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Kanchan Rai |423 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 07, 2024

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more

Question by srinivas on Jan 07, 2024Hindi

Relationship

Hi, my only son aged 27yrs is in relationship with a girl aged 22yrs and she kept him as guarantor in her home loan of 20 lacs and took personal loan of 5 lacs from my son (which he took from NBFC and gave it to her). This all done without informing any of us in our family. She is from other state and she donot any family members except her single mom. We have undivided family with conservative mind set. Our family members are not willing to accept her in the family as she taking undue advantage from my son and feels untrustworthy....plz advice

Ans: Dear Srinivas,
While it's important to address the concerns within the family, it's also crucial to respect the individual choices and relationships of your adult son. Striking a balance between expressing concerns and allowing autonomy can be challenging but is essential for maintaining a healthy family dynamic Offer support to your son while guiding him about responsible financial decisions. Help him understand the potential consequences of being a guarantor and lending money Seek to understand the dynamics of your son's relationship with the girl. It's essential to know whether they have a stable and healthy relationship or if there are any red flags. Consider having a conversation with the girl to understand her intentions and reasons for involving your son in her financial matters.Keep the conversation respectful and non-confrontational to foster open communication Establish clear boundaries about financial involvement in relationships. Encourage your son to communicate with the family before making significant financial commitments.

RelationshipReply

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Anu Krishna |1350 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 12, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 08, 2024Hindi

Relationship

Hi, my only son aged 27yrs is in relationship with a girl aged 22yrs and she kept him as guarantor in her home loan of 20 lacs and took personal loan of 5 lacs from my son (which he took from NBFC and gave it to her). This all done without informing any of us in our family. She is from other state and she donot have any family members except her single mom. We have undivided family with conservative mind set. Our family members are not willing to accept her in the family as she is taking undue advantage from my son and feels untrustworthy....We have clarified to my son that in such a scenario you have to choose her or us leaving behind everything including the ancestral property. His girlfriend is not accepting him this and told him that she will accept him only if our family members accepts her. This has chaos in our calm and cool nature of our home as our son is throwing the tantrums everyday and disturbing the mental peace of every member of our family. Please advice us what can be done in this scenario as none of our family members are willing to accept her and also not wanting to part away my only son. Thanking you

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Either your family sees her as someone who wants family approval and be happy with it OR you can doubt her as someone who has managed to cheat your son.
Which of it is true, only time will tell...Your son is blinded by love...how can you appeal to him? What can you say that will make him realize that he possibly can be cheated?
One way is to invite her to your home and ask her to come out clean about these money dealings and why your son chose to keep this information away from his family...If you are all convinced about her honesty, it will be easier to accept her into the family; otherwise there is a possibility that your son maybe able to see through her lies...
So, whether she is the right person for your son or not will be better known when you warmly invite her over and without any judgements give her a chance...making sense?

All the best!

Mayank Chandel |1944 Answers |Ask -Follow

IIT-JEE, NEET-UG, SAT, CLAT, CA, CS Exam Expert - Answered on Jan 29, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 20, 2024Hindi

Career

My Daughter doing MBBS and passed First Year, but suddenly we came to know that she has relationship with another NEET aspirant who failed NEET twice, now she wanted to left MBBS and again wanted to give NEET for Government college or better college. But we know that some one including NEET aspirant is misguiding her. Her mind was controlled by that person, after lots of pursual we as parent failed and she threatened us for unwanted results. We already spends Rs 40 Lacs for her Two years fees but failed to pursue her for continue study in MMBS. We are in tremendous pressure, Kindly help and suggest. That persons Parents also involved in misguiding her. All these we came to know after two years of relationship.

Ans: Hello Sir/mam,
Please look for counseling from a professional psychologist.

Ramalingam Kalirajan |7201 Answers |Ask -Follow

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 19, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 19, 2024Hindi

Money

Hi, sorry it's a very long post My mother is 60year old homemaker(nil income) and father is 68yr old retired govt employee (recieving pension).we are 3 children [2 daughters ( all aged between 30-40yr)]to our parents.All of us are married and earning for our livelihood. We sisters are contributing to parents health insurance and other financial things since we started earning and even after marriage ( as my father is an alcoholic too not looking after the household well).Mother has a property in her name given to her by her father as a gift deed. Father had one house and a plot in his name and some ancestral property. Brother went to abroad for studies in 2018 and came back in 2020. He had a girlfriend since his college days( he married to her in 2022, never had objection from anyone of family members ). Since his arrival, he and his girlfriend started involving in all financial matters of my maternal house to the extent he was using my father's debit card for his own use( father says he has given card to brother willfully). Brother wanted to construct a commercial building in my mother's property. He and my father started threatening my mother to register her property ( actually located near Brother's girlfriend house) in name of brother saying if she doesn't agree ,they won't marry off my sister( who got married in 2022 in the presence of grandparents, mother and myself and both my father and brother didn't attend the marriage). They even extracted money from mother's account (which was given now and then to her by me and my sister).During all these process even brother's girlfriend ( wanted a source of income by renting my parents house)also started abusing my mother and involved in all financial matters ( that freedom was given to her by father and brother as my mother was suppressed and we sisters were not aware of things going on). Everything led to the abandonment of my mother who stayed in her friend's place then I brought her to my house. Now after 3 years ( during the course our wellwishers tried counselling and mediation between my father, brother and mother without sisters which didn't work out). my brother got my parents house( and a plot which was in my father's name) registered to his name as a gift deed from my father without informing mother. All the documents of the property gift deeded to my mother by her father is with my brother and father. They are threatening my mother if she enters her own property. Now my mother has no place and income though she had contributed extensively to upliftment of the family all over these years. She ran a grocery store for 15years during which one plot was bought and house was built in that. Another plot was bought after my parents marriage with the help of dowry money given to my father ) but all the properties were registered in my father's name. She has her contribution financially, emotionally and physically. Now doesn't my mother has right to ask back the house and the property given to my brother without her knowledge and to ask for maintenance from my father and also sue all three of them for mental and physical torture..? We sisters want her to lead a peaceful life in her final years of her life.. please guide us.

Ans: Evaluating Your Mother’s Rights

Your mother has been through a lot. Let's explore her legal and financial rights. She deserves to live peacefully in her final years.

Legal Rights Over Property

Your mother owns property gifted by her father. She has full rights over this property. The property can’t be taken without her consent. If your brother and father took documents, this is illegal.

Action Steps for Property

Retrieve Documents: Seek legal help to get back property documents.
Consult a Lawyer: Discuss the possibility of reclaiming the property.
File a Complaint: If threatened, your mother can file a police complaint.
Maintenance from Your Father

Your father has a duty to support your mother. She can claim maintenance from him. This can be done through legal channels.

Action Steps for Maintenance

Seek Legal Advice: A lawyer can help your mother file for maintenance.
Family Court: File a petition in family court for maintenance.
Right to Ancestral Property

Your mother contributed to the family. She can claim a share in ancestral property. The law supports her right to ancestral property.

Action Steps for Ancestral Property

Legal Consultation: Discuss the possibility of claiming ancestral property.
File a Suit: If needed, file a suit for partition of ancestral property.
Mental and Physical Torture

Your mother faced mental and physical torture. This is a serious issue. She can seek legal action against your brother, father, and sister-in-law.

Action Steps for Torture

File a Complaint: Lodge a complaint with the police for harassment.
Protection Orders: Seek protection orders from the court.
Health Insurance and Financial Support

You and your sister have supported your parents. Continue to ensure health insurance coverage. Your mother may need financial support until her rights are restored.

Action Steps for Financial Support

Joint Efforts: Continue supporting your mother financially.
Plan for Future: Set up a fund for your mother’s needs.
Investments for Secure Future

Consider investing in mutual funds for your mother’s secure future. Regular funds with the help of a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) are beneficial. Avoid direct funds due to lack of professional advice.

Benefits of Regular Funds

Professional Management: CFPs manage the funds, ensuring optimal returns.
Less Hassle: No need for your mother to manage investments actively.
Tailored Advice: Investments tailored to her risk profile and needs.
Regular Review of Investments

Regularly review investments with a CFP. Adjust them based on your mother’s needs and market conditions. This ensures her financial security.

Final Insights

Your mother has rights over her property. She can claim maintenance from your father and her share in ancestral property. Legal action can be taken for mental and physical torture. Continue supporting her financially and ensure her health insurance coverage. Invest wisely with professional advice for her secure future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

Latest Questions

Ravi Mittal |450 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 03, 2024Hindi

Relationship

Hello, my wife is Ugandan and I’m of English national, 30 years old and she’s 26, we met nearly a year ago and got married in uk with some of her friends and small family. We haven’t done kuchala (not sure if that’s correct spelling) yet and I’m feeling anxious for when the time comes. She said her family will kneel when they greet me and being white this is already stinging my moral (due to history). I also talked about moving in together before the meet the parents happen however she says she’s rather move in after? Currently this could take two years before going to Uganda, how should I proceed without overstepping her cultural beliefs as after all we are married and by my culture we should already be living together

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It is very nice of you to be so considerate and sensitive while handling these cultural nuances. Let's discuss the kneeling tradition. It's a sign of respect and it's deeply rooted in Ugandan culture. While I understand your point of view, you also have to remember that it can have significant meaning to her and her family. I suggest you politely express your feelings and let her know why it is uncomfortable for you to see her family kneel. When you explain, mention how much her culture means to you as well. I am sure both of you can communicate and come to a compromise that makes you both happy. Just in case, they persist in following the ritual, just look at it as a gesture of love and respect and not submission.

About the moving in together part, in certain parts of the world, couples living together before the traditional wedding is not considered respectful. But since you are already married, you can try explaining to your wife how the living situation does not go against her cultural expectations. But if it is a really big deal for her and her family, consider seeing it from her perspective.

Communication is everything here. Look at every problem as a team; it's not your problem vs her problem. It's both of you vs the problems.

I hope this helps

Ravi Mittal |450 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

Question by jayesh - Nov 27, 2024

Relationship

Iam 42 yrs old and i have crush on a female which board my train and get down the same station. From that day she meet me for a day or so as we share one bus stop for office going. Then afterward she met me once a week or occasionally and iam getting feeling towards her. While on the bus stop if i see her i usually follow her and greet her(for couple of minutes). Today while i was talking i made eye contact with her and she too. And if she see me she allow me to touch her hair and body too Dont know what to do kindly guide me.

Ans: Dear Jayesh,
The best way to confirm if she shares the same feelings for you is to simply ask. Tell her how you feel and ask if she feels anything close to that for you. If she says yes, then you can ask her out on a date- maybe start slow with a cup of coffee and see where it goes. If she says no, then please do not take that as a sign to pursue her some more and convince her.

Hope this helps.

Ravi Mittal |450 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 26, 2024Hindi

Relationship

How can i catch my cheating partner

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
If you know for sure your partner is cheating, the best thing to do is confront them. There's no point in collecting proof or catching them in the act- it will not make them more guilty than they already are. Ask them directly about what you know and try to rethink the relationship. Cheating should not be excused and I am sure you deserve a partner who remains loyal to you.

Best wishes

Ravi Mittal |450 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

Question by Aravinth - Dec 03, 2024Hindi

Relationship

Hi sir I married a other caste girl so my mother and sister not given my share and degree ,I got financial problem and not get any job without my degrees if I ask them they told me to leave the girl otherwise they kill me . what to do how to get my degrees and my share

Ans: Dear Aravinth,
I am so sorry to hear this. Can you try to go to your educational institute and ask for another copy of your degree? If not, I am sure there are legal steps that you can take to secure your degree; after all, you have earned it yourself. About the share, I would recommend consulting a lawyer; they can help you in this situation better. Moreover, if there is any threat to your or your partner’s life, you should consider taking it up with the authorities.

Best wishes.

Radheshyam Zanwar |1088 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

Question by BIPRADAS - Dec 03, 2024Hindi

Career

I have received a job offer from Siecorp ,a Singapore based company though my posting would be at my hometown . They have asked me to submit all credentials related to education & job experiences which is quite normal but they have asked the following documents also which they said would help me to arrange through some agent by payment & the same would be reimbursed during first month of employment . Earlier also another overseas company asked for the same & I denied to make payment before having the job in hand . 1. Construction Health and Safety Technician (CHST) – Compulsory 2. OSHA Safety Certificate – Compulsory 3. Safety Trained Supervisor (STS) – Non-Compulsory Kindly advise whether these certificates are really required to be submitted to join any foreign company or any sort of cheating business regards,

Ans: Hello Bipradas.
From your query, it is clear that you have offered by job by a Singapore-based company and they are giving you a posting in your home town. You did not mention anything about the work culture of the company. It simply indicates that you are supposed to work from home which is always related to computers. I think there is no harm in producing the required documents through an agent if they are offering you a handsome salary. The requirement for documents differs from company to company. There is no harm in submitting the mentioned documents. If have fear in your mind, then please go through the profile of the company in detail before submitting the documents. There are many ways to check the authenticity of the company. There are some chances of cheating, but everybody is not indulged in the same category. But take the steps with utmost precaution.

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Thanks.

Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar |1088 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

Question by Zakir - Nov 26, 2024Hindi

Career

Dear sir My son is studying 2nd year chemical engineering in nitt. Suggest the additional online courses to enhance his career

Ans: Hello Zakir.
Here are some options for your son:
(1) Aspen Plus and Aspen HYSYS (Offered by Udemy or Coursera)
(2) MATLAB for Engineers
(3) Advanced Thermodynamics: Offered by universities like Stanford (Coursera, edX).
(4) Reaction Engineering: A course by the University of Minnesota (Coursera)
(5) Fluid Mechanics and Heat Transfer Fundamentals: NPTEL or Coursera.
(6) Data Science (Udemy and Linkedin learning)
(7) Machine Learning, Offered by universities like MIT (edX)
(8) Sustainable Energy Systems (offered by Coursera)
(9) Green Chemical Engineering: Offered by NPTEL.
(10) Python for Chemical Engineers
And many more.
It is suggested that you please visit the websites of Coursera, edX, Udemy, LinkedIn Learning, and NPTEL for more details.

If satisfied, please like and follow me.
If dissatisfied with the reply, please ask again without hesitation.
Thanks.

Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar |1088 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 26, 2024Hindi

Career

Hello Sir, I'm a student of B.Tech CSE 2nd year I'm confused what to choose please give some suggestion

Ans: Hello dear.
At present, you are in 2nd year and saying that you are confused about what to choose. You have already chosen CSE. Your question is incomplete and not possible to suggest to you what you want. Please ask again with more clarity.

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Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar |1088 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

Question by Munni - Nov 28, 2024Hindi

Career

Hlo sir, My child cracked JEE advance last year and got BS in Applied Geology in IIT Kharagpur. Kindly suggest the right path for placement. What is the scope of the branch mentioned above. Thank you ???? in advance

Ans: Hello Munni.
The right path for placement will be suggested by the placement division of IIT Kharagpur from time to time.. At this early stage, there is no need to take the tension. You have ample time in hand. Related to the score, a BS in Applied Geology from IIT Kharagpur offers a promising huge scope. The scope lies in Geology, resource management, energy, environmental planning, infrastructure development, Mining and Exploration, Hydrogeology, Energy, Environmental Geology, Disaster Risk Assessment, Academia and Research, Infrastructure Development, and many more sectors. A BS has strong career growth and opportunities for innovation and impact. Best of luck for his bright future.
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Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar |1088 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 29, 2024Hindi

Career

I take maths as additional subject in class 12th . Am i eligible for jee advance as there is mention that maths has to be compulsory subject.

Ans: Hello dear.
Yes, you are eligible for JEE Advanced if you take mathematics as an additional subject in Class 12th, provided you fulfill the other eligibility criteria for the exam. For JEE (Adv), you must qualify for mains with the required cut-off and pass the 12th-grade exam with PCM subjects with language as an additional subject or an equivalent examination. Make sure to check the detailed brochure or eligibility criteria for the specific year of JEE Advanced.

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Ramalingam Kalirajan |7201 Answers |Ask -Follow

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 29, 2024Hindi

Money

Hi , I am 46 year old and trying to see if i can take an early retirement in next 2 years. Below is my financial condition; - Mutual fund 40Lakh - FD 30 Lakhs - 2 rental yielding flat with total rent of 55000 per month - Own house with no loan. - PF 80 Lakhs - NPS 10 Lakhs - PPF 20 Lakhs - Term insurance 50Lakhs

Ans: Your financial position shows good planning and discipline.

Assets Summary:

Mutual Funds: Rs 40 lakh
Fixed Deposits: Rs 30 lakh
Rental Income: Rs 55,000 per month from two flats
Own House: Fully paid, no loan liabilities
Provident Fund (PF): Rs 80 lakh
National Pension System (NPS): Rs 10 lakh
Public Provident Fund (PPF): Rs 20 lakh
Term Insurance: Rs 50 lakh
You have built a diversified portfolio across multiple asset classes.

Assessing Early Retirement Feasibility
Early retirement in two years can be achieved with strategic planning.

Key Factors to Evaluate:

Monthly Expenses: Calculate post-retirement expenses, including inflation.
Income Sources: Ensure rental income, investments, and withdrawals meet your needs.
Wealth Growth: Balance corpus growth with income stability.
Monthly Expense Coverage
Assume your future monthly expense is Rs 1.25 lakh.

Existing Income Streams:

Rental Income: Rs 55,000 monthly provides 44% of estimated expenses.
Corpus Withdrawals: Use investments to cover remaining expenses.
Adjust for Inflation:

Plan for a 6% inflation rate to protect purchasing power.
Investment Strategy
Align your portfolio for growth, stability, and liquidity.

Mutual Funds:

Continue investing in equity-oriented funds for long-term growth.
Opt for actively managed funds through Certified Financial Planners.
Avoid index funds; they limit opportunities for alpha generation.
Fixed Deposits:

Reallocate a portion to debt mutual funds for better post-tax returns.
Retain some FDs for emergencies and short-term needs.
NPS and PPF:

Maximise NPS contributions for additional tax savings.
Allow PPF to mature for risk-free, tax-exempt growth.
Corpus Withdrawal Plan
A systematic withdrawal strategy ensures steady income.

Use Systematic Withdrawal Plans (SWP) in mutual funds for monthly cash flow.
Keep withdrawal rates below 4% annually to sustain the corpus.
Children’s Education Planning
Your son’s education may require significant funds.

Steps to Plan for Education Costs:

Use PPF maturity or mutual fund proceeds for higher education.
Avoid using retirement corpus for educational expenses.
Risk Management
Protecting your family is as critical as building wealth.

Term Insurance Coverage:

Rs 50 lakh is adequate for income replacement.
Ensure policies are active and nominees updated.
Health Insurance:

Opt for a comprehensive family floater policy with Rs 20–25 lakh coverage.
Keep health-related emergency funds for additional expenses.
Tax Planning
Efficient tax planning maximises post-retirement income.

Mutual Fund Taxation:

Equity fund LTCG above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.
Short-term gains are taxed at 20%. Plan withdrawals carefully.
Fixed Deposit Interest:

FD interest is taxable as per your slab. Consider this in income planning.
Real Estate Considerations
Your rental flats provide steady income.

Points to Consider:

Avoid further real estate investments for better liquidity.
Keep properties well-maintained to ensure uninterrupted rental income.
Healthcare and Emergency Funds
Unplanned medical costs can affect your finances.

Steps to Safeguard:

Maintain Rs 10–15 lakh in liquid assets for emergencies.
Regularly review health insurance coverage to meet rising costs.
Assessing Early Retirement Timing
Your early retirement is achievable by 48 years with careful execution.

Why This is Feasible:

Rental income and portfolio can meet monthly needs.
A diversified asset base ensures sustainable returns.
Finally
Early retirement is within your reach with disciplined planning.

Review your financial plan annually and adjust for changes in needs or markets.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

See more questions »

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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