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Stuck in a remote area, feeling trapped: What are my options?

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |597 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 14, 2025

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Brijesh Question by Brijesh on Mar 22, 2025Hindi
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Relationship

Main problem for me in my house i stay in far away place connected with city but not a proper city nor i have funds to suffice for mr only thing is that to get seperated and walk away from this relation all the doors are closed

Ans: Let me tell you something gently and with complete honesty—you still have choices, even if right now they feel small or out of reach. You may not be able to walk away immediately, but you can begin to prepare yourself—emotionally, mentally, and eventually financially. You don’t need to have all the answers or resources at once. You only need to believe that you deserve peace, that you deserve dignity, and that you deserve a second chance at a life where you're not just surviving.

Start by asking yourself: What small, realistic step can I take to feel a little more in control again? Maybe it's revisiting a skill you had, trying for a part-time freelance role, or even just building a tiny network of support—someone you can talk to once a week, even if it’s online. It might take time, but slowly, you will begin to find your footing.

Even in the darkest of times, when everything seems lost, there is always a way forward—it just may not be visible yet. Don’t underestimate your strength. You’ve survived everything up until now, and that is not nothing. That means you are strong, even if you don’t feel it today.

You are not alone. And this is not the end of your story.

You don't have to do it all at once. You just need to believe that you can.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |597 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 05, 2024

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Relationship
Hello madam, My name is Deepthi am 37 years old married woman with 8 months old infant .in 2011 may I got married to a good man it was arranged marriage. Upto now we are living our life's both sides parents are not supportive ,we are only taking care of child ,the thing is neighbour s (women)are asking y ur parents and inlaws are not supportive , emotionaly putting me down,I am isolated and taking care of child life is becoming challenging for me ,how to gain mental strength,dareness to raise kid ??? another thing is my husband is taking care of my kid and me both sides parents not accepting me without money ,I did not yet recovered fully , emotional ly, physically . neighbour women emotionally draining me creating panic that how u will raise kid alone .I want to distance both parents temporarily .madam how to move ahead in life my husband is always supportive
Ans: Hi Deepthi,

Navigating the challenges you're facing, from feeling isolated without support from both sides of the family to dealing with emotionally draining neighbors, is incredibly tough, especially as you care for your 8-month-old infant and work on your own recovery.
Firstly, recognize and embrace the support you have from your husband. He is a vital source of strength in your life. Open and honest communication with him about your feelings and struggles can fortify your partnership and help you both tackle these challenges together. Knowing that you have a supportive partner by your side can make a significant difference in how you cope with these pressures.

When it comes to your neighbors, setting boundaries is crucial. You don’t owe them explanations about why your parents and in-laws are not supportive. Politely but firmly let them know that you prefer not to discuss personal matters and that you are managing your situation in your own way. Protecting your emotional well-being from their intrusive questions is essential for maintaining your peace.

Focusing on your recovery is paramount. Taking care of an infant is incredibly demanding, and prioritizing your health is critical. Make sure you are getting enough rest, eating well, and finding small moments to recharge throughout the day. Engaging in activities that bring you joy and peace, whether it’s a hobby, quiet time with your baby, or connecting with supportive friends, can help in your emotional recovery.

To counteract the feelings of isolation, seek out social support. Look for mother-and-baby groups or community activities where you can meet other parents who might be experiencing similar situations. Building connections with others in similar stages of life can provide mutual support and reduce the sense of being alone in your journey.

Building mental resilience is another key step. Practices like mindfulness or meditation can help you stay grounded and manage stress more effectively. Journaling your thoughts and feelings can provide a therapeutic outlet, and engaging with inspiring books or podcasts can offer new perspectives and encouragement.

Regarding your parents and in-laws, it might be beneficial to distance yourself temporarily. Focus on creating a healthy and nurturing environment for yourself and your baby. If interactions with them are causing you stress, consider setting clear boundaries to protect your peace. Communicate your needs and expectations clearly, emphasizing that your primary concern is the well-being of your immediate family.

If the emotional strain becomes overwhelming, seeking professional help is a valuable option. A counselor or therapist can provide a safe space to explore your feelings and offer strategies to cope with your challenges. Professional support can help you build emotional resilience and give you the tools to manage your situation more effectively.

It’s important to recognize and celebrate small wins in your daily life. Every day brings its own set of challenges, but also moments of success. Whether it’s a peaceful moment with your baby, a positive interaction with your husband, or simply making it through a tough day, acknowledging these victories can boost your morale and remind you of your strength and capability.

You are doing an incredible job under very challenging circumstances. Trust in your ability to raise your child and build a happy life. You are not alone; your husband’s support and your own inner strength are your greatest allies. Focus on what you can control, shield your mental well-being from external negativity, and believe in your capacity to overcome these hurdles. With time, patience, and self-compassion, you will find your way forward.

..Read more

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8615 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 31, 2025

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Hi sir, My age is 45 years. I am currently investing in SIPs in mutual funds, ICICI Prudential Bluechip Fund Growth (RS 2500) and Motilal Oswal Large and Midcap Fund Growth (Rs 3000), Quant mid cap (RS 3000), Kotak equity emerging (RS 3000) and Parag Parikh flexicap (RS 4000). My risk profile is high and my investment horizon is up to the age of 55 years. I will require approx 1cr for my kid's education after 10 years and for retirement (1 cr) after 10 years. I have stopped SIPs in Axis small Cap fund and Mirae Asset Emerging Bluechip Fund Growth and their amount of 56000 and 264000 has not yet been redeemed. My total investments in till date is approx 9.85 lakhs. Also I can invest up to Rs 25000/pm in SIPs. I also want to do rebalancing of Axis small Cap and Mirae Asset Emerging Bluechip Fund Growth fund amounts in small caps and hybrid fund, pls suggest. Is my porfolio suitable as per my goal. Pls suggest.
Ans: Your discipline towards mutual fund investing is admirable. You already have a good head start with your current investments. But let’s assess your portfolio, rebalance it smartly, and align it with your goals clearly.

Here is a complete 360-degree assessment of your mutual fund portfolio.

 

Portfolio Suitability as per Your Goals
You are 45 years now. Your key goals are after 10 years.

 

You want Rs. 1 crore for your child’s education.

 

You also want Rs. 1 crore for your retirement corpus.

 

These goals are achievable. But your portfolio needs alignment.

 

Your SIPs are currently Rs. 15,500. You can go up to Rs. 25,000.

 

This gives you room to restructure and grow your wealth.

 

Your risk profile is high. This supports growth-oriented funds.

 

Your investment horizon of 10 years is very reasonable.

 

So, equity-oriented funds can play a major role here.

 

You also need to reduce overlapping and duplication in categories.

 

Based on your age and goals, a proper category mix is important.

 

Also, monitoring performance is key to long-term success.

 

Evaluation of Current Portfolio
You have invested in large cap, large & mid cap, mid cap and flexicap.

 

This is a good mix across market cap segments.

 

However, some schemes have overlapping exposure.

 

You had SIPs in two good schemes that are now discontinued.

 

The Axis small cap fund has Rs. 56,000 invested.

 

The Mirae Asset emerging bluechip has Rs. 2.64 lakhs invested.

 

These are idle now. They must be rebalanced as per your strategy.

 

Total investment till now is approx Rs. 9.85 lakhs.

 

Your ongoing SIPs are across 5 different categories.

 

Portfolio rebalancing is needed to avoid overexposure.

 

There is no allocation to hybrid or balanced advantage funds.

 

You can add those for stability, especially as you age.

 

You need a mix of growth and risk control over the next 10 years.

 

Recommended SIP Structure
You are willing to invest Rs. 25,000 per month in SIPs.

 

That gives you Rs. 9.5 lakh of new investment in the next 3 years.

 

For proper diversification and balance, follow this structure:

 

Large Cap Fund – Rs. 4,000 monthly

 

Large & Mid Cap Fund – Rs. 4,000 monthly

 

Mid Cap Fund – Rs. 5,000 monthly

 

Flexicap Fund – Rs. 5,000 monthly

 

Hybrid Aggressive or Balanced Advantage Fund – Rs. 5,000 monthly

 

Small Cap Fund – Rs. 2,000 monthly

 

This structure ensures broad diversification and better returns.

 

It also provides smoother journey with balanced allocation.

 

Rebalancing of Existing Idle Investments
Axis Small Cap fund holding is Rs. 56,000.

 

Mirae Asset Emerging Bluechip Fund holding is Rs. 2.64 lakhs.

 

These amounts should not lie idle or underperform.

 

You can redeem these and reinvest as follows:

 

Rs. 1.5 lakh to hybrid aggressive fund or balanced advantage fund

 

Rs. 1.2 lakh to a small cap fund of your choice

 

Use STP if you are shifting full amount to equity funds again.

 

Spread the switch over 6 to 9 months to reduce volatility risk.

 

This will bring back discipline and better long-term compounding.

 

It will also bring stability and growth into one basket.

 

How to Align Portfolio with Education and Retirement Goals
Your education and retirement goal both need Rs. 1 crore each.

 

So you need Rs. 2 crore in total after 10 years.

 

You already have Rs. 9.85 lakh invested.

 

You plan to invest Rs. 25,000 per month now.

 

This disciplined investing with proper fund mix will help.

 

Small cap, mid cap and flexicap will deliver long-term growth.

 

Hybrid and large cap will bring portfolio stability.

 

Rebalancing and yearly review will help you stay on track.

 

Avoid reacting to short-term volatility and stay invested.

 

Key Adjustments to Improve Returns
Avoid duplication in similar category schemes.

 

Select only one strong fund from each major category.

 

Shift idle lump sum into hybrid and small caps via STP.

 

Avoid sector funds, thematic funds or international funds now.

 

Increase SIP by 5% every year if income allows.

 

Review SIPs yearly. Drop laggards. Replace only after 3-year review.

 

Stick to 5-6 funds maximum in total.

 

Keep your funds manageable and meaningful.

 

Regular vs. Direct Funds
You should always invest through regular plans via a trusted MFD.

 

A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can guide you better.

 

Direct funds may save some cost but give no advisory support.

 

They are for experts who understand the markets deeply.

 

Wrong selection in direct mode leads to poor returns.

 

In regular plans, your MFD with CFP gives continuous support.

 

This is key when markets are volatile or during fund underperformance.

 

Proper advice leads to better overall results than cost savings.

 

SIP Discipline and Risk Management
Continue SIPs without breaks. Markets may fluctuate.

 

But long-term SIPs deliver strong results with compounding.

 

Rebalance every year. Shift part of equity to hybrid over time.

 

In final 2 years before goal, reduce equity to protect capital.

 

Keep emergency fund in liquid mutual fund for peace of mind.

 

Review your portfolio performance every 6 months.

 

Track progress towards Rs. 2 crore goal.

 

Tax Considerations for Mutual Fund Investors
Equity fund long term capital gains (LTCG) over Rs. 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%.

 

Short term capital gains (STCG) taxed at 20%.

 

Debt and hybrid fund gains taxed as per your income slab.

 

Plan redemptions smartly to reduce tax outgo.

 

Use STP or SWP to manage taxes near goal maturity.

 

Insurance and Emergency Cover
Ensure you have health insurance and term life cover.

 

Keep 6 months’ expense in liquid fund as emergency buffer.

 

Do not mix insurance with investment.

 

No ULIPs, no endowment or money back plans.

 

Your focus must remain on mutual funds only.

 

Final Insights
Your investing habits are strong. You are consistent.

 

Your fund categories are well selected but need tweaking.

 

You must act on idle investments to improve overall returns.

 

Add hybrid and small cap exposure smartly.

 

Avoid over-diversification and direct plans.

 

Keep a long-term view and follow up every year.

 

Increase SIPs when possible and do goal-based planning.

 

You are on the right track. Some rebalancing will take you faster towards your goals.

 

Keep emotions out. Let data and strategy guide your investment path.

 

Best Regards,
 
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
 
Chief Financial Planner,
 
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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