Anu Krishna |1267 Answers |Ask -Follow
Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 15, 2021
Since the day of marriage, I am having regular fights with my wife concerning my mother and sisters.
Of late, I am feeling like I have lost the love between the two of us. We have stopped talking and don’t get a chance to spend some time together.
Whenever we do, we end up arguing about past mistakes and all. We never talk about the future.
During this pandemic second wave, we came to our native place and after spending some good days, she went to her home for some days and now she is not willing to come back.
We recently had a fight over phone and stopped talking. I started calling her and talking to her but she does not seem to be in a mood to talk.
Now I have stopped talking to her.
I am a bit worried as I feel like I am left alone. Despite so many efforts towards her and her family, she finds a reason to get pissed at me every time.
I am not sure anymore what to do. I try to make her understand. We are in the same situation for 4 years.
If I don't, she won't be taking any initiative from her end.
Relationships can have a long life if we are willing to set aside our differences and keep egos at bay. Now read on and think deeper about these questions.
What went on between your wife and mother/sisters? Did you wife end up feeling hurt and lonely? Did she feel that you sided with your mother and sisters more than you did with her?
Constant arguments about things from the past honestly can lead to no good. It is important to know what exactly your wife feels at this very moment, but it seems like she doesn’t want to talk to you.
When you say you have made many efforts towards her and her family, why do you think, she hasn’t come back home or why has she stopped talking to you?
You did mention that she finds a reason to get pissed, but is there something that she expects from you or a certain behaviour that might help her get to an even ground?
Will involving a senior family member to talk to someone senior family member (not your mother) on her side?
With their experiences and their calm minds, they maybe able to break the ice between both sides and get the two of you to talk.
Please find a neutral member on both sides who can arrange for this in a wise manner without bringing in egos or past battles inside.
Communication must be re-established and throwing your hands up in the air may not be very useful if you want your marriage to continue.
Yes, past need not be brought back into the present, but it is necessary to understand what is going on in her mind before concluding anything.
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