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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |608 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jul 25, 2023

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jul 19, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

I have started liking a girl enough. I didn't have such feeling. But slowly I have become quite attached to him. Her name is Vaishnavi Singh. Vaishnavi was born on 11 August 2003. My name is Ajit Kumar and I was born on 17 October 1999. We both used to talk a lot, used to talk on calls till 3 in the morning, but suddenly she started keeping distance from me and now she has blocked me from everywhere. It is not even that she has gone in relation with any boy. Can we both get into a relationship?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I understand you are having a tough time. Sometimes, people just choose to leave. It can be difficult to accept it but when someone blocks you from everywhere, it is a pretty clear indication that they don't want to be in touch with you. I know it hurts right now, but this will pass. Right now you might not realize it, but you don't want to be with someone who does not reciprocates the same feeling as you.

Even if she isn't in a relationship with another person, she is free to leave. It isn't fair, but that's life. Work on yourself. Hold your head high and move on. And so far as getting into a relationship with her is concerned, that isn't a possibility. She has made that clear. The best course of action here is to give yourself time to accept the situation and move on with your life.

Best Wishes!

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Love Guru

Love Guru   | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on May 30, 2022

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Hello Sir or Madam. Please keep me as anonymous only. Let me tell my story. I am 29 now. Work for an MNC for the past six years. From middle class family with big circle. Before going to speak out on my problem, let me tell my nature, how I was brought up, studies and attitude. Since we are middle class family with no financial crisis, I never seen ups and downs in Life accordingly. In the case of studies, I was topper at all levels of education till MBA from reputed institute. I was like love is trash n waste of time. When I used to hear all love stories, I used to feel pity on them. But I did maintain very good relationship with many, many girls (not GF type). But now I am going through the hell just because of one girl whom I was forcibly loved her and later I addicted to her with true love. During COVID I had to go WFH for two years. She visited her granny’s house and stayed back for few weeks. They live in Bangalore. I have never seen her face or noticed her during the time when she stayed. But she noticed, observed and enquired about me. So once she left to Bangalore, she sent FB request and I accepted. Immediately we have exchanged numbers and started texting ‘n’ talking. Initially I rejected her since she is eight years junior to me. Later she emotionally told once as she lost her father very recently and she just don’t want to go into depression again if I reject her. I got convinced and started loving truly. I replaced her father in her life which she used to tell. One day, she got caught by her brother while she was on call with me. Since we belong to different castes, they rejected me. She got house arrested. There was no connection between us. First time in life I fell into depression. I lost my job after just three weeks when she got separated from me. I was unable to speak anyone in the world. My family ‘n’ circle was afraid as I may do harm to myself for her. On December 16, 2021, I tried to commit suicide by writing a letter in laptop to her telling how I was missing her ‘n’ needed her. Took print and left to railway track to die. I took alcohol and was on the track. Someone rescued me and took me to hometown from Bangalore with PAN card address which was in my purse. Every day I was losing hope on my life. Finally I got call from her number in the first week of Jan. I was happy and cried like anything with her on call. She told that she would never leave me alone whatever happens ‘n’ who ever tries to separate us. Again, I took my energy ‘n’ hopes back and started job searching. There was 1 month gap again until Feb 8, 2022. After that she used to call me whenever it is possible. From March 15 to March 31, she kept fighting with me over call and spoken mercilessly. There was no kindness or love or concern on me. Again, I lost hope on my life. She kept asking me to stay away from her. She knew that I cannot initiate contact from my end, since she only should do whenever she able to do. Day by day, I am losing interest on my Life. I left the job. Now I’m alone with her thoughts and words spoken by her. My family n circle knew all this drama what’s going on. They hate me for losing self-respect for a girl. But I have never seen that girl as a girl. I am addicted to alcohol, day ‘n’ night drinking and surviving. I knew she won’t come back if I ruin my life like this by drinking ‘n’ all. But I just can’t control myself over her. The promises which she made me were gone... But still I stand for her, for what I promised. I begged the girl like anything not to leave me alone. I just can’t digest that she won’t be no more for me. N number of the times I used to tell her that You are my first priority over all in my life, like family, siblings, money, career and what not. Most of the times I told her that I’ll commit suicide for you if I come to know that you are not there for me. It doesn’t mean that I am an emotional fool who does not know how to live or unable to get another girl. But you have such significance in my life. I elaborated as much as I can. But she never listened me. I am just wonder where was her sweet words ‘n’ promises, what’s the reality now? I am upset with me -- where was original me and who I am now without self-respect. My parents ‘n’ siblings are forcing me to give up on her. As per them, she is just a golddigger and cheater without love and trust... My mind n heart never ever forgets her. Don’t know the future. But many times I pray God to kill me in sleep itself without pain so I can reach Venkateshwara... Entire world is against that girl, but I am defending her at every passing moment. Human beings invented many amazing things. My wish is we should be available with tablets or injection which can erase memories which belongs to particular person or for particular time in life... The real enemy to the human beings is LOVE.... Finally I am just waiting for my death... I knew that she won’t realise even if I die also. But I should sleep forever and ever just because for the crime I did love her.... Dear Bujji, it’s for you. I am also a human being as like U. As like your mother, even my mother has given birth to me. Finally, no words.... I am alone... Memories are hunting me.... chasing me... Love Guru, please publish this story as it is. Because someone may going through hell with similar story at least they will read the Q&A as well. Love Guru... I hate me... I do have all with me -- good health, 21 LPA job now, stabilised family and friends ‘n’ family circle... But this bloody struggling to get her love amongst the 7 billion people on this Earth... Love Guru, I feel that I lost. I am feeling low... I got cheated by her... Finally I am nothing to her. Dear readers, don’t think that why this fool is suffering for a girl like this.... I have seen her my GODDESS... Thank you... Have a nice day…
Ans:

You’ve needlessly wound yourself up over a silly girl.

You don’t even sound like you’ve had a physical relationship, it was only long distance, so what are you getting so out of joint for? A few intimate conversations with someone who said one thing but meant another?

If things in your life are spiralling so much out of control, I’d suggest therapy.

Stop drinking before it becomes a real problem. It sounds like you’re doing this to yourself deliberately, so that you receive some attention from her.

But the more you do this, the worse the situation will get. And no woman wants an out-of-control, desperate, alcoholic lover!

For heavens’ sake, man, get a hold of yourself and, if you can’t, then get the professional help you need. 

..Read more

Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 12, 2023

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Relationship
I am in love with a girl for almost 2 years..but she loves some other guy which is mutual...but this girl is in touch with me on and off...sometimes she returns my WhatsApp messages...I just wanna know that is she still in love with that guy,(breakup)..bcoz at times I go beyond the line speaking sexually with her which she never encourages but till now she doesnt block me...also close with my family to some extent...Is there a possibility of my getting married to her ?
Ans: Based on what you've shared, it sounds like the girl you're in love with is currently in a mutual relationship with someone else. It's important to respect her feelings and her current commitment to someone else. Even though she may still be in touch with you, it doesn't necessarily mean that she's interested in pursuing a relationship with you.

It's not appropriate to go beyond the line and speak sexually with someone who has not given you clear signals that they are interested in that kind of conversation. It's important to respect boundaries and communicate clearly and openly with each other.

It's difficult to say whether there is a possibility of you getting married to her in the future. Ultimately, that decision would be up to her, and it's important to respect her choices and decisions, even if they're not the ones that you would hope for.

If you find that your feelings for this girl are causing you distress or interfering with your ability to move on, it may be helpful to seek support from a trusted friend, family member, or mental health professional. They can provide a listening ear, help you process your emotions, and offer guidance on healthy coping strategies.

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |608 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 20, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 27, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
So, i've started talking to this girl who was a classmate during my college. We've never talked all this time... But we started talking only after 7 years... She was currently working near my home town.. and i am working in a neighbouring state. It is 3 or 4months now.. we are talking and we liked each other...like.. we were in the same situations in life... Like.. we both lost our mothers.. and we are from the same community.. but the deadlock came here in the guise of religion. She belongs to one and i belong to another... Even though we both from same caste... We had a discussion before like.. even though we like each other... she cant move forward in relation because of religion. We had am understanding for sometime... But recently we had a discussion over the same topic and we had a fight... Now the girl and i are not fully talking to each other... Cause she was frightened on what could happen to us if we move forward in a relationship and it fails... Because we are not a stage to try and test things because we both are 29 and you know how it will be in family for a girl... So pleaseee give me advice how to save this relationship... Because i dont want to miss this girl at all. Please...
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I understand that you are in a tough spot, but if she has truly made up her mind not to proceed with the relationship, especially based on something as sensitive as religion, I cannot advise you to pursue her or try to convince her further. The only thing you can do is have one last open discussion where you express your feelings and the things you are willing to do to make this relationship work out. And for one last time, you can ask her, and only ask, if she would be willing to give it another try. If the answer is still a no, I am sorry, but it would not be wise to continue pushing this. If religion is important to her or an integral part of her family values, it would be selfish to ask her to set that aside for you.

I hope things work out for you.


Best Wishes.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |615 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 04, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 16, 2024Hindi
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Hi mam, im a lecturer since 5 years. Im in relationship with a girl from Srilanka. Most of our conversation was through mobile. She is a tutor in srilanka for 10 and below standard students. Now I'm 29, she is 27. Since 5 years we are loving each other. We hardly met. In Krishnagiri Tamilnadu I first met her in a Psychotherapy course, witch was about a month. We were good friends in the beginning of our relationship and at the end of a month course she was flying back to Srilanka, before she goes she kissed on my forehead, from then on im in love with the girl. For first few years we were happy in our relationship, but last two years onwards we fight almost every day. Both sides parents are fixing matches, both us are rejecting all the matches but we never shared with our families. Don't know where our relationship is going to end. Its not that my parents won't accept, but when my parents and siblings ask do you any one whom you want marry, or love some one I am not able to reveal to them. Many times I decided and planned and imagined to speak with my family but when it comes to reality im not able to speak. Other side she also is not revealing anything to her parents. Im rejecting the matches that are coming, she is also rejecting of hers. But both are not speaking properly now a days. Most of the time our relationship is filled with fights. Both are adjusting. Some time im feeling to stop the relationship and not to marry at all. I told her to marry as her parents say, and I don't want marry anyone. She is also saying me to marry some one and she wants remain single. But don't know what is happening between us. Im confused to continue or break up or marry her or not to marry her. Nothing is working in my mind. Recently my parents have brought a proposal who was my childhood crush. Suddenly I am indirectly telling her to marry to whom her parents give. She also getting good proposals but rejecting saying that she needs to work and earn money. Same reason I'm also giving. One more issue is she is tamilian of Srilanka and I'm Telugu from Andra. Both family members can't speak directly also. Unable to take any decisions. Kindly help me
Ans: The fact that you're not able to communicate openly with your families, despite rejecting matches on both sides, shows that there might be some fear or hesitation about fully committing to this relationship. Maybe it’s the distance, the cultural and language differences, or the struggles you’re having recently in your relationship that are making it difficult to move forward.

On the other hand, both of you seem to be stuck in a cycle where you're not happy but also not ready to let go. This might be causing even more stress and frustration, leading to the frequent fights. The decision to stay together or part ways is something only you both can make, but it sounds like there’s a lot of unresolved tension and unspoken fears in your relationship.

One thing to consider is having an honest conversation with each other, not about the fights or current frustrations, but about what you both want for the future. If you're both rejecting matches, it shows some level of commitment, but the real question is whether you both see a future together. Do you still love each other, or are you staying together out of habit and fear of the unknown?

If you both feel there is still something worth fighting for, it might be worth giving the relationship another chance by opening up to your families. This could ease the pressure you're feeling and help you both feel more supported. If, however, the love has faded and the fights have taken over, it may be time to re-evaluate whether staying together is what's best for both of you.

In any case, clarity will only come through open communication—both with her and your family. If you continue to stay in a relationship without making a clear decision, the frustration and confusion will likely grow. Take some time to reflect on what you really want, and then take the courageous step of addressing it with her and your families. This may not be easy, but it’s the first step to finding a resolution and peace in your heart.

..Read more

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Adarsh

Adarsh Rai  |12 Answers  |Ask -

HR, Leadership coach - Answered on Jul 03, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 11, 2025Hindi
Career
Hi. I am currently 29. Married with no kids. Wife not earning. Planning for a kid this year. Monthly earning 60k post tax. Have savings of 2 lakhs. Have personal loan of 9 lakhs. Monthly expenses 40k including emi's. I have lost interest in job and I don't want to work anymore. I want to do business which can give monthly 50 to 60k income. Max I can invest 2lakhs. Is there any business which I can start with 2 lakhs and generate monthly income of 60k ? I am frustrated with working under an employer. I want to start my own venture. Please suggest.
Ans: Spandan, pause before you mail the resignation.

Your maths
60 k take-home
40 k spends (15 k of that is EMI on a 9 L loan)
→ 20 k buffer

A newborn will nudge monthly costs up by 8-10 k. Cash cushion shrinks fast.

So the plan must earn while you learn, not leap blind.

Keep the paycheck six more months.
Use evenings to test micro-ideas. Risk stays capped at ?0 for now.

Choose a “cash-this-month” niche, not a moon-shot.
Pick work that turns inventory ≤ ?50 k into sales inside 30 days.

Tiffin + office snacks (two dishes, 40 boxes) - ?25 k utensils, ?10 k FSSAI, ?5 k flyers - ?120 per box × 40 = ?4.8 k /day

Amazon / Flipkart reselling (phone cases, cables) ?40 k stock, ?15 k ads 25 % net margin on ?2 L monthly sales = ?50 k

Weekend print-on-demand & personalised gifting kiosk ?45 k heat-press kit (other options are there too) ?300 profit per mug × 200 pcs → ?60 k Bring Your Mug - Take Away Memories.

Local social-media management for clinics & salons ?0 gear, ?3 k Canva Pro ?8 k-?12 k per client; 6 clients hit target

None need heavy staff or rent. All can run beside your day job.

Set one simple goal: ?15 k profit by Day-30.
Hit it twice, raise target to ?35 k. Only when side income beats salary three months straight do you quit.

This is critical - Plug leaks early. Refinance personal loan to longer tenor; shave EMI to ~?10 k.

Park 1 L of savings in an emergency account—no touch.Skill up tiny, daily.
Watch a YouTube on ad copy, take a WhatsApp course on GST filings. Low cost, immediate payback.

Start small, sell fast, reinvest every rupee. Freedom comes, but by steps, not by one loud jump.

...Read more

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