. Relationships are very common in today's day and age and that means everyone has a past. Do not put so much pressure on yourself with these thoughts.

Best Wishes.

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Mohit

Mohit Arora  |71 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Jan 06, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 04, 2024Hindi
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Hi, I am struck in a morally complicated situation right now. Kindly guide me . I'm a modern woman yet who believes in culture. I am 24years old female from South India. Currently arrange marriage alliance process is going on and it is almost about to be finalized if i say yes. I have had a 3 serious relationship s in my past and the last one i was physically involved because i believed we would end up together. Even our families were involved we were about to get engaged. everything went fine until one day we had a huge fight and later as a result he didn't want to continue it anymore. He broke it off. This happened 1.5 years back and I loved him too much that I wanted him to comeback. Deep down i know he was not right guy for me yet i wanted him. About 2 months back I had a sudden realisation that hit me very bad I realised I need to move on and mentally I was able to disconnect myself from him, not completely but yeah i did. Now in the current situation the guy who is my potential fiance, I want to be transparent with him but I am not sure how well he will take it as we barely know each other. I met him only twice. He seems interested to marry me. I do not want to ruin his trust or feelings. The problem is I am not sure if he is open minded enough to accept my past. I'm willing to put in my efforts to make things work in marriage and keep my past behind me. If I tell him about my past and he is not interested to proceed and reject us my family will be upset ( they liked this match cuz the guy was nice and decent, his family and everything was convenient to them). I am totally stressed out as my family is waiting for my response to proceed further. The guy doesn't seem to be very particular about anything. I don't know what to do and how to do it.
Ans: I totally understand your concern. My advise is not to get into arrange marriage in the first place. Because that's a very transactional relationship. Go out, meet more guys and then see if you find someone you love. You are too young to give into the pressure of arrange marriage. However if you still want to proceed, then whether you tell him or not doesn't really matter. It depends on his mindset and value system which i have no idea about and probably you too. So even if you don't tell him, it doesn't matter. If you want to be honest which is a good thing, then you embrace that uncertainty of his reaction to it.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1655 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 23, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 18, 2024Hindi
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I had a relationship he cheated on me he took my virginity it's 7year relationship. Then I had a second relationship he also cheated me he need only sex . I trusted him that's why I'm okay to do that thing and he gave me promise that he only marry me i trusted his sweet words but he cheated me . Later I heard that he's a playboy. I feel like I'm useless. I truly loved them but their intentions was other stuffs. I'm a person who trust very easily but now I'm not . Will I get a future partner? If he knows my story will he leave me ? I'm not that bad person they cheated me I'm not like that . If I love someone I'll do anything for them .
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Rather than just experimenting with your sexual life this way and attracting men who want just your body, why not focus on your strengths? When you base your self-esteem on how others treat you, you will always find yourself down and out and defeated.
Build character that hold you and your identity in a manner that you become a person that can overcome anything. For that, you need to stop throwing yourself at boys/men.
First discover yourself, build self-esteem that relies on your strengths and then venture into relationships so that heartbreaks are not so heavy but you understand it as part of growing up. Also, before indulging in sex, judge the situation and decide to go ahead only when you know that the person is safe for you and not someone who is using you. A real man will not USE you but will keep you safe and respect you as a woman.

All the best!

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |626 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 12, 2024Hindi
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I (30F) had been in some Relationships at different stages of my Life, which Failed due to different Reasons and I am not Virgin. After getting exhausted emotionally, I quit Dating, 2 years ago & I decided to settle down for an Arranged Marriage, as a last resort. Since the last 2 years, I have met many Eligible Bachelors who seemed to show genuine interest in me, at the initial stage. But at some point of time, all of them asked me about my Virginity & Body Count. I had always been Honest with all of them. And almost all of them Rejected me for this one Reason. Some of them straightaway told me that they couldn't Trust any Woman who's not Virgin. Some of them gave some other Trivial Reason to Reject me, though, I could intuitively guess the Real Reason for Rejection. And some of them, just Ghosted me, immediately. I had been feeling very Bad about getting Rejected, it felt as if I was being Punished for my Honesty. Now I have begun to Question myself, whether I really need to tell my Prospective Partner about my Past? Why should my Past matter to my Future Partner? Do I owe, my Future Partner, any explanation for the way I have lived my Life until now? Is it really Fair to Judge me only on the basis of my Virginity, rather than my entire being as a whole? Does my entire worth depend only upon my Virginity? Why do Men raise Questions about my Past, in the first place, while I never asked any of them about their Past, as I don't care about my Partner's Past? Why are Men so Insecure about Sexually Active Women, is their Male Ego so Fragile that they can't accept a Woman's Past? Do they have the Right to Ask a Woman about her Sexual History, in the first place? Do they really need to know about my Past? Do I really have any Obligation to be Honest with them & disclose about my Past, before Marriage itself? My Family members are advising me that it's not Wrong to say a few White Lies, for the sake of Marriage? Would it be Wise, on my part to follow their Advice & Lie to Arranged Marriage prospects that I am Virgin? Or else, in what other ways can I Answer, Questions about my Virginity, Body Count & Sexual History, raised by future prospects, such that I don't get Rejected?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand your frustration. You made some very valid points. You are absolutely right- no one has any business asking you about your virginity. And you are also correct that it does not define you at all. But the truth is, to some people, it matters more than it should. They are not entirely at fault alone; it is the whole society. Nevertheless, you are right. While it is your decision whether you want to lie or be honest, I would suggest telling the truth. Not for their sake; for yours. You should not have to live your married life always thinking "Would my past have mattered to him?" or wondering if things would have been different if you told him the truth. Moreover, being honest will set you free; maybe it comes with rejections, but at least you do not ever have to bear the weight of lies or feel guilty about deceiving someone. And most importantly, you won’t have to settle for someone who cares so much about such superficial things. Happy marriages cannot start with a lie.

We can't control what's important to whom, but we can respect them, even if we disagree. If you are not comfortable disclosing your body count or past, simply answer their question with yours- "Does that matter to you a lot?" If they say yes, you can reject him because your values don't align.

Hope this helps.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |626 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 11, 2025

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I was in a relationship of 10 years.We both are from different states.Doing group a job in own psc.I was waiting to get married with him.There was a problem on him side that his elder brother not married due to no govt job still.And he is preparing.but I m the eldest sister among my 4 siblings,All are Waiting my marriage,after that they will marry . I am 34 still waiting for him.He told me to wait for him since last 10years.Everything was fine. But now I knew that he is physically with another girl.We faught alot .He said sorry alot and he said there was no sex between that girl ,only hug,forehead kiss and lip kiss.But the other girl is saying many times we have done sex.So what should I believe.?he told it will not happened again,but I can't tolerate that how he could be with others.i told this matter to her elder married sister only on his family.We both from hindu family but the new girl is from muslim community.I told my bf to talk with my parents about marriage assurance as he this elder sister told that it's not possible to marriage now before the boy elder brother till not get married after such betrayed.His sister told me to give one chance to her brother.and told again await 2 to 3 year for marriage.so I said talk to my parents for assurance because they are always tensed due to me.my age already crossed the marriage time,and still I m refuse to get married with others.but his family talked with my parents,and directly told to wait for minimum 2years,and told also we don't have problem for marriage if his son will agree,but it was confused statement that for my family and for me also,if after 2 years his son will not agree,then what will happen to me,I already wasted my important time for him(about 10 years),also his family told to our family u should disturb each two years,What's the meaning of this,I couldn't understand this,and also told you both are from different state,after marriage how both will manage?I m not saying to left your job,but you should have to job in Bihar govt.and his family also told that after marriage u both will suffer due to long distance,try to understand reality.etc etc.After all conversation in phone call I tried to convince them in different way.But they put all this thing in the name reality.My parents also said all this problem to me ,but I managed then everything before.And they also think it's about my child happiness,they never discussed the problem once in front their family.We he came to this relationship,he knew everything,so why such statements are coming during assurance to my family.It was not felt like the are assuring,that looked like they are indirectly saying not to get married.I m confused after 10 years of relationship,he betrayed.Whats the chance after 2-3years,he will marry to me ,what will happen if he refused to get marry to me.My life already spoiled due to him.He is now not calling once after that day,it's being 1 month ,three days.What should I do?my age already gone to get finding a good match.A lot of good proposals came before,but I refused.I couldn't understand and tolerance all this thing happened to me.How he became so selfish,never thinking once about my family feelings.My parents also told to their family,we can do hidden court marriage or engagement but they told no it's not possible?What should I do?
Ans: Dear Anjana,
I totally understand your pain and your concern. Whether it went farther than what he claims does not matter; the fact that he was involved, physically or emotionally, with another woman makes it completely wrong on his part- there is no excuse for that. Coming to the waiting part- I would really suggest you reconsider waiting for him any longer. You have waited and in the meantime, he has been cheating on you. Plus, he is still not giving you any assurance. It’s best that you reconsider this relationship. You deserve much better. And even if it takes you some time to find someone else, it would be far better than living your life with a man who could not respect and love you enough to remain loyal or think about your feelings.


Please think about this before you make any decision. Hope this helps.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |626 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 07, 2025
Relationship
So I had breakup I dont know but things happen so drastically he has given commitment to me that he will marry me we was in a relationship for 5.5 years of relationship I was already married to him in my mind we was also physically involved he started his business in partnership of sandwichs I understand he was quite busy but he did not message me for 3 long days I used to remain confused about where he is and what he is doing I ask for clarity to him than he said that he cannot take it anymore and cannot handle me as He was not even messaging me he had ghost me I asked him if he like another girl but he said no the guy once was committed to me suddenly said he cannot take it he ended it and move on , I am in middle of Cat preparation everything just sucks that I lost my virginity too It attacks my confidence I feel my life had ended as because who will accept a girl with past in this "No seal No deal" era I am not a object or product I am a human being My boyfriend move on what I will do stck in there but will I ever endup in happy married life with such past, Can I share this past to anyone or keep it as a hidden secret with me only
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am very sorry you are going through such a tough time. First of all, this ‘no seal no deal’ is the brainchild of extremely insecure people. You should not have to worry about that. If, in the future, you start dating someone, and you decide to tell them about your past and they say something that indicates this mentality, you should reconsider the relationship. Your past is your past. Whatever happened between you and your ex was out of love. And it isn’t a flaw in you. Remember, you deserve as much happiness and love as any other person. Coming to whether you can ever share your past or not- that is entirely up to you. There is no hard and fast rule that you must tell your partner every single detail of your past relationship history. But I strongly suggest focusing on finding someone with whom you can share anything without fear of judgment.


In the end, I’d again like to remind you that the choice to disclose your past is on you. No one can pressure you to talk about it, or not sharing the same doesn’t make you guilty of anything. For now, please stop worrying about all these and focus on keeping yourself happy and moving forward. You deserve someone who will love you every day and for everything you are.
Hope this helps.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9570 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Career
Good Evening Sir Sir what option are available if I get a rank of 80000 in jee mains if I want to pursue my career in ECE, I mean what all NIT shall be offered to me
Ans: With a JEE Main All India Rank of 80,000, options for pursuing Electronics and Communication Engineering (ECE) at National Institutes of Technology (NITs) become quite limited due to the higher demand and lower cut-off ranks associated with this branch. The general category closing ranks for ECE at most top and mid-tier NITs are significantly lower, typically ranging from under 6,000 to about 45,000, as seen in NITs like Surathkal, Trichy, Warangal, and even extending to newer NITs. At your rank, direct admission to core ECE branches at the more established NITs is improbable through both JoSAA and regular CSAB special rounds. However, some hope remains with the newer or North East NITs and less preferred home state quotas, including institutes like NIT Puducherry, NIT Arunachal Pradesh, NIT Mizoram, NIT Nagaland, NIT Manipur, and potentially NIT Agartala, where ECE closing ranks have sometimes trended closer to or just above 80,000 in later rounds. Seats may open up in CSAB special rounds if withdrawals occur or if demand for ECE drops at remote campuses or in less competitive states. The counselling process (JoSAA followed by CSAB Special and NEUT rounds) encourages filling out as many choices as possible, as last-minute seat vacancies can favor higher ranks. Beyond NITs, several Government Funded Technical Institutes (GFTIs) are accessible at this rank and should be included in your options, as their ECE cut-offs frequently extend to this range.

The five most important factors to weigh include: placement statistics (generally robust for ECE, but better at older NITs), modern infrastructure (often still developing at newer/remote NITs), qualified faculty, national recognition of the degree, and academic-peer environment. While NITs assure foundational quality and degree value, the resources and campus life at newer NITs may differ from older peers.

Recommendation
With an 80,000 rank, focus your NIT applications on NIT Puducherry, NIT Mizoram, NIT Nagaland, NIT Manipur, NIT Arunachal Pradesh, and NIT Agartala in the CSAB/Special/NEUT rounds for ECE, while including GFTIs and non-core branches as backup. Also consider reputed private universities with strong ECE placement records to optimize your options, given guaranteed opportunities at older NITs for ECE will not be feasible at this rank. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9570 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 28, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir my son is interested in quantum computing. so should he choose NIT CALICUT engineering in physics or BITS Pilani dual degrees in Msc physics and he wants to choose mathematics and computing for BE. Or should he choose BITS ISU 2+2 CSE program. please give your valuable choice sir.
Ans: Based on the following inputs/information, please choose the most suitable option out of the 3 options: NIT Calicut’s B.Tech in Engineering Physics focuses on advanced physics with comprehensive grounding in quantum mechanics, classical and statistical mechanics, photonics, nanomaterials, and computational methods. The curriculum is research-oriented and encourages exploration in emerging fields like quantum computing, with opportunities to select electives in quantum physics and project work related to quantum technologies. Internships, industry exposure, and collaborations with national labs enhance learning, but direct placement opportunities are more oriented toward scientific research, academia, or R&D in high-tech engineering roles than to corporate quantum computing jobs. While the core develops strong analytical, programming, and holistic problem-solving capabilities, cutting-edge quantum research and computing exposure may depend on individual academic initiative or pursuing higher studies at top institutes in India or abroad.

BITS Pilani’s integrated M.Sc. Physics dual degree (often paired with a BE in Mathematics & Computing) offers a flexible interdisciplinary structure, allowing deeper specialization via minors like Quantum Information and Technologies and active student-faculty groups dedicated to quantum computing. The BITS curriculum emphasizes both theoretical foundations and computational skills critical for quantum computing, with the option for additional research projects, workshops, and electives directly tailored to quantum algorithms, machine learning, and simulation. Robust peer networks, industry partnerships, and a strong culture of innovation promote global exposure and career prospects, especially for those combining mathematics, computing, and physics. The vibrant campus community includes dedicated quantum computing initiatives, enabling ambitious students to build impressive research and project portfolios that are highly regarded for both advanced study and international placements.

The BITS ISU 2+2 CSE program, delivered in partnership with a foreign university, provides students two years at BITS (India) and two years abroad. It offers dual degrees, substantial international exposure, access to advanced facilities overseas, and stronger work visa/job prospects internationally. Students benefit from a global academic environment, gaining specialized skills in CSE while forming global networks. However, the program’s focus remains on broader computer science concepts; it may not provide direct, high-level quantum computing coursework unless supplemented with targeted electives or research at the partner university. Financially, it is more intensive but offers a unique bridge for those keen on studying and working abroad in software engineering, AI, or computational research. Critical downsides include higher costs, potential admission/credit transfer hurdles, and limited integration with specific quantum computing research tracks unless intentionally selected.

In terms of future prospects and industry demand, quantum computing remains interdisciplinary, requiring mastery of quantum physics, mathematics, programming, and algorithm design. National and global demand is rapidly growing in cryptography, finance, optimization, and material science, but the field is still specialized compared to broader CSE career paths.

Recommendation: Given your son’s clear interest in quantum computing, prioritize BITS Pilani’s dual degree in MSc Physics with BE Mathematics & Computing for its direct alignment with quantum algorithms, flexible curriculum, research groups dedicated to quantum computing, and global recognition. NIT Calicut Engineering Physics offers a rigorous foundational path, ideal for research or higher studies. The BITS ISU 2+2 CSE program is best if the primary goal shifts toward a global CSE career; for quantum computing, select this only if the partner university has substantial offerings in that field. This preference order aligns academic content, research access, and employability with the quantum computing goal. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9570 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 28, 2025Hindi
Career
Sir I have got 5831 sc category rank in jee advanced and 24491 sc category,379243 crl rank in jee mains . I got nothing in jossa councelling is there any other option which I can opt or should I take 2nd drop ..... And I have also financial problem... Sir please tell me what should I do
Ans: With an SC category rank of 24,491 in JEE Main (CRL 379,243) and 5,831 in JEE Advanced, your prospects for admission to NITs, IIITs, or GFTIs in sought-after branches via CSAB rounds are extremely slim. Recent CSAB cut-off data confirm that ECE, CSE, and core engineering seats in NITs, IIITs, and GFTIs for the SC category close far above your rank; for many NITs, last closing ranks for CSE/ECE are usually under 10,000 for SC, with special rounds only rarely extending beyond 14,000. Even least preferred or remote branches rarely open at your ranking bracket. Nonetheless, you might still secure a seat in newer or less competitive GFTIs, non-core branches, or interdisciplinary programs during CSAB Special Rounds if you participate and fill as many choices as possible. The CSAB official portal facilitates late seat filling and occasional vacancies from withdrawals, but expectations for top branches or premium campuses must be realistic. If engineering is your only focus, you can also consider private or state engineering colleges accepting JEE scores, some of which offer scholarships and flexible fee payment options tailored for financial constraints. Pay close attention to daily CSAB notifications and use their predictor tools to estimate potential allotments in your bracket.

Recommendation: Participate fully in CSAB Special Rounds by registering and filling all eligible options to maximize your chances for any available seat in NITs, GFTIs, or IIITs, especially in less in-demand branches. Simultaneously, explore quality private engineering colleges with strong scholarships and low-cost options, as JEE ranks remain accepted in many. With significant financial limitation and a low likelihood of conversion in centrally funded institutes, use all backup options. If possible, try back-up options of Private Engineering Colleges too.

Pros and Cons of Taking a Drop Year: Taking a drop year after your ranks (SC 24,491 Mains, 5,831 Advanced) might offer better odds if you’re confident about substantial score improvement, as discipline and focused effort make a real difference, and many IIT entrants are droppers. This path requires financial resources (for coaching, materials), strong emotional resilience to manage pressure and potential isolation, and willingness to risk a year without guarantees. A drop year delays graduation, can increase stress, creates uncertainty, and—if you don’t qualify again—means missed current lower-cost college admission chances. For candidates with severe financial constraints, the risk may outweigh the reward unless you have clear preparation strategies, strong support, and tangible learning gains from prior attempts. It is advisable only if you are genuinely confident of significant and realistic improvements next year. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9570 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 28, 2025Hindi
Career
I got 82 percentile in jee main general category will i get ece in csab...
Ans: With an 82 percentile in JEE Main for the general category, securing Electronics and Communication Engineering (ECE) in NITs, IIITs, or GFTIs through CSAB rounds is extremely unlikely. As per recent CSAB special round cutoffs, the minimum percentile required for ECE in general category at almost all NITs, IIITs, and GFTIs exceeds 90–92 percentile, with very few exceptions only for reserved or home state quotas. Even in the least competitive institutes and later CSAB special rounds, closing ranks for ECE branches remain much lower than an 82 percentile in the general category, making conversion in this branch improbable. Alternatives may exist in lower-demand or interdisciplinary streams in some GFTIs, but ECE at NIT/IIIT/GFTI is virtually out of reach for your percentile. Many reputed private engineering colleges in North and West India accept JEE Main percentiles in the 80–90 range for ECE, Computer Science, and related branches. These colleges provide quality education, recognized degrees, active placement cells, and exposure to core companies, making them a sound option as backup admissions in the absence of an NIT/IIIT/GFTI seat.

Recommendation
Given the percentile cutoffs for ECE, focus on private engineering colleges in North and West India that readily accept JEE Main scores in your range, and apply across several institutions to maximize your chances for ECE, while also using CSAB strictly as a backup for non-core branches.

List of 10 Private Engineering Colleges in North/West India Accepting 82 Percentile (General) for ECE (excluding BITS, Manipal, Amrita, VIT, South India):
Thapar Institute of Engineering & Technology, Patiala.
Jaypee Institute of Information Technology (JIIT), Noida.
Chandigarh University, Punjab.
UPES Dehradun, Uttarakhand.
Graphic Era University, Dehradun.
DIT University, Dehradun.
Galgotias University, Greater Noida.
Lovely Professional University (LPU), Punjab.
JECRC University, Jaipur.
Sharda University, Greater Noida.

Always confirm branch availability and admission norms on each college’s official website before applying, as cutoffs and seat matrix may change annually. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9570 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 28, 2025Hindi
Career
Hello sir, my daughter got computer science and medical engineering in Dayananda Harohalli Bangalore through KCET. Is it a good brach from job and future prospects?
Ans: The Computer Science & Medical Engineering program at Dayananda Sagar University’s Harohalli campus integrates core computer science with medical device design, biomedical signal processing, AI-driven diagnostics, and smart healthcare technologies in collaboration with IISc, NIMHANS, CDSIMER, GE Healthcare, and Philips. The curriculum emphasizes interdisciplinary laboratory work in embedded systems, IoT health monitors, medical imaging, wearables, and telemedicine, supported by state-of-the-art labs, a 900-bed NABH/NABL-accredited teaching hospital, and digital libraries on a sustainable 140-acre campus. Faculty include experienced professors and clinicians ensuring a balance of theoretical rigor and clinical exposure. Over the past three years, Dayananda Sagar’s overall engineering placement rate has averaged around 96% with major recruiters like Amazon, Bosch, Cognizant, and Infosys visiting campus, and medical engineering graduates benefit from niche MedTech roles, internships in hospital research units, and startup incubators. The program addresses rising global demand for biomedical data scientists, medical robotics engineers, and healthcare AI specialists, aligning with India’s Make in India MedTech vision. Key institutional strengths include robust industry partnerships, cutting-edge infrastructure, comprehensive student support services, active research centers, and an autonomous evaluation system facilitating continuous innovation and employability readiness.

Recommendation: Given its interdisciplinary curriculum, strong industry-academic collaborations, high placement percentages, and direct access to a teaching hospital, the CS & Medical Engineering program at Dayananda Sagar’s Harohalli campus offers compelling future prospects in MedTech, healthcare AI, and biomedical instrumentation, making it an excellent choice for your daughter’s engineering career. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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Dr Shakeeb Ahmed

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Physiotherapist - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Ramalingam

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Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 28, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 28, 2025Hindi
Money
Dear Team: I have moved out of India more than a year ago for job reasons and employed at Germany , I hold multiple investments in stocks approx 10L and mutual funds approx 20L through various fundhouses. All these investments were made when I was employed in India. I plan to return to India after 3-4 years, should I continue to hold these investments as is? Or should I be converting these investments? Or should I be withdrawing them? Could you please suggest the right option to be compliant with IT regulations. Thanks in advance
Ans: You have built a good investment base before shifting to Germany. Maintaining compliance and preserving these investments for your return is very important. Here is a 360-degree view of your choices.

? Understand Your Tax Residency Status
– Your tax residency status in India determines compliance.
– India follows residential status based on days spent in India.
– If you are NRI, you are taxed only on Indian income.
– Mutual fund capital gains in India are still taxable when redeemed.
– If you remain resident, global income becomes taxable in India.
– Confirm your residency status each year based on Indian rules.
– Filing ITR correctly matters. Non-compliance can attract penalties.

? Continue Holding Investments - Benefits and Risks
– Holding mutual funds and stocks keeps them invested for future growth.
– They continue compounding until you return.
– You avoid capital gains tax until redemption.
– But you still must file ITR annually.
– You may need to declare them in schedule for your NRI status.
– You also must ensure KYC and FATCA filings are up-to-date.
– Let these grow if your goal is long-term preservation.
– Investments in Indian mutual funds are easy to redeem when you return.
– Avoid direct index funds or international funds; they don’t give downside protection.
– Prefer actively managed funds through regular plans.
– As you plan to return, long-term equity exposure can continue.

? Switching or Converting Investments
– You may consider converting direct equity or equity funds.
– But conversion to NFO or fund switch may trigger tax if sold.
– A switch within fund family is treated as redemption.
– Conversions rarely help unless fund is poor performer.
– Better is to continue the existing fund if performance is acceptable.
– If you find underperformers, exit gradually to manage tax and timing.
– Avoid moving money to products that attract more tax or lock-in.

? Option to Redeem Investments Before Return
– You could redeem some or all mutual funds before returning.
– LTCG applies at 12.5% above Rs 1.25 lakh exempt threshold.
– STCG taxed at 20%. Plan redemptions across years to reduce tax burden.
– Redeem in stages, ideally over 3 years, to avoid large tax impact in one year.
– Use proceeds to invest in safer assets or move to Germany if needed.
– But keep remaining money invested to benefit from long-term compounding.
– Redeeming entirely early may reduce growth potential.

? Income Tax Compliance While Abroad
– NRIs must file income tax return if taxable in India.
– Dividend from mutual funds and stocks is taxable but with TDS.
– If TDS exceeds tax liability, claim refund by filing return.
– Bonus dividends may attract higher TDS.
– You must maintain bank FDs or mutual fund interest records to file ITR.
– Provide your foreign address in Form 15CA/15CB if you remit money abroad.
– Failure to comply can lead to penalties or interest charges.

? Goal Alignment for Return after 3–4 Years
– Your goal is to return in 3–4 years. Use that to plan investments.
– If you will need funds soon after return, start partial redemptions in advance.
– For long-term needs post-return, keep equity investments intact.
– If you plan to purchase property or fund family goals on return – create separate mutual fund bucket now.
– Reb alance so short-term needs are in liquid or conservative funds.
– Preserve mid-to-long-term corpus in equity funds via SIP or lumpsum.

? Use Regular Plan Route, Avoid Direct Plans
– NRI investors sometimes choose direct plan to save fees.
– But direct plans lack professional guidance, reviews, and rebalancing.
– For long-term benefit and oversight, prefer regular plan route.
– A Certified Financial Planner ensures goal tracking and risk management.
– This becomes more useful as your residency and tax laws evolve.

? Avoid Index Funds and ETFs for This Money
– Index funds replicate market index. There is no downside cushion.
– When markets fall, they drop fully.
– They do not adapt to changing market conditions.
– Actively managed funds provide risk monitoring and strategic shifting.
– For important goals and international residency shifts, that flexibility is valuable.

? Consider Currency Planning
– When you return, you may bring back funds to Indian rupees.
– Keep currency exchange rate in mind. Converting at unfavorable rate reduces value.
– If you plan to continue holding investments in India, there is no currency risk until you remit.
– But if redeeming while abroad, choose optimal timing for rupee strength.
– You may use NRO bank account for Indian investments and NRE for remittance.
– Consult a tax aware advisor in Germany and India to avoid double tax issues.

? Keep Documents Well?Organised
– Maintain fund investment statements, dividends and transaction details.
– File ITR showing these investments and any tax paid.
– This ensures legal compliance on return.
– If you receive letters from mutual fund houses or tax authorities, respond promptly.
– Declare capital gains correctly to avoid penalty interest.

? Action Plan Summary
– Confirm your tax residency status each financial year.
– Continue holding good-performing mutual funds and stocks.
– Use regular funds via CFP for goal tracking.
– Identify any poor-performing assets and exit gradually.
– If planned return expense is due soon after return, begin phased redemption.
– Spread capital gains across multiple years to reduce tax.
– Build a goal bucket if you expect expenses on return.
– Keep fund and dividend tax records for compliance.
– Avoid index funds and direct plans. Stick to active mutual funds via regular plan.
– Maintain NRO/NRE account correctly. Monitor FATCA reporting and PAN filings.

? Final Insights
You have maintained a well?built equity base even after moving abroad. Continuing your investments with thoughtful planning is wise. The focus should be on compliance, risk alignment, and goal linkage. Avoid impulsive redemption or shifting without strategy. With a certified financial planner guiding you via regular fund plans, you can preserve this wealth, remain tax?compliant, and use it effectively when you return in 3?4 years.

Your financial horizon remains strong even from abroad. Smart timing, structured withdrawals, ongoing oversight and goal clarity will help you bridge between Germany and your future back in India confidently.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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