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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1437 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 07, 2021

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
DS Question by DS on Jul 07, 2021Hindi
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Relationship

Ma'am, I am a 42 old male educationist by profession, a non-smoker and non-alcoholic.

I got married late at 40 through a matrimonial site after almost one year of chatting with a girl from another district aged 33 who otherwise is sweet and is 2nd among four sisters.

Before marriage they told me that after marriage she would get transferred from her government teaching job in her own locality to my home district.

But after marriage she stays in her own house, comes once a week on Saturday and leaves by Monday morning.

Worse, every day her sister calls up more than six times and spend 15 to 40 minutes over phone.

I unconsciously feel cheated being as single as before. She has clearly told she won't leave her job nor can do anything about transfer.

My parents' repeated requests to her father (an education officer) has fallen into deaf years.

Now without physical and emotional intimacy I get provoked. Arguing for every word she says makes matters worse.

Recently in anger I threw her phone away and now things are out of control.

Her younger sister warning me has made things worse.

Ma'am either I will commit suicide or go mad.

Ans: Dear DS, firstly, suicide is never an option.

So there is no necessity to think of it as challenges are a part of everyone’s lives and how we respond to these challenges define our entire lives.

Why does she choose to stay at her parents’ place?

I don’t see the reason in your write-up. Did the two of you have an argument?

Why is it that her parents don’t talk to her about settling down in a married life?

Sometimes, it need not be one reason but many to break down a marriage.

It mostly starts with assumptions, and we start to believe that this is true.

Her sister calling her 6 times in a day is just something that you choose to be irritated with which maybe in a happy marriage you might have made fun of.

Right now, every single thing associated with her, is what you choose to think of as a reason for the way the marriage is.

It takes two to make a marriage. I would like you to ask yourself: Have I in anyway contributed even a little to create this situation?

What this does is, helps you focus on what you can also change and that may help her understand you better and possibly make room for a discussion between the two of you.

Also, at 33, she possibly has been leading a very independent life and suddenly expecting her to change and settle into a marriage might take a while.

Be loving and caring without expecting and things can start to change.

But I know that she refuses to stay with you but when she does over the weekend, instead of arguing, simply unconditionally love her without asking for anything in return.

Love breaks down a lot of anger, resentment, and any assumptions that she maybe carrying.

Maybe talking to her sister gives her some sense of comfort and by pointing that out, might anger your wife and her sister which is what has happened.

Try something else; simply love as hard as this maybe.

You have married at an age where both of you have led a fairly independent life and to bring both your lives together, some amount of work has to go in.

If this fails, ask an older member of your family to step in and talk to her parents. Seek help when you think this is required.

Create a happy life.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Love Guru

Love Guru   |204 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 20, 2022

Relationship
I am from mechanical background and work as an engineer. My wife is an IT professional. We got married in 2014 by finding through matrimony site and same caste. I belong from Haryana and she is primarily from UP and we have grown in different cities. She has one sister (IT professional) who got divorced in 2012 and married again in 2014 after our engagement. Everything was fine. The story started after the engagement. I noticed she used to talk her jija (PG guest house renter) and I showed him caution since she did not attend my call in between. I again noticed her commanding behaviour when we were selecting the menu selection (food) for the upcoming function that was to happen at my place but I ignored it. Honeymoon was in Singapore where his brother played a role for ticket arrangement and agency where I paid her half the amount as per her wish. In the honeymoon also, I noticed she use to go to the bathroom and keep sending information to her family members which I ignored. By now I was of a view that she use to share thick and thin with her family members. After we married, I was supposed to go to Pune for two nights and she was alone in our flat. When I came back, I asked the security guard to share visitors list and saw her jija’s name (might be with her sister). I took a photo and went to the flat. I asked her anyone had come and she lied to me. Then it turned to be a hell fight and in the morning she put herself on her knees and said sorry and said it will not repeat. But this did not stop here. My and her office was in Gurgaon and sometimes she said please come for pickup. I went to her office two hours prior to her given time and caught her again with her jija and her sister. This kind of stuff I noticed two-three times. Once, we were roaming in a craft mela and we came across her jija and her sister. She used to go her home without telling for how much time she is going and all. This resulted in no stuff shared by me also. Her parents never called me and I also never connected with her parents and brother or her family. Whenever any fight happens, she shouts loudly to attract attention and she uses sex as a tool to forget every matter and move on. On the festival front, she carries on with her ways and has never accepted our ways. She always mentions, ‘Tum logon ko puja bi nahi karni aati.’ Her brother and parents visited only five-six times in seven years. They have a big time connection with elder jija. We have never take any penny from her salary till now because, on many occasions, I found her of ill-mentality. With God’s grace, we have two flats and our financial background is good. Whenever I try to ask her about her bank balance, she never gives answers. I tried to convince her that you pay my loan, I will give you EMI, but she always said she will think about it. I have four sisters. After we married, we visited them. She never gave them a penny and would always ask me; she would also say that I don’t have khulle paise. On one occasion she said, “Mere paise chori ho gaye.” It was the initial stage so we ignored it. But after that my shirt went missing and some stuff went missing. We also noticed a few times that our money was also stolen. We suspect her but are not sure about her behaviour. My sisters stay in the village and they came once in a year so there is no disturbance from my family. My mother is 75 years old and a very polite lady. She stays with us and interferes nothing in matters. We have two kids now. One of our kids is just ignoring her and the second kid is somewhat going with her and when I am at home he also usually spends time with me. She is never kind of playing and mixing person with kids and my behaviour is to mix and that’s the reason both kids connect well with me. Her parents stay in Dhanbad. She had gone there one year back but the kids refused to go. She put the blame on me. I told her that I can come along with kids to which she said big joke. After coming back from home, I notice she started saying no to everything -- like going our second home in the village or to attend any ceremony or saying no to sex, etc. Though I am a through gentleman, we ignore her but recently she provoked me and I said blah, blah, blah since she also use blah, blah, blah and recorded and called her brother and mother at our home. They use her father only for calling. Her father called and said, ‘Why are you using bad language?’ I said the same was used by her. They came my house twice for meeting. Her brother was quiet and mother overspoke. My wife used to threaten me three-four time for divorce and I kept ignoring her words. I mentioned this to her mother. Her mother in that meeting she will be here with taunting. She did the same thing to provoke second time and this time her mother use to never stop shouting along with my wife. Her brother also used abusive language and they brought one retired inspector. However, that retired person talk genuinely. He was from Haryana and, on many points, he mentioned festivals have family traditions. I never like her food in seven years not due to the bad reflection but due to her making recipe. I tried to change it in initial days, but she always tries to be heavy on me once I approach kitchen. So I left that and started eating. After two recent fights, there are no talks and I have kept one maid to cook my food. Now she used to go in the market/bank /her family frequently to disturb the atmosphere of the family. The big disconnect I found is she is full with backbiting and negative approach behaviour and never gives heed to positive behaviour. Either she will be quiet or she will be loud and attach no midway to discuss and debate. After all this, what I concluded is that my wife is totally hacked mind and adopted ill tactics to down me. Her family members are playing smartly and may be using her money also at the same time I observe that she don’t want to break with me. They want to put pressure on me by emotion/threaten means for the gaps (kids are not connected with her or her family). My thinking is time is a big healer and I have large mind to digest the situation comings. Please suggest me what can be best interest of this situation. Thanks
Ans:

Most of what you have written makes no sense.

If she is attached to her sister and brother-in-law, or even to her whole family, that should not be an issue for you. They are her family.

It’s not like she’s having an affair. And it’s not like she spends an unreasonable amount of time with them, is it? In fact, her parents are not even in the same city.

You not liking her cooking sounds like a complaint from the Middle Ages -- hiring a cook seven years ago would have helped instead of fighting!

And if she has a temper problem, that can be addressed as well, with mature discussions between the two of you. Involving other family members there is a mistake.

You’ve given importance to so many non-issues in your mail to me that I’m wondering where exactly the problem lies. Visit a marriage counsellor -- both of you.

 

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |484 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 16, 2023

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I am 38, married male with two kids. I got in touch with a widow aged 48 years and in a good relationship. She proposed me first and initiated into relationship. Prior to our relationship, she was in a relationship of 27 years and was still in his touch. Her husband expired just five days into our relationship. After that, when i got to know her relationship of 27 years, i tried to brake the relationship but she insisted that she is just good friend to him, and nothing more now. I relied on her version. Lately, from the past six months, she made my life hell by levelling allegations on me that I have relationship with my sister in law. I tried to make her understand that I call her beta as she is around 23 but still doesnt want to understand. I broke her with on 27 june, but she came again in july this year and said sorry. During quarrel period, she made call to my wife, my friends and levelled filthy allegations against me. When she came back, I forgave her and tried to make peace with her. But after that too, she still believes that I am in relationship with my sister in law. I got fed up with her and again broke with her. One thing more that we both invested our money in making one building as builder. She doesnot have permanent source of income and relies on making money as PG counseller. During this, she suffered from financial problems and took care of her monthly expenses, her ration, etc. Kindly help.
Ans: It sounds like you've been through a complex and challenging situation. Dealing with personal relationships, especially when there are allegations and trust issues, can be very difficult. Here are some steps and considerations to help you navigate this situation:

Reflect on Your Priorities: Take some time to reflect on what you want in your life and what is most important to you. This includes considering your family, your own happiness, and your financial stability.

Open and honest communication is essential. It's important to have a calm and honest conversation with her about your concerns and feelings. Ask her to clarify her doubts about your relationship with your sister-in-law and express how these accusations are affecting you and your family.

Trust Issues: Trust is the foundation of any healthy relationship. If trust has been repeatedly broken, it can be challenging to rebuild. Discuss the importance of trust with her and see if there's a way to work together on rebuilding it. Be prepared to listen to her concerns as well.

Boundaries: It's essential to establish clear boundaries in your relationship. Discuss what is acceptable behavior and what is not. Make sure both of you are on the same page regarding these boundaries.

Counseling: Consider seeking the help of a relationship counselor or therapist. Professional guidance can be beneficial in resolving complex issues and improving communication.

Financial Matters: If you both have invested money in a property together, it's important to discuss how to handle this aspect of your relationship. Consult with a legal professional to understand your options and ensure a fair resolution.

Self-care: This situation has likely taken a toll on your emotional well-being. Ensure that you are taking care of yourself, both mentally and physically. Reach out to friends and family for support.
Reevaluate the Relationship: Reflect on whether this relationship is healthy and if it's in the best interest of both parties. Sometimes, it's necessary to make difficult decisions for your own well-being.

Talk to Your Wife: Be open with your wife about the situation. Let her know what has been happening and reassure her of your commitment to your marriage.

Protect Your Reputation: If this woman continues to make false allegations against you, it might be necessary to take legal action to protect your reputation. Consult with an attorney about any potential defamation or harassment issues.

Distance Yourself: If the relationship with this woman is causing you significant stress and harm, it may be best to maintain distance from her. Focus on your family, your work, and your own well-being.

Learn from the Experience: Use this difficult situation as an opportunity for personal growth. Reflect on what you've learned about yourself and your relationships, and use that knowledge to make better choices in the future.


Legal Advice: If the financial aspect of your relationship becomes contentious, consider consulting with a lawyer to protect your interests and explore legal options regarding the property you both invested in.

Remember that each relationship is unique, and there may not be a one-size-fits-all solution. The most important thing is to prioritize your well-being and the well-being of your family. It may also be helpful to involve a therapist or counselor to mediate the situation and provide guidance on how to move forward.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |484 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 26, 2024

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Hi I am 40 yrs with wife and kid of 7 yrs. My problem is family oriented. I have three sister, elder two sisters are well married and settled. My younger sister had an arrange marriage in 2004 and she had a divorce in 2011. With that marriage she has a boy child who is almost 18 now and too lazy, she as per her will did an intercaste love marriage in court in 2015 without informing anyone. I used to stay away in delhi and my parents and eldest sister(at her in laws place) in kolkata and d youngest married d guy 2 km from parents house. In 2017 i shifted back to kolkata as my wife was pregnant, so we took a decision dat now it would be better to stay in joint family as d kid will get grand parents and we will also serve my parents, but my youngest sister had a very bad habit of calling my mom every day almost 5-7 times and coming to parental house every alternate days which i rrsisted and i faced backlash from my parents and her too. Then suddenly things changed her husband became a very rowdy person and started beating her as she narrated and she came back to parental house with two kids one was from previous husband and one was from d court love marriage, now she stays in same flat where my parents stays. In 2017 aug my kid was born in 2019 she came back and den i again decided to leave house with my wife and kid as it was 2 bhk flat and all people flocked there as if ut was a zoo so i decided to leave with my family and we moved to ujjain and started living peacefully. Reason for leaving was my younger sis her eldest son and my dad has a very bad habit of shouting arguing nd fighting means domestic violence which i have seen in my childhood days even wen my dad used to do violence with my mom. Now i say her to take divorce and stay with parents or go back to her husbamd or where ever she wants. My dad is retired with a fixed income of around 20k per month. My sis and her son stays at home uses all facilities of home whereas when i shifted to ujjain i did all hardships and built my rented flat. Used to sleep on floor slowly we both husband wife worked hard and bought bed, kitchen utensils fridge and tv. Now my concern is she is not taking divorce and fully dependent on my father. She and her son both earn almost 35k together but their contribution towards house is big Zero towards ration is ZEro yes for basic dey dont pay anythng but like she pays for her small child school fees almost 3000 and whatever dey feel like eating extra den normal homely food she brings for her kids. As she is not taking divorce what can be main reason and future consequences to my kid and my life and my mom and dad have just become a free maid for her kids, my sis does all masti and roams freely till 9 pm without any concern for her kids as my mom is behind as maid to take care. Means my mom and dad have no saving cz of her and no personal life nor any social life cz dey have to take d youngest kid along with dem. My dad is 70 diabetic mom is 65 undergone bypass. Wen i say cz of yoi came back i have to leave dat house she says did i hold ur hand and say to go out. Where as i needed peace but i also need my parents as i want to take care of dem cz she treats dem like servants only. And my parentz dont understand dis dey hav soft cornor for her. She is like deemak but dey dont understand. Kindly guide me.
Ans: Your situation is complex, involving familial responsibilities and personal peace. To address it, start by understanding your sister's reasons for not seeking a divorce. Consider engaging a professional family counselor to mediate and provide support for everyone involved. Legally, explore the options available for ensuring she contributes financially to the household.

Your priority should be to protect your parents' well-being and your own family's stability. If your sister continues to burden your parents without contributing, it might be necessary to seek legal advice on how to manage this dependency. You may also need to discuss with your parents the importance of setting boundaries to ensure their health and financial security. Balancing compassion with firm boundaries is key to resolving these issues while maintaining family harmony.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1437 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 16, 2024Hindi
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Hi , I am a professor mech engineer , after death of my wife and due to having 5 year girl baby I planned for 2 nd marriage as I live alone away from home town because my of job with my little baby . I accepted a widow having 2 child ,she was working in a govt job 250 km away , after ensuring and agreeing her possibility of transfer and job vacancy @govt office near my house and ensuring she agreed that she will come to live with me along with her 2 kids and my little baby as her trasfer was due in comming few months . We lived apart during her job at 250 km away.,while meeting on weekly offs 6 /7 time in 6 months , then she take 360 degree u turn and said she will not get job transfer to my place and get her trasfer in other dept. in same previous office. And started telling many reasons like she will loose her children's inheritance in her in-laws property ,she will loose promotion , kids Don't want trasfer , and said we will live apart forever . This was contradictory to earlier agreed things .and my my purpose to live in family with my baby not fulfilled , so after long ruckus ,I mutually got divorce from her , Then After divorce I decided to marry non working women having no child and don't expect child as I am @48 year old and tired of living alone and managing job ,girl , house chores . I married to a divorcee girl from Pune ,she was BA first year college drop out girl of 44 yr age after 6 months of long dating on week ends . During 6 months I tried to know her indepth but was don't used to talk much as I was trying to know her true nature, we visited many places ,movies . She seemed perfect as per my requirement of girl wanting no child , and she is house wife . after marriage she behave well for 1 st week ,then she started trouble to hate my baby ( became kaikai )on pety things , she want my baby to house chores at the cost of her important year of 10th std study . She don't liked me taking tution of girl , she didn't like if I help my girl any way . She don't like if I spent some money on my girl . She used to fight all night and don't let me sleep . Now she stated demanding that she want baby , though I was against and b4 marriage agreed to not have any more child due to old age ,cost ,and no personal time for self , then I agreed to have child but b4 that I got her and my fertility tested ,she had weak eggs and syst on her reproductive organs and doc warned to not go for pregnancy due to risk and probability of unhealthy baby birth , but she kept repeating That she want child we consulted 4 Drs. She used to fight and go to her mother's home for 2/4 months after living with me for 2/3 days only . Now she wants divorce , and asks me to keep my girl in hostel if I want her in my life . This Ramayan has left me baffled , What should I do ??? .....
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
The reason to marry for you mainly has been companionship, a mother for your daughter...
And marriage is not a transaction BUT a meeting of minds...when there is no compatibility, there is no space for agreeing on the same things or wanting to make things work which is possibly what has happened with your 2nd and 3rd marriage.
If you want this marriage to work, there has to be an equal commitment by both of you, so, start by emotionally bonding first. Slowly build on this by making goals for the marriage and the future...your only goal can't be mother for your child...not all women are going to readily accept this and some may even falter along the way. Allow the lady and your daughter to bond together for sometime so they develop a unique relationship...
Understand that transactional relationships do not last; so, invest enough time in building trust in that companionship for it to become something meaningful

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jan 14, 2025

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Hi, i'm 49 years old and investing in HDFC Flexicap, HDFC Mid cap oppurtunities and ICICI prudential Nifty 50 index and also in NPS per month 5000 each. Is this sufficient for next 10 years.
Ans: Your current investment strategy reflects commitment and discipline. Here's a detailed evaluation and guidance for the next 10 years.

Existing Portfolio and Investment Pattern
Your investments in diversified equity mutual funds are a good starting point.

National Pension System (NPS) contributions add long-term security.

A balanced combination of equity and retirement-focused investments is appreciable.

Advantages of Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds outperform benchmarks during market volatility.

Fund managers adjust portfolios to seize opportunities and minimize risks.

Your selected funds offer growth potential through expert-driven strategies.

Drawbacks of Index Funds
Index funds merely replicate a market index without adapting to changes.

They miss opportunities to outperform during market corrections.

Actively managed funds suit long-term goals better with higher growth prospects.

Investment Diversification
A mix of equity categories provides stability and growth.

Mid-cap funds add growth potential, while flexi-cap funds offer stability.

Ensure your portfolio balances risk and long-term returns effectively.

National Pension System (NPS) Contribution
NPS is a disciplined, tax-efficient retirement savings tool.

Allocations to equity and debt within NPS align with your risk appetite.

Regular contributions ensure a robust corpus for retirement.

Monitoring Inflation and Future Costs
Inflation impacts purchasing power and future goals.

Assess if your investments match inflation-adjusted needs.

Consider additional investments if current contributions fall short of future requirements.

Tax Implications on Mutual Fund Investments
Equity mutual funds have new capital gains tax rules.

Long-term gains above Rs 1.25 lakh attract 12.5% tax.

Short-term gains are taxed at 20%, reducing net returns.

Regular Review of Investments
Periodically evaluate your portfolio's performance.

Assess alignment with changing financial goals and market conditions.

Seek advice from a Certified Financial Planner to optimize your strategy.

Contingency Planning
Build an emergency fund to cover 6-12 months of expenses.

Keep it liquid in instruments like savings accounts or short-term debt funds.

This ensures financial security during unexpected situations.

Additional Recommendations
Avoid direct funds; regular funds through a Certified Financial Planner offer better insights.

Regular funds provide guidance, performance tracking, and informed decision-making.

Diversify further into large-cap or balanced funds if needed for reduced volatility.

Health Insurance and Risk Coverage
Ensure adequate health insurance for you and your family.

Review life insurance to match liabilities and responsibilities.

Separate insurance and investment for better clarity and effectiveness.

Adjusting Contributions
Increase investments as income grows over the next decade.

Regular increments enhance your corpus significantly over time.

Automated increases in SIP amounts can align with inflation and financial growth.

Future Goals and Planning
Define clear financial goals, including retirement, children’s education, and lifestyle.

Allocate funds based on goal timeframes and priorities.

Maintain a balance between aggressive growth and stability.

Final Insights
Your current strategy lays a solid foundation. However, continuous assessment ensures its relevance to future needs. Strengthen your portfolio with diversified investments, consistent reviews, and adjustments to achieve financial independence over the next decade.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jan 14, 2025

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I am doing SIP in QUANT SMALL CAP & MIDCAP since last 2 years. Recently they are involved in front running case and SEBI investigation is going on. My doubt is shall i continue SIP or stop the investment ? I am already having another 5 SIPS in small cap , midcap & flexi cap since last 5 years which are having CAGR of above 15%. If you advice me to stop SIP in QUANT, i will divert this amount in above 5 sips.
Ans: The ongoing SEBI investigation and other highlighted concerns about Quant Mutual Fund raise significant questions. Here is a comprehensive evaluation of whether to continue your SIPs or stop them.

1. Understanding the Current Situation with Quant Mutual Fund
SEBI conducted a search-and-seizure operation, not a routine enquiry.

Quant Mutual Fund clarified that the operation was part of a court-approved investigation.

Changes in leadership, such as the CFO's resignation, have added to investor concerns.

Despite these challenges, the fund house continues to assure full cooperation with SEBI.

2. Performance and Reputation of Quant Mutual Fund
Quant Mutual Fund has shown exceptional growth, with AUMs rising from Rs 233 crore to Rs 94,000 crore in four years.

The fund's small-cap schemes have delivered outstanding performance, often topping the charts.

Critics highlight red flags, including over-reliance on one individual and potential SEBI rule violations.

Momentum-based strategies and concentrated stock holdings raise questions about risk and sustainability.

3. Risks Associated with One-Man Show Management
Investment decisions reportedly rely heavily on Sandeep Tandon, the key figure at Quant.

Lack of a robust team structure and research capacity may pose systemic risks.

A one-person-driven strategy can lead to inconsistent performance in volatile markets.

Inadequate team size and resources could hinder the fund’s ability to address SEBI’s queries effectively.

4. Evaluating Diversification in Your Portfolio
You already have five SIPs in small-cap, mid-cap, and flexi-cap funds performing well with over 15% CAGR.

Diversifying across multiple fund houses reduces exposure to single-entity risks.

Overlapping strategies within the same fund categories may lead to over-concentration.

Reassess your portfolio’s allocation to ensure alignment with your financial goals.

5. Tax Implications of Stopping SIP and Redeeming Investments
If you decide to stop SIPs and redeem investments, consider the tax impact.

LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%, while STCG is taxed at 20%.

Plan redemptions to minimise tax liability and reinvest strategically.

Use a Certified Financial Planner for tax-efficient portfolio adjustments.

6. Alternatives to Quant Funds for SIP Diversion
If you stop SIPs in Quant funds, divert the amount to your existing well-performing funds.

Actively managed funds with strong teams and transparent processes are ideal alternatives.

Ensure new investments align with your risk appetite and financial objectives.

Balance between equity and debt funds for portfolio stability and growth.

7. Impact of SEBI Investigation on Investor Confidence
SEBI’s findings may impact Quant Mutual Fund’s reputation and future performance.

Regulatory actions could introduce stricter compliance measures across the mutual fund industry.

Monitor updates on the investigation and assess its implications for the fund house.

Maintain vigilance about regulatory developments affecting the fund.

8. Importance of Fund House Credibility
A fund house's governance and transparency are critical for investor trust.

Reevaluate investments in funds with potential governance issues.

Choose funds with a strong track record of compliance and ethical practices.

Avoid funds overly dependent on individuals rather than institutional processes.

9. Making a Decision on Quant SIP Continuation
Reasons to Consider Stopping SIPs in Quant Funds:

Regulatory risks due to SEBI investigation.
Over-reliance on a one-man strategy.
Lack of institutional structure and research team.
Reasons to Consider Continuing SIPs in Quant Funds:

Exceptional past performance.
Potential for future returns if the fund overcomes current challenges.
10. Final Insights
The SEBI investigation and governance concerns warrant a cautious approach. If you are uncomfortable with the risks, stopping SIPs and diverting funds to your other well-performing SIPs is prudent. Maintain a diversified and balanced portfolio to safeguard your financial goals. Stay updated on SEBI developments and periodically review your investments with a Certified Financial Planner.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jan 14, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
Money
My father expired recently. His Savings Accounts and FD's all are in nationalized banks. In most of the accounts my mother is nominee. As far as FD is concerned either he has kept my mother as nominee or they are joint holders. In all this banks my mother also has savings account and fds in her name. Kindly advise about the banking procedure. We want to invest my fathers hard earned money. Also flat is owned by my father and mother jointly. Advise about that procedure also. I have one sister and I am married with son. Before dying he has not left any will.
Ans: Losing a loved one is always difficult. Managing financial matters requires careful attention. Below is a detailed plan to handle your father’s accounts and investments.

1. Managing Savings Accounts
Check for nominee details on all savings accounts.

If your mother is the nominee, the process is straightforward.

Submit the following documents to the bank:

Death certificate of your father.
Nominee’s identity proof and address proof.
Bank account details of the nominee for fund transfer.
The bank will verify documents and transfer funds to the nominee’s account.

If no nominee is registered, the bank will request legal heir documents.

A succession certificate may be required.
Apply through the district court for this certificate.
2. Handling Fixed Deposits (FDs)
Joint Holder FDs:
If the FD is jointly held with “either or survivor” clause, your mother can access it directly.
Submit the death certificate and a simple application to continue or withdraw the FD.
Nominee FDs:
If your mother is the nominee, submit her identity proof and the death certificate.
The funds will be transferred to her account.
FDs Without Nominee:
For such cases, the legal heir process will apply.
Obtain a succession certificate for claiming the funds.
3. Managing the Jointly Owned Flat
The flat is jointly owned by your parents.

Your mother automatically inherits your father’s share.

To update ownership records:

Submit your father’s death certificate to the housing society.
Request a name transfer form from the society.
For legal ownership transfer:

Update property records with the sub-registrar’s office.
Submit the death certificate and joint ownership documents.
Discuss with your sister to ensure no future disputes.

4. Creating an Investment Plan for Your Mother
Assessing Current Funds:
Consolidate all proceeds from your father’s accounts and FDs.
Include the savings, FDs, and other assets your mother holds.
Identifying Financial Goals:
Prioritise safety and liquidity for your mother’s needs.
Create provisions for emergencies and regular income.
Suggested Investments:
Invest in a mix of debt and balanced mutual funds for stability.
Include senior citizen savings schemes for guaranteed returns.
Ensure liquidity by keeping some funds in fixed deposits or liquid funds.
5. Family Consent and Legal Safeguards
Discuss all financial matters openly with your sister.

Take written consent from family members before major decisions.

Create a will for your mother to avoid future complications.

Include all assets and their intended distribution in the will.

6. Tax Implications and Planning
Consult a Certified Financial Planner to manage taxes efficiently.

Interest income from FDs and mutual funds will be taxable.

Plan investments under Section 80C and 80D to save tax.

Keep track of long-term and short-term capital gains taxation.

7. Building a Comprehensive Financial Plan
Ensure your mother has adequate health and life insurance.

Set aside emergency funds for unforeseen expenses.

Regularly review investments for optimal performance.

Diversify funds to reduce risks and maintain steady returns.

8. Educating Your Family on Financial Matters
Involve your family in understanding financial procedures.

Teach them the importance of nominations and joint accounts.

Create a list of all assets and liabilities for easy reference.

Share this list with your spouse and trusted family members.

Final Insights
Handling your father’s hard-earned money requires care and responsibility. Following the correct procedures ensures smooth transitions. Create a robust financial plan to protect and grow these funds for your family’s future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jan 14, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
Money
I am 43 years old drawing monthly salary of 3.5 lakhs. I have multiple loans going on for property and the monthly outgo is 2.4 lakhs. Rental income 30k. The loans would end in next 5-6 years. My monthly SIP amount is 34000. Total accumulated amount is 31 lacs. Annual LIC is 80k. Maturity value of LIC is 30 lacs and i policies wud mature in 4 years. My another investment is in TATA AIG life insurance for which annual outgo is 5.5 lacs for next 3 years. I would receive 65 lacs approx after 13 years. Total PF amount is 60 lacs as of now, plan to work till 65. I have term plan of 1.5 cr till 75 yrs. family health insurance of 1cr. I have son aged 12 n daughter 3 . I would need around 1cr for their education and an equal amount for their wedding. I would need a corpus of around 3 to 4 cr for retirement. What should i do to reach this goal. How do i reduce my obligations which this moment seems to be significant.
Ans: At 43, you have significant responsibilities and aspirations. Balancing your current obligations and future goals requires a structured approach. Let us create a plan that helps reduce your financial burden and achieve your long-term goals.

1. Evaluate Current Financial Situation
Your monthly salary is Rs 3.5 lakhs.

Loan EMIs amount to Rs 2.4 lakhs monthly, with 5-6 years remaining.

Rental income of Rs 30,000 offsets some EMIs.

Your SIP amount is Rs 34,000 monthly, and the accumulated corpus is Rs 31 lakhs.

LIC premiums of Rs 80,000 annually will mature in 4 years with Rs 30 lakhs.

TATA AIG life insurance premium is Rs 5.5 lakhs annually for 3 more years.

This policy offers Rs 65 lakhs after 13 years.

Your EPF corpus is Rs 60 lakhs and will grow until retirement.

You have a term insurance plan of Rs 1.5 crore till 75 years.

Family health insurance coverage is Rs 1 crore.

2. Understand Your Financial Goals
Education funds of Rs 1 crore for your children are needed over time.
Wedding expenses of Rs 1 crore are anticipated in the future.
Retirement corpus required is Rs 3-4 crore by age 65.
3. Address High Financial Obligations
Your loans consume 68% of your salary. Prioritise early closure.
Use bonuses or increments to prepay loans.
Focus on high-interest loans first, like personal loans or high-interest EMIs.
Consider restructuring loans for lower EMIs if possible.
4. Optimize Current Investments
LIC Policy:
The annual premium of Rs 80,000 adds to your financial burden.
Surrendering this policy and reinvesting in mutual funds can yield better returns.
Consult with your Certified Financial Planner for the exact process.
TATA AIG Life Insurance:
The annual outgo of Rs 5.5 lakhs is substantial.
Evaluate the policy’s cost-benefit ratio.
Surrender the policy if returns are suboptimal. Redirect funds to mutual funds.
SIP Investment:
Continue your Rs 34,000 monthly SIP.
Diversify across equity, hybrid, and debt mutual funds.
Allocate more to equity funds for long-term goals.
5. Focus on Children’s Education and Wedding Goals
For education, start investing separately in balanced mutual funds.
Target medium-term funds that align with your child’s higher education timelines.
For weddings, allocate funds into conservative equity and hybrid funds.
Review the progress every year to ensure sufficient accumulation.
6. Build Your Retirement Corpus
Your EPF corpus of Rs 60 lakhs will grow significantly by 65.
Supplement EPF with equity SIPs for long-term growth.
Increase SIP contributions gradually as loan EMIs reduce.
Reassess your retirement needs regularly, adjusting for inflation.
7. Ensure Adequate Insurance Coverage
Your term insurance of Rs 1.5 crore is sufficient for family protection.
Maintain your Rs 1 crore health insurance for unforeseen medical expenses.
Avoid ULIPs or endowment plans for insurance; stick to term insurance.
8. Tax Planning for Maximum Savings
Claim deductions under Section 80C for PF, SIPs, and insurance premiums.
Use Section 80D for health insurance premium tax benefits.
Plan investments to reduce tax outgo and boost savings.
9. Monitor and Adjust Investments
Review your portfolio every six months.
Rebalance to maintain the right asset allocation.
Seek advice from a Certified Financial Planner for better decisions.
10. Manage Lifestyle Expenses
Track discretionary expenses to identify areas for savings.
Avoid lifestyle inflation to increase your surplus.
Redirect savings toward investments and loan prepayments.
Finally
Your goals are achievable with disciplined planning. Start reducing obligations and focusing on efficient investments. Take guidance from a Certified Financial Planner to stay on track.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7510 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jan 14, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
Money
Iam 48 year man , no investment yet. I need to start invest 30000 monthly in sip. Please advise.
Ans: You are taking a vital step toward financial stability. Starting SIPs of Rs 30,000 monthly is a great choice. Here's how you can maximise this opportunity:

1. Understand Your Financial Goals
Define your goals clearly.
Split goals into short-term, medium-term, and long-term categories.
For instance, goals may include retirement, children's education, or a contingency fund.
2. Emergency Fund Comes First
Build an emergency fund equal to 6-12 months' expenses.
Keep it in a liquid fund or savings account.
This ensures financial security during unexpected events.
3. Risk Assessment
Assess your risk tolerance based on age, goals, and responsibilities.
As you are 48, balance risk and returns carefully.
Avoid taking excessive risks at this stage of life.
4. Asset Allocation is Key
Allocate funds wisely between equity, debt, and hybrid mutual funds.
Equity mutual funds are ideal for long-term goals like retirement.
Debt funds suit medium-term goals like a child’s education.
Hybrid funds offer balanced growth and safety for moderate goals.
5. Select Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds can outperform index funds in the Indian market.
Fund managers adapt strategies to market conditions.
This flexibility can lead to better returns compared to index funds.
6. Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs)
Invest Rs 30,000 monthly in a mix of equity, debt, and hybrid funds.
SIPs bring financial discipline and reduce market volatility impact.
Long-term SIPs benefit from the power of compounding.
7. Tax Efficiency in Mutual Funds
Equity mutual funds offer lower long-term capital gains (LTCG) tax.
LTCG over Rs 1.25 lakh annually is taxed at 12.5%.
Debt funds are taxed as per your income tax slab.
Choose funds based on your tax bracket and investment horizon.
8. Regular Funds Through a CFP
Invest in regular funds with guidance from a Certified Financial Planner.
CFPs help you choose the right funds based on your goals.
Regular funds come with professional support for better management.
9. Review and Rebalance Portfolio
Review your investments every six months or annually.
Rebalance based on market changes and goal progress.
Adjust allocations to maintain an optimal risk-return balance.
10. Insure Yourself Adequately
Ensure sufficient health and life insurance coverage.
Avoid mixing investment and insurance in one product.
A term insurance policy is ideal for life cover.
11. Retirement Planning is Crucial
Invest in equity funds for long-term retirement goals.
Aim for a corpus that sustains your post-retirement lifestyle.
Consider inflation and rising healthcare costs while planning.
12. Monitor Lifestyle Inflation
Keep lifestyle inflation in check to save more.
Prioritise needs over wants to increase your savings potential.
Focus on financial discipline for a secure future.
13. Avoid Common Pitfalls
Avoid stopping SIPs during market downturns.
Do not withdraw funds prematurely without valid reasons.
Avoid emotional decisions; stick to your plan.
14. Consult a Certified Financial Planner
A CFP ensures you stay aligned with your financial objectives.
They help optimise your portfolio for better returns.
Professional guidance helps you navigate market complexities.
15. Educate Yourself About Investments
Understand the basics of mutual funds and market dynamics.
This knowledge helps you make informed decisions.
Stay updated on economic trends and fund performance.
Finally
Your initiative to invest Rs 30,000 monthly is commendable. Consistency and discipline will bring excellent results. Follow the above steps to build a robust financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |1142 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jan 14, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 14, 2025Hindi
Listen
Career
Maine msc zoology kiya hai teaching line me mujhe jyada pais nahi mil raha hai kya mai computer line jaise jetking se course karke mujhe IT engineer ban sakti hu mujhe jyada salary milegi
Ans: Hello dear.
You completed an M.Sc. (Zoology) and started a career in teaching. Only due to less money/salary, do you wish to change the career option? I think this is not good at an early stage. If the person excels in a subject like Biology then there is no problem with getting a job and a high salary. If you are well aquatinted with computers then you can run online classes for Biology or can join a branded institute where offline along with online coaching is done. To achieve this level, you have to excel in subject knowledge, communication skills, computer skills, and a sound technique to connect with the students to gain success in the teaching field. Now, looking towards your other option for joining other computer courses via any institute at this level is not recommended. To excel in IT, you need at least 5-6 years of strong exposure and need to make very hard efforts for that. It is not sure that you may get a job with a high salary. Rather, you can choose some diploma courses related to A.I. and digital Marketing, etc. where you can start your career with a moderate salary but can reach to your desired level in a short time if you master the skills.

Final suggestion: It is better to search for a job related to M.Sc. (Zoology) other than teaching if not satisfied.

If satisfied, please like and follow me.
If dissatisfied with the reply, please ask again without hesitation.
Thanks.

Radheshyam

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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