Dear Madam, I have been married for 26 years having two sons.
Recently I discovered that my wife was in a relationship for last 11 years.
I was devastated after this new discovery.
After this my wife says sorry and she will move on and break off the relationship. But to my utter dismay the same is going on.
What step do I need to take in this matter?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Have a frank chat about this with your wife.
As much as you hear her side of the story, you need have the space to state yours and how this situation is making you feel. Hear her out too...
Decide for yourself what you want in your marriage now. If you are unprepared to accept this, state it to her clearly and ask her if she is willing to let the other relationship go and come back into the marriage; of course depends on whether you want that or not.
That is why before knowing what to do, you need to ask yourself: What is it that I want? What to do will follow once you know what you want.

All the best!

Ans: Get a divorce. You’re already separated and that reality is something your children are unfortunately already living with. So spare them the rollercoaster of trying to make things work with her again, because it will continue to affect their lives. She obviously isn’t trustworthy.

Ans: Dear Samrat,
I apologize if I am incorrect. But I seem to notice that you keep asking the same question in different ways. It will help if you actually state what is bothering you.
You not willing ;to accept a woman who has relatively happy marriage and children is getting involve with other men despite warning and claiming that he is only friend and jeopardizing her marriage'? Is this about someone that you know? Or is it something that you want to know out of curiosity? If it is only a healthy debate that you seek, I suggest that there are other platforms that encourage answers and responses as a debate. You may want to ask these questions there.
If it is indeed about you having this problem with your wife, then ask so...also as Gurus, it becomes easy for us to address a person's challenge if they come straight to the point. I hope I am making sense.

Ifs and Buts in life are many...are you suspecting that your wife is in a relationship outside of marriage?
I ask because you have mentioned: How will I proceed when I come to know...does this mean that you know or you are expecting this or you have your doubts?
If you know, simply ask her...she does have the responsibility within the marriage to let you know of this.

If you don't know or are playing on your doubts due to your beliefs of: I am unable to accept that a woman getting involved despite warning...Then know that your lack of trust will kill your marriage...

So, my suggestion...do come to the point and ask your question directly. You will be able to leverage this platform better and find a path to your challenges.

All the best!

Ans: It's understandable that your wife's revelation is bothering you, even though the relationship ended before you got married. The key here is that she trusted you enough to share this with you, which shows her commitment to being honest and open in your marriage.

It's important to remember that everyone has a past, and what matters most is the relationship you both have now. Focus on the trust and bond you share today. If you find that these feelings continue to bother you, it might help to have a calm, honest conversation with her about how you're feeling. Express your emotions without blaming or judging, and work together to reassure each other.

If these feelings persist and affect your relationship, seeking guidance from a counselor or therapist could be beneficial. They can help you navigate these emotions and strengthen your bond.