Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help

Betrayed by Trust: Should I Stay in This Financially Oriented Marriage?

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1203 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 19, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Aug 15, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship

I am a 36-year-old woman who deeply valued the sanctity of marriage. I chose my husband carefully, valuing his polite nature, strong character, and religious values over material wealth, believing I had found a partner who aligned with my values.However, shortly after the marriage, I noticed red flags. His family seemed overly focused on my financial status, I overlooked all the taunts , disrespect everything initially, believing that as long as my husband was good to me, I could adjust. I treated his family as my own, I always buys them thoughtful gifts but that were never acknowledged or appreciated, even though my husband has never bought me any gifts to date. Despite this, I felt undeserving of their negativity.A few weeks into the marriage, I realized that my husband’s interest was also more about my financial contributions than love. He avoided responsibility and showed little concern for our future. Although he presents himself as a man of strong religious values, these values disappear when financial and cultural issues arise. He treats me like an outsider, and our relationship feels more like that of roommates.When I began to take a stand, things worsened. He failed to validate my emotions, frequently starting arguments and using hurtful language. He turns into something else during arguments, which scares me. Most of the time he treats me poorly, I even had to beg for his time . He also shares our private matters with his family, creating tension and emboldening their disrespect. Despite my efforts to bridge the gap, he remained silent when his mother disrespected me infrontof him, failing to defend me.My growing insecurity about losing my job, which is crucial for financial stability, has driven me to focus more on my career, even though I once prioritized family over everything.After almost 3 years of trying, I find myself in a situation I never imagined. The love and respect I hoped for are absent, and separation, once unthinkable, now seems possible. One part of me has accepted remaining alone forever rather than compromising my values or having children with such a man, while another part still hopes he might change if he starts loving me truly, despite doubts he will ever stand up for me as he only wants to be a good son.Should I stay in this marriage and work through the issues, or is it time to leave?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Ask yourself:
What if I stay in this marriage, what will gain and what will I lose?
What if I walk out of this marriage, what will I gain and what will I lose?

Given that you have seen the Red Flags and for reasons, you still are left wondering what you should be doing...Of course, if you feel that things might improve, your husband first needs to acknowledge that he has to change and also understand why he has to change. Right now, the way you describe, he seems to be on his own trip behaving oddly enough and not as a husband must. Do what needs to be done for him to realize this and also for the sake of your own sanity, do put a timeline to this entire thing, so that your patience is not tested. After that, you will have known that you have everything and more in order for him to realize and change and then taking decisions become easier and purposeful

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1203 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 05, 2022

Relationship
I want to keep it anonymous.I am a 30 years old independent woman married for 5 months only.My husband and I were in same college but were not friends.He had been approaching me for getting married since 2017, but every time I had rejected his proposal, later in February, 2021 I talked to him openly and mentioned my inability to conceive if we get married.To which his response was that he really liked me and is ready to accept me with my inability.I made our families met and we got engaged.During the one year of courtship period, initial 4-5 months were peaceful, but he and I were missing a bond, yet we thought may be with time we will find it.After the initial phase as we started meeting for family functions.He started finding flaws in me. Things like, I stare at other men when I go out, I don’t give him priority, why do I talk to any male friend beyond necessity, why do I praise my senior at office parties etc.He started controlling me in these areas and used to get angry if I talk to my siblings late night.I started feeling trapped and suffocated, and always under the fear that any of my action could make my husband angry.In that anger he seemed like a very different person, someone aggressive.We started fighting, arguing over petty things.He wanted me to change but I was reluctant as those were very normal things for me and I started telling him that this relationship is not working.We are two persons with different mindset and ideologies and since we are unable to reach to a solution over any issue, let’s call it off.I tried to call this wedding off for like 6 times, but he never agreed to this stating that he loves me and he will change his attitude and will not stop me from doing anything.Whenever I tried to break up with him he'd start crying, stating things like you are my only happiness in life, and I would die without you and all.I involved my family into the matter and shared things with them.They used to call my husband to make him understand my expectations from him.In front of them my husband used to admit that he would change his behaviour.He used to stay calm for 5-6 days and then continue with the same attitude.Basically, it was an on and off behaviour from his side and because of that my behaviour was also affected.I was trying to see his positive side as he had accepted me with my inability, so he must be a good person.Somehow, after so many issues, we got married.After marriage, we went for honeymoon, but he showed a different attitude.He started insulting me that I stare at other people, including the waiter.He would fight with me aggressively, and when I cry he'd calm me down stating that this fight is my fault; had I not done this he would not have fought; had I obeyed him he would not have gotten angry. Then he used to make love to me.For 4 days this happened continuously.On the 4th day I told him I cannot stand him and bear his mind numbing torture.If he sees so many flaws in my character we must part our ways, and there is not point of staying together.He agreed but later he started apologising, asking for another chance to this marriage. I agreed.But his behaviour didn’t improve much. We used to live with his parents, he started taking active participation in local politics which used to keep him busy.He started controlling me indirectly for visiting my moms and relatives.He'd taunt me for not sharing my salary with his parents.Later I found out his work is not running smooth and he is not making enough.The issue of staring at men and shaking hands with men while greeting congratulations, was also an issue to him.He'd remain normal as long as I did things as per his wish.If I said or did anything opposite, he'd get aggressive and disrespectful towards me.Love was nowhere around. He never said I am a good looking woman. My husband rarely complimented me though I get many whenever I go out.He seemed not to be bothered about me except for the time I do something he doesn’t like.My mom also supported him. His behaviour started taking a toll on my mental condition and I started feeling uncomfortable around him.I stopped being physical as I was feeling emotionally detached.The fights had broken me, my bare minimum expectations were not fulfilled.My husband also broke relations with my family and was disrespectful to them.Initially he had promised that I will be free to visit my mom whenever I want and he will not seek my salary ever or doubt my character, but nothing turned to be true.After 4 months of torture, I came to my mom's place and told my husband that I cannot live with him.I actually feel much better without him. As soon as he knew that I am leaving him he has surrendered and is admitting that he made mistakes and doesn’t want to lose me.He says I am his only hope in life and he loves me a lot and can’t live without me.He does the same emotional drama every time I try to part ways with him.My family is pressurising me to give him another chance. But my trust is shattered beyond repair.He made my cry, he pushed me into depression.I do not respect him. He accepted me with my inability, but I feel he never liked the real me.He is not ready to admit this fact that we have not been good for each other.To me he seems like a male chauvinist, a dominating and controlling person.He stays grumpy most of the time, behaves well with others but is arrogant with family members.What do I do? I am in utter confusion, I am unable to force myself into a love-less marriage and my family and husband doesn’t understand it.(I am a government officer and my husband runs a small business)
Ans:

Dear MK,

This is a classic case of crying out, blaming the spouse for the crying and sending her on a guilt trip, promising to do better, not following through and when she walks out, crying out again.

It's cyclical and traps you within in the loop.

He really needs to work out his stuff with a professional, else this is going to be something that you have to deal with repeatedly.

To not be able to take responsibility for his actions, shifting blame onto you, acting insecure and preventing you from leading your life the way that you are used to -- like talking to your family and friends -- are all red flags.

Step up, take charge and suggest that he goes to a professional if he wants the marriage to work.

If he doesn’t and continues the same way, you know what you must do to secure yourself and your life.

All the best!

    ..Read more

    Anu

    Anu Krishna  |1203 Answers  |Ask -

    Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 05, 2022

    Relationship
    I want to keep it anonymous.I am a 30 years old independent woman married for 5 months only.My husband and I were in same college but were not friends.He had been approaching me for getting married since 2017, but every time I had rejected his proposal, later in February, 2021 I talked to him openly and mentioned my inability to conceive if we get married.To which his response was that he really liked me and is ready to accept me with my inability.I made our families met and we got engaged.During the one year of courtship period, initial 4-5 months were peaceful, but he and I were missing a bond, yet we thought may be with time we will find it.After the initial phase as we started meeting for family functions.He started finding flaws in me. Things like, I stare at other men when I go out, I don’t give him priority, why do I talk to any male friend beyond necessity, why do I praise my senior at office parties etc.He started controlling me in these areas and used to get angry if I talk to my siblings late night.I started feeling trapped and suffocated, and always under the fear that any of my action could make my husband angry.In that anger he seemed like a very different person, someone aggressive.We started fighting, arguing over petty things.He wanted me to change but I was reluctant as those were very normal things for me and I started telling him that this relationship is not working.We are two persons with different mindset and ideologies and since we are unable to reach to a solution over any issue, let’s call it off.I tried to call this wedding off for like 6 times, but he never agreed to this stating that he loves me and he will change his attitude and will not stop me from doing anything.Whenever I tried to break up with him he'd start crying, stating things like you are my only happiness in life, and I would die without you and all.I involved my family into the matter and shared things with them.They used to call my husband to make him understand my expectations from him.In front of them my husband used to admit that he would change his behaviour.He used to stay calm for 5-6 days and then continue with the same attitude.Basically, it was an on and off behaviour from his side and because of that my behaviour was also affected.I was trying to see his positive side as he had accepted me with my inability, so he must be a good person.Somehow, after so many issues, we got married.After marriage, we went for honeymoon, but he showed a different attitude.He started insulting me that I stare at other people, including the waiter.He would fight with me aggressively, and when I cry he'd calm me down stating that this fight is my fault; had I not done this he would not have fought; had I obeyed him he would not have gotten angry. Then he used to make love to me.For 4 days this happened continuously.On the 4th day I told him I cannot stand him and bear his mind numbing torture.If he sees so many flaws in my character we must part our ways, and there is not point of staying together.He agreed but later he started apologising, asking for another chance to this marriage. I agreed.But his behaviour didn’t improve much. We used to live with his parents, he started taking active participation in local politics which used to keep him busy.He started controlling me indirectly for visiting my moms and relatives.He'd taunt me for not sharing my salary with his parents.Later I found out his work is not running smooth and he is not making enough.The issue of staring at men and shaking hands with men while greeting congratulations, was also an issue to him.He'd remain normal as long as I did things as per his wish.If I said or did anything opposite, he'd get aggressive and disrespectful towards me.Love was nowhere around. He never said I am a good looking woman. My husband rarely complimented me though I get many whenever I go out.He seemed not to be bothered about me except for the time I do something he doesn’t like.My mom also supported him. His behaviour started taking a toll on my mental condition and I started feeling uncomfortable around him.I stopped being physical as I was feeling emotionally detached.The fights had broken me, my bare minimum expectations were not fulfilled.My husband also broke relations with my family and was disrespectful to them.Initially he had promised that I will be free to visit my mom whenever I want and he will not seek my salary ever or doubt my character, but nothing turned to be true.After 4 months of torture, I came to my mom's place and told my husband that I cannot live with him.I actually feel much better without him. As soon as he knew that I am leaving him he has surrendered and is admitting that he made mistakes and doesn’t want to lose me.He says I am his only hope in life and he loves me a lot and can’t live without me.He does the same emotional drama every time I try to part ways with him.My family is pressurising me to give him another chance. But my trust is shattered beyond repair.He made my cry, he pushed me into depression.I do not respect him. He accepted me with my inability, but I feel he never liked the real me.He is not ready to admit this fact that we have not been good for each other.To me he seems like a male chauvinist, a dominating and controlling person.He stays grumpy most of the time, behaves well with others but is arrogant with family members.What do I do? I am in utter confusion, I am unable to force myself into a love-less marriage and my family and husband doesn’t understand it.(I am a government officer and my husband runs a small business)

    ..Read more

    Anu

    Anu Krishna  |1203 Answers  |Ask -

    Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 05, 2022

    Relationship
    I want to keep it anonymous.I am a 30 years old independent woman married for 5 months only.My husband and I were in same college but were not friends.He had been approaching me for getting married since 2017, but every time I had rejected his proposal, later in February, 2021 I talked to him openly and mentioned my inability to conceive if we get married.To which his response was that he really liked me and is ready to accept me with my inability.I made our families met and we got engaged.During the one year of courtship period, initial 4-5 months were peaceful, but he and I were missing a bond, yet we thought may be with time we will find it.After the initial phase as we started meeting for family functions.He started finding flaws in me. Things like, I stare at other men when I go out, I don’t give him priority, why do I talk to any male friend beyond necessity, why do I praise my senior at office parties etc.He started controlling me in these areas and used to get angry if I talk to my siblings late night.I started feeling trapped and suffocated, and always under the fear that any of my action could make my husband angry.In that anger he seemed like a very different person, someone aggressive.We started fighting, arguing over petty things.He wanted me to change but I was reluctant as those were very normal things for me and I started telling him that this relationship is not working.We are two persons with different mindset and ideologies and since we are unable to reach to a solution over any issue, let’s call it off.I tried to call this wedding off for like 6 times, but he never agreed to this stating that he loves me and he will change his attitude and will not stop me from doing anything.Whenever I tried to break up with him he'd start crying, stating things like you are my only happiness in life, and I would die without you and all.I involved my family into the matter and shared things with them.They used to call my husband to make him understand my expectations from him.In front of them my husband used to admit that he would change his behaviour.He used to stay calm for 5-6 days and then continue with the same attitude.Basically, it was an on and off behaviour from his side and because of that my behaviour was also affected.I was trying to see his positive side as he had accepted me with my inability, so he must be a good person.Somehow, after so many issues, we got married.After marriage, we went for honeymoon, but he showed a different attitude.He started insulting me that I stare at other people, including the waiter.He would fight with me aggressively, and when I cry he'd calm me down stating that this fight is my fault; had I not done this he would not have fought; had I obeyed him he would not have gotten angry. Then he used to make love to me.For 4 days this happened continuously.On the 4th day I told him I cannot stand him and bear his mind numbing torture.If he sees so many flaws in my character we must part our ways, and there is not point of staying together.He agreed but later he started apologising, asking for another chance to this marriage. I agreed.But his behaviour didn’t improve much. We used to live with his parents, he started taking active participation in local politics which used to keep him busy.He started controlling me indirectly for visiting my moms and relatives.He'd taunt me for not sharing my salary with his parents.Later I found out his work is not running smooth and he is not making enough.The issue of staring at men and shaking hands with men while greeting congratulations, was also an issue to him.He'd remain normal as long as I did things as per his wish.If I said or did anything opposite, he'd get aggressive and disrespectful towards me.Love was nowhere around. He never said I am a good looking woman. My husband rarely complimented me though I get many whenever I go out.He seemed not to be bothered about me except for the time I do something he doesn’t like.My mom also supported him. His behaviour started taking a toll on my mental condition and I started feeling uncomfortable around him.I stopped being physical as I was feeling emotionally detached.The fights had broken me, my bare minimum expectations were not fulfilled.My husband also broke relations with my family and was disrespectful to them.Initially he had promised that I will be free to visit my mom whenever I want and he will not seek my salary ever or doubt my character, but nothing turned to be true.After 4 months of torture, I came to my mom's place and told my husband that I cannot live with him.I actually feel much better without him. As soon as he knew that I am leaving him he has surrendered and is admitting that he made mistakes and doesn’t want to lose me.He says I am his only hope in life and he loves me a lot and can’t live without me.He does the same emotional drama every time I try to part ways with him.My family is pressurising me to give him another chance. But my trust is shattered beyond repair.He made my cry, he pushed me into depression.I do not respect him. He accepted me with my inability, but I feel he never liked the real me.He is not ready to admit this fact that we have not been good for each other.To me he seems like a male chauvinist, a dominating and controlling person.He stays grumpy most of the time, behaves well with others but is arrogant with family members.What do I do? I am in utter confusion, I am unable to force myself into a love-less marriage and my family and husband doesn’t understand it.(I am a government officer and my husband runs a small business)
    Ans:

    Dear MK,

    This is a classic case of crying out, blaming the spouse for the crying and sending her on a guilt trip, promising to do better, not following through and when she walks out, crying out again.

    It's cyclical and traps you within in the loop.

    He really needs to work out his stuff with a professional, else this is going to be something that you have to deal with repeatedly.

    To not be able to take responsibility for his actions, shifting blame onto you, acting insecure and preventing you from leading your life the way that you are used to -- like talking to your family and friends -- are all red flags.

    Step up, take charge and suggest that he goes to a professional if he wants the marriage to work.

    If he doesn’t and continues the same way, you know what you must do to secure yourself and your life.

    All the best!

    ..Read more

    Latest Questions
    Ramalingam

    Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6630 Answers  |Ask -

    Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Oct 16, 2024

    Asked by Anonymous - Oct 15, 2024Hindi
    Money
    I would appreciate it if you could suggest a best financial strategy for building a 2CR corpus in the next 10 years. I am 34 years old and have a total of 15 lakhs in loans for personal and credit cards. I had a corpus of 10 lakhs in FD before Covid but had to use it due to medical emergencies. I would like to start again with my current salary of 70k, with 35k going towards my loans and 5k going towards groceries.
    Ans: Building a Rs. 2 Crore Corpus in 10 Years
    Age: 34 | Current Salary: Rs. 70,000 per month
    Total Loan: Rs. 15 Lakhs (Personal + Credit Cards)

    You aim to build a Rs. 2 crore corpus in 10 years, despite having loans and a limited current surplus. Achieving this goal requires a balanced financial strategy. I will suggest a detailed, 360-degree plan for you, focusing on debt reduction, systematic investments, and discipline.

    Current Situation Assessment
    Salary: Rs. 70,000 per month
    Loans: Rs. 15 lakhs
    Loan EMIs: Rs. 35,000 per month
    Grocery expenses: Rs. 5,000 per month
    Available Surplus: Rs. 30,000 per month
    You already have Rs. 35,000 going towards loans and Rs. 5,000 towards groceries. This leaves you with Rs. 30,000 to work with monthly. Here’s how you can manage this amount effectively.

    Step 1: Prioritize Debt Repayment
    Your primary focus should be to clear high-interest loans first. Personal and credit card loans usually have high-interest rates. These loans could eat into your savings if not managed carefully.

    Allocate Rs. 25,000 from your surplus for loan repayment.
    Focus on credit card debt first, as it is likely the costliest loan.
    If possible, opt for balance transfer or debt consolidation to reduce the interest burden on these loans.
    Step 2: Emergency Fund Creation
    Given your past medical emergency, it's important to build an emergency fund. This will act as a financial cushion for unforeseen events.

    Allocate Rs. 5,000 per month from your available Rs. 30,000 surplus.
    Aim to accumulate 6 months of your expenses, which should be around Rs. 2 lakh.
    Keep this amount in a liquid fund or high-interest savings account for easy access.
    After clearing loans, you can increase this allocation further.

    Step 3: Systematic Investment Plan (SIP) for Wealth Creation
    Once your loans are under control, you will have more surplus to invest. To achieve Rs. 2 crore in 10 years, Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs) will play a key role. Here’s how to begin.

    Start by investing Rs. 5,000 to Rs. 7,000 monthly in mutual funds initially.

    Large-Cap Mutual Funds: Stable returns and lower risk.
    Flexi-Cap Mutual Funds: Offers a mix of large, mid, and small-cap exposure.
    You can gradually increase this SIP as you free up more funds after repaying the loans.

    Step 4: Focus on Retirement through NPS
    You are 34 now and should also begin thinking about retirement savings alongside other goals.

    Consider investing in the National Pension System (NPS).
    You can allocate Rs. 2,000 to Rs. 3,000 per month towards NPS.
    It has tax benefits under Section 80C, and the returns from equity exposure can help in long-term wealth building.
    Step 5: Use Tax Savings to Boost Investments
    Maximize tax-saving opportunities to increase your investment potential.

    Section 80C: You can invest in ELSS mutual funds for tax-saving purposes, PPF, or NPS.
    Health Insurance Premiums: Take advantage of Section 80D for your and your family’s health insurance.
    Any tax refunds or savings should be channelled back into your SIPs to boost wealth creation.
    Step 6: Revisit and Reduce Insurance Burden (If any)
    If you have LIC policies, especially those that combine insurance and investment, assess their performance.

    If the returns are low, consider surrendering them and reinvesting in mutual funds.
    Get a pure term insurance for adequate life cover at a lower cost, which won’t affect your long-term savings.
    This strategy helps in cost optimization, leaving more for investments.

    Step 7: Regularly Increase SIP Contributions
    As your salary increases or once you have cleared your loans, step up your SIP contributions. To reach Rs. 2 crore in 10 years, you will need to invest aggressively.

    You can follow the 10% rule for SIP step-ups each year.
    As a benchmark, an Rs. 30,000 per month SIP in the long term (post-loan repayment) can significantly increase your chances of achieving your goal.
    Step 8: Review and Monitor Performance
    Financial plans should be flexible and adaptable. As market conditions change, periodically review your investments to ensure they are on track.

    Annually review the performance of your mutual funds with your Certified Financial Planner (CFP).
    Shift from underperforming funds to better options if required, but always stay consistent with your investment goals.
    Finally: Achieving Your Goal of Rs. 2 Crore
    Based on the above steps, let’s consider the long-term picture:

    Clearing debt in the next 3-4 years will free up a large chunk of your income.
    Increasing your SIP gradually to Rs. 30,000 - Rs. 35,000 per month after clearing debt will set you on track to achieve the Rs. 2 crore target.
    Stay disciplined and review your portfolio regularly to adjust to changing circumstances.
    Best Regards,

    K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
    Chief Financial Planner,
    www.holisticinvestment.in
    https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

    ...Read more

    Ramalingam

    Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6630 Answers  |Ask -

    Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Oct 16, 2024

    Asked by Anonymous - Oct 16, 2024Hindi
    Money
    Hello Sir, i have got three properties (Property 1,Flat, value around 1.5 Cr. no loan. Property 2,Office, value around 2 Cr, no loan. Property 3,Flat, Value around 4 Crs, loan 1.5 Crs). I am staying currently in property 1 and planning to shift to property 3. Rental expected from property 1 and 2 is 50k and 80k respectively. So question is should i continue the loan on property 3 or should I clear that loan by selling either of property 1 or 2.Thanks in advance.
    Ans: Understanding Your Current Scenario
    You own three properties with no loans on two of them:

    Property 1 (Flat): Valued at Rs 1.5 crore.
    Property 2 (Office): Valued at Rs 2 crore.
    Property 3 (Flat): Valued at Rs 4 crore, with a Rs 1.5 crore loan.
    You are planning to shift from Property 1 to Property 3. You also expect rental income of Rs 50,000 from Property 1 and Rs 80,000 from Property 2.

    Loan Repayment or Continuing EMI: Factors to Consider
    Here are some key aspects you need to evaluate before deciding to sell or continue the loan:

    1. Interest on the Loan
    The first question is: What is the interest rate on your home loan for Property 3? If the interest rate is high, clearing the loan might make sense.
    If your loan interest rate is below 8%, the loan cost is relatively low. You could consider continuing the loan and using your surplus for better investments that generate higher returns.
    2. Rental Income Stability
    You are getting a rental income of Rs 1.3 lakh from Property 1 and 2 combined. This is a steady income stream that can support your monthly EMIs or other expenses.
    If you sell one of these properties, you will lose this stable rental income. Consider how this will affect your long-term cash flow.
    3. Opportunity Cost of Selling the Properties
    Selling Property 1 or 2 will give you liquidity to clear the loan on Property 3. However, this would result in the loss of rental income of Rs 50,000 or Rs 80,000.
    Think about the potential appreciation of these properties. If you expect significant future value increase, holding onto them may be wise.
    4. Capital Gains Tax Consideration
    If you sell either property, you will need to pay capital gains tax. The tax implications can reduce the actual amount you get from the sale.
    Before making a decision, calculate the tax you will need to pay on selling the property, especially if the property has appreciated significantly.
    5. Emotional Factor and Usage
    Consider how emotionally attached you are to these properties. Would selling a property you’ve lived in or used for a long time affect your decision?
    Also, think about how you may want to use these properties in the future. If Property 2 is an office, will it have future business use?
    Benefits of Keeping the Loan
    Keeping the loan on Property 3 can be a smart option if:

    The interest rate on the loan is low.
    You can comfortably pay the EMIs from your rental income or other sources.
    You want to hold onto your properties for long-term capital appreciation.
    Benefits of Clearing the Loan
    Clearing the loan by selling Property 1 or 2 might make sense if:

    The interest rate on the loan is high and you want to avoid paying interest over a long period.
    You prefer a debt-free lifestyle and don’t want the burden of monthly EMIs.
    You can sell the property without significant tax losses or future appreciation concerns.
    Analyzing Each Option
    Option 1: Continue the Loan on Property 3
    You keep both Property 1 and 2 and continue earning Rs 1.3 lakh in rental income.
    Use this rental income to cover a portion of the EMI on Property 3.
    Over time, property prices are likely to appreciate, giving you more equity on these assets.
    This option is ideal if you have a low-interest loan and prefer to hold onto your assets.
    Option 2: Sell Property 1 or 2 to Clear the Loan
    You become debt-free by selling either Property 1 or 2.
    However, you lose the rental income from the property you sell.
    You might face capital gains tax, which will reduce the actual liquidity you get.
    This option works if you want to eliminate your loan burden and don’t mind sacrificing rental income.
    Rental Yield vs Loan Interest
    Another point to evaluate is the rental yield.

    If the rental yield (rental income as a percentage of property value) is higher than your loan interest rate, it may be more profitable to continue with the loan. If it is lower, you may want to consider clearing the loan.

    For example, if your rental yield is 3% and your loan interest rate is 8%, the loan costs are higher. In this case, clearing the loan might be a better option.

    Tax Deduction on Loan Interest
    Don't forget that home loan interest payments qualify for tax deductions under Section 24(b) of the Income Tax Act. If you fall in a high tax bracket, you might get significant tax relief by continuing the loan. This could make the loan cheaper overall.

    Finally
    Making this decision requires balancing your long-term financial goals and current financial comfort. It’s not just about clearing the loan but about ensuring that your assets and cash flows are optimized for the future.

    If your loan interest rate is low and you can comfortably pay the EMI, consider keeping the loan. The rental income you have is steady, and property values are likely to appreciate.

    If the loan interest rate is high or the EMI feels burdensome, you might want to clear the loan by selling one of your properties. But do keep in mind the tax implications and the long-term benefits of retaining your properties.

    I recommend speaking to a Certified Financial Planner to analyze this further, as personal financial situations can vary greatly.

    Best Regards,
    K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
    Chief Financial Planner,
    www.holisticinvestment.in
    https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

    ...Read more

    Ramalingam

    Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6630 Answers  |Ask -

    Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Oct 16, 2024

    Money
    Sir, I am 44 years old. I have started investing in Mutual funds. I have invested @Rs 2000 each in 4 nos of mutual funds. SBI bluechip - SBI Small cap - Parag Parikh Flexi cap - Icici multi cap growth - How good a mix is this and how much my approximate wealth creation will be at 60. I also have an NPS of Rs 2500 p.m. NPS Vatsalya of Rs 2000 p.m. Provident fund investment of Rs 7000 p.m. Sukanya Samriddhi of Rs 1000 p.m. Other than LICs of around 15000 p.m. How is this strategy and do I need to change anything. I have a son and daughter and i am the sole earner in my family. Net salary is around Rs 94000 p.m. Kindly guide Regards G S Bhattacharya
    Ans: Mr. Bhattacharya, your current investment strategy is quite diversified, which is a great start. You're investing in mutual funds, NPS, Provident Fund, Sukanya Samriddhi, and LICs. Let’s take a detailed look at each of your investments and assess how they contribute to your long-term goals, including wealth creation and family security.

    Mutual Fund Mix Evaluation
    You have chosen a mix of large-cap, small-cap, flexi-cap, and multi-cap funds. Let’s break this down:

    SBI Bluechip (Large Cap): This fund focuses on stable, large companies. It offers consistent growth with lower risk compared to small- and mid-cap funds.

    SBI Small Cap: Small-cap funds are known for high growth potential but come with higher volatility. It's good for long-term wealth creation if you can handle the risk.

    Parag Parikh Flexi Cap: Flexi-cap funds provide a balanced approach as they invest across market caps. This fund adds diversification and flexibility to your portfolio.

    ICICI Multicap Growth: Multi-cap funds offer broad exposure across large, mid, and small-cap stocks. This adds diversity and helps balance risk and return.

    Your current mix is balanced with exposure to different market segments. However, you are investing only Rs 8,000 per month across four funds. If possible, consider increasing your SIPs over time to enhance your wealth creation.

    You may also want to review your portfolio every year with a Certified Financial Planner to ensure it's aligned with your goals and risk tolerance.

    NPS (National Pension System)
    You are contributing Rs 2,500 per month to NPS, which is a good retirement tool. NPS offers a mix of equity, corporate bonds, and government securities. It also gives you the benefit of tax savings under Section 80C and 80CCD(1B). However, at Rs 2,500 per month, your contribution is relatively low. Increasing this amount will give you a more substantial retirement corpus.

    NPS Vatsalya
    Your Rs 2,000 contribution to NPS Vatsalya adds to your retirement planning. While both NPS and NPS Vatsalya are pension schemes, you need to assess whether maintaining both is necessary. A professional planner can help you decide if consolidating these investments might be more effective.

    Provident Fund (PF)
    Contributing Rs 7,000 per month to your Provident Fund is excellent for building a retirement corpus. It offers guaranteed returns and is a safe long-term investment. The tax benefits and safety make this an essential part of your strategy. You can continue this contribution as it builds a solid foundation for your retirement.

    Sukanya Samriddhi Scheme (SSS)
    You are contributing Rs 1,000 per month towards Sukanya Samriddhi for your daughter. This is a great step towards securing her future. It offers attractive interest rates, and the maturity is tax-free. This is one of the best tools for saving for your daughter’s education and marriage.

    LIC Premiums
    You are paying Rs 15,000 per month towards LIC policies. LIC offers security, but it’s crucial to assess whether these policies are insurance-cum-investment products. These policies often provide lower returns than mutual funds. It might be worth reconsidering your allocation to LIC, focusing on term insurance for protection and mutual funds for growth. If you find that these are traditional or ULIP policies, consider surrendering them and reinvesting in high-return mutual funds.

    Wealth Creation by Age 60: Approximate Insights
    Given your current investment pattern, let's look at potential wealth creation:

    Mutual Funds: With a SIP of Rs 8,000 per month, assuming an average annual return of 12% over the next 16 years, your mutual funds can grow significantly. You could expect a corpus upwards of Rs 50-60 lakh, depending on market performance and how regularly you increase your SIP amounts.

    NPS: Your Rs 2,500 contribution per month might result in a decent retirement corpus, depending on how long you continue investing and the equity-debt ratio of your NPS portfolio. Over time, you can expect this corpus to grow steadily.

    Provident Fund: Your Rs 7,000 per month in PF contributions will continue building a safe and stable retirement corpus.

    Sukanya Samriddhi: Your contributions towards Sukanya Samriddhi will grow until your daughter turns 21, and the tax-free maturity amount will help with her education or marriage.

    However, exact wealth creation depends on how consistently you invest and whether you increase contributions over time. Periodic reviews with a Certified Financial Planner can give you better insights.

    Family Protection and Financial Security
    You mentioned that you are the sole earner in your family. It's crucial to protect your family with a pure term insurance plan rather than relying on LIC's traditional policies for both insurance and investment. Pure term insurance offers higher coverage at a lower cost.

    Since you have a son and a daughter, ensuring they are financially secure is essential. You may need to assess your insurance coverage to ensure it meets your family's needs in case of unforeseen circumstances.

    Suggestions for Improvement
    While your strategy is solid, here are a few improvements to consider:

    Increase SIPs Gradually: If your budget allows, gradually increase your SIPs. Even small increases can have a significant impact on your long-term wealth.

    Focus on Term Insurance: If your LIC policies are investment-cum-insurance plans, consider switching to term insurance for higher life coverage at a lower cost. Reinvest the difference in mutual funds for better returns.

    Review NPS Contributions: Consider increasing your NPS contributions if retirement security is a primary goal. The NPS can be a powerful tool for building a retirement corpus, but your current contributions may be on the lower side.

    Keep an Emergency Fund: Ensure you have a sufficient emergency fund. Ideally, you should aim for 6-12 months of expenses saved in a liquid, safe investment like a savings account or liquid mutual fund.

    Child’s Education Planning: Sukanya Samriddhi is excellent for your daughter. For your son, you may want to allocate additional savings towards his higher education through a dedicated investment plan.

    Final Insights
    Your current investment approach is diversified and provides a good balance between growth and safety. You have laid a strong foundation for retirement, children’s education, and insurance.

    To further enhance your financial security:

    Gradually increase your SIPs and NPS contributions.
    Shift to term insurance for higher life cover.
    Periodically review your portfolio to ensure it aligns with your long-term goals.
    Lastly, don't hesitate to seek advice from a Certified Financial Planner for personalized guidance on growing and protecting your wealth.

    Best Regards,

    K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

    Chief Financial Planner,

    www.holisticinvestment.in
    https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

    ...Read more

    DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

    Close  

    You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
    Login

    A verification OTP will be sent to this
    Mobile Number / Email

    Enter OTP
    A 6 digit code has been sent to

    Resend OTP in120seconds

    Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
    Sign up

    By signing up, you agree to our
    Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

    Already have an account?

    Enter OTP
    A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

    Resend OTP in120seconds

    x