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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |360 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 14, 2024

Ravi Mittal is an expert on dating and relationships.
He founded QuackQuack, an online dating platform, in 2010 with just two people. Today, it has over 20 million users in India.... more
Rutuja Question by Rutuja on Oct 10, 2024
Relationship

Hello, I m 21 female I m in a long distance relationship with 32 year male.this person was behind me and always asked me to give him a chance to prove his love for me. At that period i was afaird of relationships as I didn't have courage to go against wish of my parents as i know they wolud never agree for love marriage,so that is fir sure i'll do arrange Marriage. All these things have been explained by my side to this person.He gad feelings for me thats what he showed to me even I felt a connection towards him, so we decided let's not commit anything anout marraige as we both wee not sure about these thing. After some time i realised these person has already made his mind ki he'll date me and he wanted to have everything that an relationship has but he will not marry me.But i m completely in love with.Even i told him about it ki I can't share him n won't be able to see him.with someone else.i just can't imagine myself without him. I fought with him even begged and cried but he always defend his self sayi g i told already ki he loves me and will keep loving me but will not marry me . He vists me after 6-9 months interval every time he visuts me he needs to have physical relationship. I don't know whether I m right or wrong but i feel like I m being used by him. I tried several time to end this relationship but i end up chasing him.Plz help me,guide me

Ans: Dear Rutuja,
If you have the slightest feeling that he doesn't share the same feelings for you as you do for him, or that he has wrong intentions, you have every right to end the relationship. In fact, that would be the right thing to do. I understand that it is difficult to break up with someone you love, but does he love you? Don't you think you deserve someone who loves you and does not make you feel as if you are being used?

Have a clear conversation with him- address all your concerns. If he still maintains his stand of not getting married to you, then let him know that you are not on the same page as him. Remember, for a relationship to work, your future goals need to align.

Best Wishes.

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Hello Mam ! Mam I don’t know if I have right to ask you this cause Iam still 17 ! Mam Iam Seetha ..I have completed my inter 2nd year and I am preparing for Neet 2023 and Yes I am least confident about my first attempt so I’ll be preparing for Neet 2024 to ! There is a boy whom I know him since 5th class but we were close to each other from 9th class ….. but like a good friend and 4 months ago he proposed me and I slowly fell in love with him !!! He is a good guy he respects me a lot and he respects everyone …from past one month we were very close and we met several times ….. He is a guy who respects my time and his time he don’t have obsession like I have for him ….I always force him to stay or talk bit longer and he felt like I won’t respect his time and Said Iam a person who won’t understand his efforts he puts for us and he said 10 days ago that we should be away for a year so that concentrate on ourself and he said to that I should change to a mature person …and he blocked me everywhere but I refused but I done it I mean neither we talked or chatted with each other for 5 days but after few days I called him from other number and he know that and unblocked me so we spoke to each other ! He said that we should be apart for our self but then again he said we should have been friends only but whatever happened is happened now we can’t do anything he said ! I asked him that be true and if you want to ask for a break up you can buy he said no I want you and I don’t want to leave you … and yeah mam he never tried to be physical with me …only I was and for this he sayid that I never understand him and etc etc and said that I just loved him physically not truely and that broke my heart ! But I don’t know what I should do now ? He said this is test for us that will our love be the same for one year ? But then again few days ago We talked to each other and that to I started first …yesterday as a friend we were talking and he said he wrote a poem and I asked for whom u wrote this he said For my ex …he said that if she comes again then he will accept and I was really confused 😐…And we had a huge fight he felt bad and I too but lastly I said sorry and today he asked for a break up and I said I won’t repeat my behaviour gain and I asked for last chance so that I could change from childish behaviour to a mature girl as he likes … Now you please say me mam that what should be done ? Should I have to stay away from him temporarily until I get changed to a better person as he wants or should I break up with him since he said we should have been frnds only ! What should I do mam ? Kindly please reply me as fast as you could mam !!! 😕
Ans: Its important you focus on 2 things for now - (1) your self esteem and your confidence & (2) your education and career. Once you are financially independent is when you can think of a serious relationship - all the best.

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Milind

Milind Vadjikar  |446 Answers  |Ask -

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Oct 16, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Oct 15, 2024Hindi
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hello, please advise on plan of action age: 40 Corpus: 3cr ICICI aggressive hybrid fund - 93L Hdfc flexi cap fund - 93L Cash in 7% interest savings account - 14L Ncd's - 100L (monthly interest income 80k / maturity dec '25) Monthly expenses: around 1.5L (including health insurance premium) Current plan: 80k income from ncd's plus 70k withdrawal from savings account Please advise a plan post NCD maturity - shall this 1cr go into 40L savings account for 2+ years expenses and balance divided into the 2 mutual funds mentioned above - and 2 years post start a swp? Thank you!
Ans: Hello;

I would recommend you to move your current MF holdings into equity savings type mutual funds (low to moderate risk) for eg. ICICI Pru and Kotak equity savings funds.

Buy an immediate annuity for the 1 Cr received after NCD maturity. At 6% annuity rate you may expect a monthly payout of 50 K.

Top up the fund corpus, if required, so that it stays above 1 Cr in both funds at the start of swp.

Do a 3.5% SWP from both funds to get a monthly income of 30 K + 30 K= 60 K

Total monthly income will be 60+50= 110 K

Please find some resource to generate additional 40 K monthly income, in a relatively less risky manner, as desired.

I do not recommend SWP beyond 3% because with higher SWP rate you may eat into your corpus during market drawdowns.(3.5% in your case suggested as an exception).

NCDs are risky hence they are able to offer higher returns but we have seen what happened in DHFL crisis so avoid it at all costs, in future.

I could have recommended to do an immediate annuity for entire corpus of ~ 3 Cr and take 1.5 L annuity income(pre-tax) but time in retirement will be high(current age 40)and corpus in annuity will not have much scope for inflation hedging.

Wish I could offer you a better plan to meet your monthly income goal with current resources.

Best wishes;

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