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Ravi Mittal |600 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on May 30, 2024

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more

Question by Malathi on May 19, 2024Hindi

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Relationship

Hi sir Good morning my name is malathi my age is 41 I don't have job and don't have my husband i don't have kids only family but I never expected anyone anything in my life I don't know i should run my life

Ans: Dear Malathi,

I am sorry if you are hurting. I can only suggest that you start looking for a job. It might be hard but you will end up getting something. It can even be something small but it will keep you engaged. Life throws a lot of hardship on people and it isn't always fair. But that is how it is. You can't give up, can you? Please focus on yourself and try to keep busy. Make some friends. Spend time with your family. Things will be better soon.

Best Wishes.

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Anu Krishna |1617 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 06, 2020

Question by AK - Oct 06, 2020Hindi

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Dear Anu,I am 41 years old doing my own business since 14 years. I live with my parents and i am married. Blessed with two children. I am the sole bread winner. They all luv me very much. These days (year 2020) I feel stressed and lonely, bcos of financial problem in running my house and fulfilling my EMI and other loan commitments. My family knows my financial adjustments and commitments. I feel myself like a machine working non-stop to keep my family happy and fullfil their desires. I don’t feel happy going home after my work for the day. I feel like I don’t understand them or they don't understand me. I know they luv me so much and me too. I feel let down but actually they support me in all the way they can. What should I do?

Ans: Dear AK, sadly, most of our lives are lived doing things for others.

Initially seeing the happiness on the faces of our loved ones makes us believe that what we are doing is the right thing.

But if you work or so anything in life without taking into consideration your feelings or your what you value for yourself, it will slowly start to seep into your core and you either end up feeling stressed or anxious.

I do understand that your situation is one of financial challenges, you mist work and why not work and at least set sometime for yourself over the weekend to rejuvenate yourself?

This time is non-negotiable and it is to refresh yourself so you can go back on Monday with a newness.

Also, instead of working like a machine, why not think that you are working efficiently to slowly pay off EMIs and to be free of them.

Bring some harmony between work and life which is what I can offer as a suggestion to you.

Be happy and work not out of compulsion but passion!

R P Yadav | Answer |Ask -Follow

HR, Workspace Expert - Answered on Aug 14, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 13, 2023Hindi

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Hellow sir, Request you to please suggest and help? I am 39 yrs old male with no job in hand. I am not married as well. Actually my mom was detected with liver cirrhosis and was asked to have liver transplant on Septemeber 2022. After tht i was all after taking care of my mom and looking out for donors. I didnt hav anybody to take care of my mom, my sister is settled in USA and she was expecting. Hence she could nt help, but all the financal help was done by her. My mom underwent Liver Transplant in the month of May 2023 and now she is recovering. I am with her taking care of her. I hav Dad, bt he is also very old. I was before sept 2022 working in a Reputed hospital as deputy marketing manager. I have done my MBA marketing as well with a hotel management degree. I have a total of 11 years of experience with 8.26 lakhs per year package. I always felt in regards of my marriage i m unable to get a match coz i dont hav a suitable job with good package. At 39 i m unable to upgrade my skills coz of all my responsibilities. Maybe September i am thinking of looking out for a job, as my sister is going to return from US. I want to get married and lead a normal life. I also want to grow in life so that i can keep my family happy. I m afraid of being alone all my life, coz my parents in regards with dere health are not doing well. I also want grow in my career. Request you to please guide me what should i do in life ahead . I had no relatives support that is why i had to leave my job to take care of my Parents. At 39 i feel tht i m too old to get married as dere are very few proposals of my age and those which are dere are very much well settled in life and would epexct somone who is more sucessful than me.

Ans: Hi,
I can understand that you have got two issues primarily. First, you need to get a job and secondly is to get married along with taking care of your parents. You can look for jobs through job portals and look for match through various matrimony portals and marriage bureaus. If you do this consistently for a few months, you are bound to succeed.

Anu Krishna |1617 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 06, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 04, 2024Hindi

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Hi Anu... Am 39 and single woman with no income. Not working. Dependent on family. Did my MBA . I don't know what's happening in my life. Donno what to decide and how. Where to start. When to start. What to start. Should I 1st start earning or get married. I lost all my life bcz of my negligence and family issues. Never had a happy n peaceful day in my life. Something or other will be in family n life. Am not strong enough to take bold decisions. And lead my life independently. I want my family to be happy. My mom and dad's is love marriage but they didn't have a best life so even we children never had happy moments. But mentally very much attached to family. Can't live without them. What should I do? Am interested in marriage but alliance have huge demands and now am aged. People think am not good looking so I didn't get any proposal. I don't believe in love eventually I never supported love marriage of my friends and cousins. Ofcourse they are having best life. Now I feel alone.. I want to earn my bread. I want a family. I want to be married and enjoy family life too... Please help...

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Life and it's highs and lows are what makes us, breaks us and then makes us back again.
It is okay to be confused BUT it is not okay to wander about without making a decision which only leads to believe that life is hard.
What are the things that you have been wandering about?
- Marriage or being in a relationship
- Becoming financially independent
- Putting your degree to good use
- Stepping beyond home and family to create a life

Now, you have begun to think of it and maybe it frustrates you that it's too late. But better now than never...
Push your boundaries and first do something that can give you a WIN. That will boost you to take on challenges in every area of your life that you have possibly been avoiding.
No life or nothing is created or built without challenges.

The key question for you is: Have I been avoiding failure which is the reason for me to wander and not make a few decisions that would have helped me?
Start somewhere and a WIN in an area that you have control over, is what I suggest you start at...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Kanchan Rai |604 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 22, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 12, 2025Hindi

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I am 48 years old married and my wife daughter are staying away from 10+years in same city i am completely surviving on debt plus stuck to one job from last 14+ years no increment not a high paid job salary only 35,000 i have no goals nor i feel like achieving anything with no buddy friends really not able to understand my situation following same wfh routine no changes please guide

Ans: The first step towards change is acknowledging that even though you feel stuck, you are not powerless. Small shifts in your routine can create momentum. It could be as simple as stepping out for a walk, reconnecting with an old friend, learning a new skill, or exploring opportunities outside your current job. The goal is to break the monotony and introduce something new into your life.

Emotionally, you need to ask yourself what you truly want. Do you want to work on your marriage, or is it time to redefine what happiness looks like for you? Do you want to stay in your job, or is it time to take a risk for something better? It’s okay to not have all the answers right away, but avoiding these questions will only prolong the cycle.

Right now, your life is running on autopilot. The moment you decide to take control, even in the smallest way, things will start shifting. You don’t have to fix everything at once, but you do have to start somewhere. Your situation is not permanent, and neither is this feeling. The key is to take one step forward, no matter how small, and then another. Change will follow.

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