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Kanchan Rai |175 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 01, 2024

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more

Question by Manish on Jan 19, 2024Hindi

we had joint family almost 10 years back, we are two brothers ,mother ,father and 2 children to both brothers, I am elder brother, Problem started almost 5 years , My brother lost his temper and started heated argument and violence in family although he is introvert and hold negative thought since long back ,all family members tried to convince him to keep him positive but issue increased day by day reached to a level when father decided my family to protect and advise us to move out of joint family. afterwards also situation remains the same their and ultimately my parents also moved out of the house. We never had any communication around 2 years , but afterwards father had some critical health issue related to kidney and we informed them, Communication started with them again but father expired and again we have seen their violent face during rituals. We understand he having serious psychiatric issue but non of their family like his wife , Son is cooperating us for medication without his consensus as my brother never thought that he having any issue. I am very much worried that some day something wrong can happen as he is keeping very pity issues in mind and ready to fight always. He relation and neighbor's also he did the same and now no one is in talking terms with him.Please suggest how to handle ,is their any agency who can help us in sorting this issue. dont want to go in legal.

Ans: Hello Manish,
mental health issues can be complex, and professional guidance is crucial. Consult with mental health professionals to create a plan tailored to your family's specific situation. It's important to prioritize the safety and well-being of your family. If your brother's behavior becomes threatening or harmful, it may be necessary to maintain physical and emotional distance while encouraging him to seek help. Look for support groups or organizations that specialize in helping families dealing with mental health issues. They can provide guidance, resources, and a network of people who have faced similar challenges. Consider arranging a family intervention, facilitated by a mental health professional, where you can express your concerns about your brother's behavior and encourage him to seek help. It's important to approach this with empathy and understanding. while you mentioned that you don't want to go the legal route, in extreme cases, you may need to consider legal options like obtaining a court order for involuntary psychiatric evaluation. This should be considered as a last resort and only if your brother poses a serious threat to himself or others.

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Anu Krishna |836 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 12, 2022

Question by JG - Sep 12, 2022Hindi

Dear Anu MadamI have a brother, he is married, 38 years old and his is wife is 34.Since 2 and half years they do not have any physical relationship but they have a 3-year-old child.My brother is also suffering from depression and the cause is failing intimacy between his wife and him. He is not interested in her at all and now applied for divorce. But his wife for the sake of child wants to continue to remain married as child needs both parents for upbringing and refusing to give divorce. We also want to treat his depression for which he is not supportive. This is causing pain in the lives of all family members and his little child.Please suggest what we can do for the wellbeing of all.

Ans: Dear JG,

How can you help someone who possibly doesn’t even realise that he needs help and that he needs it NOW?

Your intent to see him and his family is noble and out of care and concern. But if he is unwilling to recognise (possibly his mental state) that he needs professional help and that it will ease his situation and save his marriage, what is it that you can do?

For the sake of his wife and child, kindly ask an authoritative yet caring elder in the family to drive some sense into him.

Untreated mental condition isn’t a joyful experience for him or those around him.

Also, take him out on long walks in Nature. Nature is known to be very soothing and healing. Maybe it might help calm his nerves and he might seek help.

All the best!

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