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Black magic, depression, and unwanted marriage: Should I live or die?

Anu Krishna |1186 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 08, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more

Question by Nadmeen on Sep 05, 2024Hindi

Hello mam i am 23 and whaen i was 19 i had physical relationship with a guy who done black magic to me and has my photo with him he says he love me and want to marry me but i dont rejected it after that he tell everyone about it now i am totally depressed what should i do whether i live or die

Ans: Dear Nadmeen,
I don't know about black magic BUT I do know that as a girl you need to become stronger. Why would you waste your time and life over a 'loser'?
Surely you deserve better than this guy, yeah? Living in fear that he is going to do something etc may just be your way of protecting them. Be around positive people, focus on your studies and have a goal for the future. Tuning the mind on creation rather than fear helps a lot in changing the way that you feel now.
And most importantly, learn to love yourself. You are your most important person and never waste time on people who don't deserve you.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1186 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 01, 2022

Question by JV - Nov 01, 2022Hindi

Hi Anu I am 30 years old. I have done LLB and was not interested to practice in court so I tried to get a private job but I didn't get any. Then I decided to start preparing for a government job but I missed it. I started to doubt myself. I even had suicidal thoughts this was started when I was very little something happened to me when I was 16 since then I tried to kill myself and also tried to get involved with one of my friends in college. He liked me so much so we started having relationship. When intimacy started I became nervous and afraid. It is like itching. I want to run and hide in a safe place. He was very firm and honest and humble but didn't work out. After that so many proposals came. I declined. Now my family wants me to marry. I don't know if the husband would understand and give me some time to get involved with him. I don’t know what life after marriage would be. I am a girl with absolutely no achievement and am not proud of anything in my life. My parents are disappointed in me but they never show. What should I do? Pls do not disclose this

Ans:

Dear JV,

It’s possibly the incident that happened to you (which I understand that you haven’t shared here) is preventing you from having a fulfilling life.

I can only say that the incident happened in the past, but you are living it even now.

You were a victim in that incident, but to continue to play the victim even now is to give your power away.

How can you be happy by giving your inner power away every day and every moment?

Reclaim your life.

What’s happened can be blurred by moving away from that incident and reminding yourself that you are far away from the past and in the NOW.

Be grateful to what you have in the present
Make a list of your strengths
Write down your goal clearly by stating by when you want to achieve it

Remember bringing your past into the current time robs you of any goodness; professionally or personally.

So, to see something change, change the way you feel about your past.

Step out of the victim mode and become a person who has the power to change things at will.

I am sure you want to see how this pans out for you.

So, what are you waiting for? Step up and bring that newness of thought into your life.
All the best!

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Anu Krishna |1186 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 15, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 10, 2024Hindi

Hi mam, I was in a relationship with a guy for 3 months he was uneducated but I’m a S.E. Initially everything was fine but later he started like u should not talk with other boys you should not go there you should not wear this kind of dress, I’m your husband so you should listen to me whatever I say u should do that like he started. Then he started mentally abused with so many bad words nd he slapped me twice. So I decided I don’t want to be in this relationship so I said him. Then he kept some fellows to follow me to check wat I’m doing where I’m going to get all these details. And then he said I will show both of our to your family, I will kill you like this he started. Now it is almost 2 year I’m leading my life but sometimes he will call me he will threaten me I don’t know what to do how to overcome this I can’t tell to my family I’m depressed can u please tell me what I have to do

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Are you married? Because he said that he is your husband...I am confused...

Anyway, NO, he has no business controlling you this way...Emotional and Physical Abuse is a strict NO NO...
Tell your family and do that NOW!!!!!!!
This man seems to be acting in a violent manner and your safety should be more of a concern...it was 2 slaps, then after that? When you did not protest for that, he simply has got the message that violence is okay with you...
No, it's not okay, right? And that's why you wrote on this platform...

Do the right thing for yourself...Protect yourself from this person first! Threats of killing you did not set off alarm bells? Why are you still letting him off so easy? This is NOT love...he is just a familiar person to you.
Familiarity does not mean Safety!!!!!! (Read this again)...

Involve your family and let him know that you are not alone; he will stop his threats knowing that you will respond to the rubbish he is subjecting you to! Speak with your family...

All the best!
Dear Anonymous,
No, Age is not so important in a marriage; but if it isn't, then why did you hide the fact of your real age? You have givem it that importance enough to hide it, yeah?
And any relationship based on lies or a hidden fact can cause damages...
The only way that I can see is work with the Counselor and appeal to your husband as well. Tell him that your child needs the love of both parents. Hear what he has to say...and yes, he is bound to bring up the age factor over and over again...it is something that he feels cheated with...so, respect it...Like I said, Apologize like you really mean it...

And oh, why are you so bothered about how he will treat other women in his life? Just focus on your life and your marriage...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1186 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 20, 2024Hindi

Hello i'm 30 years old women i'm married with my close relation my mother's brother i like him at my childhood but he loves me more & one day his mother was died then our family decide to our marriage that's why i was married with him but i'm not love him..i have one 4 years baby girl now but in 2 years later i had met one online friend he is very kind to me i fell love with him more & getting more addicted to him i thought him he is my man but i'm alredy more addicted with him he is not married he was told me to get divorce from your husband i will marry you. But i'm getting more confused Thinking of my family what a do? give me some advice how to relive in person addiction he was fight with me for small things & he was not talking with me for some days that time i felt so badly without him even i'm not sleeping & craying for whole night. i'm more craving to speek with him i know i'm totally hacked by him i don't know the way what a do?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Addiction to anything and anyone is never good and online romances can be a huge gamble too...you haven't met this man and you are in love with him and addicted to him?
It seems like a good escape from your marriage, so maybe if you find a way to make your marriage work by connecting better with your husband, things might actually improve for you...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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I am now 52, i have problem correct at 3 am in (night), i cannot control. My part get hard like rod. I haven't made relationship with my wife since 12 years, after she delivered 2 childerns. I cannot control on my sex after 15 days i need. I have one partner but she is not available aways . I want to reduce my sex. what to do.

Ans: Dear Vishwa,
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Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1186 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 04, 2024Hindi

Hello madam I want to be anonymous.i had told you my story and asked for your advice nearly 6 -7 months back from the same email through which I am contacting you.i don't know whether you replied or not.if ever you replied please send it to my email

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
All questions directed towards me will always be answered by me. There is no option of sending the response by email as this platform is a direct interface between readers and the Gurus.
It might be useful for you to check your email for a notification on the response. In case, you still face a challenge, kindly post your question again.

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Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1186 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 02, 2024Hindi

Hi Madam. I am married from last one and half years now, there has been numerous fights in between small and big ones both. In between this time I have become a mother, and, my baby is 7 months old now. My husband does nothing, did nothing in past one and half years. He is only occupied with his work all the time, he goes to office everyday mostly. Right now my baby is 7 months old and from last 7 months me and my parents are taking care of the baby. And, he absolutely shows no understanding when it comes to looking after the baby. Am also a working person. Moreover I pay all the bills when it comes to getting household stuff, paying rent, all the expenses related to baby. He is so shameless that he just doesn’t care too, when I pick these topics or raise concerns about handling the baby he gets abusive. I am not sure what to do now! How insensible can a person get if no one sees my husband would never feel that person like him exist in this world. I feel like filing a divorce petition now. He was the one who wanted to have baby so soon. I was never ready. Now when I have the baby I am the only person along with my parents and sister looking after the baby.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Your husband wants a family without responsibilities and that's why neither is he interested in the baby nor in paying the bills...This is not just insensitivity but lack of emotional immaturity and the unwillingness to take on responsibilities head on...Approach a senior male member within the family who is someone that has been a role model to others in terms executing family responsibilities and is also caring and affectionate. This person can appeal to your husband and talk some sense into him.

If there's no one that fits the bill, the only option is to go to a professional for Couples Therapy. There's a reason why your husband avoids his duties as a husband and father and that needs to be uncovered and sorted out. It will also help the two of bond and connect better. Make this attempt before jumping into divorce; separating is a whole different world that comes with its own set of challenges and with the baby now in the picture, work at the marriage and putting things together.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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