Home > Relationship > Question

Sign In | Create an account

Language:

Now in हिन्दी too

Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help

Arrange marriage: Should I ask the girl out for coffee before marriage is fixed?

Kanchan Rai |552 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 23, 2024

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 22, 2024Hindi

Relationship

Arrange marriage:Last week I visited the girl's home for the first time with my family. She spoke with me in a friendly manner, but she mentioned twice that it's difficult to understand someone in the first meeting. Three days later, they informed the middleman that they like me, and my father will communicate our decision to them. They will plan to visit my home in two weeks, after which the marriage will be fixed. In the meantime, should I send her a friend request and ask to meet at a coffee shop, or should I wait to talk to her until after the marriage is fixed in two weeks?

Ans: If you feel comfortable and the environment is open enough, sending a friend request could be a way to gently open up a line of communication without overstepping any boundaries. It allows her to accept at her own pace. After the friend request, you could start with light, respectful conversation to get to know her better, keeping it casual and non-intrusive. Asking to meet at a coffee shop is a good idea, but only if she seems comfortable engaging in that kind of interaction before things are officially finalized.

It’s essential to be patient and read the situation carefully. If you sense that she might prefer waiting for the official approval of the families, it might be wise to hold off on asking for a meetup until after the marriage is fixed. This would allow both families to feel more at ease and give you two more space to connect after the formalities.

Ultimately, it’s about balancing respect for tradition with your desire to build a connection. If she has shown openness, and you feel like she might appreciate the gesture, reaching out before the marriage is fixed could help both of you get to know each other in a more comfortable setting. But if you’re unsure, waiting the two weeks won’t hurt either.

RelationshipReply

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Mohit Arora | Answer |Ask -Follow

Dating Coach - Answered on Jul 06, 2024

Question by Umesh - Jun 21, 2024Hindi

Relationship

My name is Umesh and my age is 28 and loving girl age is 18 since two years ago. Before started the relationship i spoken to her mother she agree for marriage. Now I am asking for engagement because two years happened and her mother discussed with her brother. But brother is not agree. Girls is saying you should wait after some time he will agree. Note girls father is ded. As I mentioned my age 28 family is forcing me for marriage but girls family not agree. Girls is agree but she wants to wait again for next two years without any confirmation. What should I do. Should I wait her or can I move forward

Ans: There are a few things to consider in this situation.

First, it is important to remember that you are both adults. You are free to make your own decisions about your relationship. However, it is also important to be respectful of your families' wishes.

Second, it is important to be realistic about your expectations. It is possible that the girl's brother will never agree to your marriage. If you are not willing to wait indefinitely, then you may need to move on.

Third, it is important to communicate with your girlfriend. She needs to understand your feelings and your concerns. If she is not willing to compromise, then you may need to reconsider your relationship.

Ultimately, the decision of whether or not to wait for your girlfriend is up to you. However, I would encourage you to consider the following points:

Why are you in a hurry to get married?
There is no need to rush into marriage. You are both still young and have plenty of time to find the right person for you.

Are you sure that your girlfriend is the right person for you?
You have only been dating for two years. It is important to make sure that you are both compatible and that you have similar goals for the future.

Are you willing to wait indefinitely for your girlfriend's brother to agree to your marriage?If you are not willing to wait, then you may need to move on.

If you do decide to wait for your girlfriend, I would recommend that you set a deadline. This will give you something to work towards and will help you to stay motivated. It is also important to communicate your deadline to your girlfriend so that she knows what to expect.

There are many other girls out there. If you are not willing to wait for your girlfriend, then you can easily find someone else. However, it is important to remember that finding the right person takes time. Don't rush into anything. Take your time and find someone who is right for you.

Mohit Arora S
Founder - Real Dating School

www.realdatingschool.com/1-1_call

Anu Krishna |1530 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 19, 2025

Question by Shubham - Feb 18, 2025Hindi

Relationship

We are planning to meet but we are distant apart...and we arr going to tell our parents once it for all...so that we keep not regrets behind..we both are from similar kind of middle class..m s marathi and she s a bengali.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
First meet in the real world and then make plans for the future.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Anu Krishna |1530 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 22, 2025

Question by Shubham - Feb 20, 2025Hindi

Relationship

Hello mam, totally agreeing to your point. But situation here is a bit complex as without meeting we have gotten strong feelings and she had one toxic past relationship to which she had lost trust on love and all..I brought back same..and now she is giving her all for the same..so if we meet and then don't know if our parents don't agree or anything happens in that case that will weaken her more putting herself in that zone again. So we are planning to talk to our parents first and with their consent planning to meet because m in mumbai and she is in kolkata and it's not like ki we can meet immediately.. Hope u understand this concern.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Well if you have decided what to do, great then! You seem to have figured out what is to be done.
That's why I don't see why you actually reached out on this platform and what is the concern to understand...You do realize that a few things that you have mentioned don't work in the real world. But hey, you know what is to be done...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Latest Questions

Dr Nagarajan Jsk |261 Answers |Ask -Follow

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on Feb 23, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 23, 2025Hindi

Career

Hi sir, My OBC Certificate issued in 2021. Can I use this in neet 2025 application form for uploading documents? Please explain sir

Ans: Hi, OBC certificate is very old. The validity of the caste certificate is one year. You may use the same certificate for application purposes, but you must have a valid one, including the creamy layer and Non-Creamy Layer (NCL) status, at the time of admission. Your admission will be based on this. Therefore, it is advisable to obtain a new certificate.
Better apply for same and get it ASAP.

Dr Nagarajan Jsk |261 Answers |Ask -Follow

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on Feb 23, 2025

Question by Ajija - Feb 23, 2025Hindi

Career

Mere pass 2023 ka caste certificate h obc NCL vo neet 2025 ke liye valid h

Ans: Hi Ajija,
The validity of the caste certificate is one year. You may use the same certificate for application purposes, but you must have a valid one, including the creamy layer and Non-Creamy Layer (NCL) status, at the time of admission. Your admission will be based on this. Therefore, it is advisable to obtain a new certificate as soon as possible.
Best of Luck.

Dr Dipankar Dutta |815 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Feb 23, 2025

Question by rajani - Feb 22, 2025Hindi

Career

I got 94 percentile in jee mains 2025 in general ews female category what branch and nit can I get

Ans: High Chance (Core Branches & IT)
NIT Nagaland – IT / ECE / Electrical
NIT Mizoram – IT / ECE / Electrical
NIT Meghalaya – ECE / Electrical
NIT Sikkim – IT / ECE
NIT Arunachal Pradesh – IT / ECE
Moderate Chance (Good Branches in Mid-Tier NITs)
NIT Silchar – Civil / Mechanical / Electrical
NIT Agartala – IT / Civil / Mechanical
NIT Jalandhar – Industrial & Production / Biotechnology

Dr Dipankar Dutta |815 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Feb 23, 2025

Question by M - Feb 22, 2025Hindi

Career

Sir my son .jee mains 98.186%-EWS-boy. NIT or IIIT. CDE

Ans: Congratulations to your son. With 98.186 percentile (EWS, Male) in JEE Mains, your son has a good chance of getting CSE, Data Science, or AI/ML in some NITs, IIITs, and GFTIs.

Dr Dipankar Dutta |815 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Feb 23, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 22, 2025Hindi

Career

I got 83.92 percentile from obc category can i get any nit/iiit with cse branch

Ans: With 83.92 percentile (OBC category) in JEE Mains, getting CSE in top NITs/IIITs is difficult, but you might have chances in lower NITs, IIITs, and GFTIs in later rounds or spot rounds.

Dr Dipankar Dutta |815 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Feb 23, 2025

Question by charishma - Feb 22, 2025Hindi

Career

i got 99.5% in jee mains can i get cse in top nits like trichy and warangal ( OBC Female)

Ans: Congratulations. With 99.5 percentile in JEE Mains (OBC-NCL Female category), you have an excellent chance of getting CSE in top NITs like NIT Trichy, NIT Warangal, and NIT Surathkal.

Dr Dipankar Dutta |815 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Feb 23, 2025

Question by Kolagatla - Feb 22, 2025

Career

My son got jee mains 97.7 percentile in general ews category, which college is best for cse or artificial intelligence and machine learning courses or Robotics

Ans: If he wants CSE with AI/ML, prefer NITs like Surathkal, Trichy, Warangal, Allahabad or IIIT Hyderabad, IIIT Allahabad.
If he wants Robotics & AI, consider IIITDM Kancheepuram or NITs offering AI specializations.
If he prefers research-based AI/ML, IIIT Hyderabad is the best.
???? Priority Order (Best to Good Options):
1. IIIT Hyderabad (AI & ML)
2. NIT Trichy / Warangal (CSE or AI)
3. NIT Surathkal / NIT Allahabad (AI/ML)
4. IIIT Allahabad / IIIT Lucknow (AI)
5. IIT Bhilai (AI & DS) / IIITDM Kancheepuram (Robotics)

Dr Dipankar Dutta |815 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Feb 23, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 22, 2025Hindi

Career

Meri 10 or 12 ki marksheet me maa ka naam same h but galt h Ab kase neet ka form bru Kya form barne par mera form reject ho jayega because maa ke documents se meri marksheet me unka naam match nhi ho rha M kase form bru sir Please reply

Ans: Aapke 10th aur 12th ki marksheet me agar maa ka naam galat hai aur unke original documents se match nahi ho raha hai, to NEET form bharne se pehle aapko is issue ko sudharna chahiye.

Dr Dipankar Dutta |815 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Feb 23, 2025

Question by Yash - Feb 22, 2025Hindi

Career

I have 43.89percentile in first attempt JEE(mains) ,in coaching I was in top batch and score like 98-99percentile, but in first session I do not get satisfactory result so can I prepare for second session or move on MHT CET.

Ans: Yes, you should definitely give the second attempt a serious try.

Dr Dipankar Dutta |815 Answers |Ask -Follow

Tech Careers and Skill Development Expert - Answered on Feb 23, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 22, 2025Hindi

Career

My son has got 96.83 percentile in JEE season 1 , open category and HS Tamilnadu. Any chances of getting in NITs?

Ans: With an estimated rank of around 31,700, securing branches like Civil Engineering, Metallurgical and Materials Engineering, or Production Engineering at NIT Trichy under the Home State quota might be feasible.

See more questions »

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Video Reply
Audio Reply

WhatsApp
Facebook
Twitter
Copy link

Delete

Close

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus

Sign up

email

uname

mobile no

Country Code

Mobile number

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

LOGIN

x