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Should I marry my friend who is not working, knowing the value of companionship?

Ravi Mittal |536 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 21, 2025

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 21, 2025Hindi

Relationship

Hi Sir...I am (29M)in dilemma whether to get married or not...also I know the value of companionship in life...and I like a girl who's old friend so I asked her about dating...but we are not ure about marriage also she's not working which adds to financial aspect...as we both are from middle class background... please suggest on this chaos...how to take such a big call...I think she's loyal which is rare nowadays but also financial hurdles as i wish not to continue my job in future

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Loyalty is not rare in today’s day and age. I am sorry that you didn’t find someone who was to you, but it would be unfair to generalize. Now, coming to the more important point, financial stability is extremely important to maintain a happy marriage or even to have a happy life. Monetary troubles can add unnecessary burdens in life.

If you are unsure about getting married, it's best to wait a little and go forward with it only when you feel ready for such a commitment.

You mentioned you do not want to continue your job- do you plan on starting some other venture? I am a little unclear on this. Moreover, in today's day and age, it is almost essential for both partners to earn to live a decent life.
I hope these will help you.

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Hi sir, i am 42 divorced male with no child from previous marriage. Now i m getting a girl with three types 1) divorced girl which my parents dont wants (as thy want unmarried girl) 2) unmarried girl but quite aged 3) unmarried girl with decent age but poor family background n very less educated. I m quite confused with whom i should marry as i m quite scare after my breakoff from 1st marriage which was love marriage and not able to take decision on this. I m well educated smart and earning quite decent. My parents wants girl should be unmarried n can manage house n also take care of them n they dont want working girl too but she should be beautiful educated n good family background. Because of this my marriage is getting delayed n also not getting any match. Kindly suggest what should i do how much which type of girl i should i prefer..i m clueless in this n not able to take decision.

Ans: Tell me something, do you want a wife or a glorified live-in maid for your parents? I cannot believe that in this day and age so-called educated men like you are asking questions like this! “My parents want this, my parents want that”… who the hell is getting married, you or them? You’re a divorcee yourself, but a divorced woman is not good enough for you? A working girl will be frowned upon because THEY want a housewife? If this is the kind of backward-thinking family you come from, it’s hardly surprising your first marriage failed! Man up, go for someone who YOU are interested in, and if you have any common sense, stay separately from your parents after marriage!

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Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 19, 2023

Question by SHASHANK - May 12, 2023Hindi

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I'm 48 years old never married guy. I once suffered from rare cancer which is cured now. Also hv epilepsy whose treatment will go life long. Doctor says that i should disclose my health issue with whom I'm thinking of getting married but no one takes talks further. I'm infact ready for divorcee or widow too but failed. Some ppl reject me as my salary is mot much, some says that i dont hv my own hm etc but i hv many friens who are getting less salary but are happily married. My whole family if highly educated although I'm also pg but still get rejected. My dad expired n was too worried for my marriage. Now my mother is with me n i dont know what to do. I hv spend approx 35k on matrimonial advertisements but got no success. Im currently in touch with girl for last 1+ year but dont know whether she likes me or not although i hd expressed my feelings to her many times but she never respond n get silent on that. Kindly help whether i should approach this girl or leave her. I like this girl very much. Should i still search for a bride or leave this issue. Kindly help.

Ans: Dear Shashank,

If you have been straightforward about your feelings for this woman and expressed the same and yet she has never reciprocated it even once so far, it might be because she does not feel the same about it. I'd suggest you talk to her about this. Instead of leaving it open-ended, like "I like you," and letting her react to it, be direct. For instance, "I like you. What about you? Do you like me?" Being direct would definitively fetch you some real answers. If she replies to your question, there you go; you have your answer. If she ignores it still, you can safely assume that she doesn't feel the same way as you do. Don't delay this; ask her as soon as possible. Stretching a relationship that ultimately leads to a dead-end will harm your peace and happiness in the longer run.

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Question by girish - Sep 06, 2024Hindi

Relationship

Hello, I m 45 years old (Man) divorce and a collegue of mine who is 29 year old (Female) we get along nicely but since last few day i thing she is interested in me and now even i have develop feeling for her but i want to be in healthy relationship her but dont wannt to get married due my failed and bad experiece of my previous marriage. Pls suggest what should i do and dont want to loose her. Pls reply at the earliest

Ans: Dear Girish,
First of all, don't assume that she has feelings for you. Please confirm and then think of pursuing a relationship. Let's say she shares your feelings, it is important to let her know that you do not intend to get married; she might have other plans and it would be unfair for you to take them away from her. If both of your plans align, then very well. If not, I would suggest you find someone who is on the same page as you.
Please speak to her first.

Best Wishes.

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