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Trapped in a Marriage: Seeking Advice on Divorce

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |663 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 17, 2025

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Feb 17, 2025Hindi
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Relationship

I am married but my relationship with my wife is not good. For past 5-6 year wife was not living in my house but when I said that need divorce recently she came to my village house. Now she is living in my village house and She says that She will give divorce. I am determined that I can not live with her but now she is not ready to give divorce and she is staying in my house. Suggest me what should I do for the divorce.

Ans: Since your wife initially agreed to the divorce but is now refusing and staying in your house, the situation has become more complicated. In such cases, the best course of action is to proceed through legal channels. Before taking any legal steps, consider attempting reconciliation or mediation. Sometimes, involving trusted family members or neutral third parties can help reach a mutual agreement. If that doesn’t work, consult a qualified family lawyer who can guide you through the divorce process according to the laws in your jurisdiction. They can provide the best legal advice based on the specific circumstances of your case. If mutual consent isn’t possible, you may need to file for a contested divorce by stating valid legal grounds. Your lawyer will help you prepare the necessary documents and represent you in court. Even if she stays in your house, it won’t stop the legal proceedings. Stay calm and patient, as divorce cases can take time.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |663 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 04, 2024

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I am married person since 2015. From last 2 to 3 years it is not working properly. Due to some following problems, 1. I am only one boy in my family. I don’t have any brother or sister. My father is also passed away, so there is need of child in my family because now I am at the age of 30. But my wife is not physically strong. There is always some health issue with her. 2. There is education gap too in between us. She is metric level education and I am engineer. Due to this we don’t have that much effective communication leads to conflicts in every situation. She never give respect to my mother and never do regular house works to and at the end of the day again conflicts arises between my mother and my wife. 3. I want to give divorce to her but unfortunately she is purposely not ready for that because she knows very well that she will never been happy in another house like my house. 4. Same problem when I discussed with her mother and father, they straight forward refuse to give divorce; they said, “if you have any problems or want to give divorce then go to those person who are responsible for marriage or who finalize your marriage”. Lastly, I am now at dead end and don’t know the solution of how to escape from this situation.
Ans: Dear Rajesh,
First and foremost, it's important to prioritize your own well-being and happiness, as well as that of any potential children involved. While divorce may seem like the only solution, it's also worth considering seeking professional help, such as marriage counseling or therapy, to try to address the issues in your relationship and explore potential avenues for improvement.

If communication is a significant challenge due to education and cultural differences, a therapist or counselor can help facilitate more effective communication and understanding between you and your wife. They can also provide guidance on how to navigate conflicts and differences in a constructive manner.

Additionally, it may be helpful to involve a neutral third party, such as a religious or community leader, to mediate discussions between you, your wife, and your respective families. They may be able to provide support and guidance in finding a resolution that is mutually acceptable and respects the well-being of all parties involved.

Ultimately, the decision to pursue divorce or to work on improving the relationship is a deeply personal one, and there is no one-size-fits-all solution. It's important to take the time to carefully consider your options and seek support from trusted friends, family members, or professionals as needed.

..Read more

Dr Upneet

Dr Upneet Kaur  |83 Answers  |Ask -

Marriage counsellor - Answered on Apr 16, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 05, 2025Hindi
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hi iam 53 yhears old got married around 18 yearsw back to my wife she is no 39 years old good evening i got married and i have three kids elder is 18 years younger is 16 years and i have daughter of 10years old since my marriage there was always clash between me and my wife for small silly reasons it was going on but since 3 years the clash become very rash and she even gave complaint on me to lady police station she threated me and every night i come late that time i am taking drinks she started to quarrel even not allows me to have food she drive me wild and in my unconsious mind i oftenly i use to abuse her with bad words even my neighbours many time they came to resolve the problem now she is asking property which i have gained from my parents. and since one year she is treating me like stray dog and never allowes me to have sex routenly she sleep like a dead in my bed. she left my house taking my all kids since last 6 months i forced to live alone now by some how i manage to bring her to my house along with kids but she refused having sex with me and she neverhad sex with me since 7 months i have becom patient of depression i dont know what to do please help me in this regard thank you
Ans: Hello sir. I have read your message and I would first like to express my opinion that a partner is not always for sex. There are many other ways to take care of your partner. You could take your wife out for dinner, go out on a picnic, go with with her to her parents' house. But when we dont do all these things and just want sex from partner. That doesn't work. At this age she might be going through some hormonal changes also. I suggest you to start behaving nicely with your wife and start taking care of her. Slowly the things will improve between you too.
Take care !
Regards
Dr Upneet kaur
Reach me : https://www.instagram.com/dr_upneet

..Read more

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Archana

Archana Deshpande  |120 Answers  |Ask -

Image Coach, Soft Skills Trainer - Answered on May 19, 2026

Career
sir am 26 yrs old . and I was doing company secretary couse but unfortunately couldn't clear in 2024 i join my father's personl office he was a accountant and later started his own firm and he was a advocate.. but sometimes I feel that ca degree is important for our office work when it comes to audit . so for providing ace to office I want to pursue ca but it's too hard as am not able to clear cs like ( 199 ) marks left with only 1 marks to pass . so I have a doubt that am not able to pas cs so how can I pass ca . i don't talk with my parents about my this thinking .. it's like am able to clear cs ? with ofc ? or not ? or it's just a bad decision for me ! please sir replyyyt !
Ans: Dear Priyanka,

Thank you for being so honest about everything!

Do you like CA and CS first of all? This is the first question you have to ask yourself!

The next question I want to you ask yourself is, ‘am I scoring less marks because I have not studied / lack of interest or lack of understanding of concepts?’ Seek help if you really want to clear these exams!

Next question is ask yourself , “what comes naturally to me and I love doing it?”. It can be anything…. cooking, baking, teaching, accounting, handling customers in your dad’s office, taking care of office administration, etc, list out everything and then home down to one thing and start working on it with honesty of purpose, let that become your way to earning money!

And please sit and have a heart to heart chat with your parents!
If verbal communication is a problem, write a letter to them… I am giving you options, choose what is comfortable to you , but talk to your parents!

All the very best…

...Read more

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