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Ragging in Engineering Colleges: How Can I Help My Daughter?

Anu Krishna |1787 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 18, 2025

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 18, 2025Hindi

Relationship

The KIIT student suicide case is very unfortunate. Recently in Kerala a boy was ragged to death. These incidents are very scary. My daughter is a second year engineering student and she has often complained that it is common for senior students to rag or bully juniors and freshers to do uncomfortable things. When I told my daughter I could intervene she said it wasn't necessary as it would affect the arrangement at her hostel. I don't understand how we can help as parents. We live in Pune, my daughter studies in Bengaluru.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
What happened at KIIT is really sad. Obviously, it should have never happened in the first place.
Bullying and ragging is a punishable offense but who ever thought of an offense before committing one? In my opinion, stay close in terms of emotional support to your daughter. Let her know that she can come to you when things get rough. Also, if there's a counseling cell at her Institute, it maybe good for you to understand how it works, so that there is a place that can become her Go To in case the need arises. If your daughter says that intervention is not required at this point, then take her word for it. Be in constant touch with her, so that there's always a comfort feel that she has.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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my 18yrs old daughter is pursuing 2nd year Architecture from Pune living in hostel and has selected on her own to live the home town and get admission in college in pune. But now she is finding very difficult to complete the studies and we here are very much disturbed. often she says I want to leave the college and getting fail in some of the subject but still is doinghard work but due to college being strict also she is scolded number of times which is not able to handle. Please guide what to do

Ans: Dear Vaishali,
If she is genuinely unable to manage, there is not much that you can do. You may want to go live with her for a few weeks to help her get to a better mind space but this is not a permanent solution.
Do fond out from her if she is trying to run away as she finds the course hard or is it that she simply misses home. Both cases will lead to academic pressures. Try speaking to the faculty at the college and taking advice from the counselor there as well. It will give you an idea as to what is exactly going on and how as parents you can step in and help.

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My Daughter doing MBBS and passed First Year, but suddenly we came to know that she has relationship with another NEET aspirant who failed NEET twice, now she wanted to left MBBS and again wanted to give NEET for Government college or better college. But we know that some one including NEET aspirant is misguiding her. Her mind was controlled by that person, after lots of pursual we as parent failed and she threatened us for unwanted results. We already spends Rs 40 Lacs for her Two years fees but failed to pursue her for continue study in MMBS. We are in tremendous pressure, Kindly help and suggest. That persons Parents also involved in misguiding her. All these we came to know after two years of relationship.

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Asked by Anonymous - May 06, 2024Hindi

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I am writing to express my concerns about my daughter, who is 10 years old. Over the past six months, she has been experiencing difficulties at school due to bullying from one of her classmates. This classmate has been isolating her from her other friends and has been making her feel uncomfortable. Consequently, her grades have started to decline, and she has been expressing a reluctance to attend school. My daughter has confided in me about this issue, and she is desperate to distance herself from this classmate. However, she is feeling scared and lacks the confidence to do so. Additionally, I have observed changes in her behavior at home. She has become more irritable, moody, and adamant. I believe this may be due to feelings of being neglected in comparison to her younger brother, who is three years old. While she loves her brother dearly, she sometimes feels that I give him more attention due to his age. As a parent, I am trying my best to support and reassure her, but I feel that I may not be providing enough help. I am seeking your guidance and assistance in addressing these issues and helping my daughter navigate through this challenging time.

Ans: Bullying in the school has to be taken seriously by the school and parents. I am glad that you are trying to provide her with strength to deal with this. Try to understand about the other child who is doing that,if possible take the help of teachers,peers and counselors in the school to counsel the child . Meanwhile try to help your child to develop self confidence and deal with this confidently. Make your child have strong self belief to have a better self esteem.

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Hello sir Now My son is studying 9th standard and he is behaving aggressively to parents Kindly help me in this regard

Ans: Aggressive behaviour is a way child like to make a communication with you in his own way. Talk to him, when he is good and understand what is bothering him. Also since he is a teenager,develop a more friendly bond with him.

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As a concerned parent, I am deeply troubled by the recent tragic incident involving a Nepali student at KIIT. Given the reports of unrest and safety concerns, what can we as parents do to ensure the well-being of our children who study in other states? How can parents be assured that such incidents will be prevented in the future?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It has been a very disturbing incident indeed and as parents it can set off a string of thoughts on children's safety.
As parents what can be done is:
1. Reassure your child that whatever the situation, you are there for them! Just knowing this can ease them in terms of having an open channel of communication with you.
2. Also, being in touch with them not just out of worry BUT to genuinely inspire them can keep them in a motivated space.
3. A semblance of a schedule of visits from either side will ensure that they are always connected with family
4. Encouraging them to pursue cultural events/sports will give them a chance at being in larger groups so they never feel lonely or can't be singled out
5. If your child is someone who is quieter and prefers to be by themselves most times, have regular conversations with them.

There's only so much that you can do as a parent; but I firmly believe and have seen in my experiences while working with youngsters: The ones who have strong family support usually seem to most likely struggle less through these unknown challenges.
And one more thing: Tell them as often as you can: You are loved!

All the best!
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Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Hello Mihir, I had transferred my flat (owned by me and my spouse) as gift to my daughter when she was 17yo. This was done by a lawyer with payment of relevant stamp duty/taxes to registration office. I have below queries: 1) Do I need to take up any other documentation once she turns 18? 2) can I sell the flat, will there be any implications? 3) Do I or my daughter need to pay LTCG after the sale and if yes how much %? The flat was purchased in 2008 at 33 Lakhs and the ongoing rate is around 1.2Cr. I plan to purchase another residential property in India as well as overseas after the sale materializes

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Sir My son has completed his B.Com Honours from SASTRA during the year 2025. He is interested in pursuing MA from Madras School of Economics in this year 2026. He is currently enrolled in the Executive course of Company Secretary from ICSI. I wanted to know whether pursuing the course in Madras School of Economics is worthwhile and also the likelihood of getting good placements after successful completion of the course. Please provide your advice and suggestions which would help me in taking a decision. Thanks and Regards V NARASIMHAN

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