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Rishta Guru - Answered on Feb 12, 2024

Rishta Guru is a relationship expert whose advice goes beyond romance. Rishta Guru can also guide you about the problems you face at home, with your friends, in your building, at your educational institution or at your workplace.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 12, 2024Hindi

There is news of so many celeb divorces in the news. Marriages are so much more challenging these days. What is the secret to a good relationship between a husband and wife? How to make sure a marriage is long lasting?

Ans: Hello.
I can understand your worry.
It’s important to remember that celebrities are humans like the rest of us and face their own problem. At the same time, do also remember that many celebrities have marriages that have lasted decades and continue to flourish.
As a couple, you can build a strong, lasting relationship through effort and commitment. While guaranteeing a marriage's longevity is impossible, there are certainly qualities and actions that contribute to healthier relationships.
1. Strong communication:
Be open and honest. Share your thoughts, feelings and needs with your partner and ask them to share with you as well.
Be respectful and empathetic when you listen to their perspective. Don’t interrupt. Don’t judge.
2. Healthy conflict resolution
Learn to disagree respectfully and constructively.
You may have read/heard this before but it is important that you remember this. During these kinds of conversations in particular, avoid blame, personal attacks and bringing up past issues. Seek solutions together rather than trying to ‘win’ arguments.
3. Be kind, be respectful. Appreciate what you partner does
Treat each other with kindness.
Acknowledge and appreciate each other's contributions to the relationship and express gratitude regularly.
Respect individual differences and boundaries. Allow space for each other's individual interests and pursuits.
Support each other's goals and dreams. Be each other's cheerleaders and encourage personal growth.
4. Quality time and intimacy:
Make time for each other as a couple doing something you both enjoy. This time does not include daily routines and responsibilities.
Nurture physical intimacy in ways that feel comfortable and fulfilling for both partners.
Maintain emotional intimacy by sharing experiences, vulnerabilities and dreams.
Try your best understand your partner’s emotional needs.
5. Shared values and goals
Have open and honest conversations about your core values and long-term goals.
Work together towards achieving shared goals and dreams. Support each other's individual goals as well, even if they differ slightly.
Be adaptable and willing to grow together. Life experiences and individual needs may change over time, so be prepared to adjust and support each other's evolution.
6. Professional help
Seek professional help from a therapist or counsellor if you're facing challenges in communication, conflict resolution or other areas of your relationship.
Therapy can provide a safe space to explore issues and develop healthier communication and coping skills.
Remember, every relationship is unique and what works for one couple might not work for another. The key is to nurture your relationship, communicate openly and honestly and be willing to adapt and grow together.
It's also important to acknowledge that, even with best efforts, challenges may arise and sometimes relationships end. If you find yourself struggling, remember that seeking professional help or ending a relationship that is no longer healthy can be positive steps towards personal growth and future happiness.