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I've been with him for 9 years, should I marry him?

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |676 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 19, 2024

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Sep 06, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Ohk so I'm in relationship from last almost nine years and I want to marry him and since our relationship started I've putted every single effort I treated him like king ???? now he's saying that I'll get the best and rich guy in future since I'm only child of my parents but I want to marry only him...He doesn't every speak to his jijaji and Didi about our relationship what should I need to do...c

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

If he is not sure about the relationship, maybe it's time you have a serious discussion with him. Ask him once and for all, what are his intentions. Don't let him turn this on you with "you will find better guys." If he says so, let him know that that's your concern, not his; ask him to clearly state his plans- does he want to take this relationship ahead and get married or is he confused? If he isn't sure about you, I don't see why you would want to stick to him still. I understand it isn't easy to leave someone you have loved for so long, but a long relationship does not equate to a healthy and happy one. Please think about your future, and understand your worth.

Best Wishes.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |645 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 23, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 22, 2024Hindi
Relationship
Hii ma'am... I'm in relationship with my boyfriend for about 5 years and we both love each other a lot..We are doing MBBS and preparing for IAS alongside..He is an amazing human being.. considerate kind honest compassionate...He is really smart intelligent and determined to achieve everything he sets his eyes on...He is just so confident... a good human being...He respects me a lot..never been a time in 5 years he yelled at me in loud voice or he said or did something bad to me...like he loves me a lot and says he is doing everything for me.. his studies achievements and all are for me..He is everything I will want in a husband The problem is ... I'm a Jaat girl and he is Brahmin boy..His family agreed to our marriage...my parents are not ready at any cost for an intercaste marriage I'm from a well off family..my parents both are in govt jobs..He isn't from a rich family so my parents say that there needs to be a family background otherwise you will face problems...They say that I should find a boy who matches me in the looks.. They don't like his looks...Also his and mine home are almost 300 km from each other adding to the problem...my parents say that they won't want me to live so far from them that they can't even meet me regularly...They say that you will be busy in jobs and being so far we won't be able to meet you and you also won't be able to come..he should've been from same district... Their main objections are.. Intercaste..His looks.. Family background..Money.. Distance They have sacrificed a lot for me and I've always been a child who didn't ask for anything..never saying no to my parents..and all.. Always been close to them..it is very difficult for me to hurt them...but I love this boy so much..I can't even imagine marrying someone else..He is everything I would ever want in a husband... Ma'am please consider all the aspects and please advise accordingly what should be done..are my parents right..or they aren't...what should I do.. I'm stuck..
Ans: One thing that’s important to consider is that, ultimately, the person you marry will be the one who you will spend your life with—not your parents. It’s you who will navigate the everyday realities of this partnership. You’ve already seen the kind of partner your boyfriend is, and it sounds like you trust him deeply. He’s shown commitment, love, and respect, and those qualities are foundational to a long-lasting, fulfilling relationship.

When it comes to your parents, their concerns about caste, financial background, and distance are understandable, but these are challenges that many couples can and do overcome. Financial stability can change with time, and distance is something that can be managed with compromise, especially if both you and your partner have career goals that align. What matters most is the emotional connection and support you offer each other. It’s possible that once your parents see how happy and fulfilled you are with him, they may come around, even if it takes time.

I think one of the most crucial steps here is communication—not just with your boyfriend, but with your parents. You mentioned that you’ve always been a respectful and compliant child, and that’s a beautiful testament to the relationship you’ve shared with them. However, this might be the moment where you need to lovingly express your desires and assert your independence as an adult. Your happiness and well-being in a marriage should be the central concern. Try having an open, calm conversation with them where you acknowledge their concerns but also explain how deeply you feel for your boyfriend, emphasizing the qualities that truly matter to you—his kindness, his respect for you, and the life you want to build together.

While it’s natural to want your parents’ approval and blessing, it’s also important to recognize that they might not fully understand your relationship unless they see it from your perspective. It’s not about rebelling or hurting them—it’s about being honest with them about who you are now and what you want for your future. It may take time for them to come to terms with it, but as they see the strength of your commitment, they may begin to soften their stance.

If, after many conversations, they still cannot accept your choice, you’ll have to weigh your options. You can continue to work on slowly helping them see your perspective, or you may have to make a decision that prioritizes your happiness, even if it’s difficult in the short term. Marriage is a lifelong commitment, and being with someone who supports, loves, and respects you as your boyfriend does will be far more valuable in the long run than external factors like caste or background.

Ultimately, it’s about what kind of life and partnership you envision for yourself. If your boyfriend is the one who aligns with your values, dreams, and emotional needs, you might need to help your parents understand that, even if it means navigating some tough conversations ahead.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 24, 2024Hindi
Relationship
will soon be 25 yrs old but havent got a job yet and my partner is 29 yrs old. We know each other for the past 7-8 years and we are in a very healthy relationship so much happy with each other. We hv told about us in our families. They are willing to let their son marry the girl of his choice and in my family except my father everyone is happy for us. My mom likes him so much. He met my mom few times even came to home but havent met my father yet. I hv told my mom about us since march & my father in july. Since then me and my father are having heated arguments whenever i am trying to explain why i cant marry anyone by his choice. And i wish to marry this person. His issues are- Patriarchal thinking that how can a girl choose a guy for her marriage, its their parents job. Who told me to find a guy on her own. Secondly, Him being a maharashtrian. We belong to UP but living in mumbai for more than 25 years and my father has plans to shift back in UP after his retirement which is after 4 years. So he doesnt want me to leave here all alone by myself. Also he doesnt like maharashtrians, not even a bit. Thirdly, he is doing a private job but he is earning 70-80k monthly since my father is a govt employee. Hence he has got issues. What issues i am facing- he is giving all kinds of threats he can to stop me fir even dreaming about to get marry this person. He says even if the earth ends tomorrow i will not let you marry the person of your choice. It is our job to find a groom not yours. My elder brother who is 4 years older than me and my sister who is one year younger than me both are studying in delhi. It is just me and my mom and my younger brother who is in 8th std living here. And none of our relatives lives here. So he is verbally and physically abusing us. Even threatened me to put my partner and his family behind bars if they forces us to get marry. Since our (my and my mom) convincing and explaining to him is falling on deaf ears , we (my & my partner) are willing to take drastic step and get married in court. We are hoping that now only police intervention can help us to be with each other. But we are not taking this step right now cz many things are holding me back but we are willing to take if things goes even more worse later. Since we are not finding it worth to wait for his approval. Nor he wants to listen why i want to marry this person and what are my reasons to refuse any guy my father chooses for me. Neither willing to see or meet my partner. My mother is on my side. She even asked my partner to meet some of our relatives and family friends everyone liked him and us. Its just my father who is having and creating so many issues. Everyone wants to hlp us but jst because of my father's nature (him being a true narcissist perdon) all are hesitating about how to even start a conversation with him unless he doesnt talks abt this with them. My father is also avoiding to talk about this situation with anyone since it will bring down his reputation, what will the society and relatives think about us. Noone will marry my siblings if they get to know about this that their sister has forcefully left the house to marry the guy of her own choice. Please suggest me something what else i can do to make him understand and should i stop making efforts and do whatever i want to not now but after sometime. Take drastic step and leave the house. I also know what will be the consequences of my actions but can i do if he doesnt want me to see me happy or believing in my decisions. Atleast he should listen and see him personally that what i saw in this person. But he doesnt want. Please guide me.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
What can you do if your father has a rigid thinking like this? Like you yourself have mentioned: that your father must see what you saw in this person.
So, how much effort has gone into that? It seems that all of you are quick to judge that your father is strict and that he does not like people from certain states etc...Okay, he is who he is, right? So, now tune your efforts from complaining about him to what you can do to make him see the good in your partner.
Also, I hope that your partner is in a reasonably good financial state for his age else this will become an issue with your father.
Address your father's concerns and that will help you and your partner actually move things further. You becoming financially independent also will give your father confidence that you are old enough to make certain decisions of your life.

Also, your mother supporting you is of little use; if your father has always been in charge, she will have little say in the matter, so do not depend on anyone right now. Take it upon yourselves now to address what your father finds worrisome and take each point and build something useful to counter that.
It will not be possible or wise to force him to agree as that may not happen, so work on actually making him see what you see in your partner.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 10, 2025Hindi
Money
I am 47 years old. I have started investing in mutual fund (SIP) only since last one year due to some financial obligations. Currently I am investing Rs.33K per month in various SIPS. The details are: Kotak Mahindra Market Growth (Rs. 1500), Aditya BSL Low Duration Growth (Rs. 1400), HDFC Mid-cap Growth (Rs. 12000), Nippon India Large Cap Growth (Rs. 3000), Bandhan small cap (Rs. 5000), Motilal Oswal Flexicap Growth (Rs. 5000), ICICI Pru Flexicap growth (Rs. 5000). I have also started to invest Rs. 1,50,000 per year in PPF since last year. Can I sustain if I retire by the age of 62?
Ans: I can help you with your retirement planning.
You have given a very detailed picture of your investments.
You have also shown strong intent to build wealth at 47.
This itself is a big positive start.

Your Current Efforts

– You started late due to obligations.
– That is understandable.
– You still took charge.
– You now invest Rs.33K every month.
– You also invest Rs.1,50,000 a year in PPF.
– You follow discipline.
– You follow consistency.
– These habits matter the most.
– These habits will help your retirement.
– You deserve appreciation for this foundation.

» Your Current Investment Mix

– You invest in various equity funds.
– You also invest in one low duration debt fund.
– You invest across mid cap, large cap, flexi cap, and small cap.
– This gives you some spread.
– You also invest in PPF.
– PPF gives safety.
– PPF gives steady growth.
– This mix creates balance.

– Please note one point.
– You hold direct plans.
– Direct plans look cheaper outside.
– But they are not always helpful for long-term investors.
– Many investors pick wrong funds.
– Many investors track markets wrongly.
– Many investors redeem at wrong times.
– This affects returns more than the saved expense ratio.
– Regular plans through a MFD with CFP support give guidance.
– Regular plans also help you stay on track.
– Behaviour gap is a major cost in direct funds.
– Thus regular plans with CFP support work better for long-term investors.
– They can correct mistakes.
– They can help with asset mix.
– They can help you stay steady during market drops.
– This gives higher final wealth than direct funds in most cases.

» Your Retirement Age Goal

– You plan to retire at 62.
– You are 47 now.
– You have 15 years left.
– Fifteen years is still a strong time line.
– You can allow compounding to work well.
– Your corpus can grow meaningfully by 62.
– You can also improve your savings rate during this time.

» Assessing If Your Current Plan Supports Retirement

– There are many parts to assess.
– You need to look at your saving rate.
– You need to look at your growth rate.
– You need to look at your future lifestyle cost.
– You need to look at inflation.
– You need to look at post-retirement income need.
– You need to see if your present plan matches this.

– Right now, your total yearly investment is:
– Rs.33K per month in SIP.
– That is Rs.3,96,000 per year.
– Plus Rs.1,50,000 in PPF each year.
– So your total yearly investment is Rs.5,46,000.
– This is a good number.
– This can help your retirement journey.

» Understanding Equity Funds in Your Mix

– You invest in mid cap.
– Mid cap can give good growth.
– Mid cap also carries higher swings.
– You invest in small cap.
– Small cap is the most volatile.
– It can give high returns if held for long.
– But it needs patience.
– You invest in large cap exposure.
– Large cap gives stability.
– You invest in flexi cap.
– Flexi cap funds adjust strategy.
– Flexi cap funds give managers more control.
– Active management is useful in Indian markets.
– Fund managers can shift between market caps.
– They can pick good sectors.
– This improves return potential.
– This is a benefit that index funds do not have.
– Index funds just copy the index.
– Index funds do not avoid weak companies.
– Index funds cannot take smart calls.
– Index funds also rise in cost whenever the index churns.
– Active funds can protect downside.
– Active funds can find better opportunities.
– This is helpful for long-term wealth building.
– So your move towards active funds is fine.

» Understanding PPF in Your Mix

– Your PPF adds stability.
– It gives assured growth.
– It also gives tax benefits.
– It builds a stable part of your retirement base.
– It reduces overall risk in your portfolio.
– It works well over long years.
– You have also chosen a steady long-term asset.
– This is beneficial for retirement.

» Gaps That Need Attention

– Your funds are scattered.
– You hold too many schemes.
– Each additional scheme overlaps with others.
– This reduces impact.
– It also becomes hard to track.
– You can reduce your scheme count.
– A more focused mix can give smoother progress.
– Rebalancing becomes easier.
– You can keep fewer funds but maintain asset spread.
– You can also map each fund to a purpose.

– You also need clarity about your retirement income need.
– Many investors skip this.
– You must know how much money you need per month at 62.
– You must add inflation.
– You must add health needs.
– You must also add lifestyle goals.

» Your Future Lifestyle Cost

– Your cost will rise with inflation.
– Inflation affects food, transport, medical needs.
– Medical inflation is higher than normal inflation.
– Retirement planning must consider this.
– You also need to consider family responsibilities.
– You must consider emergencies.
– You must also consider rising cost of daily life.
– This helps estimate the required retirement corpus.

» Your Future Corpus From Current Savings

– Without giving strict numbers, you can expect growth.
– You invest steadily.
– You invest for 15 years.
– Your equity portion can grow better over long time.
– Your PPF gives predictable growth.
– Your mix can create a decent retirement base.
– But you will need to increase your SIP over time.
– You can raise your SIP by 5% to 10% each year.
– Even small increases help.
– This builds a stronger corpus.
– Your final retirement amount becomes much higher.

» Need for Periodic Review

– Markets change.
– Life situations change.
– Your goals may shift.
– Your income may rise.
– Your responsibilities may change.
– Review every year.
– Adjust as needed.
– A Certified Financial Planner can help.
– This gives clarity.
– This gives structure.
– This gives confidence.
– You can reduce mistakes.
– You can follow proper asset allocation.

» Asset Allocation Approach for Smooth Growth

– You must decide your ideal equity percentage.
– You must decide your ideal debt percentage.
– If you take too much equity, risk increases.
– If you take too little equity, growth reduces.
– You must keep balance.
– It must match your risk comfort.
– It must support your retirement goal.
– Right allocation brings discipline.
– Rebalancing once a year helps.
– Rebalancing controls emotion.
– Rebalancing increases long-term returns.
– Rebalancing keeps your portfolio healthy.

» Importance of Staying Invested During Market Swings

– Markets move up and down.
– Swings are normal.
– Equity grows over long time.
– Equity needs patience.
– People often fear drops.
– They exit at wrong time.
– This hurts long-term wealth.
– You must stay steady.
– You must trust your long-term plan.
– You must follow guidance.
– This improves retirement success.

» Avoiding Common Mistakes

– Many investors pick funds based on recent returns.
– This is risky.
– Fund selection needs deeper view.
– Fund must match your risk.
– Fund must match your time horizon.
– Fund must have consistent process.
– Fund must show reliable pattern.
– Avoid sudden changes.
– Avoid chasing trends.
– Stay with a disciplined plan.
– This ensures better results.

– You must avoid mixing too many categories.
– Focused mix works better.
– Smaller set makes control easy.
– This reduces confusion.

– Do not rely on direct funds for long-term goals.
– Direct funds lack guided support.
– Behavioral mistakes cost more than the lower expense ratio.
– Regular plans help you stay invested.
– They help avoid panic.
– They help during reviews.
– They help create proper asset allocation.
– They help you use the fund in the right way.
– Investment discipline is more important than low cost.
– Regular plans with CFP support deliver this discipline.

» Inflation Protection Through Growth Assets

– Equity protects from inflation.
– PPF adds safety.
– Balanced mix protects your purchasing power.
– Retirement needs this balance.
– Long-term equity portion helps create a healthy corpus.
– This allows you to meet rising living cost.

» How to Strengthen Your Retirement Plan From Now

– Increase SIP every year.
– Even slight hikes help.
– Be consistent.
– Avoid stopping during market drops.
– Do a yearly check-up.
– Reduce scheme count.
– Keep a clear structure.
– Assign each fund a purpose.
– Build an emergency fund.
– This will protect your SIP flow.
– Continue PPF.
– It gives stability.
– It protects your long-term needs.

» Possibility of Sustaining Life After Retirement

– Yes, you can sustain.
– But it depends on three things:
– Your future living cost.
– Your total corpus at retirement.
– Your discipline during retirement.

– If you continue your present saving, your base will grow.
– If you raise your SIP each year, your base will grow faster.
– If you keep a proper asset mix, your base will grow safely.
– If you avoid emotional mistakes, your base will stay strong.
– If you review yearly, your plan will stay on track.

– So sustaining life after retirement is possible.
– You just need stronger structure.
– You also need steady guidance.
– This ensures confidence.

» Retirement Income Planning After Age 62

– Your retirement income must come from a mix.
– Part from equity.
– Part from debt.
– Part from stable instruments.
– Do not depend on one source.
– Plan your withdrawal pattern.
– Take small and stable withdrawals.
– Keep some equity even after retirement.
– This helps your corpus last longer.
– Do not shift everything to debt at retirement.
– That reduces growth too much.
– Balanced approach keeps your money alive.
– This supports your life for long years.

» Health and Emergency Preparedness

– Health costs rise fast.
– You must plan for it.
– Keep health insurance active.
– Keep top-up if needed.
– Keep separate emergency money.
– Do not depend on your investments during emergencies.
– Emergency fund protects your retirement portfolio.
– This keeps compounding intact.
– You can handle shocks with ease.

» Tax Awareness

– Be aware of mutual fund tax rules.
– Equity long-term gains above Rs.1.25 lakh per year are taxed at 12.5%.
– Equity short-term gains are taxed at 20%.
– Debt funds are taxed as per your slab.
– Plan redemptions wisely.
– Do not redeem often.
– Keep long-term horizon.
– This reduces tax impact.
– This helps wealth building.

» Summary of Your Retirement Possibility

– You have a good start.
– You have a workable time frame.
– You have a steady contribution.
– You must refine your portfolio.
– You must increase SIP yearly.
– You must reduce scheme count.
– You must follow asset allocation.
– You must stay disciplined.
– You must get yearly review from a CFP.
– If you follow these, you can reach a healthy retirement base.

» Final Insights

– You are on the right path.
– You have taken the key step by starting.
– You can still create a strong retirement corpus even at 47.
– Fifteen years is enough if you stay consistent.
– Your mix of equity and PPF is good.
– With discipline and structure, your future can stay secure.
– With yearly guidance, you can avoid mistakes.
– With increased SIP, you can boost your corpus.
– You can aim for a peaceful and confident retirement at 62.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10878 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 10, 2025

Money
I am 43 yrs old, have sip in Nifty 50 - 3500 Nifty next 50 - 3000 Nippon large cap - 3500 Hdfc midcap - 2500 Parag Flexicap - 3000 Tata small cap - 1300 Gold sip - 500 Hdfc debt fund - 700, lumsum of 10000 in motilal midcap and 20k in quant small cap. accumulated around 2.30 lakhs, started from June, 2024. But overall xirr is very less 3.11. Should I continue the above sips or which sips should be stopped?
Ans: You have started early in 2024, and you already built Rs 2.30 lakhs. This shows discipline. This shows patience. This gives you a good base for your future wealth.

Your XIRR looks low now. This is normal. You started only a few months back. SIPs show low return in the start. Markets move up and down. Early numbers look flat. They look small. They look discouraging. But they improve with time. They improve with longer SIP flow. So please stay calm. The start is always slow. The finish is always strong.

Your effort is strong. Your SIP list is wide. Your savings habit is good. You started at 43 years, but you still have good time to grow your wealth. Every disciplined month builds confidence. Your choices show that you want growth. You want stability. You want balance. This is a good sign.

» Current Portfolio Snapshot
You invest in many groups.

– You invest in Nifty 50.
– You invest in Nifty Next 50.
– You invest in a large cap fund.
– You invest in a midcap fund.
– You invest in a flexicap fund.
– You invest in a small cap fund.
– You invest in gold.
– You invest in a debt fund.
– You put lumpsum in a midcap and small cap fund.

This looks wide. But wide does not mean effective. You hold too many funds in similar areas. That gives duplication. That reduces clarity. That reduces control. You need sharper structure. You need cleaner lines.

» Why Your XIRR Is Low
Your XIRR is only 3.11%. This is normal. Here is why.

– SIP started in June 2024. Very new.
– SIP amount spread across many funds.
– Market volatility in 2024 made early returns look low.
– SIP returns always look weak in early days. They grow with time.

Low short-term return is not a sign of failure. It is not a sign to stop. It is only a sign of market timing. SIP is for long periods. Not for few months.

» Problem of Index Funds in Your Portfolio
You invest in Nifty 50 and Nifty Next 50. Both are index funds. Index funds follow a fixed rule. They copy the index. They do not use research. They do not use fund manager skill. They do not adjust during bad markets. They do not protect much in down cycles. They lock you into index ups and downs.

In India, active fund managers add value. They find better stocks. They exit weak stocks faster. They manage risk better. They use research teams. They use market cycles well. They often beat index returns over long periods.

Index funds look simple. But they lack decision power. They lack flexibility. They lack protection. They give average results. They track the market exactly. They cannot outperform it.

So index funds are not the best choice for your long-term goal. Active funds give more control and more upside over long years.

» Problem of Too Many Funds
You hold too many funds across the same categories. This creates overlap. Two different schemes may hold same stocks. You think you diversify. But you repeat exposure. This weakens your plan.

Too many funds also keep your attention scattered. It reduces discipline. You waste time comparing each fund. You feel lost. You feel uncertain.

Better to keep fewer funds but stronger funds.

» Problem of Direct Funds
If any of your funds are in direct plans, please take note. Direct plans look cheaper because they have lower expense ratio. But they do not give guidance. They do not give personalised strategy. They do not give support during market falls. They do not give behavioural guidance.

Many investors make wrong moves in market dips. They stop SIPs. They redeem at the wrong time. They switch funds too often. They chase returns. This reduces wealth.

Regular plans through a Certified Financial Planner keep you disciplined. They give structure. They give long-term guidance. They reduce errors. They reduce behaviour risk. This helps more than small cost savings.

Regular plans also offer better hand-holding for asset mix, review and goal clarity. This adds real value.

» Fund-by-Fund Assessment
Let me now look at each SIP.

Nifty 50 – This is an index fund. It is passive. It is rigid. Active large-cap funds do better in many years. You may stop this over time.

Nifty Next 50 – Another index fund. Very volatile. Very narrow. You may stop this too.

Nippon large cap – This is active. This is fine. It can stay.

HDFC midcap – This is active. Good long-term category. You can keep this.

Parag flexicap – Flexicap is versatile. Useful for long-term. You can keep this.

Tata small cap – Small caps can grow well. But they need patience. They also need limited allocation. You can keep, but maintain control.

Gold SIP – Small gold SIP is okay for safety.

HDFC debt fund – Debt brings stability. Small SIP is fine.

Lumpsum in midcap and small cap – Keep these invested. They will grow with cycles.

The two index funds are the most unnecessary parts of your plan. These can be stopped. These can be replaced with good active funds already in your system.

» Suggested Structure
You need a cleaner layout.

Keep one large cap active fund.

Keep one midcap active fund.

Keep one flexicap fund.

Keep one small cap fund.

Keep one debt fund.

Keep a small gold part.

This is enough. This gives balance. It gives clarity. It gives growth. It avoids overlap. It avoids confusion.

» SIP Continuation Guidance
Here is the simple view.

Continue your large cap SIP.

Continue your midcap SIP.

Continue your flexicap SIP.

Continue your small cap SIP.

Continue gold SIP.

Continue debt SIP in small proportion.

Stop the Nifty 50 SIP.

Stop the Nifty Next 50 SIP.

Move those two SIP amounts into your existing active funds. This gives you better long-term power.

» Behaviour and Patience
Your returns will not show big numbers for now. You need time. You need patience. You need consistency. SIP is not a race. SIP is a habit. SIP grows slowly. Then it grows big.

Do not judge your plan by the first few months. Judge it after many years. That is where SIP wins. That is where compounding works. That is where discipline shines.

» What Matters More Than Fund Names
The biggest cornerstones are:

Your discipline.

Your patience.

Your time in market.

Your stable SIP flow.

Your emotional stability.

These matter more than any fund selection. You are building them well.

» Asset Mix Guidance
Your mix of equity, debt and gold is good. But you should review this once a year. As you move closer to retirement, increase debt slowly. Reduce small cap slowly. This protects you. This stabilises your progress.

A Certified Financial Planner can help align your asset mix to your goals. This adds real value. This gives stronger structure.

» Taxation View
If you redeem equity funds in future, then keep the current rule in mind. Long-term capital gains above Rs 1.25 lakhs per year are taxed at 12.5%. Short-term gains are taxed at 20%. For debt funds, both gains are taxed as per your income slab.

This will matter only when you redeem. For now, your focus should be growth, not selling.

» Your Long-Term Wealth Path
You have good earnings years ahead. You have strong potential for growth. Your SIP habit is strong. You only need to clean your portfolio. You only need better structure. Then your money will grow well.

You can grow a meaningful corpus if you stay steady. You can even increase SIP when income grows. This gives faster results.

» Emotional Balance
Do not check returns every week. Do not check every month. Check once in six months. Check once in twelve months. SIP is a long game. Treat it like a long game.

Your small XIRR today does not decide your future. Your discipline decides it. You already have it.

» Step-by-Step Action Plan

Step 1: Stop Nifty 50 SIP.

Step 2: Stop Nifty Next 50 SIP.

Step 3: Keep all the remaining SIPs.

Step 4: Shift the stopped SIP amount into your existing large cap and flexicap funds.

Step 5: Continue gold and debt in small amounts.

Step 6: Review once a year with a Certified Financial Planner.

Step 7: Increase SIP amount slowly when income grows.

Step 8: Stay invested for long term.

Step 9: Do not judge returns too early.

Step 10: Keep your patience strong.

» Finally
Your foundation is strong. Your habit is disciplined. Your mix only needs refinement. Your returns will grow with time. Your portfolio will gain strength with consistency. Your path is steady. Your plan will reward you if you follow it with calm and clarity.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Shalini

Shalini Singh  |180 Answers  |Ask -

Dating Coach - Answered on Dec 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 10, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hi. I have been in a long distance relationship since 6 months,and i have known my boyfriend since 10 months. He is very understanding, caring,and honest person. He had already told everything about us for his parents and their parents agreed. We both are financially independent. I told my relationship to my parents and they are against it as my boyfriend is from lower caste, different region, not done his degree from a reputed college but a local engineering college, and his status. They are thinking about relatives, and society what will they say, about their pride, status, and all the respect they have earned uptill now will vanish because of my decision. My parents are very protective of me and have given me everything and like me a lot.They are saying its long distance you might have met only 15 times you don't see this person daily to judge his character. If you have known this person for atleast 2/3 years, with u meeting him daily it would be different. But the person i met is honest from the start. They are hurting daily because of my decision. I cant go against them and be happy.
Ans: 1. It is wonderful you have met someone special and in last 10 months you have met him 15 times which averages to meeting him 1.5 times a month. Is it possible to increase this and meet over every second weekend. Can you both travel once.

2. Parents are parents they worry and all parents are protective of their children as are yours. But if they are declining you because of caste etc then please question them asking them to give you an assurance that if they marry you to someone of their choice things will work - In reality there can be no assurance given for any relationship - found by you or introduced by parents as relationships need work by both...both need to grow up, both of you need to be happy individuals for relationship to work + if colleges were the deciding factor then we would not see divorces of those who married in the same caste or are from Stanford, MIT, IIT, IIMs, Inseads of the world.

Here is a suggestion/ recommendation
- meet his family
- get him to meet your parents
- let both set of parents meet

all the best

...Read more

Naveenn

Naveenn Kummar  |235 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner, MF, Insurance Expert - Answered on Dec 09, 2025

Money
Dear Naveen Sir, I am 55 Years old and have five more years in superannuation. My monthly take home is approx. 6 Lacs PM . I have accumulated 2 Cr. in MF , 1.5 Cr in PF , 1 Cr FD and NPS and LIC put all together will be approx 50 Lacs and payout will start from 2028 onwards. I have just booked one 4 BHK and take home loan which is construction linked plan . Possession will be in 2029. My Daughter and Son are on Marriage age but both are also earning handsomely as they are in 30% bracket of IT . Have parental property approx 1.5 Cr which i will get in due course of the time. Monthly expenses are approx 1 Lacs only . Please suggest the way forward for next 5 Years .....how and where i start investing ....
Ans: Dear Sir
For a comprehensive QPFP level financial planning and retirement assessment we request the following details. These inputs will allow financial planner to prepare an accurate inflation-adjusted roadmap covering risk protection, income stability, investment strategy and long-term financial security.
________________________________________
1. Personal and Family Details
Your age and planned retirement year.
Spouse’s age, working status and future income expectations.
Number of dependents and their financial reliance on you.
Any major medical conditions in the family.
________________________________________
2. Parents’ Health and Financial Dependence
Current health condition of parents.
Do they have their own medical insurance cover.
Sum insured and type of policy.
Any critical illness or pre-existing conditions.
Monthly financial support you provide to them if any.
Expected future medical or caretaker expenses.
________________________________________
3. Income and Cash Flow
Monthly take home income.
Expected increments or bonuses for the next five years.
Monthly household expense structure.
Existing EMIs and financial commitments.
Monthly surplus available for investments.
Any expenses expected to rise due to inflation or lifestyle changes.
________________________________________
4. Home Loan and Liabilities
Sanctioned home loan amount, interest rate and tenure.
Current disbursement status under construction linked plan.
Your plan for EMI servicing and part-prepayment.
Any other loans or financial liabilities.
________________________________________
5. Real Estate Profile
Is this 4 BHK your first home or do you own other properties.
Any rental income from existing properties.
Purpose of the new 4 BHK after retirement for self, parents or children.
Your plan for the parental house. Retain, sell or rent.
Where you plan to settle post retirement.
________________________________________
6. Investment Portfolio
Current mutual fund corpus and category-wise split.
SIP amounts and investment horizon.
PF, EPF, PPF and other retirement scheme balances.
Fixed deposit amounts, maturity periods and ownership structure for DICGC protection.
NPS allocations Tier 1 and Tier 2.
LIC policies with surrender value and maturity year.
Any bonds, NCDs, PMS, private equity or invoice discounting exposure.
________________________________________
7. Emergency Preparedness
Current emergency fund value.
Loan facility available against MF or FD.
Any credit line for medical or sudden expenses.
________________________________________
8. Insurance Protection (Self and Spouse)
Term insurance coverage and policy details.
Health insurance sum assured and insurer.
Top-up or super top-up cover details.
Critical illness and accident cover status.
Adequacy of insurance after accounting for inflation.
________________________________________
9. Children’s Goals and Planning
Are you contributing financially to your children's planning.
Any corpus set aside for their marriage.
Children’s own investment and insurance setup.
Any future goals involving them.
________________________________________
10. Retirement Vision and Income Planning
Expected retirement lifestyle and monthly cost adjusted for inflation.
Your preferred retirement income structure
SWP from mutual funds
Annuity or pension products
PF interest
NPS annuity
Rental income
Plans to monetise or downsize real estate if needed.
Any travel, medical or lifestyle goals post retirement.
________________________________________
11. Estate and Succession Planning
Will availability and last update date.
Nominations across MF, PF, NPS, FD, LIC, demat and bank accounts.
Any instructions for asset distribution.
________________________________________
Next Step
Only Once you share these details, financial planner can prepare a complete five year roadmap covering asset allocation, inflation-adjusted corpus projections, loan strategy, insurance adequacy, medical preparedness, pension and SWP planning, liquidity management and post-retirement income stability.


Disclaimer / Guidance:
The above analysis is generic in nature and based on limited data shared. For accurate projections — including inflation, tax implications, pension structure, and education cost escalation — it is strongly advised to consult a qualified QPFP/CFP or Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD). They can help prepare a comprehensive retirement and goal-based cash flow plan tailored to your unique situation.
Financial planning is not only about returns; it’s about ensuring peace of mind and aligning your money with life goals. A professional planner can help you design a safe, efficient, and realistic roadmap toward your ideal retirement.

Best regards,
Naveenn Kummar, BE, MBA, QPFP
Chief Financial Planner | AMFI Registered MFD
https://members.networkfp.com/member/naveenkumarreddy-vadula-chennai
044-31683550
Asked on - Dec 10, 2025 | Answered on Dec 10, 2025
1. Personal and Family details:- My Age is 55 and July 2030 I will be superannuate 2. My wife is having business but very notional return , however her share in land and building vvalue is approx.-50 Lacs . 3. No Major health issue ( I have taken Health policy and GTL ) Parents :- They are independent and drawing handsome pension and living happily without depending upon us 4. Take Hoe salary is 5 Lacs which will increase 10% YOY in next 5 years. 5. Monthly expenses :- Rent of House 40 K , EMI 30 K and 50 K regular exp. 6. Monthly surplus :- 2 to 2.5 Lacs PM 7. Home Loan :- Just started EMI which will increase gradually and in 2030 at the time of possession of house it will be 1.2 Lac PM and than 40K rent will also nullify 8. Post Retirement :- Will settle in NCR where I will have own 4 BHK . 9. Investment Portfolio:- FD (Self and Family ) :- 1 Cr. Mutual Fund :- ( Daughter :- 1 Cr. Wife 1 Cr and self 50 Lacs ) and having Blue chip shares in the name of all three aprrox cost 50 Lacs PF :- have 85 Lacs and will reach approx. 1.5 in 2030 NPS :- Tier -1 Account where I have 20 Lacs now and every year deposit 2 Lacs . LIC :- Self and family :- from 2028 onwards will get start payout … approx. 15 Lac every year from 2028 to 2033. HDFC Jeevan Sanchay :- Will start from 2030 onwards @1.75 Lacs PA . ICICI Signature will get Mature in 2027 ( 7 Years Policy) Family is fully protected with Health Insurance Policy ( Self Son and daughter are covered GTL policy also) Parental Properties :- Approx 1.5 Cr will be ( 75 Lacs in the name of wife and 50 Lacs on my name as per will ) Children :- Both Children are independent and son is managing his portfolio by own having CTC 50 Lacs age is 27 Yers. Working with MNC . Daughter has just started with Government Hospital ( MD Pediatrics ) drawing 20 Lacs PA as of now . Daughter in law ( Under discussion ) is also in the 25-40 Lacs band. Future Road map: - Want to increase corpus up to 10 Cr and also want to book one more flat in the name of my son/daughter. Buy Agriculture land where I want to start my organic food business.
Ans: thanks for taking time , we cannot plan over chat and give holistic solutions
it is strongly advised to consult a qualified QPFP/CFP or Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD). They can help prepare a comprehensive retirement and goal-based cash flow plan tailored to your unique situation. Financial planning is not only about returns; it’s about ensuring peace of mind and aligning your money with life goals. A professional planner can help you design a safe, efficient, and realistic roadmap toward your ideal retirement.
Best regards,
Naveenn Kummar,
BE, MBA, QPFP Chief Financial Planner | AMFI Registered MFD
Nism certfied Retirement Planner
https://members.networkfp.com/member/naveenkumarreddy-vadula-chennai
044-31683550

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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