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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1330 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 26, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jun 18, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

I am 37 homemaker,having two kid my elder child is girl 8 ,from 3 to 4 yrs our bonding is becoming worst,I consulted so many psychologist bt didn't work,feel so much guilty,her academic performance is also decreasing,don't understand what to do

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
There is not much information from you for me to work on and suggest something effective.
- When you say bonding is becoming worst. what exactly happens?
- 3-4 years back, your girl would have been what. 4 or 5, what could have gone wrong?

Parenting is a lot of work and the responsibility of making it work in the early years is that of a parent. My suggestion would be is to go to someone who is professionally capable and wait for things to work. The professional will suggest a lot of activities for both, the parent and the child to do as tasks at home. I hope all this was done.
Do not be in a hurry as bringing the relationship to a good space takes time. Also, on your part at home, observe when specifically there is a bout of unpleasant behavior from her; it will be something specific.
Children cry out for attention in different ways; observe and you will be able to set things right as a parent. (This is all I can suggest with the little information that I have from you). Hope this helps...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1330 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 15, 2021

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I need your expert advice in parenting my daughter. I am a 45 year old mother having two children, a daughter (aged 10 years) and a son (aged 7 years). My husband is very bad at finance issues and because of that we had some issues with my marriage. So I shifted to my mother's place with my kids and we were not in touch with my husband for quite some time. It’s been six years I have been bringing up my kids with very less support/ no support either from my husband or my mother. Since my husband is not staying with us, my kids have been missing their father. Of late, my husband visits us often and he spends time with the kids whenever possible. Though she is 10 years old, my daughter is not having that level of maturity. She is very illogical and dull. I have been training her in certain household work like sweeping the house, washing her clothes and all. She is doing all the work with no concentration/involvement/interest and so the output is pathetic. She is like that in her studies also. I have been explaining things in a very detailed way even then she is doing things like that. During my childhood no one was there to explain me but for my daughter I am there but she is not understanding the value of it. I am getting frustrated and irritated because of her. My question is since she was missing her father couple of years in the recent past, her behaviour is like this. Is there anything that I can do for her improvement? Shortly she might be starting her puberty cycle and before that I would like to make her logical and smart. I have been consistently trying for this by chatting with her alone but could not see any betterment. Kindly help me out.
Ans: Dear JR, when you say: She is very illogical and dull, what does this mean?

Does she take time to understand things? Or is it that she is being evaluated based on what others her age are doing?

At age 10, do you want a happy child or a child who excels in washing clothes and doing all your housework.

Sharing responsibilities at home is perfectly fine, but to judge your child based on that by saying: ‘output is pathetic’ only demoralizes the child further.

She possibly has missed her father all these years and what you need to do is fill it with more love, care and what is the point in driving the point that you didn’t have anyone and she has you and she has to understand the value of this.

She is 10, please allow her to be her age and feel free with each of you.

Create an environment that is loving and caring and supporting from both parents will enable her to relax, be cheerful, grow and be active. And this environment is not for any sort of evaluation or to see a favourable behaviour from her in return.

In a few years from now, she will be hitting puberty.

Let her walk into that phase with confidence and pride rather than self-doubt and shame. I am sure that as a mother you know how important that time is for a young girl.

Start thinking of how to be back together as a family as it isn’t easy for you as well to be away from your husband.

This could also be adding to your stress and maybe it comes out in different ways.

Be with your daughter, love her and encourage her and even after that, you see that there is a challenge, then maybe it’s time to visit a professional who can step in and help.

Happy parenting and be well and stress-free!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1330 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 02, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi Anu, I am 45 year old and married from last 16 years and having 15 year old daughter . My Wife and I didn't have a good relation, We fight a lot, not sure what ever I speak she didn't like it and some how converted into argument , My wife is 10 year younger to me , I used to have good sex life at-least few year back, but relation was not good that time too, some how she is either having feeling of superiority or not sure what , She always blames me or my daughter if any things happen, she didn't ready to accept that she can be wrong . Previously even we used to have fight but overall things was fine , she used to generally fight but some how we do makeup after fight , now situation is out of control, she didn't accept her mistake and try to blame me for all the problem , she do over spend and if I try to control she start fighting, I think she just fight for what ever things she need for her selves , but always criticized / blame other , She pick up fight very easily with any one , She even fight a lot with our daughter . Even daughter some time suggest to go separate road than only she will understand , I try to go for concealing but no help , there also when used to discuss problem she hardly listen , even Councilor told her she must develop habit to listen others but nothing improve, I am not sure how to tackle this , She always sleep alone and if any disturbance she create ruckus , she want the things her own way if not than she can't tolerate . I am not sure but I need help here and problem after covid is more now , I try to manage these things previously but looks I don't have patience to handle this any more, I didn't like people blaming for no reason, it looks some time after doing so much for family I am nothing for my family and it is hurting me more. I will not say that I didn't fight , I do and mainly when I feel broken I shout on her and some time asked her to live the house , This may be as she always says she is looking for some one once she find she will leave the house , She always give threat and always say she didn't love me , She didn't find me attractive enough . She try to create environment where I should feel that I am not important person as well as social , I can write 10 more page around this but wanted to have some solution , not sure what could be best here . I wrote previously too but have not got any response yet.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I suggest that the two of you go and see a marriage therapist. This is not simply the job of a counselor; there is clearly a breakdown in the way your marriage is functioning...it needs both of you to build the marriage back again and the therapist will be able to see and review both sides and suggest/guide you two correctly.

10 or 20 pages are not going to help; what will help is that both of you sit down and think of why you are married and what you can do to rebuild it. Blaming her or yourself isn't anyway going to help...Rather than listing down each others' faults, try to work at this.

All the best!

..Read more

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Milind

Milind Vadjikar  |714 Answers  |Ask -

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Nov 28, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 27, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hello Sir, I really appreciate the advice received from you to my query. Bases on your feedback, I have decided to replan the mutual funds investments and hence will request your invaluable suggestion on wealth building for the next 10 years. I am 45 years old and the objective is to work for another 10 years and accumulate a corpus of around 2.5 CRS. My existing take home salary is Rs 1.25 lacs per month and additional variable income ( incentives ) of around Rs 3 to 4 lacs annually. My existing EFP accumulation is Rs 38,18,711 and it should continue to add for another 10 years. My existing PPF accumulation is Rs 24,69,961, having started from April, 2011 and I wish to continue it for another 10 years with Rs 1.5 lacs deposit per year. Following are my ongoing LICs maturity plans :- Jeevan Anand, Maturity year - 2032, Sum assured - Rs 8 lacs Jeevan Ankur, Maturity year - 2034, Sum assured - Rs 12 lacs Jeevan Saral, Maturity year - 2035, Sum assured - Rs 352,330 Money back policy, Maturity year - 2027, Sum assured - Rs 2lacs + vested bonds My existing LIC annual premium is Rs 135,661 My existing corpus if mutual fund is around Rs 4 lacs, regret not having started investing in mutual funds earlier. Following are the SIPs I intend to realign from January, 2025 to at least till December, 20234, per month Parag Pariekh Flexicap - Rs 20,000 Quant Active Fund - Rs 10,000 SBI Smallcap - Rs 5,000 Nippon India Smallcap - Rs 5,000 ICICI Prudential Bluchip - Rs 5,000 Mirae Asset Large and Midcap - Rs 5,000 Overviewing, the entire details, please share your opinions and suggestions for wealth building for the next 10 years.
Ans: Hello;

Your EPF corpus, PPF contribution+ corpus and MF sip corpus together will provide you a corpus of 2.5 Cr+ over 10 years. (8%, 6.9% & 12% returns considered respectively)

Maturity proceeds of endowment life insurance policies, if any, is a surplus.

Do invest part of your annual incentives as lumpsum investment in the sip funds to boost your corpus.

Also always bear in mind to never mix investment with insurance.

For life insurance an adequate term life cover is good enough.

Endowment policies have the worst returns.

SIP funds are okay except multicap fund, which you may replace with any other top quartile fund from that category, since that fund AMC has an ongoing sebi probe into frontrunning allegations.

Happy Investing;
X: @mars_invest

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7167 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 28, 2024

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Money
Hi everyone, I'm Prem, a 21-year-old pursuing higher education abroad, planning to settle in India in 7-8 years. My goal is to beat the inflation & to accumulate at least 2 crore rupees over the next 15 or 20 years through monthly SIPs of 6,000 rupees for the initial 2 years, increasing to 8,000 rupees thereafter. I have a moderate-to-high risk tolerance(60/40 60-safe;40-risky) and am comfortable with market volatility. I'm seeking advice on a diversified investment strategy to achieve my goal, including fund recommendations and tax-efficient approaches. Any specific tips on maximizing returns and minimizing risk would be greatly appreciated.
Ans: It is inspiring to see a young investor like you with clear financial goals. Planning for Rs. 2 crore in 15-20 years through disciplined SIPs is achievable with the right approach. Here’s a detailed, 360-degree plan to align with your goals and risk profile.

Set a Strong Foundation
Goal Clarity: Your goal is to accumulate Rs. 2 crore. This is a long-term goal. The timeline allows you to leverage equity's compounding potential.

Investment Tenure: A 15-20 year horizon suits your moderate-to-high risk tolerance. This provides time to recover from market corrections.

Risk Tolerance: A 60/40 risk allocation (safe/risky) is balanced. It provides growth while limiting downside risks.

SIP Strategy
Start Gradually: Begin with Rs. 6,000 monthly for the first two years. Increase to Rs. 8,000 thereafter. Periodic increases (step-up SIPs) every year or two will help.

Allocation Split: Invest 60% in equity funds for growth and 40% in debt funds for stability. This aligns with your risk profile.

Equity Fund Allocation
Large and Mid-Cap Funds: These funds offer a blend of stability and growth. They are suitable for moderate risk-takers.

Flexi-Cap Funds: They provide diversified exposure across market caps, reducing concentration risk.

Small-Cap Funds: Allocate a smaller portion here. Small caps have higher growth potential but also higher volatility.

Debt Fund Allocation
Hybrid Funds: These funds maintain a balance between equity and debt. They are less volatile and provide steady returns.

Short-Duration Funds: Suitable for stable returns in volatile markets. These can be part of your low-risk portfolio.

Tax-Efficient Investments
Equity Funds: Hold for over one year to qualify for long-term capital gains (LTCG) tax benefits. LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh annually is taxed at 12.5%.

Debt Funds: Gains are taxed as per your income slab. Holding for over three years qualifies for indexation benefits.

Recommendations for Maximizing Returns
Step-Up SIPs: Increase your SIPs by 10% yearly. This small increment can significantly impact your corpus.

Diversification: Diversify across sectors, fund houses, and geographies. Avoid over-concentration in one segment.

Rebalancing: Review your portfolio every year. Shift funds to maintain the 60/40 equity-to-debt ratio.

Risk Management
Emergency Fund: Maintain six months’ expenses in a liquid fund. This ensures your SIPs continue during emergencies.

Term Insurance: Get a term plan covering 10-15 times your annual expenses. This protects your dependents financially.

Health Insurance: Opt for comprehensive health insurance to avoid draining your investments for medical needs.

The Disadvantage of Index Funds
Index funds often mimic market indices. However, actively managed funds offer better potential returns. Experienced fund managers can identify high-growth opportunities and avoid underperforming stocks.

Benefits of Investing through a Certified Financial Planner
Personalised Advice: Regular plans through a CFP offer tailored strategies. Direct funds lack professional guidance.

Portfolio Monitoring: CFPs monitor performance and suggest timely adjustments. Direct investors may miss this.

Holistic Planning: CFPs integrate your investments with your overall financial goals. This ensures alignment with life stages.

Tips for Achieving Rs. 2 Crore
Stay Invested: Avoid redeeming funds prematurely. Long-term discipline builds wealth.

Avoid Timing the Market: Focus on consistent investments instead of predicting highs and lows.

Leverage Compounding: The earlier you invest, the greater the compounding benefits.

Finally
Achieving Rs. 2 crore in 15-20 years is realistic. Stick to your SIPs, review your plan, and stay disciplined. Your vision, combined with a strategic approach, will help you beat inflation and achieve financial independence.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7167 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 28, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 28, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hello sir, we are a 42 years old couple with 2 kids( 12 and 10 years old)with in hand salary of 6.5L in hand post tax. We have current savings of 1.2 Cr in equity, 55L in debt, 20L in gold, 25L in NPS and 2.5 cr in real estate (which we don't consider as liquid). Our primary target is around 5cr corpus for retirement around 60 years of age, 4cr for kids higher education,1cr for marriage and a house after 15years approx. Currently we are able to invest 2L/ month in MF, 30k/month in debt and 1 L/month in NPS. We have an EMI of 1L/ month for 6 years for the loan of a commercial property which is not giving any rent at present.We have sufficient health and life insurance.Till now our goals seemed reachable but now we are having thoughts of sending both kids to boarding which will cost us around 1L monthly for around 6 years with 6 %inflation extra each year costing us around 80-85L extra. Can we afford this extra expense without compromising our other goals.Kindly advice.
Ans: Your financial position is strong with diverse investments.

You have Rs 1.2 crore in equity, Rs 55 lakh in debt, Rs 20 lakh in gold, Rs 25 lakh in NPS, and Rs 2.5 crore in real estate.

A monthly savings capacity of Rs 3.3 lakh is impressive, even with a Rs 1 lakh EMI.

Adequate health and life insurance adds financial security.

Evaluation of Goals
Retirement Corpus

Your target of Rs 5 crore by 60 years seems achievable with current savings.
Continuing with Rs 2 lakh monthly in mutual funds (MFs) and Rs 1 lakh in NPS will help.
Children’s Higher Education

Rs 4 crore for higher education can be managed.
Your equity exposure supports long-term growth.
Marriage Expenses

A target of Rs 1 crore for marriages is realistic.
Investments in debt and gold provide stability for such goals.
Buying a House

A house after 15 years will need detailed planning.
A mix of equity and debt over time can address this goal.
Impact of Boarding School Expense
Boarding will cost Rs 80-85 lakh over six years, considering 6% inflation.
This is a significant expense during a critical saving period.
Possible Adjustments
Reassess Short-Term Investments

Reduce monthly MF investment by Rs 1 lakh temporarily.
Divert this amount for boarding expenses.
Prioritise Debt Investments

Continue Rs 30,000 monthly in debt funds.
Use this allocation later for school-related costs.
Revisit Commercial Property

Check potential for renting out the property.
Even a partial rental can ease the EMI burden.
Utilise Surplus Assets

Gold can be partially liquidated in emergencies.
Avoid selling equity to preserve long-term growth.
Insights on Mutual Funds and NPS
Actively managed mutual funds outperform index funds in Indian markets.

Professional fund management adapts to market changes effectively.

NPS is tax-efficient for retirement planning.

Continue the Rs 1 lakh monthly contribution to maximise benefits.

Tax Implications
Be mindful of new taxation rules on MFs.
LTCG on equity above Rs 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.
Debt fund gains are taxed as per your income slab.
Strategic Plan
Allocate Rs 1 lakh monthly from MF contributions for school fees.
Invest Rs 1 lakh in equity MFs and Rs 30,000 in debt MFs monthly.
Retain the NPS contribution of Rs 1 lakh per month.
Alternative Options
Evaluate less expensive boarding schools without compromising quality.
Explore scholarships or partial funding options.
Avoid real estate investments for liquidity concerns.
Emergency Fund Planning
Ensure six months’ expenses as an emergency fund.
Keep this amount in liquid or debt funds for easy access.
Final Insights
You can afford the boarding school expense with minor adjustments.
Maintain focus on long-term goals with disciplined investments.
Revisit your plan every two years to ensure alignment.
Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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