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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |409 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 01, 2024

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Sep 29, 2024
Relationship

Hi mam please help me. My ex boyfriend nd i were in a long distance relationship. He lives in canada nd we used to vc but one day that vc turned out something else as you can understand he told me that he'll not take any screenshot or screen record anything but he still did that and now after breakup he's sending me those screenshots nd screen recording ???? nd telling me that he'll not share with anyone but i still don't trust him now ???? what should i do .. due to this pressure I'm simply going down day by day

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I understand that it is a difficult situation for you. I would suggest a few ways you can protect yourself-
If you think he will not share the pictures unless provoked, do not engage with him any further. Avoid responding and try not to give him control over the situation.

Keep screenshots of his messages where he discusses the pictures. In case he starts threatening you, you can let him know that you are not afraid to approach the authorities with valid proof against him. This way, you will have control over the situation.

Let him know that in both India and Canada, distributing images without consent is illegal.

Speak to your trusted friends and family members. Remember, as scared as you might be, you can always share things with your parents. They would be more worried about your mental health and safety than be disappointed over the matter. Understand that you can always reach out to them, especially when you have your back against the wall.

After you have gathered all the evidence you need to prove that he has been harassing you with non-consented pictures, block him. Engaging with him will allow this person to manipulate you or make him believe he has the upper hand.

Lastly, don't be afraid. He might think he is doing this out of love, but he is, essentially, a bully. Do not give him the power to play with your mental peace.

Hope everything works out soon.

Best Wishes.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |409 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jul 23, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 21, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Me and my boyfriend are in long distance relationship from past 6 months, I told him about my past in almost starting of it that I had 2 friends with benefits in past and one of that person was my classmate as well as friend, and he used to still contact me, and when I came in relationship also, he called me during that time and I told regarding my relationship status, and I also informed my boyfriend that I talked with him but this thing happened before he knows that I had physical intimacy with him, then when he asked me to block, I suddenly question "what is the point of blocking him" which I regret the most, but I blocked him later by myself, now my boyfriend is sayine me that I have cheated him and he won't trust me till his death, but I told everything in past happened to him. I love him a lot but he is not giving to work together in this relationship and saying that he won't stay loyal to me anymore, he won't trust be ever, as per him I have cheated him, but my intentions were not wrong at all, tho that guy was in contact but I never initiate any conversation with him while I came into relationship, is it really a cheat, is it that he should not trust me anymore? Please guide
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

It sounds like you are going through a rough time and I am sorry for it. Here's a thought and I am sure you have thought of it too, try to see things from his perspective. While you know that you never cheated nor meant to, it is important to acknowledge that your boyfriend's feelings are valid. He is feeling betrayed and that's a fact. Now, our goal should be to fix this issue. How do we do it? Communication is the only way. Tell him that you understand his perspective but it is important that he sees yours too. If he wants to vent, listen to him. Do not interrupt or become defensive. Understand whatever he says is coming from his insecurity. I know it's difficult not to take it personally, but his statements will be a reflection of his feelings and not your character. Remember this during the conversation. Once he is done speaking, reassure him that you had no intention of cheating. You can also reassure him of your commitment. Promise to be more transparent and point out that you were honest with him from the beginning. If you had any intention to cheat, you could have easily not shared with him your past. But you did and that shows that you are committed to this relationship. Tell him that you understand the need for boundaries and it is not okay to be in touch with people who make your partner uncomfortable.

Look, rebuilding trust needs work and it also takes time. Both of you need to work on it. You will have to work on making him trust you and he will have to work on letting go of his misconception (which might be his reality) and trust you wholly again. Relationships don't work till two people trust each other completely. If he continues to say that he can't trust you again, it might be best to reconsider this relationship. Even though your words hurt him, you did not cheat on him in reality. Why should you have to live in fear that he will cheat on you merely to take revenge?

After you put in all the effort, see where it goes. If things do not get better, rethinking the relationship would be best. Everyone deserves someone who can trust and be trusted.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1293 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 12, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hii mam my ex boyfriend is hacker i never seen him or meet him it was long distance relationship he had my lot of picture I like other guy and want to stay with him but that creep torture me every single day I'm feeling suicidel cuz of this mental pressure he said he'll send my intimate picture to my parents and other family member i don't know where he lives now does he look his exact contact number cuz he used fake number and all I'm so stressed mam please help me
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You are bothered by a creep who you haven't even met?
Inform the police and the case will most likely be registered as a cyber bullying/harassment. (You can get more information from the cops on this). You do not need to know where he lives etc, just keep a trail of all communication that you have had with him intact as proof.
And hey, he was never your boyfriend and there was no relationship; you were not involved with someone that you have not seen or met. This is real life and not some fiction story...So, get real, shake yourself from this great 'involvement' theory. He is a person who possibly is used to threatening and blackmailing women/girls...Simply go to the police with all the proof and let them do their job. Now is the time to be brave and stand up for yourself...

This should become a lesson to you that you DO NOT share private information with anyone over the net, chats or any other electronic media...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |409 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 16, 2024

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Relationship
Hii sir ! This is ritika and I love a boy and we are in relationship since 7 years but there are some behavior of him he always have doubt on me that I am dating another boy he always says that start you screenshare in WhatsApp I even do because I don't want to lose him and he saw all of things of my phone yesterday he again asking for that and I do and there was a tab of instagram which was belongs to my roommate it was her I'd open in my chrome browser where she only wants to delete the I'd which she did from my phone these instagram thing happened approx one year ago but when he saw this I told him that was not mine but he continuously said I am cheater I cheated with him again he was like I know you have two mobile phones and you cheated with me. I love him soo much but he cannot try to accept that . Even I don't talk to my male classmate because he didn't want ki main kisi boy se baat karu Is it fair , am I cheater ? I love him unconditionally I support him in all his career or decision but again he was like I cheated with him we are in long distance relationship but I can't cheat him . Literally I am feeling depressed ????
Ans: Dear Ritika,

Please understand that you did nothing wrong. Why would you even question yourself? You know you never cheated. It's his issue that he cannot trust. Yes, in a relationship we all try to comfort our partners but that too should be to a certain extent. And, in that process, if your mental health is being compromised, I don't see how it's a healthy relationship.

I don't want to tell you what to do, but I would reassure you that YOU DID NOTHING WRONG. You don't need to prove yourself anymore. And I can also assure you that no matter what you do, he will still manage to find some flaws and doubt you. It's a typical behavior we see in some partners. You deserve peace, love, and above all, to be trusted.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

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I am a 30-year-old woman from an upper-middle-class business family. I've been in a relationship for the past four years with a man who holds a government job, while I recently completed my MBA and started working at a reputable company. He comes from a modest background, and we are from different castes. About a year and a half ago, I introduced him to my family as a potential partner, but they were strongly opposed to the idea. At the time, I decided to let it go, but now I feel compelled to try again. However, I’m uncertain about how to approach my parents, and with time passing, I find myself questioning the decision to marry someone from a different background. What should I do?
Ans: First, it might be helpful to reflect on your relationship itself. After four years, you likely know each other well, and it’s good to take stock of what you value in your partner. Think about whether you see a long-term future together, especially in terms of shared goals, values, and mutual support. These are the foundational elements that matter most, regardless of background or status. If you’re truly aligned, you can have confidence that you’re making a choice based on a solid partnership.

If you’re still sure about moving forward, you can prepare to approach your parents again. This time, try focusing on helping them see him as a person rather than through the lens of caste or financial background. Highlight his qualities—his character, values, work ethic, and the positive impact he has on your life. Family resistance often stems from fears about compatibility or security, so if you can show them that he’s a stable, dependable person who brings happiness and balance to your life, it may help ease their concerns.

At the same time, it’s natural to worry about how lifestyle differences might play out. You might consider having an open conversation with your partner about any potential challenges you foresee. Talking openly now about things like finances, family roles, and lifestyle expectations can give you both a clearer picture of what marriage will look like and whether you feel ready to commit.

If you’re still unsure, give yourself time to think it over without pressure. Marriage is a big commitment, and it’s okay to take your time. Make sure your decision reflects what’s truly right for you and the life you want to build, and trust yourself to make the choice that feels right in the end.

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hello, I'm a 49F married for 21years. It was an arranged match, and from day one my husband and sister have not gotten along. I've also been naive and under my sister's control for a long time, which has angered my husband a lot. In March they both had a verbal altercation and have not been on talking terms. Now my husband is not letting my 18y son meet my sister. My husband is demanding a sorry from my sister, post which only my son can meet her. I'm really sad as my sister dearly loves my son, also I don't feel its morally right to involve children in family politics. And my sister will not apologize to my husband. Need help to understand on how to get my innocent son out of this mess. My husband is very controlling, very angry, very interfering person, overall he has a very negative perspective on everything.
Ans: It might help to approach this from a place of calm and clarity, starting by recognizing that both your husband and your sister likely feel hurt in their own ways. Your husband’s demand for an apology may come from years of built-up tension and perhaps a feeling that he hasn’t been supported in the past. On the other hand, your sister may feel hurt or defensive, making her unwilling to apologize. While it would be ideal for them to resolve this between themselves, you’ve noticed that it’s now affecting your son, and you understandably want to protect him from being caught in the middle.

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With your sister, if you have a trusting relationship, consider sharing that her relationship with your son is important, but so is reducing tension in the family. Without asking her to apologize, you might just express that a little openness on her part could make a big difference in helping your son maintain his connections.

This might take time to work through, and that’s okay. In the meantime, keep reassuring your son that he’s loved by everyone. Explain to him that sometimes adults have disagreements, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s cared for. Keeping those bonds strong now could help everyone come to a better place down the line.

This is a tough situation, but focusing on your values—family harmony and your son’s well-being—can help guide you through it.

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Pradeep Pramanik  |176 Answers  |Ask -

Career And Placement Consultant - Answered on Nov 12, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 29, 2024Hindi
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Pradeep, I am a professional with more than 17 years of experience in Operations, team management. Currently I have started working in a global MNC in a global position. Earlier I was working with the same organization for more than 10 years. Then during Covid, I lost my job. Finally, settled down with another company with almost 40% less salary. Though I loved the role and responsibilities there. I was a Senior Team Lead there. I liked the role where I was managing the team, working with the team. But due to some internal politics, I lost my job in that organization too in this year only. Why I am saying politics? Because just before they fired me, I got best performer award and best employee of the last quarter 2024 award. Then I rejoined my old organization with lots of hope. But now I am finiding it difficult to cope up in this global role. The top management expected me to know everything within 3 to 4 months and start delivering. One of the biggest hurdle that I am facing is that earlier when I was in this organization for more than 10 years, I was in another process. This time I got in a role where the process is completely different. Also no proper training is provided. I am not get a fulfiling satisfaction from this role. Also I am not able to get job satisfaction and now I am thinking of quitting and start something of my own. A business venture or a consultancy service. But not sure how to start and also afraid of the flow of income. I have a mother who is suffering from age related problems. Have a little kid of 12 years. My wife is not working. I tried to switch jobs. But it seems that no one is there to take someone who is almost at 45 years of age. I am loosing my hope and confidence day by day. Please help.
Ans: Dear... Request you to mention the question in precise way to understand what exactly you require from us. Big question normally indicates state of confusion somewhere hence difficult to repply which will satisfy you.

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