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Married for 5 Years but Feeling Lonely - Can I Bridge the Emotional Gap?

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |438 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 14, 2024

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Dec 13, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

My partner and I have been married for 5 years. Lately, I’ve been feeling lonely in my marriage. My partner and I barely talk, and it feels like we’re just coexisting. How can I bring back the emotional connection and intimacy without making it seem like I’m blaming them for the distance?

Ans: Start by creating opportunities for meaningful interaction. Sometimes the daily routines and responsibilities can create emotional walls, so finding a calm and positive environment for conversation is key. You might begin by sharing your feelings in a way that emphasizes your own experience rather than pointing out what your partner might not be doing. For example, saying something like, "I've been feeling a little disconnected lately, and I miss the closeness we used to share," opens the door for dialogue without sounding accusatory.

Rekindling intimacy often starts with small, intentional efforts to reestablish connection. This might mean setting aside time for each other, even if it’s just a few minutes of uninterrupted conversation at the end of the day. Look for moments to express appreciation for your partner, as this can help rebuild emotional warmth and remind them of the value they bring to your life.

It’s also worth reflecting on whether external stresses might be contributing to the distance. If either of you has been overwhelmed by work, family, or personal challenges, addressing those together can foster a sense of partnership and mutual support. Similarly, revisiting shared memories or engaging in activities you used to enjoy together can help reignite the bond you once had.

Lastly, be patient and consistent. Emotional intimacy doesn’t always come back instantly, but with genuine effort, kindness, and an open heart, you can rebuild the connection over time. Consider it a journey you’re embarking on together, rather than something you need to fix alone. If you feel like external guidance might help, discussing this with a couples therapist could provide both of you with tools to strengthen your relationship in a supportive environment.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1394 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 12, 2021

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Relationship
Dear Anu, I am a 44-year-old married man. My wife and I had a love marriage. But just after the birth of our second child we started developing some smaller differences and issues. Nothing really major. However my wife started staying away from me physically. The intimacy and love in the relationship reduced and eventually stopped. Along the way I tried to go close to her but she wasn't interested. I tried a lot but it didn't help. We even tried to go to the counselor but she wasn't quite interested so we stopped midway. Now eight years have passed since we have had any physical closeness. We live like roommates just looking after the kids. However now my wife is making attempts to come close to me but somehow I don't feel anything for her and I am not co-operating. I feel like I just want to go away from everyone and start living independently. What is your advice? We have two daughters.
Ans: Dear N, What went through your wife’s mind at the time of the birth of your second child is something that needs to be addressed.

Maybe the work of bringing up two children exhausted her or there was a hormonal disturbance that made her lose interest. But let bygones be bygones.

Now that she is trying to get closer, maybe you can also try to see what the two of you can do to rebuild the closeness.

Rather than jump straight to sex, create closeness step by step.

Spend quality time together, watch movies, engage in a hobby together, cook together…the fondness and affection outside the bedroom might help breaking the ice and you start to at least engage in an affectionate manner towards one another.

It is easy to walk out of a marriage but do remember what the reason to walk out will be?

After a few years, it might not been worth it at all…Why not at least give the above suggestions a try?

Engage as friends with no expectations from one another and let the purpose be a happy engagement just like the one we have with out friends.

You also have two daughters who definitely want to be in a loving family; so give this a chance and see if it works out. You have nothing to lose but everything to gain.

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |438 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 26, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 25, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
Hi Mam, I am a 30 year old woman, married since 11 years. My husband is 36 years years old and have a normal intellectual relationship. The problem is since the past 2 years, we have had a very poor physical relationship. we have intercourse once in a month or 2 months (we indulge in foreplay weekly though) since my husband has been facing medical issues relating to the same and somewhat refrains visiting a doctor. He has even confessed to self consummate occasionally. We do not have a child and since many years we have been trying naturally and medically, but results have not come favorable. We have noticed that recently that our interests in each other has begun fading. My husband really loves me and takes care of me at the same time, I love him too, but things have not been very good of late. We both are very eager to start a family as well and plan to go for another medical attempt soon. Can you guide us how to get back to the healthy relationship we had?
Ans: I'm sorry to hear that you're going through a challenging time in your relationship. It's important to address both the physical and emotional aspects of your relationship to work towards a healthier and happier dynamic. Here are some steps you can consider:

Open Communication: Sit down with your husband and have an open and honest conversation about your feelings and concerns. Share your thoughts about the changes in your physical relationship, the impact it's having on your emotional connection, and your mutual desire to start a family.
Seek Professional Help: Since your husband is experiencing medical issues related to your physical relationship, it's crucial for him to consult a doctor. Encourage him to see a medical professional who specializes in sexual health. It's common for people to feel uncomfortable discussing such matters, but a doctor's guidance can help identify the underlying issues and recommend appropriate treatment.
Counseling or Therapy: Consider seeking couples therapy or counseling to address the emotional aspects of your relationship. A therapist can help both of you communicate more effectively, understand each other's needs, and work through any emotional barriers that might be affecting your intimacy.
Quality Time: Spend quality time together outside of your physical relationship. Engage in activities you both enjoy, communicate openly, and strengthen your emotional bond. This can help rekindle the connection you had before.
Support Each Other: Going through medical challenges and fertility issues can be emotionally draining. Support each other during this time by being patient, understanding, and showing empathy. Remember that you're a team, facing these challenges together.
Intimacy Beyond Sex: Explore ways to maintain intimacy that don't necessarily involve intercourse. Engage in activities that foster emotional closeness, like cuddling, holding hands, or having deep conversations.
Manage Stress: Fertility struggles and relationship issues can lead to increased stress. Find healthy ways to manage stress, such as exercise, meditation, or engaging in hobbies you enjoy.
Set Realistic Expectations: While it's natural to want to conceive and start a family, try not to let this desire put excessive pressure on your relationship. Setting realistic expectations and timelines can help alleviate some of the stress.
Rediscover Each Other: Take time to learn about each other anew. People change over time, so invest effort into discovering your partner's evolving interests, dreams, and aspirations.
Stay Positive: It's important to maintain a positive outlook. Focusing on the strengths of your relationship and the progress you make, both emotionally and physically, can make a significant difference.
Remember that relationships go through ups and downs, and it's not uncommon to face challenges. With open communication, patience, and a willingness to work together, you can navigate these difficulties and work towards reestablishing a healthy and fulfilling relationship. If needed, consider reaching out to professionals, such as therapists or doctors, to provide specialized guidance.

..Read more

Rishta

Rishta Guru  | Answer  |Ask -

Rishta Guru - Answered on Feb 01, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 01, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
We have been married for two years and in loving relationship before that for two years. My problem is that the love has changed. My husband is no longer the same kind of romantic person. He loves me, he says I love you but the romance is missing. We both work and when we reach home all kinds of practical talks only happens. He is thoughtful, shares the housework, looks after all my needs but I really miss the romantic part that was there earlier and sometimes it makes me irritated and rude. I have tried telling him but he says love changes with time, we are married now and responsible for ourselves. My sister thinks I am being silly but I don’t agree. Why should we have to give up romance? Isn’t it an important part of our life?
Ans: Hi. I understand your frustration. It's completely natural to miss the early stage of romantic intensity in a long-term relationship.

And you're right, romance is an important part of a healthy marriage. It's perfectly valid to want to reignite that spark.

Here are some steps you can take to help your husband understand your concerns:

Communicate effectively

Focus on feelings, not accusations: Instead of saying "You're not romantic anymore!", share how his lack of romantic gestures makes you feel -- unloved, unappreciated, disconnected, unhappy, lonely, ...

Use "I" statements: Express your desire for more romance using phrases like "I would really appreciate it if...." or "I miss when we used to...." so that he does not feel he has to defend himself.

Actively listen to his perspective: Try to understand why he sees things differently. Perhaps work stress is affecting him or he does not know how to express his love differently.

Choose the right time and place: Avoid bringing it up when you're both tired or stressed. Pick a calm moment for a sincere conversation.

Brainstorm together

Instead of demanding specific gestures, discuss what "romance" means to both of you and brainstorm different ways he can express his love that resonate with you.

Schedule "romance time"

Block out dedicated time for romantic activities, even if it's just 30 minutes a week. Take turns planning dates, trying new things or revisiting activities you enjoyed earlier.

Acknowledge his efforts

Appreciate his non-romantic actions that show he cares, like sharing housework. Let him know these actions contribute to your overall feeling of love and security.

Consider professional help

If communication becomes difficult or you struggle to find common ground, consider seeking couples therapy. A therapist can provide a safe space for you both to express your needs and work towards solutions.

You’d get professional help when you are unwell or to file your taxes for example. Why not try it here as well if needed?

Remember:

Love evolves: While the initial passion may change, a deep and meaningful love can grow stronger over time. Focus on nurturing that deeper connection alongside rekindling romantic gestures.

It's a two-way street: Be willing to put in effort as well. Show your appreciation for him, plan romantic gestures for him and be open to his ideas for expressing love.

Be patient: Rebuilding romance takes time and consistent effort. Celebrate small victories and focus on the progress you make together.

Your sister might not fully understand your perspective but your feelings are valid. Don't give up on the romance; instead, find new ways to keep it alive in your marriage.

All the best.

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1394 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 15, 2024Hindi
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My husband stopped being intimate with me after the birth of our second son. We have been married for 11 years but all we ever talk about is related to our children, their academics, and future. I have tried to speak to my husband about this but he feels everything is normal. We live in a 2BHK apartment in Pune. My mother-in-law visits us sometimes and she doesn't like me. But I am cordial with her. My husband never discusses his work or personal stuff with me. There is no love or intimacy between us. He takes care of all other needs of the house and my children. Is this normal? Am I worrying too much? Please help
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
You are right when you worry about the way things are between you and your husband. Obviously sexual intimacy is one of the pillars for a strong marriage (and not the only pillar). And you have noticed that this intimacy has stopped after the birth of your second child.
Now, one way of looking at it is that many couples get drained in responsibilities of raising babies and building the family and this means sex can be off the table for a long long time. Is this the same with the two of you as well?
OR
It can also be that many people use sex simply as means to have children (reproduce) and not as an activity to be indulged in other than for bringing children into the world. Is your husband one of those people?
OR
When you say there is no love and intimacy between the two of you, surely this could be another reason as both of you have not bothered to take out time for yourselves where you brought in the element of trust, care, affection, love...this is the basis for other forms of intimacy as well.
Work on this better...try and become each other's friend first...he need not just assume the role of a provider and take it on so seriously that he forgets that there is a wife that needs his care. At the same time, do not insist on sex till you also make an effort to bring him into a space where he sees you as his friend and starts to trust you...

What happens in the bedroom, starts first outside the bedroom with small gestures like laughing, watching movies together, cooking, holding hands...don't jump into sex instantly...wait...be patient...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1394 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 02, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 30, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
I am married from last 5 yrs and have baby of 4 months old. My husband is very nice, takes good care of us, helps me in household chores. But I feel the spark of our relationship missing. I don't feel connection after the birth of baby. This is not from his side..but I don't know what is lacking, why I am feeling this way. I haven't discussed this with him as I feel he will get hurt. We do talk daily about baby and his work, whenever he tried to talk about me, I subconsciously switch topic. I feel frustrated with myself.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
This isn't new to those couples who have just had a baby. Life changes a LOT once the baby arrives; everything starts to become about the baby. Your life revolves around the child and even routines start to sync with the baby.
The couple's primary role becomes one of mother and father and somewhere the role of wife and husband dulls away and before you know it can vanish causing small and big rifts within the marriage.
The key is to remember your roles as wife and husband and that in itself will keep the spark alive. Just because you have had the baby, does not mean you forget what it is to be with your husband/wife.

Firstly, try and see if you can get some help during the day so that household chores are taken care of and you have some time for yourself. Pamper yourself with whatever you want to; a cup of tea, reading a book, calling your friends over...if any female relative can actually baby-sit over the weekend for a few hours, then you and your husband can plan a small thing together. Now, it maybe difficult to choose the time as the baby is just 4 months old, but make do with whatever time that you have. Slowly, you will learn how to navigate things with the baby...it's a learning ground and nobody has prepared you for it BUT it gets better with time only because you get smarter at understanding how to utilize time better and make the most of it.
And whatever time that you spend, bring back the courtship days, your dating moments back and oh yes, choose your best dress/outfit...it makes a lot of difference to the mind and the way you see yourself. Be patient...it gets better...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7262 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 14, 2024Hindi
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Money
URGENT: I have taken huge loan of 15 Lac ( it started with Rs 10000 initially)but I don't have a job. I am adjusting and paying the interest and i am going on taking loans.. Don't know where it will end. Please help me? Now that I have more money than working in any company, People are giving more and more loan thinking I am well off. Sometimes I feel the only solution is Suicide!
Ans: I’m truly sorry to hear about the immense stress you're facing. It’s essential to know that this situation, though overwhelming, can be resolved with the right steps. Your life is precious, and there are people and strategies to help you regain control over your finances and emotional well-being.

Here’s a step-by-step approach to help you:

1. Immediate Steps to Address Emotional Distress
Reach Out to Trusted People: Speak to a close friend, family member, or counselor about how you’re feeling. Sharing your worries can help lighten the burden.

Professional Support: Consider consulting a psychologist or counselor to address feelings of despair. They can guide you in coping and finding hope.

Suicide Helplines: Helplines like AASRA are available 24/7 in India. They provide non-judgmental support and advice.

2. Stop Taking Additional Loans
Taking more loans will only worsen the debt cycle. Communicate with your lenders honestly and explain your current situation.

Avoid making further financial commitments until a proper repayment plan is in place.

3. Evaluate and Consolidate Existing Loans
Make a List of All Loans: Note down the principal, interest rates, and EMI for each loan.

Debt Consolidation: If possible, consolidate your loans into one with a lower interest rate. This will simplify repayments and reduce the interest burden.

Negotiate with Lenders: Speak to your lenders about restructuring your loans. Many financial institutions are willing to renegotiate terms if they see genuine repayment intent.

4. Cut Down on Unnecessary Expenses
Focus only on essential expenses like food, utilities, and basic needs.

Avoid luxury spending or non-essential purchases until you regain financial stability.

5. Seek Employment or Alternate Income
Explore freelance, part-time, or full-time opportunities that align with your skills.

Start small businesses or use your talents to generate income, even if it's modest initially.

6. Engage with a Certified Financial Planner
A Certified Financial Planner can help create a practical repayment plan and optimise your resources. They can also guide you on managing money better in the future.
7. Prioritise Loan Repayment
Begin repaying high-interest loans first to reduce the overall burden.

Use any additional income to make systematic repayments.

8. Build a Support System
Inform your close family or friends about your financial situation. Their understanding and support can help you through this tough time.

Avoid isolation. Regular interactions with loved ones can provide emotional strength.

Final Thoughts
This phase is challenging, but it’s not permanent. Every problem has a solution, and with the right support and plan, you can overcome this.

Your life and well-being are far more valuable than any financial stress. You are not alone, and help is available. Let’s take this one step at a time, and I assure you, there’s a brighter path ahead.

If you’d like, I can assist you further in creating a repayment strategy or exploring additional income options. Please let me know how I can help.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP

Chief Financial Planner

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7262 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 14, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 14, 2024Hindi
Money
Dear Mr. Ramalingam, I have been reading your column regularly and feel you are giving great advice. Would like your advice and help in seeing what would be my income going forward per month and will that be adequate and how to supplement it. I am aged 62 in kerala. My wife is 58 not working and unmarried daughter, independently earning, who we hope will get married this year. Savings: 1.2 cr in Fd’s in banks and Post office 66 lakhs in PPF (I have been extending it by 5 years each time) 14 lakhs in NPS 1 lakhs in EPF last employment was in Jun 2024 44 lakhs in shares (portfolio bought many years back based on friends recommendation but only few stocks are doing ok rest is just sitting there) 90 lakhs in Mutual funds with several mutual funds (all in growth plans) 86 lakhs at cost price for A flat where I am staying and empty plot (both fully paid for) Income currently is from: LIC Jeevan Suraksha Plan, receiving Rs. 7,021 per month till death LIC Pradhan Mantri Vaya Vandana Yojana -annual receipt of - Rs. 77,979 (till mar 2032) when I get lumpsum back of app Rs. 10 lakhs New Jeevan Shanti Plan – fully paid up but receipts to commence from Mar 2027 monthly Rs. 36,450.00/- till death of self and wife Interest income from few of the FD or break fd principal when required. Little income from dividends Expense: Tata ULIP 20 yr plan premium of 1 lakhs till last payment in 2026 (2 payments left), mature in 2027, current value is 57 lakhs. TATA AIA Fortune Guarantee Pension – annual payment of Rs. 3,06,000/ till last payment in 2026 (2 payments left). 1,07,000 per year from Apr 2028 for life of both of us and return of premium at end of both lives. Aditya Birla Guaranteed Milestone Plan –Paid Rs. 1,02,500 for 5 year last payment this year. Will receive Rs.8,94,000/ in Dec 2031 has life cover of Rs. 15 lakhs (Worst plan I was conned into taking) Family Health insurance of 8 lakhs cover plus a super top up floater of 5 lakhs, covering all 3 of us approximately 45,000 for both policies 12 year old car with 4,000 insurance policy Other expenses approximately 30,000 per month for food etc. Should I change any of my investment etc to get a better income to meet future needs Thanks
Ans: You have diligently built a robust and diversified portfolio. It includes fixed deposits, mutual funds, real estate, and insurance plans. You also have various annuity and pension products. Your current financial situation showcases foresight and discipline.

However, to ensure your monthly income meets your needs and grows with inflation, some restructuring is necessary. Let’s evaluate your assets and income streams in detail and suggest ways to optimise them.

Existing Income Sources and Expenses

Current Income

LIC Jeevan Suraksha Plan: Rs. 7,021 per month (lifetime income).

LIC Pradhan Mantri Vaya Vandana Yojana (PMVVY): Annual income of Rs. 77,979 till 2032.

New Jeevan Shanti Plan: Monthly income of Rs. 36,450 from 2027 (lifetime for self and wife).

Interest Income: From fixed deposits and dividends from shares.

Current Expenses

Household expenses: Rs. 30,000 per month.

Insurance premiums: Rs. 3,51,000 annually until 2026.

Health insurance: Rs. 45,000 per year.

Asset Analysis

Fixed Deposits

Current Value: Rs. 1.2 crore.

Analysis: While secure, FD returns are low and may not keep pace with inflation. Only retain a portion for emergencies.

Public Provident Fund (PPF)

Current Value: Rs. 66 lakh.

Analysis: PPF offers tax-free and risk-free returns. Continue extending it as a safe long-term investment.

National Pension Scheme (NPS)

Current Value: Rs. 14 lakh.

Analysis: NPS has market exposure, offering potential growth. Partial withdrawal for reinvestment can be considered post-retirement.

Employee Provident Fund (EPF)

Current Value: Rs. 1 lakh.

Analysis: Withdraw and reinvest for higher returns.

Shares Portfolio

Current Value: Rs. 44 lakh.

Analysis: A few stocks are performing, while others are stagnant. Retain fundamentally strong stocks. Sell non-performing ones and reinvest proceeds.

Mutual Funds

Current Value: Rs. 90 lakh.

Analysis: Growth plans are suitable for long-term wealth creation. However, evaluate and streamline the portfolio with the help of a Certified Financial Planner.

Real Estate

Flat: Rs. 86 lakh (self-occupied).

Plot: Value not mentioned.

Analysis: These assets provide stability but do not generate regular income. Retain them as non-liquid investments.

Insurance Plans

TATA ULIP: Current value of Rs. 57 lakh, matures in 2027.

Recommendation: Surrender post-2026 and reinvest in mutual funds for better returns.

TATA AIA Fortune Guarantee Pension: Annual payout of Rs. 1,07,000 from 2028.

Recommendation: Retain as a fixed income source.

Aditya Birla Guaranteed Milestone Plan: Payout of Rs. 8.94 lakh in 2031.

Recommendation: Retain until maturity. Avoid similar plans in future.

Recommendations to Enhance Income

1. Restructure Fixed Deposits

Retain Rs. 30 lakh as emergency funds in liquid FDs.

Reallocate Rs. 90 lakh into debt mutual funds for better post-tax returns. Choose funds with low risk and stable performance.

2. Optimise Shares Portfolio

Retain strong-performing stocks. These can provide growth over the long term.

Liquidate underperforming stocks and reinvest proceeds into equity mutual funds. Select funds aligned with your risk tolerance.

3. Streamline Mutual Funds Portfolio

Review your existing funds to avoid duplication and underperformance.

Retain well-performing funds and shift others to actively managed diversified funds.

Opt for regular funds through a Certified Financial Planner for professional advice and monitoring.

4. PPF and NPS

Continue extending PPF for tax-free returns.

Do not withdraw from NPS until it’s mandated. Allocate the lumpsum received wisely at maturity.

5. Insurance Plan Adjustments

Allow the TATA ULIP to mature and surrender it in 2027.

Retain the TATA AIA and Aditya Birla plans until maturity as fixed income sources.

Avoid high-premium insurance plans in future.

6. Increase Monthly Income

From 2027 onwards, New Jeevan Shanti and other payouts will provide substantial monthly income.

Until then, use dividends, interest from debt mutual funds, and systematic withdrawals from mutual funds for supplementary income.

7. Plan for Inflation

Maintain a mix of equity and debt investments to beat inflation.

Ensure equity exposure is at least 40% of your portfolio for long-term growth.

8. Health Insurance Adequacy

Current health insurance of Rs. 8 lakh with a Rs. 5 lakh super top-up is reasonable.

Review coverage every 2-3 years and increase if necessary.

Final Insights

Your financial portfolio is solid and well-diversified. With minor adjustments, it can provide inflation-adjusted income. Focus on reallocating underperforming assets and streamlining investments. Regular reviews will ensure your wealth grows while meeting your needs.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Archana

Archana Deshpande  |93 Answers  |Ask -

Image Coach, Soft Skills Trainer - Answered on Dec 13, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 11, 2024Hindi
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Career
I am 35, MBA from a reputed college. I recently took over as senior project manager in a software company. Over the last few months, I’ve been asked to lead more high-stakes presentations, but every time I step in front of a group of senior professionals, my nerves take over. I can’t seem to communicate my ideas clearly, and I end up rambling or losing the audience. It’s frustrating because I know the content is strong, but I can’t deliver it with the confidence it needs. I’m starting to feel like this could affect my career growth if I don’t improve. I want to know how to seem more confident and present my ideas with clarity.
Ans: Hi!!

I can understand what you are going through.
I have helped many a people to become better communicators, presenters and public speakers. I agree with you when you say .. that these skills will augur well for your career growth.
What I can say is this .. that it is a learnable skill. Practice and more practice is the only way ahead. You said your content is strong, that is 50% of the job done, so build up on this confidence and practice your delivery in front of the mirror or in front of encouraging family/friends.
The only way to gain confidence is to "JUST DO IT"....to calm your nerves- deep breathing techniques and visualizations techniques will be useful.
I can help you on this journey of being a person who delivers with panache!

There are books by Dale Carnegie on public speaking which can help you out. Also read about Abe Lincoln and his journey of becoming a great orator, it can maybe help you.

Remember, PRACTICE AND PRACTICE is the key to unlock your confidence and become the person who delvers with panache.

All the best!!

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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