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Pooja

Pooja Khera  | Answer  |Ask -

Life, Relationship Coach - Answered on Feb 01, 2023

Pooja Khera has a PGDM in human resources from Amity University and is a happiness and wellbeing coach certified by Yale University. She also has a master's degree in astrology and is a tarot card reader as well.... more
Hemantkumar Question by Hemantkumar on Jan 30, 2023Hindi
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Dear Pooja, How can someone with social anxiety make their partner happy if it’s hard for them to go out on dates?

Ans: Hi there! If you are someone that has social anxiety then the first and most important step is to make your partner understand what exactly is that you face and experience. An honest, transparent and upfront communication where you and your partner both can speak their hearts out without any fear is the first and foremost step. If you feel that none of your attempts are working then counselling is a very good way where the coach our counsellor like me will help partners understand each other. You could also jointly look at choosing the kind of places where both of you would be happy & comfortable. E.g. In some people with social anxiety, I have seen that lesser crowded restaurants or open spaces work instead of loud, full places. So in case there are places like this you could both jointly identify and be together should help as well.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1651 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 21, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 20, 2023Hindi
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hi , I am a 40 year old man with 2 kids and wife , aged parents .Financially and health wise i am doing good and working in a reputed mnc. My relationship with parents , wife ,kids and siblings is in good spirits . however i am an introvert and don't have many friends .while i had friends in childhood and youth however they have moved in there life .i want to have an improved social life and also have joined a course to improve social skills and more strong relationship socially and at work . As course suggest to approach people , however i still don't approach/talk to people when opportunity is there .i also tried to have more positive attitude towards other people ..however still sometimes i start criticizing them in my mind...and sometimes i feel that approaching /talking may belittle me in front of them,,,, and talking /approaching opposite sex is even more difficult ... any suggestion to improve on this part and how i can improve my social life and get/find company of like minded people .
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Two things to understand here:
1. You are an introvert and you are happy being one
2. You are a forced introvert as you are unable to break the walls that you have put around you.

If you belong to the first category, enjoy the state of bliss as is. But from what I gather, you seem to falling under the second category wherein you want to expand your social circle and be a part of activities etc.
Then you have to put yourself out there.
1. Do understand that as much you want to be engaged with like-minded people, even these people will at some point in time think different from you.
2. Do accept people for who they are and that way you will come from a non-judgemental space while engaging with them.
3. Do connect with people who are totally different from you and it will help you expand your mind to be curious about them.

If this is a difficult thing to do...think....What if one of your children came to you with the same problem that you have now? What would you tell them to do?
Also, get into circles on social media that discuss topics which interest you. Join a gym or a hobby class and that is an avenue to make new friends irrespective of gender.
To add more friends, you need to be friendly as well...so open your heart and mind...

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1651 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 05, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 04, 2025Hindi
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I am a single 34 year old man from Delhi, i was always socially anxious and never had a girlfriend, i have worked on my social skills in the past few years and have a stable career thanks to a good pyschatrist who treated me for depression and anxiety and now its under control. I often feel the need of a partner in life but i feel that i don't deserve one because of my past and i cannot handle the responsibility of married life, this makes me feel that i should stay single and adapt to the single life. Another reason is that i earn well enough for myself but not enough to run a family. I feel that if i get married i must give my best to my partner, but i don't want to let her down. Currently i try to save half my salary every month because of this fear. Can you please let me know what i should do?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
if you live your life with ifs and buts, that's exactly how your life will turn out; always tentative and with a lot to worry about. Does your past define how things must be now for you? You have changed and also know how to handle things when they don;t go your way. So, no point in doubting things and wondering if they are meant for you or not. It's matter of moving ahead with confidence and also understanding that not everything will work but somethings will and that's good enough. So, be out there and I am sure that someone like-minded will hit it off with you.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

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Sunil

Sunil Lala  |218 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner - Answered on Jul 18, 2025

Money
Dear Sir, I am 40 year old, my take home is 1.41 lacs per month. I have 11 year old daughter and 3.5 year old son. I am investing 12.5k per month in SSY (27 lacs in total) and 12.5k per month in PPF (6 lacs in total). Investing around 4k in SIP in index fund (1.2 lacs) and I have around 30 lacs in FD. I have taken 1cr term insurance and have 10lakhs health insurance for family. FD is not giving me satisfactory returns and not beating the inflation. I am planning to invest 25 lacs in buying a site. I don't have any loans and don't have major commitment other than children education. I request you to guide me on future investments, I would like to get a constant income of 1-1.5 lacs PM after 5-6 years.
Ans: Hi Ajay, understand the SSY and PPF are also not givin you enough returns, your SIP in index funds and FD all are ineffecient return making assets. Buying a site will not ensure liquidity when you will need it the most, and 10L health insurance for a family of 4 is low as well.
Having a constant income of 1-1.5L p.m. means annually 12-18L of income, and to have a passive income like that, your corpus should be 15-16x of the annual income --> which means we are looking at 1.8Cr to 2.7Cr of corpus in the next 5-6 years.
There are a lot of flaws in your investment strategies because at one place you are wanting to lock in money at a site, in SSY and PPF and on the other you are looking to earn 1-1.5L p.m. which is possible through liquid investments.
I would love to help you out, but to me it feels like there is a gap in the knowledge about investments and personal finance. If you are wanting to have a detailed conversation about your investments and where you can park your money to grow it to have the monthly income you want after a certain number of years, visit my website www.slwealthsolutions.com

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Sunil

Sunil Lala  |218 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner - Answered on Jul 18, 2025

Money
I m a 44 yrs old . My salary 85k net per month. Rent income 1.20 lakh per month. Fixed deposit 46 lakh PPF 21.35 lakh Lap loan 46.50 lakh OD loan 6.50 lakh. Mutual funds 2.75 lakhs Shares 3.25 laks Property in Noida, jewar, dwarka , Rohini and faridbad. My wife is earning 50k per month but not contributing in assests we spend his salary on vacations and foods and cloths as she don't want to save. According to her it is my responsibility to provide foods and investment. At this age I m going to lose my jobs. I can manage all things with rental but how can I build up financial assets from here on and my triple source like salary, rental and interest helps me a lot in past. I m simple man with basic needs no extra expenses on me. But kids are in college in class 9 how can I build assests and ensure their good education
Ans: Hello Sanjiv, you have a lot of money parked in debt instruments like FD, PPF and not-liquid assets like properties as well. I would advise you to calculate your income from each asset on a yearly basis in % terms. I think that will give you a true picture of what you are earning as of now vs what you can earn in equity mutual funds which are managed by professionals.
We can have a detailed conversation around your situation and I can help you understand what re-shuffling can be done in your asset portfolio (with continuing rental+interest income) with greater capital appreciation, visit my website www.slwealthsolutions.com if you are interested

...Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1651 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 18, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 15, 2025Hindi
Relationship
I'm 34 and have spent the last six years trying to find a genuine partner through every possible route -- dating apps, matrimonial sites recommended by relatives, setups through friends. It's been exhausting and disheartening. The men I match with are either secretly married, emotionally unavailable, or bluntly state that they aren't interested in commitment. On matrimonial sites, I keep coming across entitled MCPs (male chauvinist pigs) who want a docile, obedient wife -- someone to bear their children, manage their homes, and take care of their aging parents like we are living in 1950. The few men I've genuinely connected with emotionally have told me upfront that they don't believe in marriage or aren't looking for anything serious. And here I am, still single. I've been seriously considering signing up for an app purely focused on intimacy. I'm not looking to sleep around without thought. What I crave is connection, touch, and feeling desired, even if it doesn't lead to marriage. I've dated so many men in search of love, and yet, I've ended up alone. Is it wrong to stop chasing 'the one' and instead focus on fulfilling my emotional and physical needs without expecting long-term commitment?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It's obvious to me that you haven't yet sat yourself down and asked:
- What do I want in my life partner?
- What do I want from a marriage?

You have shared about what others want from you; what do you want from a potential association?
Being clear will help you stop this chase and anyway, there's no 'The One'...if you find one, do let me know and I will be happy for you...Marriage is not about finding the right person but by knowing what you want from a marriage. This narrows down your choices to someone that close to your thoughts and value systems and then you both have to make the marriage work.

Now, if you are not looking for a committed association or a long-term one, then you will have to keep playing games with people who are half serious or just looking for some fun and hey, the chances of you being emotionally hurt will be greater here...
So, be clear on what you want and then you will know the next step, the next conversation that you wish to have with a person with more certainty that increases your chances at a good sturdy relationship.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

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