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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |169 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 03, 2023

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Sumeet Question by Sumeet on Mar 03, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

Hello mam, I have been married since 2011 and have one 9 yrs old child, but after the birth of our child my wife had stopped taking care of her looks. Even though we are of the same age, she looks much more aged than me and less interested in physical relationship. Whenever I start discussing about this with her, she starts arguing and gets upset. We are in our late 30s. Can you please suggest a way out of this please.

Ans: Sumeet,

It sounds like you are facing some serious concerns in your relationship, and I can understand how that might be difficult and frustrating. However, it's important to approach these issues with empathy, sensitivity, and mutual respect.

It's possible that your wife is dealing with her own struggles that are affecting her ability to prioritize her appearance and engage in physical intimacy. It's important to approach these concerns with an open mind and to try to understand her perspective. Rather than focusing on the external appearance of your wife, it might be more helpful to try and understand what is going on internally.

It's important to communicate openly and honestly with your wife about your concerns, but it's equally important to listen to her and respect her feelings. If she is not interested in discussing these issues or feels uncomfortable with the topic, it's important to honor her wishes and give her the space she needs.

If you are feeling disconnected from your wife and are concerned about the lack of physical intimacy in your relationship, it might be helpful to seek the guidance of a professional counselor or therapist. They can provide a safe and supportive space for both of you to explore your concerns and work towards solutions that honor both of your needs and boundaries.

Overall, the key to addressing these issues is to approach them with empathy, communication, and mutual respect. With time, patience, and effort, you may be able to find a path forward that strengthens your relationship and honors both of your needs.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |825 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 19, 2023

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Relationship
I'm 60 yrs old & my wife is 54 years old. We are married for 33 years now and have 2 grown-up children. My wife was always having less interest towards the physical relationship. She had lost further interest since last 10 years and totally stopped since last 6 years. She sleeps in a sperate room to avoid any physical relationship. She always says we are too old for physical relationship and let is not do any such thing now. I feel an urge to have a physical relationship atleast one a week and because of no relationship, I feel irritated and this is also effecting our general relationship. Unfortunately she is not understanding this. Please suggest what to do???
Ans: Dear Sunjay,
Many of my responses in similar questions like yours have been:
1. Either your wife is in her menopause phase or has menopaused and this can cause lack of interest in sex due to hormonal changes
OR
2. It's a belief system that once you have children, sex if off the table
If it's 1, then there's a lot more empathy that you can show as a husband and possibly explore options with a doctor who can guide the two of you on sex after menopause
If it's 2, then there's a task you are up against where you need to understand where this belief system set inside of her and what it might take for her to break it

So, irritation from you may not solve your problem but only aggravate it, but if you put your mind into finding a solution, you will be interested in finding the source of the problem and eliminate that.

All the best!
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |939 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 29, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 27, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hello Sir, I am looking at imvesting around Rs.20,000 per month in SIP with good returns and overall balanced portfolio along with some us stock exposure (Parag Parikh kind of funds). Please provide your valuable suggest in which mutual funds should I invest or is ETF better option
Ans: When considering your investment strategy, actively managed funds can offer distinct advantages over ETFs. Actively managed funds are overseen by professional fund managers who actively research and select investments they believe will outperform the market. This active management can potentially lead to higher returns compared to passively managed ETFs.

Furthermore, actively managed funds have the flexibility to adapt to changing market conditions and exploit emerging opportunities. Fund managers can adjust their portfolios in response to market trends, economic indicators, and company-specific developments, aiming to optimize returns while managing risk.

On the other hand, ETFs, while offering low expense ratios and broad market exposure, often deliver only mediocre returns. Since they passively track an index, ETFs are unable to take advantage of market inefficiencies or capitalize on undervalued securities in the same way actively managed funds can.

Considering your desire for balanced returns and exposure to US stocks akin to Parag Parikh-like funds, actively managed funds offer a more suitable option. They provide the potential for superior performance while aligning with your investment objectives and preferences. Working with a Certified Financial Planner can help you identify the most appropriate actively managed funds to include in your portfolio.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |939 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 29, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 28, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hello, I am 25 years old. Due to personal reasons I invest in only 100% equity mutual funds that do not invest in banking stocks. Currently I am investing in 3 mutual funds: Nippon India Power & Infra direct growth, Taurus Ethical fund and Tata Ethical fund. I have set Tata ethical fund aside as a retirement fund. Can you suggest where can I invest more (sectoral mfs or gold etf etc.)to correctly diversify my portfolio.
Ans: Given your current allocation to 100% equity mutual funds without exposure to banking stocks, let's explore other avenues for diversification while respecting your investment preferences.

One option is to consider adding a component of debt instruments to your portfolio. Debt mutual funds can provide stability and income generation, complementing the growth-oriented equity funds you're already invested in. Look for funds with high-quality debt securities and a track record of consistent returns.

Another avenue to explore is allocating a portion of your portfolio to gold. Gold ETFs or sovereign gold bonds can act as a hedge against inflation and currency fluctuations, diversifying your portfolio and reducing overall risk.

Additionally, you might consider increasing your exposure to international equities. Investing in global markets can provide access to a broader range of opportunities and reduce reliance on any single market or economy.

Ultimately, the key is to maintain a balanced portfolio that aligns with your risk tolerance and long-term financial goals. Consulting with a Certified Financial Planner can help you navigate these options and tailor a diversified investment strategy that suits your needs.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |939 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 29, 2024

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Money
I have a lumpsum amount of 20lakh to invest but have no idea how to invest to get a steady monthly income.
Ans: It's understandable to feel uncertain about how to make your lump sum work for you. As a Certified Financial Planner, I'm here to help navigate this journey with you. Have you considered the power of diversification?

Diversification is like spreading your bets across multiple horses in a race rather than putting all your money on just one. In the investment world, it means allocating your funds across different types of assets like stocks, bonds, and maybe even commodities or real estate investment trusts (REITs). This way, if one asset underperforms, others may compensate, reducing overall risk.

Active funds are managed by professional fund managers who actively research and select investments they believe will outperform the market. This active management can potentially lead to higher returns compared to simply tracking an index.

Regular funds, accessed through a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD), provide a structured approach to investing. Your MFD can offer personalized advice and support, helping you navigate the complexities of the market and make informed decisions.

Ultimately, the goal is to create a portfolio that balances risk and reward, tailored to your unique circumstances and financial goals. Together with a Certified Financial Planner and your MFD, we can design a strategy that aims to provide you with a steady monthly income while safeguarding your financial future.
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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |939 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 29, 2024

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |939 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Apr 29, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 28, 2024Hindi
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Money
Hi, I'm an 18 year old male, recently turned on January of this year, the first thing I did was to open a bank account. I have saved around 1Lakh approx, to be specific 96-97K, from the past two and an half or so year. Currently I have no debt, I don't use credit card, currently no loan. I have a debit card which I use to purchase stuff, my spending is very frugale, except from needs. I have recently opened a demat account and invested around 26-27K in the Indian market, to get a gist of things actually work. I have divided the money into Index/ETF, mid cap and Large cap. Mostly the money is in Index. What should be my next steps to grow, and can you suggest me some demat accounts that are good to use, currently am using INDmoney. I also have plans to study abroad, especially do my bachelor's. I need an amout of around 40-45Lakhs, a safe side of 50Lakhs, if the duration of the study is 3-4years with 2 years extra of work visa what should I do to repay the loan and still have money to progress forward with my career.
Ans: Firstly, congratulations on taking proactive steps towards financial responsibility at such a young age. Your disciplined approach to saving and investing is truly commendable.

As you embark on your journey to grow your wealth and prepare for your studies abroad, it's crucial to strategize wisely. Have you considered the potential benefits of diversifying your investments through actively managed funds rather than relying solely on passive index funds? While index funds offer broad market exposure, active funds are managed by professionals who aim to outperform the market.

For your demat account, have you thought about seeking guidance from a Certified Financial Planner or a Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) to ensure that you are making well-informed investment decisions? Digital platforms are convenient, but the personalized advice and support from a certified professional can add immense value to your investment journey.

As for planning for your education abroad, have you contemplated exploring investment avenues beyond the stock market? Given the specific timeframe and financial goal, alongside potential currency fluctuations, it's crucial to explore a mix of investment options that align with your risk tolerance and time horizon.

Wishing you the very best as you navigate these financial decisions, and may your journey be filled with learning and growth.
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