Ans: Hello Sanjay Makwana,

It sounds like you're facing challenges in your marriage and family life. It's important to approach these situations with understanding and patience. While I can offer some general guidance, please keep in mind that I am not a licensed therapist or counselor. Here are some suggestions that might help you navigate these issues:

1. Open Communication:
Healthy communication is the foundation of any strong relationship. Make an effort to have open and honest conversations with your wife and family members about your feelings, concerns, and frustrations. Encourage them to share their thoughts as well. Avoid blaming or criticizing and instead focus on expressing your emotions constructively.

2. Seek Professional Help:
If your anger is affecting your relationships and well-being, it might be beneficial to seek guidance from a professional therapist or counselor. They can help you understand the underlying causes of your anger and provide strategies to manage it effectively.

3. Practice Empathy:
Try to put yourself in the shoes of your wife and family members. Understand that everyone has their struggles and challenges. Empathy can help create a more supportive and understanding environment at home.

4. Stress Management:
Anger can sometimes be a result of accumulated stress. Engage in stress-relief activities such as exercise, meditation, deep breathing, or engaging in hobbies that bring you joy. Managing stress can contribute to a more peaceful mindset.

5. Quality Time:
Spend quality time with your wife and family. Engage in activities you all enjoy, and make an effort to create positive memories together. This can strengthen your bond and reduce tension.

6. Patience and Understanding:
Marriage and family life come with their own set of challenges. It's important to remember that relationships require effort, understanding, and patience. Be prepared to work through difficulties together.

7. Focus on Solutions:
Instead of dwelling on the problems, focus on finding solutions. Collaborate with your wife and family members to come up with strategies that address the challenges you're facing.

8. Apologize and Forgive:
If you've had moments of anger or conflicts, don't hesitate to apologize when needed. Apologizing shows that you value the relationship. Similarly, practice forgiveness when others make mistakes. Holding onto grudges can exacerbate tensions.

9. Seek Joyful Moments:
Look for moments of joy and positivity in your daily life. Focusing on the positives can help shift your mindset and contribute to a more harmonious environment at home.

10. Be Patient Regarding Parenthood:
If you and your wife are facing challenges with having children, consider seeking medical advice if you haven't already. Parenthood is a journey that takes time for some couples. It's important to support each other and explore all available options.

Remember, building strong relationships requires effort from all parties involved. If you find that the challenges are overwhelming, seeking professional help is a wise step to take. A licensed therapist or counselor can provide tailored guidance based on your specific circumstances.

Ans: Dear Vikas,
Marriage can become a routine and a chore after a few years and when there are children involved, the couple have little or almost no time for each other. This can have a direct impact on emotions and very little sex drive.
Both of you must invest time in one another to reconnect outside of the bedroom first. This will inevitably help intimacy and rekindle that lost spark!

1. Do little things for one another; gifts and other surprises
2. Offer to take care of the children over weekends where she can get a break (if she is predominantly taking care of the children)
3. Have a family member (grandparents perhaps) take care of the children one weekend a month, so that two of you get time to getaway
4. Help one another rekindle lost hobbies and interests
5. Find an activity that you can do together; cooking, exercising, painting...

The key here is BOND and allow that spark to come back and well, the rest is history...

All the best!

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I am sure that you understand this: She has had an organ transplant which can be a very frightening experience. What she may need is more love, attention and a lot of joy and cheer around her. Don't judge her actions BUT make sure that you fill her space with love and care. I am sure once she realizes that you truly care for her, she will start to feel different and not be angry or upset with you. The fear that she may carry around her surgery will be replaced by that love and care.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: One possibility is communication breakdown. Over time, couples may fall into patterns where they no longer communicate as openly or effectively as they once did. Misunderstandings, unmet expectations, or unspoken feelings can lead to tension and disputes. It’s important to reflect on whether you both are expressing your thoughts and emotions clearly and listening to each other with empathy.

Another potential factor could be unmet needs or changes in individual priorities. As people grow and evolve, their needs, desires, and priorities may shift. If these changes are not acknowledged or discussed, it can create friction. Consider whether you or your wife feel that certain emotional, physical, or practical needs are not being met.

Stress from external factors, such as work, finances, or family issues, can also spill over into the relationship. If either of you is experiencing significant stress, it might contribute to increased irritability or conflict. Identifying these stressors and finding ways to manage them together can be helpful.

Changes in intimacy or connection can also lead to disputes. Emotional or physical intimacy might wane due to various reasons, such as busy schedules, health issues, or unresolved conflicts. It’s important to nurture the bond and find ways to reconnect.

Lastly, unresolved past issues can resurface and cause ongoing disputes. If there are lingering resentments or unresolved conflicts, they might continue to affect the relationship. It’s crucial to address these issues constructively, possibly with the help of a couples counselor if needed.

Reflecting on these areas and having open, honest conversations with your wife can help you both understand the root causes of your disputes. Working together to rebuild communication, connection, and trust can guide you toward a healthier, more harmonious relationship.