Does it good to talk about partners past which i get to know later ?

Ans:

You say he already knows about your past relationship. Has he been accepting of it? If so, then there’s no need to go into the nitty gritty details, is there?

People in relationships are obviously physical with each other; only a fool would assume otherwise.

And what about his past? Has he told you about it?

Yes, I do think you should be honest with your partner if it’s weighing on you or bothering you. If not, and suffice to say he knows of your past relationship and hasn’t asked for further details, then leave it alone.

But I will say this: if you do tell him, you’ll know the kind of man you’re marrying.

If he’s fine with it and accepts that everyone has a history and it is to be accepted as part of them, that’s fine.

If not, then, well, I would call off the marriage if I were in your place, forget him doing so! Who wants to be married to an old-fashioned chauvinist?

 

Ans: Have you asked yourself - why are you scared? What are you scared of?

If you feel he can leave you if you discuss it, then it's not worth to be in their relationship anyway.

A healthy relationships inspires open communication and non judgemental attitude.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am sorry that you are hurting but her past truly should not matter to you in the present. Ideally, I am not in favor of pushing people to disclose their past experiences, especially if they are not comfortable with it. But I agree that she was wrong to get into a relationship with you when you specifically showed dislike towards the things you mentioned. I suppose she liked you too much and did not want to ruin her chances. I should also mention that judging a person by their past or because they had certain kinds of relations with their ex is not fair; you were not in the picture. Regardless of it, your pain is valid. It isn't easy to come to terms with new information about your partner's past.

Now hear me out, past is in the past. It can only hurt you if you let it. Think about it properly- did she do anything in the present to hurt you? NO. Can you or she change the past? NO. Should she apologize for having a past? NO. Should you move past this and work towards a better future? That's the only thing in your control. Chose wisely. If you think you will hold her accountable for this forever, then you both should reconsider this relationship. If you think this fight is meaningless, and want to move forward with your relationship, then great.

Best Wishes.