Hi Ma'm I have a son studying in Class 9th except school he was not interest in books he alway want to play that too max time on Mobiles. We are trying to avoid him with mobile. if mobile is not available he is busy with TV, if any scold on him he will leave home and go for play with his friends at ground but he is not showing any interest on studying. can you suggest how to handle this situation Hari Krishna Visakhapatnam (AP)

Ans: Put him on self awareness and control using some token strategy.
Every right behaviour get him a token and negative behaviour token can be kept back.
When using this strategy, you need to be mindful by giving token only for right behaviour. He can collect it and exchange the same to get a reward from you.

Ans: Most of the time when they have screen addiction,it's difficult for them to develop intrest in the alternative skills or studies. This can be due to less attention skills due to screen time. See what is he interested in apart from the screen addiction, help him develop hobbies which are of his interest and it can be sports too. This will help him to focus better on his studies too.

Ans: It's important to understand that how is he faring in his studies.All of a sudden if you reduce he might not be able to adhere to it. But a gradual decrease in any behaviour is recommended. This way you will also not feel disheartened and even he will be able to do with out it for short intervals. He can be praised for the amount of efforts he takes to be without the mobile and doing his studies. Regular praises can act as a reinforcement to increase the probability of right behaviours.

Ans: Pravin Sir,

Addition to electronic gadgets is one of the problems, some parents face nowadays.

First of all, approach a good Professional / Qualified Student Counsellor along with your son in your locality. Make sure, the Counsellor has Psychology Background also. There might be some changes. If needed, you can approach a Psychologist, having specialised knowledge in Counselling the children of your son's age.

Follow-up counselling sessions with the counsellors are also important until he changes his attitude.

If possible, visit his college and request for couselling your son. Almost all colleges have counsellors who can help.

Some other tips:

1) Tell him, he also can become YouTuber. But ask him what plans he has to become a YouTuber?
2) Switching off WiFi & being authoritarian will not work.
3) Communicate or interact with him politely whenever possible.
4) Tell him he can use his mobile but, at the same time should focus on his studies as well.
5) Make sure, atmosophere at home is good. Such as, parents also should avoid spending too much time on Electronic Gadgets. Most of the children imitate only their parents.
6) If possible, tell him to participate in physical activities as well.

All the BEST for Your Bright Future.

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Ans: Hello Sunil!!

I am doing great, thank you for asking, God bless you!

I can totally understand when you say you are worried.

Your son is 12.5, he will soon be a teenager. There will be different challenges, I want you to read up on parenting a teenager and be ready to handle him well.

The problem as I see it is that everyone of you, his teachers included have made studies like a burden for him.... and subjected the young child to a lot of anxiety, he just wants to run away form it....
"Every teacher from his kindergarten days upto now has the same complaint that he is doesn't pay attention in class".... this statement of yours... it is the teacher's duty to ensure the child listens to him/her, how can she start labeling a child like this. From a young age your son has been conditioned to believe that he is not not good in studies, he doesn't focus and he doesn't sit in one place. All my sympathies are with your son...every child comes with immense potential and it's our duty as parents and teachers to nurture the child.

The following is what I propose so that we bring him back to loving to learn ( not score marks, that should never be the barometer)-
1. Love your child the way he is now
2. Give him lot of positive strokes
3. Have one on one sessions for any activity you plan for him... let him choose the activity, empower him
4. choose a teacher, who can get along with him and help him develop a positive attitude towards studies and life in general
5. look for a school where they nurture him... not just a reputed one...less number of students and a teacher who is invested in her/ his students,

If you can connect with me, I can help him. Have had many a students in this kind situation.
This is my website..
https://transformme.co.in/

Loads of best wishes to the whole family..