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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6508 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 08, 2024

Ramalingam Kalirajan has over 23 years of experience in mutual funds and financial planning.
He has an MBA in finance from the University of Madras and is a certified financial planner.
He is the director and chief financial planner at Holistic Investment, a Chennai-based firm that offers financial planning and wealth management advice.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jul 06, 2024Hindi
Money

25 Y , Male , MBA Graduate With 14L Principal+ 2 Lakhs Interest Loan, 1.5L One Time Bonus , 50k Per Month Disposable Income For Loan Repayment And Investments. Loan Repayment Not Started, Interest Is On SI Term RN. Please Advise Me How I Should Position My Investment And Loan Repayment In Next 5 Years Keeping My Step Up For Every Year As 10 Percent. Please Also Consider Term Plan And All The Other Necessary Investments To Start My Investment Journey.

Ans: First, congratulations on your MBA graduation. It's great that you’re planning your finances so early in your career. At 25 years old, you have a significant advantage by starting your investment journey now. Let's break down your financial situation and develop a plan to position your investments and loan repayment for the next five years.

Current Financial Snapshot
Age: 25 years old
Education Loan: Rs 14 lakh principal + Rs 2 lakh interest
One-Time Bonus: Rs 1.5 lakh
Monthly Disposable Income: Rs 50,000 (for loan repayment and investments)
Step-Up in Income: 10% annually
Interest: On simple interest (SI) term currently
Financial Goals
Loan Repayment: Pay off your education loan efficiently.
Investment Planning: Start a robust investment journey.
Insurance Coverage: Secure term insurance for financial protection.
Emergency Fund: Establish a safety net for unexpected expenses.
Loan Repayment Strategy
Utilizing Your Bonus
Use your one-time bonus of Rs 1.5 lakh to make an immediate lump-sum payment towards your education loan. This reduces the principal amount, decreasing the interest burden.

Monthly EMI Allocation
Allocate a significant portion of your disposable income towards monthly EMI payments. Given your Rs 50,000 disposable income, initially allocate Rs 30,000 towards your education loan repayment.

Increasing EMI Payments
With a 10% step-up in income annually, increase your EMI payments proportionally. This will help you pay off the loan faster and save on interest.

Prepayment Strategy
Whenever you receive any bonuses or windfalls, use a part of that amount for prepaying the loan. This reduces the principal faster and saves on interest payments.

Investment Planning
Starting your investment journey early allows you to benefit from the power of compounding. Here's how you can strategically invest:

Mutual Funds
Mutual funds are an excellent option for long-term wealth creation. They offer diversification and professional management.

Types of Mutual Funds
Large-Cap Funds: Invest in well-established companies for stability.
Mid-Cap Funds: Invest in medium-sized companies for growth potential.
Small-Cap Funds: Invest in smaller companies for higher returns, albeit with higher risk.
Balanced or Hybrid Funds: Mix of equity and debt, providing a balance of risk and return.
Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
Start a SIP with Rs 15,000 monthly in diversified mutual funds. SIPs allow you to invest regularly and average out market volatility.

Regular Fund Investment
Invest through a certified financial planner (CFP) who can guide you with regular fund investments. This ensures professional advice and better fund management.

Insurance Coverage
Term Insurance
Term insurance is essential to protect your family financially in case of any eventuality. Considering your age and financial obligations, opt for a term plan with a coverage of Rs 1 crore.

Health Insurance
Even if your employer provides health insurance, consider an additional personal health insurance policy. This ensures you have adequate coverage in case of medical emergencies.

Emergency Fund
Establishing an Emergency Fund
An emergency fund is crucial for financial stability. Aim to save at least 3 to 6 months' worth of living expenses.

Monthly Allocation
Allocate Rs 5,000 monthly towards building your emergency fund. Keep this fund in a liquid asset like a savings account or a liquid mutual fund for easy access.

Strategic Allocation and Review
Diversification and Risk Management
Diversify your investments to manage risk. Regularly review and adjust your portfolio to align with your financial goals and market conditions.

Increasing Investment with Income Growth
As your income grows, increase your investment amounts. With a 10% annual step-up, you can incrementally increase your SIP contributions and EMI payments.

Detailed Breakdown of Monthly Allocation
Initial Allocation (Year 1)
Loan Repayment EMI: Rs 30,000
Mutual Funds SIP: Rs 15,000
Emergency Fund: Rs 5,000
Annual Increment (10% Increase)
Loan Repayment EMI: Rs 33,000 (Year 2)
Mutual Funds SIP: Rs 16,500 (Year 2)
Emergency Fund: Rs 5,500 (Year 2)
Continue this pattern, incrementing your allocations each year by 10%.

Final Insights
By strategically allocating your resources, you can efficiently pay off your education loan while simultaneously building a strong investment portfolio. Starting early and consistently investing in diversified mutual funds will leverage the power of compounding to grow your wealth over time. Additionally, securing adequate insurance coverage and establishing an emergency fund will provide financial stability and protection against unforeseen circumstances. Regularly reviewing and adjusting your financial plan with the guidance of a certified financial planner will ensure you stay on track to achieve your financial goals.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6508 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 17, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 19, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hello Sir, I work in an IT firm, my monthly in hand salary is 1.6lakh, i have monthly EMI of car loan as 9542/-, LIC : 25750, SIP :10k and other house expenses like grocery, petrol and other miscellaneous around 15k. Total money left after all expenses : 110000/- Please let me know how should i invest this remaining money for maximum gains in 5 years
Ans: Your monthly in-hand salary is Rs. 1.6 lakh. You have a car loan EMI of Rs. 9,542 and LIC premiums of Rs. 25,750. Your SIP investments are Rs. 10,000, and household expenses total around Rs. 15,000. After these expenses, you are left with Rs. 1,10,000.

Investment Strategy for Maximum Gains
Emergency Fund
Firstly, create an emergency fund. This should cover at least 6 months of expenses. This fund should be in a liquid form. Consider a high-interest savings account or a liquid mutual fund.

Mutual Funds
Actively Managed Funds
Actively managed funds are a good choice. These funds have professional managers. They aim to outperform the market. This can provide higher returns over 5 years.

Balanced Funds
Balanced funds are another option. These funds invest in both equity and debt. They provide stability and growth. This can help balance risk and returns.

Recurring Deposits
Recurring deposits (RDs) offer fixed returns. They are a safe investment. You can invest a fixed amount monthly. This is suitable for systematic saving.

Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
You already have an SIP of Rs. 10,000. Consider increasing this amount. SIPs in mutual funds provide disciplined investment. They average out market volatility.

Public Provident Fund (PPF)
PPF is a government-backed savings scheme. It offers tax benefits and safe returns. Though it has a 15-year lock-in, partial withdrawals are allowed after 5 years.

National Savings Certificate (NSC)
NSC is a fixed income investment scheme. It is safe and offers decent returns. The maturity period is 5 years. It also provides tax benefits under Section 80C.

Fixed Deposits
Fixed deposits (FDs) offer guaranteed returns. They are safe and easy to manage. Senior citizens often get higher interest rates. Consider FDs for part of your savings.

Risk Assessment and Diversification
Risk Tolerance
Assess your risk tolerance. If you prefer low risk, opt for more debt instruments. If you are comfortable with risk, invest more in equities.

Diversification
Diversify your investments. Spread your money across various instruments. This reduces risk and enhances returns. A mix of mutual funds, FDs, and government schemes can be effective.

Professional Guidance
Certified Financial Planner
Consider consulting a Certified Financial Planner. They can help create a customised investment plan. Their expertise ensures you make informed decisions. This can maximise your gains over 5 years.

Tax Planning
Section 80C
Investments like PPF, NSC, and ELSS qualify for deductions under Section 80C. This can help reduce your taxable income. Plan your investments to take full advantage of tax benefits.

Health Insurance
Consider taking health insurance if you don't have it. Premiums paid for health insurance qualify for deductions under Section 80D. This also provides financial protection in case of medical emergencies.

Monitoring and Review
Regular Review
Regularly review your investments. Ensure they align with your goals. Adjust your portfolio as needed. This helps in keeping your investments on track.

Market Trends
Keep an eye on market trends. Stay updated with financial news. This can help you make timely decisions. Adapting to market changes can enhance returns.

Final Insights
Investing Rs. 1,10,000 monthly can significantly grow your wealth. Start with creating an emergency fund. Diversify your investments in mutual funds, RDs, PPF, and FDs. Assess your risk tolerance and plan accordingly. Consult a Certified Financial Planner for a tailored strategy. Regularly review and adjust your investments to stay aligned with your goals.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6508 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jul 04, 2024

Money
Hi I am 35 years old. My in hand salary is 3 lacs. I have 26 lacs in epf, 24 lacs in equity, 1.1 lacs in gold soverign bond. I have one flat worth 1.2cr with 30 lacs as loan . My monthly expense is 70k . My wife is home maker and i have 2 children(girl 9 years old, boy 4 years old) I want to retire after 5 years . After that i need atleast 1.2 lacs per month in hand. How should i plan my investment
Ans: It’s great to hear from you. You’ve done well with your savings and investments. Let's plan your investment strategy so you can retire comfortably in five years and ensure you have at least Rs. 1.2 lakhs per month in hand post-retirement.

Current Financial Snapshot
Age and Family: You are 35 years old, with a homemaker wife and two children (9-year-old daughter, 4-year-old son).

Income and Expenses: Your in-hand salary is Rs. 3 lakhs per month, and your monthly expenses are Rs. 70,000.

Investments and Assets:

EPF: Rs. 26 lakhs
Equity: Rs. 24 lakhs
Gold Sovereign Bonds: Rs. 1.1 lakhs
Flat worth Rs. 1.2 crores (with a Rs. 30 lakhs loan)
Retirement Goals
Retirement Age: 40 years
Monthly Income Post-Retirement: Rs. 1.2 lakhs in hand
Investment Strategy for Retirement Planning
Assessing Your Current Situation
You have a strong base with your current savings and investments. Let’s break it down:

EPF: A good foundation for your retirement savings.

Equity: This is your growth engine and needs to be managed well for maximum returns.

Gold Sovereign Bonds: These are good for diversification and stability.

Flat: A significant asset, but with an outstanding loan, the net value is lower.

Your immediate goal is to ensure you have enough income post-retirement. Here's a detailed plan:

1. Enhance Your Equity Investments
Equity investments are crucial for long-term growth. Since you have Rs. 24 lakhs in equity, ensure it's diversified across various sectors and market caps (large-cap, mid-cap, small-cap).

Benefits of Actively Managed Funds:

Professional Management: Fund managers actively monitor and adjust the portfolio.
Potential for Higher Returns: They aim to outperform benchmarks.
Risk Management: They adjust portfolios to mitigate risks during market volatility.
Action Points:

Increase your monthly SIPs in equity mutual funds. Aim for a mix of large-cap for stability, and mid-cap and small-cap for growth.
Review and rebalance your portfolio annually to ensure it aligns with your goals.
2. Maximize Your EPF Contributions
EPF is a safe and tax-efficient retirement saving option. Keep contributing to it regularly.

Action Points:

Continue your EPF contributions till you retire.
Consider voluntary contributions (VPF) if possible to increase your retirement corpus.
3. Diversify with Debt Instruments
Diversification is essential. While equity offers growth, debt instruments provide stability.

Debt Instruments Include:

Corporate Bonds: Offer higher returns than fixed deposits but with some risk.
Debt Mutual Funds: Provide stable returns with lower risk compared to equities.
Government Bonds: Safe but with moderate returns.
Action Points:

Allocate a portion of your savings to debt instruments for stability.
Consider debt mutual funds for a balanced portfolio.
4. Utilize Gold Sovereign Bonds
Gold bonds provide a hedge against inflation and are a good diversification tool.

Action Points:

Hold onto your gold sovereign bonds for diversification.
Consider adding more during dips in gold prices for long-term holding.
5. Manage Your Real Estate Investment
Your flat is a significant asset. Reducing the outstanding loan can increase your net worth.

Action Points:

Accelerate loan repayment if possible. It reduces interest outflow and increases net savings.
Consider the rental income post-retirement if you decide to let out the property.
6. Emergency Fund and Insurance
An emergency fund is crucial to cover unexpected expenses. Adequate insurance protects against unforeseen events.

Action Points:

Maintain an emergency fund covering 6-12 months of expenses in a liquid fund.
Ensure your health and life insurance covers are adequate.
7. Education and Marriage Planning for Children
Planning for your children’s education and marriage is essential.

Action Points:

Start dedicated SIPs in mutual funds for their education and marriage expenses.
Consider child-specific investment plans for long-term savings.
Creating a Retirement Corpus
To generate Rs. 1.2 lakhs per month post-retirement, you need a substantial retirement corpus. Here’s how to approach it:

Estimate Your Retirement Corpus
Calculate the amount needed for 25-30 years post-retirement considering inflation.
Aim for a corpus that generates Rs. 1.2 lakhs per month through systematic withdrawals or interest/dividends.
Investment Vehicles for Retirement Corpus
Equity Mutual Funds:

Continue and increase SIPs for growth.
Choose a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and small-cap funds for diversification.
Debt Mutual Funds:

Invest in debt funds for stability and regular income.
Consider a mix of short-term, medium-term, and long-term debt funds.
Hybrid Funds:

Invest in balanced or hybrid funds that combine equity and debt.
These offer a good mix of growth and stability.
Fixed Income Instruments:

Invest in instruments like PPF, EPF, and government bonds for assured returns.
Withdrawal Strategy Post-Retirement
Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP):

Use SWPs in mutual funds for regular income.
Plan withdrawals to meet your monthly needs without depleting the corpus quickly.
Dividends and Interest Income:

Use dividends from mutual funds and interest from fixed income investments.
Ensure a mix of growth and income-generating assets.
Regular Monitoring and Rebalancing
Annual Review:

Regularly review your investment portfolio.
Make adjustments based on market conditions and life changes.
Rebalance Portfolio:

Rebalance your portfolio to maintain the desired asset allocation.
Shift from high-risk to low-risk investments as you approach retirement.
Final Insights
You've built a strong financial foundation. With careful planning and disciplined investing, you can achieve your retirement goal comfortably.

Focus on maximizing your current investments in equity, EPF, and gold. Diversify with debt instruments for stability and maintain a balanced portfolio.

Plan for your children's future needs and ensure you have adequate insurance coverage. Regularly review and adjust your investment strategy to stay on track.

With dedication and strategic planning, you can secure a prosperous retirement and enjoy financial freedom.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Moneywize

Moneywize   |164 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner - Answered on Jul 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 23, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
I am NRI with salary of Rs 50 lakh per annum, having savings of Rs 1.8 cr out of which Rs 70 lakh are invested in alternate investment plan which will be matured by 2025. I also have SIP of Rs 1 lakh per month in six different funds, Rs 75 lakh in equities, Rs 50 lakh in FDs which earns 6.75 per cent. I have Rs 20 lakh as emergency liquid funds in savings accounts of various banks. I also have 200,000 US dollars as savings in my overseas account. I am looking for a monthly income of 10 lakh after five years. How shall I go about my investments to meet my goals five years later.
Ans: Strong Financial Position: You have a substantial income, significant savings, and a diversified investment portfolio. This is an excellent foundation to achieve your goal of a Rs 10 lakh monthly income in five years.

Key Considerations:

• Risk Tolerance: Your comfort level with market fluctuations will determine the asset allocation in your portfolio.
• Tax Implications: As an NRI, understanding the tax implications of your investments is crucial. Consider consulting a tax advisor.
• Inflation: Your desired income of Rs 10 lakh per month in five years should account for inflation.

Building a Strategy:

1. Maximise Returns on Existing Investments:

• Review SIPs: Ensure your SIPs are aligned with your risk profile and long-term goals. Consider consolidating them into fewer funds for better management.
• Equities: Given your long-term horizon, continue holding your equity investments. Rebalancing periodically based on market conditions can optimize returns.
• FDs: While FDs provide stability, consider exploring higher-yielding alternatives like debt mutual funds or corporate bonds for a portion of your FD investments.

2. Leverage the Maturing Alternative Investment:

• Strategic Allocation: Use the Rs 70 lakh maturing in 2025 wisely. Consider reinvesting a portion in equity-oriented funds for growth and another part in debt or hybrid funds for income generation.
• Diversification: Spread the amount across different asset classes to manage risk.

3. Increase Monthly Income Generation:

• Systematic Withdrawal Plan (SWP): Once you have a substantial corpus, consider starting an SWP from your equity and debt funds to generate regular income.
• Rental Income: If feasible, explore real estate investments for rental income.
• Dividend-Paying Stocks: Invest in stocks that offer regular dividends to supplement your income.

4. Optimise Overseas Savings:

• Currency Hedging: Consider hedging your USD savings against rupee depreciation to protect your wealth.
• Global Investment Options: Explore investment opportunities in your country of residence if they offer higher returns.

5. Regular Review and Adjustments:

• Market Dynamics: Monitor market conditions and adjust your portfolio accordingly.
• Financial Goals: Reassess your financial goals periodically and make necessary changes to your investment strategy.

Potential Investment Avenues

• Equity Mutual Funds: For long-term growth.
• Debt Mutual Funds: For regular income and capital preservation.
• Hybrid Funds: A balance of equity and debt for moderate risk and return.
• Real Estate: For rental income and potential appreciation.
• Annuities: For guaranteed income post-retirement.

Disclaimer: This information is general in nature and should not be considered as financial advice. It's essential to consult with a financial advisor to tailor a strategy that aligns with your specific financial situation and goals.

By following a disciplined investment approach and regularly reviewing your portfolio, you can increase your chances of achieving your goal of a Rs 10 lakh monthly income in five years.

..Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |6508 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Aug 12, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 05, 2024Hindi
Money
hi i am working in govt university as assistant professor. my age is 44 years. my annual income 14 lakhs. i am invested only in real state through personal loan. emi 29000. no other investment has been done . i have two sons . pl suggest the investment plan for me
Ans: With an annual income of Rs 14 lakhs, your financial stability is commendable. However, your primary investment is in real estate through a personal loan, with an EMI of Rs 29,000. Having two sons also means you need to plan for their future expenses, including education and other essential needs.

Your current investment strategy, focused solely on real estate, may not be the most effective approach for long-term financial growth and security. Diversification is key to ensuring a balanced and robust financial future.

Assessing Your Investment Goals
Before diving into specific investment options, it's essential to define your financial goals. These might include:

Building a Retirement Corpus: You should plan for a comfortable retirement, given your current age of 44 years. Ideally, you would want to retire with a significant corpus that can provide a steady income post-retirement.

Children’s Education: With two sons, planning for their higher education should be a priority. Education costs are rising, and it's wise to start investing early to meet these expenses without financial strain.

Emergency Fund: Having an emergency fund is crucial. It ensures you have immediate access to funds in case of unforeseen circumstances. Typically, an emergency fund should cover 6-12 months of living expenses.

Health and Life Insurance: Adequate health and life insurance coverage is necessary to protect your family in case of any unfortunate event. This ensures that your family’s financial future is secure.

Building a Diversified Investment Portfolio
Now that you have a clear understanding of your financial goals, let’s explore how to diversify your investment portfolio beyond real estate.

1. Systematic Investment in Mutual Funds
Mutual funds offer an excellent opportunity to grow your wealth over time. They provide diversification, professional management, and a range of options to suit different risk appetites.

Equity Mutual Funds: These funds invest in stocks and have the potential for higher returns over the long term. Given your age, you can consider a mix of large-cap, mid-cap, and multi-cap funds. These funds are ideal for long-term goals like retirement and children's education.

Debt Mutual Funds: These are safer options compared to equity funds and are suitable for short to medium-term goals. They invest in fixed-income securities and provide steady returns with lower risk. Consider allocating a portion of your investments to debt funds to balance risk.

Balanced Funds: These funds invest in both equities and debt instruments, offering a balance of growth and stability. They are suitable for investors looking for moderate risk with steady returns.

Why Choose Actively Managed Funds?

Avoid index funds as they simply track the market and do not provide the expertise of a fund manager. Actively managed funds, on the other hand, are managed by experts who aim to outperform the market. This approach can potentially provide better returns, especially in a fluctuating market.

2. Systematic Investment Plan (SIP)
A SIP is a disciplined way to invest regularly in mutual funds. It allows you to invest a fixed amount every month, regardless of market conditions. This strategy helps in rupee cost averaging and building a substantial corpus over time.

Given your EMI of Rs 29,000, it’s advisable to start with a SIP amount that you are comfortable with. Even a modest monthly investment can grow significantly over the years due to the power of compounding.

3. Public Provident Fund (PPF)
The PPF is a long-term savings scheme backed by the government, offering tax benefits and attractive interest rates. It is a risk-free investment option suitable for conservative investors. The PPF comes with a lock-in period of 15 years, making it ideal for building a retirement corpus or meeting long-term goals like your children’s education.

4. Term Insurance
As a responsible family person, securing your family's future is paramount. A term insurance policy provides a high life cover at an affordable premium. Ensure you have adequate term insurance that covers your family’s needs in case of your untimely demise. The coverage should be at least 10-15 times your annual income to provide sufficient financial security to your family.

5. Health Insurance
Given the rising healthcare costs, having adequate health insurance coverage is essential. Ensure you have a comprehensive health insurance policy that covers yourself and your family. You can opt for a family floater policy, which covers all members under a single plan. This will help you manage any unforeseen medical expenses without dipping into your savings.

6. Emergency Fund
If you don't already have one, start building an emergency fund immediately. This fund should be easily accessible and stored in a liquid instrument such as a savings account or liquid mutual fund. Aim to save 6-12 months of your living expenses, which will cover your family’s needs in case of emergencies like job loss or medical crises.

Steps to Implement Your Investment Plan
Now that we have discussed various investment options, here’s how you can implement this plan:

Step 1: Assess Your Monthly Budget: After accounting for your EMI, determine how much you can comfortably allocate towards investments.

Step 2: Start SIPs in Mutual Funds: Begin with a SIP in a balanced mutual fund. As you become comfortable, gradually increase the SIP amount and diversify into equity and debt funds.

Step 3: Open a PPF Account: Consider opening a PPF account and start contributing regularly. This will be part of your long-term savings plan.

Step 4: Purchase Adequate Insurance: Ensure you have both term and health insurance in place. Review your existing coverage and enhance it if necessary.

Step 5: Build an Emergency Fund: Gradually build an emergency fund by setting aside a fixed amount every month. Keep this fund liquid and accessible.

Step 6: Regularly Review Your Portfolio: Periodically review your investment portfolio to ensure it aligns with your financial goals. Adjust your investments if necessary, based on market conditions and your risk tolerance.

Final Insights
You have already taken the first step towards financial security by investing in real estate. However, relying solely on real estate is not enough to meet your long-term goals. Diversifying your portfolio with mutual funds, PPF, and insurance will provide a balanced approach to wealth creation and risk management.

By systematically investing in mutual funds through SIPs, you can build a substantial corpus for your retirement and your children’s education. Additionally, securing adequate term and health insurance will protect your family’s future.

Remember, it's never too late to start investing. By taking these steps, you will be on the right path to achieving your financial goals and securing a comfortable future for your family.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

..Read more

Latest Questions
Anu

Anu Krishna  |1186 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 05, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 02, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi Madam. I am married from last one and half years now, there has been numerous fights in between small and big ones both. In between this time I have become a mother, and, my baby is 7 months old now. My husband does nothing, did nothing in past one and half years. He is only occupied with his work all the time, he goes to office everyday mostly. Right now my baby is 7 months old and from last 7 months me and my parents are taking care of the baby. And, he absolutely shows no understanding when it comes to looking after the baby. Am also a working person. Moreover I pay all the bills when it comes to getting household stuff, paying rent, all the expenses related to baby. He is so shameless that he just doesn’t care too, when I pick these topics or raise concerns about handling the baby he gets abusive. I am not sure what to do now! How insensible can a person get if no one sees my husband would never feel that person like him exist in this world. I feel like filing a divorce petition now. He was the one who wanted to have baby so soon. I was never ready. Now when I have the baby I am the only person along with my parents and sister looking after the baby.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Your husband wants a family without responsibilities and that's why neither is he interested in the baby nor in paying the bills...This is not just insensitivity but lack of emotional immaturity and the unwillingness to take on responsibilities head on...Approach a senior male member within the family who is someone that has been a role model to others in terms executing family responsibilities and is also caring and affectionate. This person can appeal to your husband and talk some sense into him.

If there's no one that fits the bill, the only option is to go to a professional for Couples Therapy. There's a reason why your husband avoids his duties as a husband and father and that needs to be uncovered and sorted out. It will also help the two of bond and connect better. Make this attempt before jumping into divorce; separating is a whole different world that comes with its own set of challenges and with the baby now in the picture, work at the marriage and putting things together.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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