I am a 26 years old girl completed my studies, trying to get a job, 2 years back I fell in love online with a man of 32 years old, we have not met yet physically. He is working on a very small salary in a village i.e. his hometown. He can't get a good government job or private job now due to lack of experience and age. We love each other a lot with all our flaws. My family is strictly against it due to caste difference, low salary, he lives 1600 km away, background differences. Overall they don't trust him and our love and are emotionally blackmailing me to get married with someone they choose. And the thought alone of leaving him makes me sad

Ans: Dear Anamika,
By running away, you are only making things more complicated for yourself.
You said: That you family WILL NOT accept this...how do you know if you still haven't asked them?
Also, let's say that they say NO...Find out what their concern is...being from the previous generation, they most likely might have an issue with him being divorced; which means you need to make an effort to make the boy and your parents meet. Let them also see what you see in him.
How easy it is to run away rather than actually facing things head on, right? Face the, fix them, work on them...then you will have a chance at more blossoming relationships. No where in your letter, I could read what the boy's opinion or reaction to the matter is. What does he feel about all this? How committed is he as you are the one planning to leave everything behind? How is his family background? These are missing gaps in your story and I urge you to look into this before taking any step. Marriage is not a movie type fairy tale; it is literally breaking into a new life and making something together as a couple. Do you two have that in you? Think...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I am sorry to hear that standing in this day and age, you are facing a problem rooted in caste-related discrimination. I can only suggest you to sit with your parents and make them understand that someone's caste is not their identity. I understand that it will be very hard, especially when it's your parents, but parents can be wrong too. Try highlighting the positives and the achievements of your partner whenever you are discussing the matter with them.


Also have an open discussion about the entire ordeal with your partner. If he too feels that he is suffering because of this relationship, you might want to reassure him that things will be better soon.


Best Wishes.

Ans: I understand that you are in a difficult position. You are in love with a man who does not seem to be emotionally available or ready for marriage. You have also met another man who seems to be a better match for you, but you are not sure if you should pursue a relationship with him.

It is important to remember that you are not alone. Many people find themselves in similar situations. It is also important to remember that you have the power to make the best decision for yourself.

I am against marriage in the first place. I believe that relationships are not meant to be permanent. However, I understand that many people feel differently. If you do decide to get married, it is important to do so for the right reasons. You should not marry someone just because you feel pressured to do so by society or your parents.

The first guy does not seem like he wants to marry you. He has brushed off your attempts to talk about marriage and has even diverted the topic. This is a clear sign that he is not ready for a serious relationship.

The second guy seems like he may be a better match for you. He is emotionally available and seems to be interested in getting married. However, it is important to remember that you do not know him very well. You have only spoken to him for a few hours.

Ultimately, the decision of whether or not to pursue a relationship with either of these men is up to you. I would encourage you to take some time to think about what you want out of a relationship. What are your goals? What are your values? Once you have a clear understanding of what you want, you can start to make decisions that are in your best interests.

If you do decide to pursue a relationship with the second guy, I would recommend that you spend at least two years getting to know him before you get married. This will give you enough time to learn about his true character and to see if he is really the right person for you.

Mohit Arora S
Founder - Real Dating School

www.realdatingschool.com/1-1_call

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Then wait for a few years...things may just get better in those few years and your parents may start to accept the guy. It's not like you need them give you a nod right away for marriage, right? So, wait up...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/