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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1604 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 16, 2023

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Nov 04, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

Dear expert, I am married for last almost 12 years and having a son. It is an arranged marriage. Before getting married, I was informed by my wife's relatives (uncles, aunts, wife's brothers, sister etc) that they do not have any relations with her husband as he had abandoned his kids (post-death of her wife and got re-married without family consent). After almost 4 years of our marriage, my wife and her relatives accepted him. Now, my wife has left my house leaving (third time) me and my son but, ready to return with the condition that I and my family MUST accept her father in our life and house else she would not return (emotional blackmailing!). She is planning to forcefully bring her uncles, father and other relatives for a discussion at my home. There is no doubt that I will entertain them or discuss anything with them as her father had abused my entire family in the past. In turn, I have searched a rented house and will shift without any fights with anyone. Am I heading a right direction?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
family feuds can really break a marriage.
Ask yourself: What is more important to me?
Is it my marriage or the battle that I need to have with my wife's family?

You mostly likely will say: Marriage!
I agree that they have been unreasonable (especially with your wife walking out) but how you deal with people acting unreasonable is countering it with a lot of sensible patience. No decisions made on a whim or on an impulse, but well-thought out and rational thinking is what will help at this time. Someone has to act responsibly and I ask that person to be YOU!
So, it's not about fights etc, shift to the rented house not as an emotional decision but think about using that to make a statement. Your wife also needs to understand that she cannot act irresponsibly and not think about how it impacts your child.

Seek out the help of elders in your family as well since your wife's family is a huge force now. This is not to fight but for the elders to appeal at their level and get things smoothened out. This can pave a way to you and your wife having a chance to straighten things out within your marriage as well.

All the best!

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1604 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 12, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 06, 2023Hindi
Relationship
Dear Anu I am a 46 year old man .. married for last 16 years... My wife is well educated but a house wife by choice.. I lost my father when i was 18 and had struggled a lot to gain a great life in terms of money, name in my field and satisfaction at work. At home front we live a nuclear family... me, my wife and my 12 year daughter. But after my marriage in 2006 for next 6/7 years we were in joint family. my daughter was born in 2010.. In joint family me, my younger brother his wife and my mother were members... during these years, my wife never got along with my mother, brother and his wife... and also had fights [severe kind] where she accused them for petty reason...she demanded separate house within 3 month of marriage.. but since I was not financially settled so I promised her we will buy own home in course of time... but over these 6&7 years her behavior started really erratic.. she stopped talking to everyone, and keep fighting with all my family. also the house with joint family owned my me and younger brother... she demanded i should sell the house and get my share to buy own house. which i refused as my brother and his family with my mother were also staying there... and while buying it my mother had helped us financially, without having her name as owner. over the period things became really bitter... we also had fights where out of anger I happened to slap her.. but as promised I bought another house [with lot of efforts since i m self employee] within 5/6 years and we shifted to another city around our previous house. but after shifting she had the same temperament. She never got along with me.. Over an argument she would stop talking to me, and when confronted she would mention about my share in old house which i left... she was not happy seeing my brother living in that house with his family and my mother... i told her as promised we bought this house and I haven't withdrew my share in that house.. may be over the year i will take my share as per market value.. but at this point we don't need to do it.. since it will involve a lot of turbulence for my brother, his family and my mother as they were settled there. so I strongly told her she should not think about as she have her house and focus on it. Over these time, we had a very cute daughter... growing.. her schooling started.. i got busy with my work... and my wife by choice chose to be house wife... taking care of house... but she was hell bent on the house issue over selling it and taking my share.. and due to that we had several fights... which became my life miserable. her point was why pay EMI when you can get share and pay off the loans for new house. in these 8/9 years she became bitter person... no ties with my relatives /cousins, no friends, never got along with neighbors... and opposite to that i have very cordial relation with her family, cousins, my family and have great social circle. when my daughter was 10 year old, i was already settled with good career and financial status... i had cleared all the home loan for our new home... i did everything all out to make her happier but her wish to sell that house where my brother with his wife and my mother i didn't take share or sell it.. and she keeps nagging me with that and her temperament getting worst... now she started accusing me for having an affair and threatening me that she will complain police if i argue with her. unfortunately my daughter had to see this... but my daughter is very sorted, focused and a good kid. In last 2 years i managed to buy another house, which is bigger, where we shifted 1.5 years back, she wanted to do a puja and refused to invite anyone from my family.. also bought one more house as investment.. and a farm too as second home... Im very happy and satisfied with my career and other aspects of life... but the bitterness of wife kept on increasing... sometimes i felt she wanted me to fail and she could just take the pleasure of making me feel how she was right.. which never happened.. Now she is completely out of touch with my family... her anger triggers when i speak to my brother , my mom, Now over these years my brother also managed to earn some money and he paid me an amount as part of my share for the house he is living.. which we mutually agreed among us... and i withdrew my name from that property... i informed this to my wife.. first she didnt believe.. and then she was not interested in it.. so basically over these years i managed to fulfil everything what i promised also took my share from the joint house even i was not very happy with that situation. but all these incidences.. my wife became a difficult person to deal with... be it talking a simple conversation or smallest issue.. we don't have any physical relation .... we sleep in different bedrooms.. my wife also became too possessive and control freak with my daughter.. my daughter is 12 now and she retaliate with it.. so even they keep fighting now... me and my daughter have a great bonding... over these period i started feeling that i married a wrong person.. sometimes i think of divorce but i m worried about my daughter.. and also lot other things as im 45 already.. i wont say that i have never done any mistake while these 16 years but i never chose to disconnect with my wife... i worked really hard to earn money to build a good fortune for my wife and daughter... but looks like she doesn't care... and she takes me completely for granted... she thinks i wont leave her and will be stuck around.. i also advised to visit a therapist or counselor... or join a meditation or do anything she likes to do... be it creative or extra curricular.. but she just ignores it... i am into creative field and this domestic chaos sometimes really bothers me. it never effected my work yet but i m worried it might just. Let me know your opinion... if there is something i can do more to help this mess with my wife.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Clearly your wife has a streak of wanting people to want her, literally where it comes off as her being possessive of them (I gather this from what you have shared). I only have a one-sided view and don't know fully well why your wife chooses to be possessive.
She does not want to share you or what you earn with your family; it only suggests that she is worried about losing both. It may seem like they are unfounded fears but they exist in real for her.
Obviously your pleas to see a counselor will better her life and it is easier to stay where she is as nothing needs to change. It seems relatively clear that she fears LOSING!
How this got there or did it become even more evident because of the tussles between your family and her; no one knows. You would not completely know what transpired between your wife and your family; but something has triggered within her to hold on to her beliefs.
Anyway, it is difficult to be where you are; but the only way out is to have a person that is neutral to handle this. It could be a mutual friend, a senior member of her side of the family, a person that she idolizes...anyone who can in a very unbiased manner approach the situation and bring out the fears.
In the meantime, you can spend more time with your daughter and give her a sense of protection and care and at the same time ensuring that she empathizes with her mother. Matters like these can go sour overnight and YES, you have held on so long, give it some more time but do facilitate the neutral person to do an Intervention ASAP.

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1604 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 11, 2023

Relationship
**JAY*JAGANNATH**, Wishing You For **HAPPY*JANMASHTAMI**, I'm based in Mumbai, but lives in Puri, Odisha, because of **LORD*JAGANNATHA**, Since, I'm a Business Analyst,, not yet Started my Practice,, i had a arrange marriage in my own caste with rest was OK, after reading some of Your advises and type of case,, i became enthusiast to know about my personal disturbances in my family. We live Seperate with my Only 18+Son, Studing & Preparing for Entrance Test via Online.., she is in Guwahati,, working under at a Private Retail Management co., ME & MY FAMILY Severally attempted & requested her and her family too, to Come back & Join to my family for living together,, but when failed,, i encourage her OK live there,, as because after failing an attempt of school transfer due to language issue for a subject like Marathi in Upper classes,, Thus, i stopped disturbing her as well as my son's study. During initial level of Separation,, their family (ELDERS) requested me will handover my family (wife & Son),, if i Pay them(wife& Son) their expenses for a Full Year., that was happened when i reached for an attempt to Convince My Wife and their family to adjoin with me & with my family activity, that was Probably in 2010-11 somewhere in between,, i was Hr. Manager in a Cement Co. in Meghalaya. I agreed too & and Provide as per for a Year. But, while passing a year they became Silent.., not hardcovered my family. till as on date,, i am alone..! She & Elder Sister & the brother-in-law Says they won't divorce nor will allow to handover,, i said why..! The Starting of a Quarrel was with a Issue of Changing my Mental Perception,, while they tried to Implement me with Saying a FALSE PLAN,, but, i Caught their Such Attempt,, MY Mrs. later She admitted that, they tried it because of if I get my Changes in me & to take my decision well for my Next career. Since, i born & brought up in Guwahati, i had a Soft corner for North-East always,, which was happened after 15yrs of long Struggle in Mumbai,, i Stand on my own feet with My Own Struggle & a house for my Stability etc. After Marriage of a Assam Lady only it was a Scope again to Reach Assam.. So, i thought, if i can Start Something a great Project with in & around of North-East. But, that became a bad experience for me as on till. I arrived Recently too, to Convince her,, Come & Join me,, Rest all Hurdle i will Handle,, Now, No more My father also expired, a Retired. Rly Officer,, Parents too visited Severally Assam to Convince them but failed,, I always feel i am alone,, what to do with,, I am a family Oriented Person,, love to keep Relation Well with either Side Well. But, not happening. What to Do Now,, Kindly tell Your Opinion on this,, I am Ready to Take Your Nobly too, Recently, I took little advise from a Legal Family Court Councillor at Guwahati, & their one of Next Door Reputed Lady Neighbour(Who Co-ordinated & Represent too for the Local area of their & for their Constituency during Elections & their any function of their Locality,, a well known in their Locality for a Good behaviour too),, I meet & Spoke to her Severally,, She herself Visited too & found My Wife Not behaving Normally & Cool,, a Raugh behaved Lady, She found & She Said, a disrespected Lady means not Gentle,, i Personally Visited Mumbai at her elder Sister's home too,, during yr.2015,, while in entrance,, the brother-in-law resisted me NOT to Enter,, from the door only i came back. Not meet even & had NO Talk,, while after little a distance i covered from their residence,, i found they again recalling me to Come & Visit. But, I found myself very off mooded, & not visited till as on & till date,, because. they only Created the False Nuisances' with their Plan,, which not became A Success.. they Caught. But, they were Proposer of Our both Relation. But, I want a Justice with this,, Since, I am a Simple & Honest,, Very Straight forwarded with Cut to throat Person..in my Nature,, Soft & Spiritual. Since, Many Years Now Connected to Krishna Consciousness too,, that is why for love & affection i am here at PURI. Kindly, Let me Know Your Precious Opinion by which I can Come out with my Loneliness. **HARE*KRISHNA** Thanking you, With Regards, Surajit Bhattacharjee, In Case if You have a Plan to Visit Puri, Odisha,, Kindly, Let me Know Your Date & Place to See **MAHABAHU**JAGANNATHA*,, You may Send by Your family & friends too with Prior Advance & info.
Ans: Dear Surajit,
Thank you for the festive wishes and thank you for the invite to visit Odisha.

Your situations suggests that much time has passed with no action. Long distance relationships are not easy and require immense maturity and agreement and a lot of trust to keep the marriage going.

What is the reason that your wife does not want to come back now? Your son is already 18 years and is old enough to get into a professional college now...What has happened in all these years that she finds it better living with her side of the better than making her own family come together?

Have the two of you had time to have a private conversation without the interference from anyone else?
Make that honest attempt and appeal to her that you would like the family to get back together. But also be prepared if she says NO as that has been her stance all these years... then please move on...it is difficult but will be better for your physical and mental health.

All the best!

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |587 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 30, 2023

Relationship
**JAY*JAGANNATH**, Wishing You For **HAPPY*ANANT-CHATURDASHI**, I'm based in Mumbai, but lives in Puri, Odisha, because of **LORD*JAGANNATHA**, Since, I'm a Business Analyst,, not yet Started my Practice,, i had a arrange marriage in my own caste with rest was OK, after reading some of Your advises and type of case,, i became enthusiast to know YOUR UNPARALELED PRECIOUS OPINION about my personal disturbances in my family.,for which We live Separate with my Only 18+Son, Studying & Preparing for his Entrance Test via Online.., she is in Guwahati,, working under at a Private Retail Management co., ME & MY FAMILY Severally attempted & requested her and her family too, to Come back & Join to my family for living together,, but when failed,, i encourage her OK live there,, as because after failing an attempt of school transfer due to language issue for a subject like Marathi in Upper classes,, Thus, i stopped disturbing her as well as my son's study. During initial level of Separation,, their family (ELDERS) requested me will handover my family (wife & Son),, if i Pay them(wife& Son) their expenses for a Full Year., that was happened when i reached for an attempt to Convince My Wife and their family to adjoin with me & with my family activity, that was Probably in 2010-11 somewhere in between,, i was Hr. Manager in a Cement Co. in Meghalaya. I agreed too & and Provide as per for a Year. But, while passing a year they became Silent.., not hardcovered my family. till as on date,, i am alone..! She & Elder Sister & the brother-in-law Says they won't divorce nor will allow to handover,, i said why..! The Starting of a Quarrel was with a Issue of Changing my Mental Perception,, while they tried to Implement me with Saying a FALSE PLAN,, but, i Caught their Such Attempt,, MY Mrs. later She admitted that, they tried it because of if I get my Changes in me & to take my decision well for my Next career. Since, i born & brought up in Guwahati, i had a Soft corner for North-East always,, which was happened after 15yrs of long Struggle in Mumbai,, i Stand on my own feet with My Own Struggle & a house for my Stability etc. After Marriage of a Assam Lady only it was a Scope again to Reach Assam.. So, i thought, if i can Start Something a great Project with in & around of North-East. But, that became a bad experience for me as on till. I arrived Recently too, to Convince her,, Come & Join me,, Rest all Hurdle i will Handle,, Now, No more My father also expired, a Retired. Rly Officer,, Parents too visited Severally Assam to Convince them but failed,, I always feel i am alone,, what to do with,, I am a family Oriented Person,, love to keep Relation Well with either Side Well. But, not happening. What to Do Now,, But, I LOVER HER & MY SON VERY MUCH,, BY ANY MEANS AS ON.., I HAVE NO PLAN TO LEAVE THEM ALONE & THEIR STRUGGLE TO..! BUT, I STILL, A HELPLESS, WHOM TO GO & CRY FOR THEM..!?! Kindly tell Your PRECIOUS Opinion on this,, I am Ready to Take Your Nobly too, Recently, I took little advise from a Legal Family Court Councillor at Guwahati, & their one of Next Door Reputed Lady Neighbour(Who Co-ordinated & Represent too for the Local area of their & for their Constituency during Elections & their any function of their Locality,, a well known in their Locality for a Good behaviour too),, I meet & Spoke to her Severally,, She herself Visited too & found My Wife Not behaving Normally & Cool,, a Raugh behaved Lady, She found & She Said, a disrespected Lady means not Gentle,, i Personally Visited Mumbai at her elder Sister's home too,, during yr.2015,, while in entrance,, the brother-in-law resisted me NOT to Enter,, from the door only i came back. Not meet even & had NO Talk,, while after little a distance i covered from their residence,, i found they again recalling me to Come & Visit. But, I found myself very off mooded, & not visited till as on & till date,, because. they only Created the False Nuisances' with their Plan,, which not became A Success.. they Caught. But, they were Proposer of Our both Relation. But, I want a Justice with this,, Since, I am a Simple & Honest,, Very Straight forwarded with Cut to throat Person..in my Nature,, Soft & Spiritual. Since, Many Years Now Connected to Krishna Consciousness too,, that is why for love & affection i am here at PURI. Kindly, Let me Know Your Precious Opinion by which I can Come out with my Loneliness. **HARE*KRISHNA** Thanking you, With Regards, Surajit Bhattacharjee, In Case if You have a Plan to Visit Puri, Odisha,, Kindly, Let me Know Your Date & Place to See **MAHABAHU**JAGANNATHA*,, You may Send by Your family & friends too with Prior Advance & info.
Ans: I understand that you are going through a very challenging and emotionally taxing situation. It's clear that you care deeply for your wife and son and want to find a resolution to the issues that have led to your separation. However, I am not a legal expert, and my responses are not a substitute for legal advice. It's essential to consult with an attorney who specializes in family law in your jurisdiction for guidance tailored to your specific circumstances.

Here are some general steps you might consider taking:

Consult with a Family Law Attorney: Seek the advice of a qualified family law attorney in your area who can help you navigate the legal aspects of your situation. They can provide guidance on divorce, custody, and any other legal matters that may arise.
Mediation: Mediation is often a more amicable and less adversarial way to resolve conflicts related to divorce and separation. A trained mediator can help facilitate discussions between you and your wife to find mutually agreeable solutions.
Child Custody and Support: Given your son's involvement, it's crucial to ensure that his best interests are protected. Discuss child custody, visitation, and child support arrangements with your attorney and potentially through mediation.
Therapeutic Intervention: If communication and emotional issues are at the core of your problems, consider involving a family therapist or counselor. They can help facilitate productive discussions and address underlying emotional concerns.
Keep Records: Document any interactions or communication you have with your wife or her family. This can be useful in legal proceedings and may help support your case.
Stay Connected with Your Son: Continue to provide emotional support and be involved in your son's life as much as possible, even if you are physically separated.
Explore Community Resources: Look for local support groups or community resources that can provide emotional support and guidance during this challenging time.
Remember that every situation is unique, and the best course of action may vary depending on the specific details of your case. Seeking professional legal and therapeutic guidance is crucial in navigating complex family issues. Additionally, it's important to remain patient and persistent in your efforts to find a resolution while prioritizing the well-being of your son throughout the process.

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Love Guru

Love Guru   |204 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 04, 2023Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Dear expert, I am married for last almost 12 years and having a son. It is an arranged marriage. Before getting married, I was informed by my wife's relatives (uncles, aunts, wife's brothers, sister etc) that they do not have any relations with her FATHER as he had abandoned his kids (post-death of her wife and got re-married without family consent). After almost 4 years of our marriage, my wife and her relatives accepted him. Now, my wife has left my house leaving (third time) me and my son but, ready to return with the condition that I and my family MUST accept her father in our life and house else she would not return (emotional blackmailing!). She is planning to forcefully bring her uncles, father and other relatives for a discussion at my home. There is no doubt that I will entertain them or discuss anything with them as her father had abused my entire family in the past. In turn, I have searched a rented house and will shift without any fights with anyone. Am I heading a right direction?
Ans: He is her father. To maintain relations with him or not should be her prerogative, not yours. I can understand that he may have wronged you in the past, but maybe he wants to make amends. Shouldn’t he be allowed an opportunity to do so? Would you cut all ties with your parents at the behest of your wife? I don’t think so. Family ties can be complicated; be the bigger man here, and accept harmony. You don’t have to become his best friend, just be civil and extend the courtesy he deserves as your wife’s father. Your job is to support her, not make life difficult for her. It sounds like she has been through a lot as a child.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8493 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 22, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 18, 2025
Money
I about to take 65lakhs home loan for ROI 8.5%. The EMI is coming 56.6K per month. Along with this, I am investing 20k in mutual fund. What are the consequences burden less steps to mitigate the financial crisis. Suggest me wise steps to prevent any unexpected problems on financing.
Ans: You are showing good financial planning by thinking before taking a big home loan. Taking Rs. 65 lakh loan at 8.5% interest is a major step. You also invest Rs. 20,000 in mutual funds monthly. That is a positive sign. Let's now explore the risks and solutions from a 360-degree view.

We will go point-by-point to make things easier.

Understand Your Financial Commitments Clearly

EMI of Rs. 56,600 is a fixed long-term obligation.

Mutual fund SIP of Rs. 20,000 is your wealth-building investment.

Together, Rs. 76,600 is going out monthly from your income.

That’s a big amount. You must assess if your income can handle it.

Also check if your job or business income is stable every month.

Build a Strong Emergency Fund First

Emergency fund is your first safety layer.

Keep at least 6–9 months’ of EMI + SIP in one savings instrument.

That means at least Rs. 5.5 lakhs in liquid savings or short deposits.

This will protect you from salary delays or job loss.

Do not invest emergency fund in equity or long-term products.

Don’t Increase EMI Just Because Bank Allows

Banks approve loans based on maximum eligibility.

That doesn’t mean you should take the highest EMI possible.

You must take EMI within 35–40% of your take-home income.

If EMI goes above 50% of income, you may feel pressure later.

Keep room for lifestyle, children’s needs, and medical needs.

Continue SIP Only If Basic Needs Are Covered

Your Rs. 20,000 SIP should not affect your daily cash flow.

If monthly budget is getting tight, reduce SIP for few months.

You can restart or increase SIP later when income improves.

Stopping SIP completely is not wise unless it’s a financial crisis.

Keep a Buffer Fund for Home Maintenance

Home ownership is not just EMI.

Repairs, painting, society charges, taxes are extra costs.

Keep a separate fund of Rs. 1–2 lakhs for home-related expenses.

Don’t use this fund for vacation or festivals.

Have Life and Health Insurance in Place

Before EMI starts, take term insurance to cover home loan.

Insurance should be 15–20 times of your annual income.

If you pass away, family should not suffer under EMI burden.

Also take health insurance for all family members.

Hospital expenses can disturb loan repayment if uninsured.

Don’t Rely on Property for Future Return

Never see real estate as investment to grow money.

Home should be bought only if you plan to stay in it.

Future property prices are uncertain.

EMI should be based on living need, not resale hope.

Review Loan Terms Carefully

Fixed rate or floating rate can impact your EMI later.

Floating rate changes with RBI decisions.

Check if your EMI will rise if rate goes from 8.5% to 10%.

Plan for higher EMI possibility from beginning.

Don’t Depend Only on Salary for EMI

Try to have secondary income.

This can be spouse’s income, rent, or part-time work.

This reduces pressure on main income.

Helps in EMI and SIP continuation even if income drops.

Track Your CIBIL Score Regularly

Loan repayment will impact your CIBIL score.

Keep EMI auto-debit active from account.

Never delay even a single EMI.

Keep credit card bills paid before due date.

Good credit score helps in future loan top-ups or balance transfer.

Avoid Taking New Loans While Paying Home Loan

Don’t take car loan, consumer loan, or credit card EMI now.

These loans reduce your repayment ability.

Also increase your total EMI percentage against income.

Stay debt-free except for home loan.

Revisit Mutual Fund Strategy with Expert

SIP is good. But review fund types with certified financial planner.

Avoid index funds or direct funds if investing without guidance.

Direct funds give no support or rebalancing help.

Regular funds with MFD and CFP give advice and timely review.

Actively managed funds offer flexibility in market ups and downs.

Plan for Prepayment, But Don’t Rush

Once you have emergency fund and insurance, think of loan prepayment.

Don’t prepay using all your savings.

Prepay only from bonus, surplus, or extra income.

Avoid selling mutual funds for loan prepayment.

Let mutual funds compound wealth in long term.

Check Tax Benefits, But Don’t Depend on Them

Home loan gives tax benefit on interest and principal.

But don’t take loan only for tax saving.

Tax laws can change anytime.

Focus on affordability, not deduction.

Maintain Budget Sheet Every Month

Keep monthly record of income and expenses.

Track EMI, SIP, groceries, utilities, kids’ school fees.

Watch out for overspending on lifestyle.

Adjust SIP or expenses if needed, but never EMI.

Avoid Financial Panic

Don’t panic if one month goes tight.

Use emergency fund calmly.

Don’t use credit card to pay EMI.

Don’t break long-term investments for short-term problems.

Educate Family Members Too

Make your spouse or family aware of EMI and financial plan.

Keep joint account for EMI and joint emergency savings.

Share insurance details and bank login in written file at home.

Build Financial Discipline

Don’t skip EMI or SIP due to temporary emotional decisions.

Don’t increase lifestyle expenses after home purchase.

Stick to budget even if salary increases.

Stay focused on debt freedom and wealth growth.

What to Do If Crisis Still Comes?

Contact bank immediately if EMI is difficult to pay.

Don’t hide or delay communication.

Ask for moratorium or restructuring if needed.

You may pause SIP but never miss EMI.

Revisit budget and cut unnecessary costs.

Prepare for Future With Step-Up SIP

Once you are stable with EMI, increase SIP slowly.

Increase by 5%–10% every year.

This helps in wealth creation for future goals.

Use mutual funds for retirement, child education, and long-term goals.

Finally

You are making a big decision. But you are asking right questions.

Loan of Rs. 65 lakh is not small. But manageable with discipline.

Keep EMI under 40% of income. Keep SIP going if income allows.

Build buffer funds, insurance, and stay calm under pressure.

Always seek expert advice, not emotional suggestions.

Review financial plan yearly to stay on track.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8493 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 22, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 18, 2025
Money
Dear Sir/Ma'am, I'm a single mother,31 years old. Previously didn't take any loans or credit cards. I have no EMIs. I have zero knowledge about loans, interest rates and cibil score. But I am a co applicant for my sister's educational loan. Every month her EMI is deducting from my salary account. I'm a state government employee. Now i want to take home loan. Am i eligible for the loan or not? Somebody said I'm ineligible because of being co applicant . Is that true? Can any one help me? Please guide me in this. TIA!
Ans: You are strong and responsible as a single mother. Being a state government employee also gives you a stable income profile. You are taking care of your sister's education too. That is truly inspiring. Let me guide you step-by-step.

We will look at this from a 360-degree angle.

Your Current Financial Status

You are 31 years old.

You are a single mother with one income.

You are a state government employee with fixed monthly income.

You have never used credit cards or personal loans before.

You have no EMIs under your own name.

You are a co-applicant for your sister’s education loan.

Her EMI is getting deducted from your salary account.

You now want to apply for a home loan.

Understanding Co-Applicant Role in Loan

A co-applicant shares full responsibility of the loan.

Even if loan is for your sister, your name is on it.

If EMI gets delayed, it affects your CIBIL score.

EMI from your salary shows loan obligation on your name.

Banks see co-applicant loan as your financial liability.

It reduces your loan eligibility for new loans.

Will This Affect Your Home Loan Eligibility?

Yes, but not fully.

Being co-applicant does reduce home loan eligibility.

It doesn’t mean you are fully ineligible.

Banks still give home loans if you meet other conditions.

You need good salary, job stability, and repayment capacity.

Co-applicant EMI affects only the eligible loan amount.

It doesn’t completely stop you from getting a home loan.

Understand CIBIL Score

CIBIL score shows your past loan behaviour.

It ranges from 300 to 900.

A score above 750 is good.

If EMI is paid on time, your score stays strong.

If EMI gets delayed, your score drops.

Since EMI is from your account, your score will be affected.

You can check your CIBIL score online once for free.

What Should You Do Next?

First check your CIBIL score online.

Make sure EMI of your sister's loan is on time every month.

If not, talk to your sister and shift EMI from her account.

Talk to your bank and see if co-applicant can be removed.

This can be done if your sister gets a job and takes over.

Till then, EMI should not be missed even once.

Home Loan Application Readiness

Keep your salary slips for last 6 months.

Keep your Form 16 or income tax returns for last 2 years.

Show all bank statements of last 6–12 months.

Maintain a clean account without missed EMI or charges.

Keep a letter from your department showing your employment is permanent.

This increases your trust with banks.

How to Improve Loan Eligibility

Try to reduce other liabilities from your side.

If possible, shift EMI of sister’s loan to her account.

Avoid taking new loans or credit cards now.

Keep your savings steady in bank account.

Build an emergency fund of 6 months’ expenses.

Keep your CIBIL score above 750 through good discipline.

What Home Loan Size Can You Expect?

This depends on income, EMI burden, and credit history.

Since one EMI is already on you, your eligibility is lower.

Some banks may offer 60%–70% of your usual eligibility.

You can still get Rs. 20–25 lakh loan, or more if salary is high.

Try to apply jointly with another earning family member if possible.

Should You Take Loan Now or Wait?

If sister’s EMI is near completion, wait for a few months.

Your score and loan eligibility will improve after closing that loan.

If house need is urgent, you may proceed with reduced loan amount.

Be ready to contribute more from your savings.

Other Things to Keep in Mind

Always take home loan with fixed EMI and term.

Don’t go for variable interest if your income is fixed.

Ask bank to give EMI within 40% of your take-home salary.

Never cross 50% of your salary in total EMIs.

Always buy house for living, not as investment.

Don’t plan to sell it later for profit.

Avoid taking too big loan for a very big house.

Avoid These Mistakes

Don’t apply with too many banks at once.

Each enquiry affects your credit score.

Don’t sign as co-applicant again unless you are fully responsible.

Don’t give blank cheques or sign papers without knowing full terms.

Don’t ignore your CIBIL score ever again.

Should You Take Credit Card?

You may take one credit card now.

Use it for small monthly expenses only.

Always pay full amount before due date.

This will slowly build a better credit profile.

Don’t use credit card for shopping or cash advance.

What If You Are Rejected for Home Loan?

Ask reason in writing from bank.

Apply only after fixing the problem.

Wait 3–6 months and apply again after improving credit score.

Do not panic or feel discouraged.

Good financial behaviour gives second chance easily.

Speak to Bank Official Before Applying

Visit your bank branch and talk openly.

Share about co-applicant status and EMI from your account.

Ask them to pre-check your eligibility before formal application.

They can give better clarity on your chances.

Benefits of Being Government Employee

Job security is a big plus for loan approval.

Banks feel safe to lend to you.

You get lower interest rates than private job holders.

Your loan processing is often quicker too.

Best Approach for You Now

Start with CIBIL check and gather documents.

Keep EMI of sister’s loan regular.

Try to move EMI to her account if possible.

Apply for loan amount based on your current salary.

Don’t aim for too big house if loan eligibility is lower.

Stay patient, plan ahead, and act with confidence.

Finally

You are already doing great by managing home and family.

Your financial discipline will take you ahead.

You can get home loan with planning and right steps.

Co-applicant status affects but does not stop loan approval.

Stay informed, stay cautious and stay positive.

Your journey to homeownership is possible with right guidance.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8493 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 22, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 18, 2025
Money
I am 39 years old with monthly in-hand salary of 1.55 lacs. I have 20 lacs in PPF 17 lacs in 4 mutual funds investing 33 thousand per month. 12 lacs in EPF. 6 lacs in ssy on name of my daughter she is 8 years now. 3 lacs in NPS. My wife is govt teacher earning 90 thousand per month. she has 20 lacs in in NPS, 20 in PPF. We have purchased a builder floor in Delhi in ~2021 for 45 lacs. in 2024 we purchased an office space in Delhi for 86 lacs in year 2024. I am getting 13 thousand as rent from builder floor and 30000 as rent from office space. I want to sell builder floor and purchase a home to move in it cost me around 1.4 CR for this i might have to take a gome loan of 80 lacs i am worried to rake this bug loan. looking at my financial bg what is your opinion and do you suggest me to take this home loan.
Ans: You have done well in building strong financial pillars. This kind of diversified base offers solid long-term stability.

Now let us evaluate your current situation and future decision about the home purchase and possible home loan from a complete 360-degree angle.

Current Financial Snapshot

You earn Rs. 1.55 lakhs every month in-hand.

Your wife earns Rs. 90,000 every month as a government teacher.

You have Rs. 17 lakhs in mutual funds with Rs. 33,000 SIP monthly.

Rs. 20 lakhs in PPF under your name.

Rs. 12 lakhs in EPF corpus.

Rs. 6 lakhs in Sukanya Samriddhi for your 8-year-old daughter.

Rs. 3 lakhs in NPS.

Wife has Rs. 20 lakhs in NPS and Rs. 20 lakhs in PPF.

You earn Rs. 13,000 rent from builder floor.

Rs. 30,000 rent from office space.

Office space was bought for Rs. 86 lakhs in 2024.

Builder floor was bought for Rs. 45 lakhs in 2021.

You are now planning to sell this builder floor.

Planning to buy a house for Rs. 1.4 crore to live in.

You might need Rs. 80 lakh loan for this new house.

Real Estate Exposure Assessment

You already own an office space.

You also own a builder floor.

Real estate already forms a significant part of your portfolio.

Rental yield from both properties is quite low.

Current builder floor gives just Rs. 13,000 rent per month.

Office gives Rs. 30,000, which is acceptable but still below 5% yield.

Please note, capital appreciation in real estate is not assured.

Unlike mutual funds, real estate lacks liquidity and diversification.

Any property resale also involves high transaction cost and time.

Avoid viewing real estate as an investment option going forward.

Loan Burden Analysis

You are considering an Rs. 80 lakh home loan.

Your net family income is Rs. 2.45 lakhs per month.

Current rental income is Rs. 43,000 in total.

A loan of Rs. 80 lakh over 20 years could mean EMI around Rs. 70,000–75,000 monthly.

This will take 30% of your monthly income directly.

That will reduce cash availability for investment, education and emergencies.

EMI pressure can limit future financial flexibility and stress your budget.

You already have good passive income sources and strong savings.

Investment Portfolio Review

Your mutual fund investments of Rs. 17 lakhs are well managed.

Monthly SIP of Rs. 33,000 is a good sign of discipline.

Avoid investing directly in mutual funds without guidance.

Regular funds through MFD with Certified Financial Planner offer better value.

Direct funds can create confusion and poor exit strategy.

A well-guided regular plan keeps emotions and wrong timing out.

Continue mutual fund SIP and increase annually if possible.

Your PPF, EPF and SSY are secure and tax-efficient debt components.

NPS offers long-term benefit, but only for retirement planning.

Avoid depending on NPS for medium term goals.

Family Goal Planning

Your daughter is 8 years old.

You will need funds for her higher education in next 8–10 years.

House EMI for Rs. 80 lakh will reduce your ability to save for her.

Buying a bigger house now may delay wealth creation for future goals.

Stay focused on education, retirement and medical security first.

Options to Reduce Loan Size

Consider using part of your investments to reduce loan size.

Selling builder floor can give you approx. Rs. 45–55 lakhs.

Use that as down payment to reduce loan to Rs. 60–65 lakhs.

Liquidate only what is not long-term goal linked.

Do not touch PPF, EPF or SSY for home down payment.

If required, pause SIP for 12–18 months, but resume early.

Also consider partially using NPS if allowed after 60 years of age.

Emergency Fund and Contingency Review

Do you have 6–9 months of expenses saved as emergency fund?

With EMI of Rs. 70,000, you must have Rs. 3–5 lakhs as cash or liquid funds.

Keep this amount safe for job loss, health emergencies or family needs.

Emergency fund is the most ignored but crucial safety net.

Cash Flow Insight

Monthly in-hand income is Rs. 2.45 lakhs from both of you.

Rent adds another Rs. 43,000.

This makes Rs. 2.88 lakhs income per month.

Monthly SIP is Rs. 33,000.

Proposed EMI will be around Rs. 70,000.

This leaves enough for lifestyle and other expenses.

Still, it is always better to avoid unnecessary big EMI burden.

Suggestions Before Buying Home

Wait for 6–9 months if possible.

Save more for bigger down payment.

Try to bring loan down to Rs. 60 lakhs or less.

Avoid touching investments made for retirement or daughter.

If selling builder floor gives Rs. 50+ lakhs, go ahead with plan.

Compare ready-to-move house vs. under-construction options.

Do not rush just because property prices are rising.

Mental Peace vs. Financial Logic

Owning a house gives mental satisfaction and stability.

But, it should not disturb other goals.

You are already doing very well financially.

Adding Rs. 80 lakh loan may disturb this healthy balance.

Take a house loan only if it fits into your life, not to match society.

You should feel free, not stuck, because of EMI pressure.

Risk Checkpoints

Are you adequately insured for life and health?

Do you have term insurance covering 15–20 times of your salary?

Are you and your family covered under good health insurance?

These are non-negotiable before taking any big home loan.

Tax Angle Awareness

Home loan interest gives tax benefit under section 24.

Principal repaid is allowed under section 80C.

But benefits should not be the only reason to take loan.

Focus on net wealth creation after EMI and opportunity cost.

Final Insights

You are financially disciplined and have built solid base.

Buying a home is a personal decision.

But taking Rs. 80 lakh loan now is not ideal.

Try to reduce loan by higher down payment.

Prioritise daughter’s education, retirement and financial freedom.

Continue mutual funds SIP and avoid real estate-based investing.

Talk to a Certified Financial Planner for customised step-by-step execution plan.

Focus on long-term compounding with stability and peace of mind.

You are on the right track. Just be careful not to over-leverage.

Smart financial choices today will give more peace tomorrow.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8493 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 22, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 18, 2025
Money
Hello I am 36 years old, married blessed with 2 daughters. My wife is also earning, she is taking care of kids education currently. I have an ongoing home loan with current outstanding loan of 70L. My current EMI is close to 63K per month. Remaining Tenure 205 months. My take home in-hand salary is around 1.7L per annum. So apart from EMI, house expenses+ giving money to the family comes to around 50K per month. I have started investing around 45k per month as SIP. My current investments into SIP is around 15L. My aim is to be debt free . Is it good idea to reduce the loan with this SIP investment?
Ans: You are 36 years old, married, and father of two daughters. Your wife is working and currently managing the children’s education. You are repaying a home loan with Rs. 70 lakh outstanding. The EMI is Rs. 63,000 per month, and the tenure left is 205 months. Your monthly in-hand salary is Rs. 1.7 lakh. After EMI and family expenses of Rs. 50,000, you are still investing Rs. 45,000 per month as SIP. Your total SIP corpus is Rs. 15 lakh.

You want to become debt-free. You are wondering if it is a good idea to use your SIP corpus to reduce the loan.

Let us evaluate your situation from all angles.



Income and Expenses Review
You have Rs. 1.7 lakh monthly salary. That is a decent and stable income.



Rs. 63,000 goes as EMI. Rs. 50,000 for household and family support.



This leaves you with Rs. 57,000 per month.



Out of this, you are investing Rs. 45,000 SIP per month.



That means you are managing well and maintaining savings discipline.



Excellent financial behaviour. Most families cannot save this much.



SIP Investment Progress
You already built Rs. 15 lakh through SIPs. That’s a great start.



You are in the habit of regular saving. This is your biggest strength.



SIPs are long-term wealth creators. The key is consistency.



If you stay invested, this corpus will grow significantly over time.



But you are now considering redeeming it to reduce home loan.



Let us understand both sides clearly.



Home Loan Status
Rs. 70 lakh loan outstanding. 205 months remaining. EMI is Rs. 63,000.



This is a long-term liability. But it is a structured one.



You are not struggling with EMI. That is important to note.



Home loans come with tax benefits. Interest and principal both give deductions.



It helps reduce your taxable income.



Reducing this loan sounds good emotionally, but may not be best financially.



Should You Use SIP Corpus to Prepay Loan?
Let us evaluate this carefully.



Using Rs. 15 lakh from SIP to reduce loan will bring down EMI or tenure.



But it will stop the compounding of that Rs. 15 lakh.



SIP in mutual funds has potential to deliver higher returns than loan interest.



Over long-term, equity mutual funds grow faster than the cost of a loan.



So keeping SIP invested gives better wealth growth.



You will also lose liquidity if you prepay loan. That’s a risk.



In case of job loss or emergency, you can’t get money back from loan.



But SIP corpus is accessible if really needed.



So using SIP to reduce loan is not advisable at this stage.



Your loan EMI is not hurting your budget. So you can continue as is.



What Can Be Done Instead?
You can follow a balanced and flexible strategy.



Continue your Rs. 45,000 SIP. Do not stop it.



Split this SIP amount into growth-oriented and hybrid mutual funds.



Use actively managed funds. Avoid index funds. Index funds follow market blindly.



In down markets, they fall equally. No protection during correction.



Actively managed funds aim to reduce downside and find better growth.



Choose regular plans via a Certified Mutual Fund Distributor working with a Certified Financial Planner.



Direct funds don’t offer advice or review. You will miss strategic help.



Regular plans come with personalised support and ongoing monitoring.



That is more valuable than slightly lower expense ratio.



Use part of your growing SIP corpus later for home loan prepayment in 4-5 years.



This way you benefit from compounding and debt reduction.



Debt Freedom Goal – A Step-by-Step Plan
You want to become debt-free. That’s a powerful goal. Let’s plan for it.



Don’t aim to close full loan immediately. Plan for a staged prepayment.



Every 3 to 5 years, use part of your corpus to reduce principal.



This shortens loan tenure and reduces interest burden.



At the same time, keep investing parallelly.



Maintain a clear balance between long-term investment and debt reduction.



Avoid emotional decisions. Focus on long-term financial logic.



Reinvest bonuses or surplus into mutual funds. Use them later for bulk prepayment.



Avoid pulling SIP corpus unless you have a shortfall in emergencies.



You can use part of SIP corpus to prepay loan when it crosses Rs. 25 to 30 lakh.



Emergency Fund and Liquidity
Do you have an emergency fund? If not, create one soon.



Keep 6 months’ expenses as reserve. Use liquid or ultra-short-term funds.



Do not invest emergency fund in equity. Keep it separate.



Emergency fund gives peace and safety. Never use it for loan prepayment.



Child Education and Family Planning
Your wife is handling kids’ education. That gives you flexibility.



In a few years, education costs will rise. Plan early.



Use goal-based investing for each child’s milestone.



SIPs should be mapped to each goal. Use separate folios if needed.



Review each goal with a Certified Financial Planner once a year.



Do not mix children’s education fund with loan prepayment plans.



Keep goals separate for clarity and better management.



Insurance Protection Check
Do you have a term life cover? Make sure it’s 10x your yearly income.



Home loan is big. Your family needs safety if anything happens.



Do not rely on ULIPs or endowment plans. They give poor cover and low returns.



If you hold such policies, consider surrendering. Reinvest that money in mutual funds.



Health insurance is a must for you and family.



Even if your employer provides cover, keep personal cover too.



It helps after job switch or retirement.



Tax Planning Insight
You can claim Rs. 1.5 lakh under 80C for home loan principal.



Claim interest up to Rs. 2 lakh under section 24.



SIP in ELSS mutual fund also gives 80C benefit.



But don’t invest just for tax saving. See overall returns too.



Keep documentation ready for all claims.



Final Insights
You are already on the right track. You are managing EMI, expenses, and still investing. That shows discipline.



Using SIP corpus now to reduce loan is not the best decision.



Continue investing. Let compounding build your wealth. Use partial corpus in future for prepayment.



Stay invested in regular mutual fund plans through Certified MFDs associated with CFPs.



Avoid index and direct funds. They lack guidance, risk control, and personalised support.



Build a strong base with emergency fund, term insurance, and goal-based SIPs.



You are young. Your income is growing. Let time and planning work for you.



You can become debt-free and financially secure within 8 to 10 years.



Stay focused. Review once a year. Avoid panic or shortcuts.



You are doing great. Just stay steady.



Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8493 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 22, 2025

Money
Sir, I am single earning mother aged 54 years government job earning take home salary 1.20 lacs. Son 24 years studying. He will take another two years for completion. I am having a total loan of 35 lacs i.e personal loan and home loan. Took a personal loan for puchase of land. I feel I made a mistake by taking huge loan and paying emi. Is my decision right or I should not have opted for taking loan. Rather I should have invested. At present I don't have any savings. But I will get a good amount of pension. Is my decision right
Ans: You are a single mother, 54 years old, working in a government job, and earning Rs. 1.20 lakhs take-home every month. You are managing your son’s education and a Rs. 35 lakh loan that includes a personal loan for land purchase and a home loan. You have no savings currently but are expecting a decent pension.

This shows your strong commitment and sense of responsibility. You have already supported your child up to age 24. That is a great achievement.

Let us go step-by-step and assess your current situation fully, and work on how to improve it.



Income and Expense Structure
You earn Rs. 1.20 lakhs per month. This is a stable government salary.



A part of this goes to EMI. Remaining is spent on household and child’s needs.



You currently have no savings. This puts some stress on your financial safety.



You will have a good pension. That is a major strength.



Loan Analysis
You have a total loan of Rs. 35 lakhs. This includes a personal loan and a home loan.



Personal loans come with high interest. This can affect your cash flow.



Using personal loans for land purchase is not ideal. Land does not give regular income.



But the decision is already made. So now, focus on the next best steps.



Your loan is not a failure. It is a learning. You acted for your family.



What You Can Do Now
Let us plan from a 360-degree perspective. We will try to improve your financial life step by step.



1. Expense Management and Budgeting
List your monthly fixed expenses, EMI, household costs, and child-related costs.



Find areas to reduce or control expenses. Even Rs. 5,000 per month saving helps.



Avoid impulsive expenses. Say no to non-urgent purchases.



Build a clear budget and track it monthly.



Use a simple notebook or app to write down expenses.



2. Emergency Fund Creation
This is your first priority before investing.



Start saving Rs. 3,000 to Rs. 5,000 per month if possible.



Build an emergency fund equal to at least 3 to 6 months of monthly expenses.



Keep this fund in a liquid form. Use savings account or low-risk instruments.



Never touch this fund for regular expenses.



3. Loan Repayment Strategy
Focus on clearing the personal loan first. It has higher interest.



Do not try to pre-close the home loan unless cash flow allows.



Consider discussing with your bank if a restructuring option is possible.



If you get any bonus or arrears, use it for part pre-payment.



Never miss any EMI. Your credit score should stay strong.



4. Investment Planning
Once emergency fund is ready, and loan EMI is manageable, start investing small amounts.



Start SIPs in mutual funds through regular plans using an experienced MFD who works with a CFP.



Do not choose direct plans. They may seem cheaper but come with no guidance or help.



Direct plan investors miss rebalancing and timely action during market ups and downs.



Regular plans through MFDs give you advice, access to portfolio review, and strategy.



Also, avoid index funds. They copy the market. But they don’t manage risk in bad times.



Actively managed funds by professionals aim to protect value in market falls.



Invest slowly and steadily. Focus on long-term compounding.



Start with Rs. 3,000 to Rs. 5,000 SIP once emergency fund is ready.



5. Child’s Education Planning
Your son is 24 years old. He will complete studies in 2 years.



Until then, he is financially dependent. Plan your expenses around this timeline.



Once he starts earning, your monthly cost burden will reduce.



Encourage him to take responsibility for small costs soon.



Share your situation honestly with him. He will understand.



6. Retirement and Pension Planning
You are nearing retirement in a few years. So building post-retirement safety is key.



Your government pension is a great advantage. It gives income for life.



Even after pension starts, keep investing part of it in mutual funds.



Avoid traditional insurance-based investments. They offer low returns.



If you hold any ULIP or traditional endowment policy, review and consider surrendering.



Shift the surrendered amount into mutual funds in a staggered way.



Never buy products that promise returns with insurance. They do not beat inflation.



7. Insurance Protection
Ensure you have a term life insurance policy until your son becomes independent.



If not, take one now. Term plan is low-cost and gives high cover.



Once your son becomes financially independent, you may not need life insurance.



Maintain your health insurance even after retirement. Renew it without break.



Ensure the policy has enough sum insured. Top-up if needed.



8. Future Asset Management
Once your loans are cleared and pension starts, shift focus to asset creation.



Monthly SIPs should continue even after retirement. This keeps your money growing.



Use a mix of large-cap, flexi-cap, and hybrid mutual funds.



Review your portfolio once a year with a CFP.



Invest with goal-based approach. Short-term needs in safe options. Long-term goals in equity.



Do not chase high returns. Focus on balance between safety and growth.



9. Legal and Estate Planning
Make a simple Will. Mention your assets and your son as nominee or heir.



Ensure your bank accounts, insurance, and investments have proper nominations.



This helps in smooth transfer and avoids future disputes.



10. Emotional and Mental Peace
Money issues can feel heavy. But you have already done a lot.



Be kind to yourself. You have raised your son with full commitment.



Every step from now should be calm and planned.



You don’t need to compare with others. Your life is unique.



Even small savings from now can grow big in few years.



Finally
You have taken a bold step in raising a child single-handedly while handling job and loans. That alone shows your strength. While taking a personal loan for land may not have been ideal, your intent was to secure the future. Do not feel regret. Use the lessons and focus on financial recovery.

Start with small consistent savings. Reduce personal loan burden first. Avoid new debt. Begin SIPs once emergency fund is ready. Use only actively managed mutual funds via regular plans with a certified mutual fund distributor who works with a CFP. Build your confidence again.

Remember, it’s not too late. Financial peace is still possible. Plan, act, and stay steady.



Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8493 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 22, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 18, 2025
Money
I am 28 M single, have a salary of 40k,how would I go about making a saving so that I am settled at 35-38 years of age.I am not fully knowledgeable of stocks and other options, personal spending is around 20k per month out of the 40k on the salary.
Ans: It's commendable that you're thinking ahead about your financial future. At 28, with a monthly income of Rs. 40,000 and personal expenses around Rs. 20,000, you have a solid foundation to build upon. Let's explore a comprehensive approach to help you become financially settled by the age of 35-38.

Understanding Your Current Financial Position
Income and Expenses: You have a surplus of Rs. 20,000 each month after expenses.

Age Advantage: Being 28 gives you a 7-10 year horizon to plan and invest.

Financial Goals: Aiming to be financially settled by 35-38 is a realistic and achievable goal.

Building a Strong Financial Foundation
Emergency Fund: Aim to save at least 3-6 months' worth of expenses, i.e., Rs. 60,000 to Rs. 1,20,000.

Health Insurance: Ensure you have adequate health coverage to protect against unforeseen medical expenses.

Life Insurance: Consider term insurance if you have dependents or plan to have in the future.

Strategic Savings and Investments
Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs): Start with a monthly SIP of Rs. 5,000 to Rs. 10,000 in diversified mutual funds

Public Provident Fund (PPF): Invest Rs. 1,500 to Rs. 2,000 monthly for long-term, tax-free returns.

Recurring Deposits (RDs): Allocate Rs. 2,000 to Rs. 3,000 monthly for short-term goals.

Enhancing Financial Literacy
Educational Resources: Read books and articles on personal finance to deepen your understanding.

Workshops and Seminars: Attend financial planning workshops to gain practical insights.

Consult a Certified Financial Planner: Seek professional advice to tailor a plan specific to your goals.

Monitoring and Adjusting Your Plan
Regular Reviews: Assess your financial plan every 6 months to ensure alignment with your goals.

Adjust Contributions: Increase your investment amounts as your income grows.

Stay Informed: Keep abreast of market trends and adjust your portfolio accordingly.

Final Insights
By consistently saving and investing wisely, you can achieve financial stability by 35-38. Starting early and staying disciplined are key to building wealth over time. Remember, financial planning is a continuous process that adapts to your evolving life circumstances.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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