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Anu Krishna |1437 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 09, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more

Question by Baharul on Dec 01, 2024

Relationship

Hi ma'am!! I was in relationship and we did breakup almost 1.5 yrs ago..from then often she was threating me occasionally and it's now stand at extreme level..she is now threating my parents and come to my home and forced to marry her either she will destroy us....... ma'am I am a aspirants and I can't concentrate anymore, I feel very low...what should I do??

Ans: Dear Baharul,
In extreme cases where there is a threat to life and also mental harassment, the only way is to report it to the police. Maybe, if that's the case in your situation, you might want to think of that as an option.
Before that, is it possible to actually take to her in the presence of her parents and yours, and explain to her and her side of the family that things are over from you end? In the presence of her parents, things become transparent and also she will not have an opportunity to accuse you of anything. And oh, never meet her alone!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna |1437 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 25, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 09, 2023Hindi

Relationship

I have 28 + years of frustrated and abusive and absolutely unsatisfied marriage. It was arranged but involved bitterness from both sides. My father did my relationship because of temptation and so many false facts from the in -laws' side. I was not interested but due to family compulsions I couldn't resist. Somehow i feel sad that my father got trapped due to greed and always feel bad about him, my mother was illiterate and did not have much opinion on anything. It was full of falsehood and cheating. I am very simple and minimalist persons, just after marriage wife and inlaws started torturing me to breakaway from my parents, being alone son and with the help of sisters managed parents with lot of difficulties but thought time will heal. I was thinking of separation just after 6 months but somehow was in difficult shape, couldn't ask. Meanwhile Father in law died and i thought it's inhuman to give separation at this critical time and accepted my destiny, My wife was very clever and managed balanced relation till her brother and sister got settled and we decided to welcome kids and blessed with two sons but after all her responsibility over, she again showed same behavior rather more aggressive and color and i almost separated from parents. I am in Govt service and was threatened to file a false case, with all difficulties, managed with balancing, hiding something here and there. After the death of parents , things worsened and she is eying on all property of inheritance to be sold . I don't trust her at all , I want to give all to my sons and then quit. She always threatens , i want to be separated and live my old age peacefully alone without any property but all I want to give to my sons , not to her . Please suggest a way , I am afraid she can file a false domestic violence case or even to give me poison . I am very tense nowadays and my health is deteriorating.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Never live in fear because that can always be used by someone who is searching for an opportunity to meddle with your life.
Deal with this fear in two ways:
1. For fear of false case filing against you, kindly approach a lawyer who will guide you on how to protect your assets
2. For fear of the way your life is moving about in an unsettling manner, do work on it rather than fear it
- Separation or not, will have to be decided by you and your wife and make it as amicable as possible...
- If there are chances of reconciliation, do lay down some ground rules for both of you which includes deeper level of communication, deeper listening, trust building...

Most relationships sour over a period of time, because 'taking for granted' seeps in, there are unrealistic expectations for one another, children become an excuse for not spending enough time each other, family members somehow get into the equation which allows little room for the couple to understand one another...
the list goes on...
It simply means: Marriage is something that needs constant working on...it requires time, energy and effort...

All the best!

Anu Krishna |1437 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 15, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jul 10, 2024Hindi

Relationship

Hi mam, I was in a relationship with a guy for 3 months he was uneducated but I’m a S.E. Initially everything was fine but later he started like u should not talk with other boys you should not go there you should not wear this kind of dress, I’m your husband so you should listen to me whatever I say u should do that like he started. Then he started mentally abused with so many bad words nd he slapped me twice. So I decided I don’t want to be in this relationship so I said him. Then he kept some fellows to follow me to check wat I’m doing where I’m going to get all these details. And then he said I will show both of our to your family, I will kill you like this he started. Now it is almost 2 year I’m leading my life but sometimes he will call me he will threaten me I don’t know what to do how to overcome this I can’t tell to my family I’m depressed can u please tell me what I have to do

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Are you married? Because he said that he is your husband...I am confused...

Anyway, NO, he has no business controlling you this way...Emotional and Physical Abuse is a strict NO NO...
Tell your family and do that NOW!!!!!!!
This man seems to be acting in a violent manner and your safety should be more of a concern...it was 2 slaps, then after that? When you did not protest for that, he simply has got the message that violence is okay with you...
No, it's not okay, right? And that's why you wrote on this platform...

Do the right thing for yourself...Protect yourself from this person first! Threats of killing you did not set off alarm bells? Why are you still letting him off so easy? This is NOT love...he is just a familiar person to you.
Familiarity does not mean Safety!!!!!! (Read this again)...

Involve your family and let him know that you are not alone; he will stop his threats knowing that you will respond to the rubbish he is subjecting you to! Speak with your family...

All the best!
Dear Anonymous,
No, Age is not so important in a marriage; but if it isn't, then why did you hide the fact of your real age? You have givem it that importance enough to hide it, yeah?
And any relationship based on lies or a hidden fact can cause damages...
The only way that I can see is work with the Counselor and appeal to your husband as well. Tell him that your child needs the love of both parents. Hear what he has to say...and yes, he is bound to bring up the age factor over and over again...it is something that he feels cheated with...so, respect it...Like I said, Apologize like you really mean it...

And oh, why are you so bothered about how he will treat other women in his life? Just focus on your life and your marriage...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Milind Vadjikar |865 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Question by Vipin - Jan 03, 2025Hindi

Money

I have a PF account pre-UAN and the transfer to the current account with UAN needs either the previous employer to approve or the current employer can approve. In my case the previous company closed its operations in India and have no one here, and I do not have a present employment too. So what's the remedy for me to claim my earlier PF?

Ans: Hello;

Your case is peculiar therefore I recommend you to personally visit the EPFO office where your old EPF account is held and talk to the officials about your situation.

They may offer you a solution for sure, else you may raise a grievance in EPFiGMS portal regarding your concern.

Best wishes;

Milind Vadjikar |865 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Question by Rakesh - Jan 16, 2025Hindi

Money

What is the best plan for investing Rs 40 lakh for regular post retirement income.

Ans: Hello;

A mix of POMIS(15 L; jointly) and SCSS(25 L) would be good.

If quarterly interest payments of SCSS is an issue then an FD with a Govt bank or a very big private bank paying monthly interest is also okay.

Immediate annuity from a life insurance company could also be a decent option because it provides regular income for longer periods with option of joint(both husband and wife) annuity for life with return of purchase price to the nominee, after them.

Best wishes;

Milind Vadjikar |865 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 16, 2025Hindi

Money

Hello Advait, hope you are doing well. Can we invest now in relaxo at 577 level.

Ans: Hello;

Outlook for Relaxo in the short to medium term looks muted due to intense competition from the unorganised sector hence pressure on sales as well as margins.

Therefore my view would be to explore better options.

Alternatively you may also seek a advice on this stock from a sebi registered research analyst.

Happy Investing;

Ravi Mittal |505 Answers |Ask -Follow

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 16, 2025Hindi

Relationship

I am 31 years old and have been married for 6 years. My relatives keep pressuring me and scaring me, saying that I haven’t had a child yet and that I should have one now. However, we are not financially prepared at the moment. We have just bought a house, and the loans have recently started, which exhausted all our savings for the down payment. My husband’s family had a very weak financial background. They had nothing, and he struggled a lot, even living in someone else’s house to complete his education. Only he knows how hard it was. Now, his salary has improved, and I am also employed. Additionally, we are entirely responsible for my in-laws, as my husband’s elder brother neither got married nor provides any support for the parents. We are under a lot of pressure right now, but everyone just keeps asking us when we are going to have a child. I’ve seen how my husband struggled with limited finances when the family was financially weak, and I don’t want to show such hardships to our children. On top of that, I am overweight and focused on losing weight to ensure I can be healthy. I feel very stressed and confused, but my husband is fully supportive of me.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
First of all, I am really glad that you are being so responsible and practical, rather than making such life-changing decisions based on emotions alone. Second, don't worry about other's opinions; they might have your best interest at heart, but this should be solely your decision. You should have a child only when you are ready to have one- both mentally, physically, and financially. And no hard and fast rule says you should have a child within a certain year of your marriage. Two people in a marriage is a whole family too; a child can add to the joy if that is what you want. But if not, your family is still complete. Please remember that.

Take care of your health and your mind. If you are worried about your age, you can always go see a doctor and see how many years you can delay this. Rushing is never a good idea.

Best Wishes.

Milind Vadjikar |865 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Question by Baldev - Jan 16, 2025Hindi

Money

Sir I have Jeeva saral policy which is about to nearing its maturity in July 2025. I paid it's premium regularly by quarterly mode of payment from last 16 years. How much benefit l will get.

Ans: Hello;

You may expect a XIRR of 5.5-6% or even lower on premiums invested in this policy.

If you get better then this it would be great.

Best wishes;

Samraat Jadhav |2170 Answers |Ask -Follow

Stock Market Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Question by Rajesh - Dec 19, 2024Hindi

Money

hi can i invest 5 lakhs in IRFC @ current price and leave it to grow for next 5 to 6 years. Will this fetch me atleast 5X retruns. is the stock fundamentally stable and potential?

Ans: 5x expectation is too much, please be reasonable. Its trading at high PE now and future growth could be impacted on lot of parameters. If you are expecting anything between 8-12% yearly, then its reasonable.

Radheshyam Zanwar |1144 Answers |Ask -Follow

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 16, 2025Hindi

Career

I'm a bsc botany graduate and now got admission and doing msc. I'm in first year and just gave my 1st semester exam but somehow now i feel i can't do botany at all its not just in my interest. I can't continue further with it as i dont think there's much scope too. I have interest in fields like geography or law related subjects. I'll be attempting for upsc too this year and also had a second thought to go for Law. Should i drop the msc? ....I've cried a lot thinking about that and its affecting my mental health too.

Ans: Hello dear.
First I would like to suggest that, in any way, you first complete your M.Sc. (Botnay) either with interest or without interest. Who told you that there is less scope in Botany? There are a lot of career options after M.Sc. (Botany).It is good that you are interested in geography and are attempting UPSC this year. Dear, along with your M.Sc. you can easily appear for UPSC and do the study of Geography, after completing your M.Sc. you can take the admission to Law course. Many people do the law even after their retirement or in due course of their service. There is no need to cry about the things which happened to you.
Suggestions: (1) Completer M.Sc. (Botany) by any means (2) Space-time to read Geography and UPSC Syllabus (3) Develop your overall personality and try to engage in some extracurricular activities of your interest.
Best of luck for your upcoming bright future.

If satisfied, please like and follow me.
If dissatisfied with the reply, please ask again without hesitation.
Thanks.

Radheshyam

Milind Vadjikar |865 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Question by arpit - Jan 14, 2025Hindi

Money

Hi, I am a new investor 41 yrs old, so far10L invested in various MF categories. Here are list of investments through SIP’sand lumpsum: 20K in Nippon Large Cap, 15K in Quant Mid cap 15K in ICICI Pru multi asset 15K in Parag Parekh flexi cap 15K in Edleweiss small cap 1L lumpsum in Motilal Oswal mid small Healthcare index fund 2L lumpsum in ICICI Pru all season bond fund 12.5K/month in PPF Can I achieve my retirement goals, both child education (9 yrs old & 5 months old), marriage etc. and is there a need to balance my portfolio. Also is there any need me to consider in other investments options.

Ans: Hello;

Your current lumpsum and monthly investment into mutual funds may be adequate to meet the education and marriage requirement of your kids. (~2 Cr)

Apart from that it may provide a retirement corpus (~5 Cr).

If you have a female kid invest in SSY(12.5 K per month) since the interest is more then PPF and other benefits are similar only with different withdrawal stage.

Also you may supplement your retirement planning through NPS (~20 K per month).

Review performance of your funds annually with reference to the category average and benchmark.

Happy Investing;
X: @mars_invest

Milind Vadjikar |865 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 11, 2025Hindi

Money

I am 48 , Income: Take home 2.5 L / pm , PPF amount 47 L , NPS - 20 L , FD- 37 L , Life Insurance - 80 L, Expenses 75 k /pm . Please advice me a plan for 2 L income / pm from 2036.

Ans: Hello;

You may need a corpus of 6 Cr to generate a post-tax monthly income of 2 L+. (Assuming 6% annuity rate and 30% tax)

Assuming your existing investment stay and continue till 2035(PPF, NPS, FD) it may grow into a cumulative corpus of 2.93 Cr.(12.5 K pm into PPF+47 L @ 6.9%, 20 K pm into NPS+20 L @ 8%, FD of 37 L @ 7.4%)

So you need to fill the gap of (6-2.93=3.07 Cr) through monthly sip.

You may begin with a monthly sip of 1 L into a combination of pure equity mutual funds and step it up each year by a minimum of 3% to reach your target in 11 years.

Here the assumption is that you have term life insurance of 80 L with no maturity value.

If it's an endowment policy then assuming maturity value of 80 L you may attain your target with a flat monthly sip of 83 K into a combination of pure equity mutual funds.

Make sure to move your gains from equity funds into liquid funds as you approach closer to your retirement to avoid it getting affected by market volatility.

Happy Investing;
X: @mars_invest

Prof Suvasish Mukhopadhyay |298 Answers |Ask -Follow

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jan 16, 2025

Question by vikas - Jan 15, 2025Hindi

Career

Hello sir I am working in psb as an officer and want to switch but too confuse...

Ans: First tell me why you want to switch over to other organization? Then I can guide you. Best of luck. Just follow me. May God Bless You. Professor.....................................:)

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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