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Mother-in-Law and Brother-in-Law Not Paying Rent and Resorting to Emotional Blackmail - What Are My Legal Options?

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |358 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 23, 2024

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jul 23, 2024Hindi
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Hi, I have given my 2bhk family to my mother in law and brother in law. Over past few years they pay less rent 40% of market value rent. from oct 2023 brother in law lost job and he also has housing emi for 21L+ 3L personal loan. He is also not giving any rent also because of the.current situation. Now he is resorting to emotional black mail and citing senior citizen act stating daughter is liable to pay for living expenses. Already the current house they are staying can get 18K rent.We tried to arrange interview for his job but looks like he is not interested and he seems to be pshyco logical disturbed and talking all non sense. My mother in law is playing neutral role and saying yes to both side without taking a correct stand. My brother in-law is two divorce with history of drinking and physiological mental problems as stated by their ex-spouse.My ask 1. What are legal options available for me. 2. We want him to vacate our house and move to his own house or 1 bhk so that we can help with money from my 2bhk rent. 3. If nothing works can we make a first move of filing police compliant which I want as a last resort.

Ans: Firstly, seeking legal advice is crucial. A lawyer who specializes in property and family law can provide you with specific guidance based on your situation. They can review any rental agreements and help you understand the implications of the Senior Citizens Act that your brother-in-law is citing. This legal counsel will be invaluable in navigating the complexities of your situation.

Next, you might need to issue a formal notice to your brother-in-law and mother-in-law, requesting them to vacate the property. This notice should clearly articulate the reasons for your request, including the financial burden their reduced rent and non-payment are causing you. Provide them with a reasonable timeframe to find alternative accommodation, whether in his own house or a more affordable 1BHK apartment. This approach shows your willingness to support them while also addressing your legitimate concerns.

It's also important to communicate directly and openly with your mother-in-law. Her neutral stance may be contributing to the tension, and having a candid conversation about the situation's impact on your family could help her understand the need for a resolution. Explain the financial strain and the efforts you’ve made to assist your brother-in-law in finding employment. Her support could be pivotal in encouraging him to take more responsibility and action.

If these steps do not lead to a satisfactory resolution, you may have to consider involving the authorities. Filing a police complaint should be a last resort, but it is an option if your brother-in-law’s behavior becomes unmanageable or if he refuses to vacate the property despite all reasonable efforts. The aim here is to protect your family’s financial and emotional well-being while ensuring that your legal rights are upheld.

Throughout this process, it's essential to prioritize your mental health and well-being. Dealing with family conflicts can be emotionally draining, and seeking support from friends, a counselor, or a support group can provide you with the strength and perspective needed to handle these challenges effectively.

By taking these steps, you aim to find a balance between supporting your in-laws and protecting your own family’s interests. Remember, it’s important to act with compassion but also with a clear understanding of your rights and the need for fairness in this situation.

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Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 24, 2023

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Recently my elder brother has expired. His wife since after marriage has never shown in interest to behave well with my brother nor with my father, mother and me. More of she like to enjoy life, flirting. Since my brother nature was very soft, he never fighted with her on this and she has kept him under her control. She has one 7 year kid and she doesn't care at all about him. My mother and father are taking care of the kid. In such situations l, my father has transferred the house on my name and other finances stuff as well. Since my brother expired, she is now forcing my father to give her house. Nd my father is not willing to give her and want her to leave house. And send the kid to boarding school as he knows that she will ruined the kid life. Pls suggest how we can make her go away from our house and also make the kid future arrnagement.
Ans: I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your brother and the difficult situation you are facing. It's important to handle the situation with sensitivity and compassion, especially for the child involved.

Firstly, it's important to consider the legal aspects of the property transfer and ensure that everything is in order. You may want to consult with a lawyer or legal professional to understand your options and any legal implications of the situation.

In terms of making her leave the house, it's important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding, while also being firm about your boundaries. It may be helpful to have a family meeting to discuss the situation and come up with a plan together. You could suggest alternative housing options for her and the child, or offer to help her find a new place to live.

Regarding the child's future, it's important to prioritize their well-being and ensure that they are provided with a stable and nurturing environment. You may want to consider options such as counseling for the child, or exploring alternative living arrangements that would be in the best interest of the child.

It's also important to approach the situation with compassion and empathy for your brother's wife, even if her behavior has been difficult to deal with. Grief can manifest in different ways, and it's possible that she may be struggling with her own emotions and feelings of loss.

In any case, it may be helpful to seek the guidance of a therapist or counselor who can help you navigate the complexities of the situation and provide support to all involved.

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6508 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 19, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 19, 2024Hindi
Money
Hi, sorry it's a very long post My mother is 60year old homemaker(nil income) and father is 68yr old retired govt employee (recieving pension).we are 3 children [2 daughters ( all aged between 30-40yr)]to our parents.All of us are married and earning for our livelihood. We sisters are contributing to parents health insurance and other financial things since we started earning and even after marriage ( as my father is an alcoholic too not looking after the household well).Mother has a property in her name given to her by her father as a gift deed. Father had one house and a plot in his name and some ancestral property. Brother went to abroad for studies in 2018 and came back in 2020. He had a girlfriend since his college days( he married to her in 2022, never had objection from anyone of family members ). Since his arrival, he and his girlfriend started involving in all financial matters of my maternal house to the extent he was using my father's debit card for his own use( father says he has given card to brother willfully). Brother wanted to construct a commercial building in my mother's property. He and my father started threatening my mother to register her property ( actually located near Brother's girlfriend house) in name of brother saying if she doesn't agree ,they won't marry off my sister( who got married in 2022 in the presence of grandparents, mother and myself and both my father and brother didn't attend the marriage). They even extracted money from mother's account (which was given now and then to her by me and my sister).During all these process even brother's girlfriend ( wanted a source of income by renting my parents house)also started abusing my mother and involved in all financial matters ( that freedom was given to her by father and brother as my mother was suppressed and we sisters were not aware of things going on). Everything led to the abandonment of my mother who stayed in her friend's place then I brought her to my house. Now after 3 years ( during the course our wellwishers tried counselling and mediation between my father, brother and mother without sisters which didn't work out). my brother got my parents house( and a plot which was in my father's name) registered to his name as a gift deed from my father without informing mother. All the documents of the property gift deeded to my mother by her father is with my brother and father. They are threatening my mother if she enters her own property. Now my mother has no place and income though she had contributed extensively to upliftment of the family all over these years. She ran a grocery store for 15years during which one plot was bought and house was built in that. Another plot was bought after my parents marriage with the help of dowry money given to my father ) but all the properties were registered in my father's name. She has her contribution financially, emotionally and physically. Now doesn't my mother has right to ask back the house and the property given to my brother without her knowledge and to ask for maintenance from my father and also sue all three of them for mental and physical torture..? We sisters want her to lead a peaceful life in her final years of her life.. please guide us.
Ans: Evaluating Your Mother’s Rights

Your mother has been through a lot. Let's explore her legal and financial rights. She deserves to live peacefully in her final years.

Legal Rights Over Property

Your mother owns property gifted by her father. She has full rights over this property. The property can’t be taken without her consent. If your brother and father took documents, this is illegal.

Action Steps for Property

Retrieve Documents: Seek legal help to get back property documents.
Consult a Lawyer: Discuss the possibility of reclaiming the property.
File a Complaint: If threatened, your mother can file a police complaint.
Maintenance from Your Father

Your father has a duty to support your mother. She can claim maintenance from him. This can be done through legal channels.

Action Steps for Maintenance

Seek Legal Advice: A lawyer can help your mother file for maintenance.
Family Court: File a petition in family court for maintenance.
Right to Ancestral Property

Your mother contributed to the family. She can claim a share in ancestral property. The law supports her right to ancestral property.

Action Steps for Ancestral Property

Legal Consultation: Discuss the possibility of claiming ancestral property.
File a Suit: If needed, file a suit for partition of ancestral property.
Mental and Physical Torture

Your mother faced mental and physical torture. This is a serious issue. She can seek legal action against your brother, father, and sister-in-law.

Action Steps for Torture

File a Complaint: Lodge a complaint with the police for harassment.
Protection Orders: Seek protection orders from the court.
Health Insurance and Financial Support

You and your sister have supported your parents. Continue to ensure health insurance coverage. Your mother may need financial support until her rights are restored.

Action Steps for Financial Support

Joint Efforts: Continue supporting your mother financially.
Plan for Future: Set up a fund for your mother’s needs.
Investments for Secure Future

Consider investing in mutual funds for your mother’s secure future. Regular funds with the help of a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) are beneficial. Avoid direct funds due to lack of professional advice.

Benefits of Regular Funds

Professional Management: CFPs manage the funds, ensuring optimal returns.
Less Hassle: No need for your mother to manage investments actively.
Tailored Advice: Investments tailored to her risk profile and needs.
Regular Review of Investments

Regularly review investments with a CFP. Adjust them based on your mother’s needs and market conditions. This ensures her financial security.

Final Insights

Your mother has rights over her property. She can claim maintenance from your father and her share in ancestral property. Legal action can be taken for mental and physical torture. Continue supporting her financially and ensure her health insurance coverage. Invest wisely with professional advice for her secure future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Latest Questions
Anu

Anu Krishna  |1186 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 02, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi Madam. I am married from last one and half years now, there has been numerous fights in between small and big ones both. In between this time I have become a mother, and, my baby is 7 months old now. My husband does nothing, did nothing in past one and half years. He is only occupied with his work all the time, he goes to office everyday mostly. Right now my baby is 7 months old and from last 7 months me and my parents are taking care of the baby. And, he absolutely shows no understanding when it comes to looking after the baby. Am also a working person. Moreover I pay all the bills when it comes to getting household stuff, paying rent, all the expenses related to baby. He is so shameless that he just doesn’t care too, when I pick these topics or raise concerns about handling the baby he gets abusive. I am not sure what to do now! How insensible can a person get if no one sees my husband would never feel that person like him exist in this world. I feel like filing a divorce petition now. He was the one who wanted to have baby so soon. I was never ready. Now when I have the baby I am the only person along with my parents and sister looking after the baby.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Your husband wants a family without responsibilities and that's why neither is he interested in the baby nor in paying the bills...This is not just insensitivity but lack of emotional immaturity and the unwillingness to take on responsibilities head on...Approach a senior male member within the family who is someone that has been a role model to others in terms executing family responsibilities and is also caring and affectionate. This person can appeal to your husband and talk some sense into him.

If there's no one that fits the bill, the only option is to go to a professional for Couples Therapy. There's a reason why your husband avoids his duties as a husband and father and that needs to be uncovered and sorted out. It will also help the two of bond and connect better. Make this attempt before jumping into divorce; separating is a whole different world that comes with its own set of challenges and with the baby now in the picture, work at the marriage and putting things together.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

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