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How can a 25-year-old with a stable income invest to reach a 1 crore goal in 10 years?

Milind

Milind Vadjikar  |797 Answers  |Ask -

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Sep 04, 2024

Milind Vadjikar is an independent MF distributor registered with Association of Mutual Funds in India (AMFI) and a retirement financial planning advisor registered with Pension Fund Regulatory and Development Authority (PFRDA).
He has a mechanical engineering degree from Government Engineering College, Sambhajinagar, and an MBA in international business from the Symbiosis Institute of Business Management, Pune.
With over 16 years of experience in stock investments, and over six year experience in investment guidance and support, he believes that balanced asset allocation and goal-focused disciplined investing is the key to achieving investor goals.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Aug 29, 2024Hindi
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How I can invest to get one crore in 10 years

Ans: Do a SIP of 45K per month in a flexi cap mutual fund for 10 years so as to achieve your target. (Assuming conservative return of 12%)

*Investments in mutual funds are subjected to market risks. Read all scheme related documents carefully before investing

You may follow us on X at @mars_invest for further updates

Happy Investing!
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 29, 2024

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I am 36 year old, I earn 80000/ month , I am investing 10000 sip in mutual fund from last1.5 year. Want to make 1 crore in 10 year. Please suggest me how to invest in proper way.
Ans: You are 36 years old and earn Rs 80,000 per month. You have been investing Rs 10,000 monthly in mutual funds for the past 1.5 years. Your goal is to accumulate Rs 1 crore in 10 years. Let’s explore how to achieve this goal with a structured investment plan.

Understanding Your Goal
Achieving Rs 1 crore in 10 years requires a strategic approach. Your current SIP of Rs 10,000 per month is a great start. However, reaching Rs 1 crore will require adjusting your investments and possibly increasing your monthly contribution over time.

Assessing Your Current Investment
Your Rs 10,000 SIP in mutual funds is a wise choice. Mutual funds offer growth potential through diversified equity investments. They are suitable for long-term goals due to their potential for high returns.

Projecting Future Growth
To reach Rs 1 crore in 10 years, your investments need to grow at a certain rate. Here’s a plan to optimize your investments:

Increase SIP Amount
Consider increasing your SIP amount gradually. Start by increasing it by a manageable amount, say Rs 2,000 every year. This approach leverages the power of compounding and helps in achieving your target faster.

Diversify Mutual Fund Portfolio
Diversify your investments across different mutual fund categories:

Large-Cap Funds: These funds invest in established companies with stable growth.

Mid-Cap Funds: These funds invest in mid-sized companies with higher growth potential.

Small-Cap Funds: These funds invest in smaller companies with higher risk but potential for high returns.

Multi-Cap Funds: These funds invest across various market capitalizations, providing balanced growth.

Opt for Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds can outperform index funds due to professional management. A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can help select the best funds tailored to your risk profile and goals.

Regularly Monitor and Review Investments
Regularly reviewing your investments ensures they are on track to meet your goals. Here’s how to do it:

Quarterly Review
Review your portfolio every quarter. Check the performance of your mutual funds and make adjustments if needed.

Annual Rebalancing
Rebalance your portfolio annually. Ensure it aligns with your financial goals and risk tolerance. A CFP can assist in this process.

Tax Planning and Efficiency
Efficient tax planning can enhance your returns. Here are some strategies:

Use Tax-Saving Mutual Funds
Invest in Equity Linked Savings Schemes (ELSS). They offer tax benefits under Section 80C and have the potential for high returns.

Long-Term Capital Gains
Long-term investments in mutual funds enjoy favorable tax treatment. Hold your investments for the long term to benefit from lower capital gains tax.

Managing Risk
Balancing risk and return is crucial. Here’s how to manage risk effectively:

Diversification
Diversify across various asset classes and mutual fund categories. This spreads risk and enhances potential returns.

Emergency Fund
Maintain an emergency fund equivalent to 6-12 months of living expenses. This ensures financial stability during unforeseen circumstances.

Leveraging Incremental Increases
As your income grows, increase your SIP contributions. Incremental increases can significantly impact your investment corpus over time.

Seeking Professional Guidance
A Certified Financial Planner (CFP) can provide personalized advice. They can help in selecting the right funds, monitoring performance, and making necessary adjustments.

Conclusion
Reaching Rs 1 crore in 10 years is achievable with disciplined investing. Increase your SIP contributions, diversify your portfolio, and regularly review your investments. Efficient tax planning and risk management will further enhance your returns. Professional guidance from a CFP can ensure your investment strategy aligns with your financial goals.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 23, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 10, 2024Hindi
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I have 1 crore cash .... How can I make 5 crore in next 10 years
Ans: You want to grow Rs. 1 crore into Rs. 5 crores in 10 years. This is a very ambitious goal and requires a strategic approach. Achieving this will require disciplined investments and careful planning.

Power of Compounding
Compounding is your strongest ally in achieving such growth. The longer your money stays invested, the more it can grow. The key is to choose investment avenues that offer both growth potential and compounding benefits.

Choosing the Right Investment Mix
To achieve your goal, you need a balanced investment portfolio. This means spreading your investments across various types of mutual funds. Consider a mix of equity funds, which offer high growth potential, and balanced funds, which offer stability.

Equity Mutual Funds: Equity funds should form the core of your investment. They have the potential to generate higher returns over the long term. Choose funds managed by experienced fund managers.

Balanced or Hybrid Funds: These funds invest in both equity and debt instruments. They offer moderate growth with lower risk. This helps in cushioning your portfolio against market volatility.

Avoid Index Funds: Index funds only track the market. They don't try to outperform it. Actively managed funds aim to deliver better returns than the index. With an ambitious target, actively managed funds could serve you better.

Importance of Regular Investment
Investing your Rs. 1 crore in one go can be risky. Instead, consider a Systematic Investment Plan (SIP). This spreads your investment over time and reduces the impact of market volatility.

Systematic Investment Plan (SIP): Start a SIP in your chosen mutual funds. This approach will help you average out the purchase cost and manage risks better.

Top-Up Your SIP: Consider increasing your SIP amount every year by 10-20%. This strategy will accelerate your corpus growth.

Role of Diversification
Don’t put all your money in one type of investment. Diversifying your portfolio will spread the risk and increase the chances of achieving your goal.

Diversify Across Sectors: Invest in mutual funds that focus on different sectors. This way, if one sector underperforms, others can balance it out.

Diversify Across Market Capitalisation: Include funds that invest in large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap stocks. Large-caps offer stability, while mid and small-caps offer higher growth potential.

Avoiding High-Risk Investments
While it may be tempting to go for high-risk investments like direct stocks or sector-specific funds, they can be volatile. Your focus should be on consistent growth rather than chasing quick returns.

Avoid Direct Stock Investments: Stocks can be unpredictable. For your goal, mutual funds are a safer and more reliable option.

Avoid Real Estate and Annuities: Real estate is not liquid, and annuities offer lower returns. Stick to mutual funds for better growth potential.

Regular Review and Rebalancing
Your investment strategy needs regular monitoring. As market conditions change, your portfolio may need adjustments.

Review Quarterly: Check your portfolio’s performance every quarter. This will help you stay on track to meet your financial goals.

Rebalance Annually: Rebalancing ensures your portfolio stays aligned with your risk tolerance and goals. Shift funds from one category to another based on performance and future outlook.

The Role of a Certified Financial Planner
Having a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) by your side can be beneficial. They can guide you in selecting the right mutual funds, adjusting your strategy, and keeping you focused on your goals.

Expert Guidance: A CFP will help you navigate market uncertainties and keep your investments aligned with your financial plan.

Tax Efficiency: A CFP can also help you plan tax-efficient withdrawals and investments, ensuring you keep more of your returns.

Final Insights
Your goal of turning Rs. 1 crore into Rs. 5 crores in 10 years is achievable with the right strategy. Focus on a diversified mutual fund portfolio, regular SIPs, and annual reviews to keep your investments on track.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 22, 2024Hindi
Money
I have a corpus of 1 crore in liquid cash. How to make investment that will yield me 5 crore in 10 years time.
Ans: You have a corpus of Rs. 1 crore. Your goal is to grow this to Rs. 5 crore in 10 years. This is an ambitious target, but achievable with the right strategy.

Achieving a five-fold increase over ten years requires an annual return of about 17.5%. Let’s explore how you can structure your investments to meet this goal.

Assessing Your Risk Profile
Your target return indicates a need for higher-risk investments.
Assess your risk tolerance. Higher returns often come with higher volatility.
If you are comfortable with market fluctuations, a significant portion of your portfolio can be allocated to equity.
Diversified Equity Investments
Equity Mutual Funds
Equity mutual funds should form the core of your portfolio. They can provide the growth needed to reach your target.
Diversify across large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds. This will help balance risk and reward.
Large-cap funds offer stability, while mid-cap and small-cap funds provide higher growth potential.
Actively Managed Funds
Avoid index funds. They track the market and may not achieve your target.
Actively managed funds, led by experienced fund managers, aim to outperform the market.
A Certified Financial Planner can help you select the best-performing funds.
Sector and Thematic Funds
Consider sector-specific funds in high-growth industries like technology or healthcare.
Thematic funds focusing on emerging trends can also be lucrative.
These funds carry higher risk but can significantly boost returns if chosen wisely.
Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs)
While you already have Rs. 1 crore, regular investments through SIPs can enhance returns.
SIPs help in rupee-cost averaging, reducing the impact of market volatility.
Start SIPs in a mix of the funds mentioned above. This will ensure disciplined investing.
Direct vs. Regular Funds
Direct funds may have lower expenses, but they require active management.
Investing through a regular plan with a Certified Financial Planner ensures expert advice.
The planner can help adjust your portfolio as market conditions change, optimizing returns.
Portfolio Rebalancing
Regular Monitoring
Regular monitoring of your portfolio is crucial. Market conditions can change, affecting fund performance.
A Certified Financial Planner will review your investments periodically, making necessary adjustments.
Rebalancing
Rebalancing ensures your portfolio stays aligned with your goals.
For example, if small-cap funds outperform and their weight in your portfolio increases, rebalancing will bring your portfolio back to the desired risk level.
This strategy helps in locking in profits from high-performing assets.
Adding Debt Instruments for Stability
Balanced Allocation
While equity should dominate, a portion of your portfolio in debt instruments can add stability.
Debt funds or fixed-income securities provide regular income and reduce overall risk.
A small allocation to these instruments ensures that your portfolio remains resilient during market downturns.
Hybrid Funds
Hybrid funds, which invest in both equity and debt, can offer a balanced approach.
They provide the growth potential of equity while cushioning against volatility through debt investments.
These funds are suitable if you prefer a more conservative approach.
Tax Considerations
Long-Term Capital Gains (LTCG)
Equity investments held for more than one year are subject to LTCG tax at 10% on gains above Rs. 1 lakh.
Plan your withdrawals to minimize tax liability. Consider spreading withdrawals over multiple financial years if needed.
Tax-Efficient Funds
Choose tax-efficient funds to enhance your post-tax returns.
Equity Linked Saving Schemes (ELSS) offer tax benefits under Section 80C but may not be necessary if tax-saving is not a priority.
Focus on funds that provide better returns after taxes, considering your tax bracket.
Emergency Fund and Liquidity
Maintaining Liquidity
Ensure that you keep an emergency fund aside from the Rs. 1 crore corpus.
This fund should cover at least 6-12 months of your living expenses.
Liquid funds or short-term debt funds can be ideal for this purpose.
Liquidity in Portfolio
While aiming for growth, ensure a portion of your portfolio remains liquid.
This will allow you to make adjustments if financial needs arise or market conditions change.
Final Insights
Your goal to grow Rs. 1 crore to Rs. 5 crore in 10 years is challenging but achievable. A diversified investment strategy, focused primarily on equity, is essential. Actively managed funds, sector funds, and thematic investments can drive the growth you need. Regular monitoring and rebalancing are crucial to ensure your portfolio stays on track. Additionally, maintaining a balance between growth and stability with some debt instruments can protect your investments during volatile periods. Tax efficiency and liquidity should not be overlooked, as they play a significant role in maximizing your returns and meeting any unforeseen financial needs.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 25, 2024

Money
Sir Namaste, I have been investing 20000 in almost Funds approx 18 funds, and in some funds 1 Lakhs total investments value is 25 Lakhs, few are performing well and few are under performing, I'm 44 years old,,, Large, Mid And Small Funds with ratio of 40% - 50%- 10%..
Ans: At age 44, having Rs. 25 lakhs invested in mutual funds is commendable. However, managing 18 funds may create unnecessary complexity. Below is a detailed evaluation of your portfolio and suggestions to optimise it for better performance and alignment with your goals.

Strengths of Your Portfolio
Significant Investment Corpus
You have built a sizeable corpus, which is a strong financial base.

Diversification Across Market Caps
Allocating 40% to large-cap, 50% to mid-cap, and 10% to small-cap is balanced.

Focus on Long-Term Investing
Staying invested for the long term helps in compounding wealth.

Areas for Improvement
1. Over-diversification

Holding 18 funds may result in overlapping stocks and reduced diversification benefits.
Tracking and managing so many funds can be challenging.
Recommendation

Consolidate your portfolio to 5-7 funds across large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap categories.
2. Underperforming Funds

Some funds in your portfolio are not performing well.
Continuing with such funds may drag down overall returns.
Recommendation

Review the 3-year and 5-year performance of each fund against its benchmark.
Replace consistently underperforming funds with better-performing ones.
3. Small-Cap Allocation

Small-cap funds have higher growth potential but also higher volatility.
A 10% allocation may not significantly impact overall returns.
Recommendation

Increase small-cap exposure to 15%-20% if you can handle moderate risk.
4. Fund Overlap

Multiple funds in similar categories (e.g., large-cap or mid-cap) may hold the same stocks.
This limits the benefits of diversification.
Recommendation

Use fund analysis tools to identify overlapping holdings.
Retain funds with distinct investment strategies.
Optimised Portfolio Allocation
Here is a suggested allocation for better management:

Large-Cap Funds (40%-50%): Stable returns with low volatility.
Mid-Cap Funds (30%-40%): High growth potential with moderate risk.
Small-Cap Funds (15%-20%): Higher returns for long-term goals.
Steps to Optimise Your Portfolio
1. Consolidate Funds

Retain 2 large-cap, 2 mid-cap, and 1 small-cap fund.
Add a flexi-cap fund for dynamic allocation across market caps.
2. Increase SIP Contributions

If feasible, increase monthly SIP amounts to enhance long-term corpus.
Prioritise funds with consistent performance and low expense ratios.
3. Rebalance Annually

Review your portfolio once a year to align with market conditions.
Rebalance to maintain your desired asset allocation.
4. Focus on Actively Managed Funds

Actively managed funds can outperform the market in India.
Avoid index funds or ETFs as they limit flexibility and adaptability.
5. Monitor Performance Regularly

Track fund performance against benchmarks and peers.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner for detailed insights.
Tax Considerations
Equity mutual funds attract LTCG tax of 12.5% for gains above Rs. 1.25 lakh.
Short-term gains are taxed at 20%.
Recommendation

Avoid frequent redemptions to minimise tax liabilities.
Redeem funds strategically to maximise tax efficiency.
Final Insights
Your portfolio shows strong financial discipline and focus on long-term goals.

Consolidating your funds will simplify management and improve returns.

Focus on high-performing funds while maintaining diversification across market caps.

Rebalancing annually will help in staying aligned with your financial objectives.

Stay invested with discipline to achieve your financial milestones.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 25, 2024Hindi
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Namaste ???? ji Mere pass 2 lac rupees saving hai mujhe bataye mein kis sector me invest karu ya fir koi achhe stock jo king term k liye best ho apni ray de?
Ans: It’s great that you are considering investing for the long term. Here is a detailed plan for you:

Start with a Diversified Mutual Fund
Direct investment in stocks requires time, research, and expertise.

A diversified mutual fund is better for beginners and long-term growth.

Choose actively managed flexi-cap or large-cap equity funds.

These funds balance risk and reward effectively.

Avoid Sector-Specific Investments Initially
Sectoral funds or stocks (like technology, pharma) are volatile.
Invest in these only after building basic financial knowledge.
Build a Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
Instead of investing Rs. 2 lakh at once, use SIPs.
Invest Rs. 10,000–20,000 monthly in equity mutual funds.
This spreads risk and captures market fluctuations effectively.
Emergency Fund First
Keep at least Rs. 50,000 in a savings account or liquid fund.
This acts as a safety net for emergencies.
For Direct Stock Investment
If you want to invest in stocks:

Focus on companies with strong fundamentals and consistent growth.
Avoid high-risk penny stocks or speculative trades.
Look into large-cap companies with leadership in their industries.
Examples of industries to consider:

Banking and Financials: Well-established players for consistent returns.
Consumer Goods: Reliable performance even in volatile markets.
IT Sector: Long-term growth prospects with global exposure.
Key Points to Remember
Invest with a horizon of at least 5-10 years for meaningful growth.
Diversify your investments to reduce risk.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner for detailed guidance.
Stay disciplined and avoid emotional decisions during market fluctuations.
Final Insights
Starting with mutual funds is the safest and most efficient way.

Direct stocks require significant time and understanding.

Ensure your investments align with your goals and risk tolerance.

With the right approach, Rs. 2 lakh can grow into significant wealth over time.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7335 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 25, 2024Hindi
Money
Hi Nikunjji, i am 45 years old & taken the following Mutual fund SIP for long term (approx 15-20 yrs) 1) Aditya birla sunlife india Gen next fund growth @ Rs. 3000/- per month 2) HDFC retirement saving fund equity plan growth plan growth option - Rs.10000/- per month 3) Aditya birla sunlife digital india fund- growth plan - Rs. 5000/- per month 4) Nippon india large cap fund - growth plan - Rs100000 lumsum 5) Parag parikh flexi cap fund-growth - Rs. 100000 lumsum 6) HDFC flexi cap fund growth option - Rs. 50000 lumsum 7) Aditya birla sunlife equity hybrid 95 fund growth - Rs. 50000 lumsum Request you to please review my above plan & advise taking into consideration the long term planning
Ans: Your portfolio reflects a disciplined approach to long-term wealth creation. Investing with a horizon of 15-20 years is an excellent strategy. Below is a detailed assessment and suggestions for optimisation.

Strengths of Your Portfolio
Diversification Across Asset Classes
Your portfolio includes equity-focused funds and hybrid funds. This diversification reduces risks.

Allocation to Flexi-Cap Funds
Including flexi-cap funds provides balanced exposure to large, mid, and small-cap companies.

Focus on Growth
Growth options in your funds allow compounding over the long term.

Systematic Investments
SIPs ensure disciplined investing and rupee-cost averaging.

Lump Sum Investments
Lump sum investments supplement SIPs by capturing market opportunities.

Areas for Improvement
1. Portfolio Overlap

Multiple funds in your portfolio might overlap in underlying investments.
For instance, flexi-cap and large-cap funds may invest in similar stocks.
Overlap reduces diversification benefits.
Recommendation

Evaluate fund portfolios with a Certified Financial Planner to identify overlap.
Retain funds with distinct investment strategies.
2. Sectoral Funds Risk

Sectoral funds focus on specific industries like technology or consumption.
These funds are highly volatile and carry higher risk.
Recommendation

Limit sectoral fund exposure to 10% of your portfolio.
Instead, focus on diversified funds for consistent growth.
3. Hybrid Fund Allocation

Hybrid funds mix equity and debt, offering balanced risk and returns.
However, they might underperform pure equity funds in long bull markets.
Recommendation

Reassess hybrid fund allocation based on your risk tolerance.
Consider increasing equity fund allocation for long-term goals.
4. Tax Efficiency

Equity mutual funds have specific tax implications under new rules:
LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh is taxed at 12.5%.
STCG is taxed at 20%.
Recommendation

Plan withdrawals to optimise tax liabilities.
Avoid frequent withdrawals to maximise compounding.
Suggestions for Portfolio Optimisation
1. Consolidate Mutual Funds

Retain 4-5 funds across different categories: large-cap, mid-cap, and flexi-cap.
This reduces complexity and improves portfolio tracking.
2. Increase SIP Contributions

SIPs offer the advantage of disciplined investing and rupee-cost averaging.
Increase your SIPs gradually to enhance long-term corpus.
3. Focus on Actively Managed Funds

Actively managed funds outperform index funds in emerging markets like India.
They adapt to market conditions and deliver superior returns.
4. Review Fund Performance Annually

Monitor fund performance against benchmarks and peers.
Replace consistently underperforming funds after consulting a Certified Financial Planner.
5. Maintain an Emergency Fund

Keep 6-12 months’ expenses in a liquid fund or FD.
This ensures liquidity for unforeseen needs.
Retirement Planning Considerations
1. Corpus Target of Rs. 8 Crores

Achieving Rs. 8 crore requires consistent investments and strategic planning.
SIPs and lump sums in equity mutual funds are ideal for wealth creation.
2. Inflation Adjustment

Plan your retirement corpus keeping inflation at 6-7% annually in mind.
Ensure your investment strategy beats inflation over the long term.
3. Health Coverage

Health costs rise significantly in retirement.
Review your health insurance coverage to ensure sufficient protection.
4. Withdrawal Strategy

Adopt a systematic withdrawal plan (SWP) in retirement.
This ensures steady income while preserving your corpus.
Additional Considerations
1. Avoid Emotional Decisions

Market volatility is normal in long-term investments.
Stick to your plan and avoid reacting to short-term fluctuations.
2. Revisit Goals Periodically

Review your financial goals every 2-3 years.
Adjust your portfolio if your financial situation or goals change.
3. Stay Informed

Understand the funds you invest in.
Consult a Certified Financial Planner for insights and guidance.
4. Avoid Direct Funds

Direct funds may seem cost-effective but lack expert advice.
Investing through a Certified Financial Planner ensures informed decisions.
Final Insights
Your portfolio is well-structured for long-term wealth creation.

Consolidate funds to reduce overlap and complexity.

Focus on actively managed funds for superior returns.

Limit sectoral exposure to balance risk and reward.

Maintain discipline in SIPs and stay invested for the long term.

With these strategies, you can achieve your financial goals effectively.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1410 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 19, 2024
Relationship
I have a question that I’ve been too embarrassed to ask anyone, but I feel like it’s time to get some clarity. I’m a woman in my early 30s, in a stable relationship, but recently, I’ve been noticing something that’s throwing me off track. I’ve been having a lot of intense sexual thoughts that I can’t seem to shake off. It's not just about attraction to my partner; these thoughts are more spontaneous and often come at the most random moments. They feel almost uncontrollable, and it’s starting to affect how I see myself. I feel like I’m living in two worlds – one where I’m a responsible adult, and the other where these lustful feelings seem to take over, and it’s hard to focus on anything else. I’ve tried suppressing them, distracting myself, but it feels like they come back stronger, almost like my mind has a mind of its own! It’s frustrating, and honestly, I’m not sure if I should feel guilty or empowered by these urges. How do I handle this without feeling like I’m losing control? Any tips on how to balance my desires with my everyday life?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Lust and behaviors that arise from it are just one aspect of your life not the only thing. When you get consumed with it in a way that it starts to impact your daily living, then hey, you have to do something really heavy to make a change.
Now, what can that be? A new skill, a hobby...these kind of challenges keep the mind in a learning mode and channelizes your energies into another thing as well.
But of course, do make sure that you and your partner are also having your share of intimacy. This along with learning something new can ideally do the magic. Also, put on those gym shoes, running shoes or anything that gets you enough physical activity. See where all this goes...
On, and guilt, is quite a wasteful job in your case...so drop it and focus on newer things that keep you on your toes.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1410 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 25, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 17, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hi Anu, I need some advice that’s a bit out of the ordinary. I’ve been married for 8 years, and my wife and I have recently been discussing investing in property together. The twist is, we have very different ideas on what to do with it. I’ve always been more of a numbers person—thinking about it as a solid financial investment. I want to buy something that will increase in value over time and add to our financial security. On the other hand, my wife sees it more as a home. She’s emotionally attached to the idea of a cozy, dream house, somewhere we can raise our family and enjoy life together. So, we’ve been butting heads a bit, as I’m leaning more towards an investment property in a growing area, while she’s looking for something more in line with what we want to live in now. It’s getting a little tense between us because I feel like she’s not seeing the financial side of things, and she thinks I’m too focused on money and not on our happiness. Is there a middle ground where we can both be happy?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Well, it's dream v/s practicality, yeah?
When you get to a stalemate situation like the one you and your wife are in, the best way is to go back to the Square A.
Start where you began when you married...list down what's important to each of you and somewhere in your case, it will lead not just to her wants and yours, but it will go back to money and financial prudence. When you hit this, come to an understanding as to how you will overcome this; it has to be mutually agreed upon. Then bring your current home buying issue and solve it just like the way you sorted your differences over finances. Try it...it will work...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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