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Anu Krishna |1563 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 25, 2023

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 25, 2023Hindi

Hello,this is about a very close relative who has suddenly found that her husband,a highly placed government official,has fallen for an attractive news reporter,and is bent upon marrying her at any cost. He confessed that he has not been doing a right thing but is feeling helpless in the matter. He is forcing her to sign for mutual divorce as well,but the wife has refused point blank. They have a kid,just 4 years old with a medical issue,and his care requires both the parents to be together.The lady doesn’t work and is totally dependent on her husband’s income and house. Kindly advise some remedial actions for the lady.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
If there is no scope for reconciliation, then legal recourse is the only way out.
Even if the husband wants divorce as mutual consent but the wife wants to contest it, she can...
Consult with a lawyer who will guide her about her rights and also on how to protect her interests and that of the child. Since she is not financially independent and the child also needs to be cared for, a lot can be done to ensure this through legal systems.

Having said this, do let her know that living in a loveless marriage isn't going to help her...she will have to endure more of his escapades that will drain her emotionally...never beg to be ion someone's life...It does not come with respect and it will be a strain to live through such relationships. It is difficult to process now, but in the long term, she will feel better about taking a stronger stance.

All the best!

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Anu Krishna |1563 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 12, 2022

Question by JG - Sep 12, 2022Hindi

Dear Anu MadamI have a brother, he is married, 38 years old and his is wife is 34.Since 2 and half years they do not have any physical relationship but they have a 3-year-old child.My brother is also suffering from depression and the cause is failing intimacy between his wife and him. He is not interested in her at all and now applied for divorce. But his wife for the sake of child wants to continue to remain married as child needs both parents for upbringing and refusing to give divorce. We also want to treat his depression for which he is not supportive. This is causing pain in the lives of all family members and his little child.Please suggest what we can do for the wellbeing of all.

Ans: Dear JG,

How can you help someone who possibly doesn’t even realise that he needs help and that he needs it NOW?

Your intent to see him and his family is noble and out of care and concern. But if he is unwilling to recognise (possibly his mental state) that he needs professional help and that it will ease his situation and save his marriage, what is it that you can do?

For the sake of his wife and child, kindly ask an authoritative yet caring elder in the family to drive some sense into him.

Untreated mental condition isn’t a joyful experience for him or those around him.

Also, take him out on long walks in Nature. Nature is known to be very soothing and healing. Maybe it might help calm his nerves and he might seek help.

All the best!

Relationship

Anu Krishna |1563 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 12, 2022

Question by JG - Sep 12, 2022Hindi

Ans: Dear JG,

How can you help someone who possibly doesn’t even realise that he needs help and that he needs it NOW?

For the sake of his wife and child, kindly ask an authoritative yet caring elder in the family to drive some sense into him.

Untreated mental condition isn’t a joyful experience for him or those around him.

Also, take him out on long walks in Nature. Nature is known to be very soothing and healing. Maybe it might help calm his nerves and he might seek help.

All the best!

Relationship

Anu Krishna |1563 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 12, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 08, 2024Hindi

Hi, my only son aged 27yrs is in relationship with a girl aged 22yrs and she kept him as guarantor in her home loan of 20 lacs and took personal loan of 5 lacs from my son (which he took from NBFC and gave it to her). This all done without informing any of us in our family. She is from other state and she donot have any family members except her single mom. We have undivided family with conservative mind set. Our family members are not willing to accept her in the family as she is taking undue advantage from my son and feels untrustworthy....We have clarified to my son that in such a scenario you have to choose her or us leaving behind everything including the ancestral property. His girlfriend is not accepting him this and told him that she will accept him only if our family members accepts her. This has chaos in our calm and cool nature of our home as our son is throwing the tantrums everyday and disturbing the mental peace of every member of our family. Please advice us what can be done in this scenario as none of our family members are willing to accept her and also not wanting to part away my only son. Thanking you

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Either your family sees her as someone who wants family approval and be happy with it OR you can doubt her as someone who has managed to cheat your son.
Which of it is true, only time will tell...Your son is blinded by love...how can you appeal to him? What can you say that will make him realize that he possibly can be cheated?
One way is to invite her to your home and ask her to come out clean about these money dealings and why your son chose to keep this information away from his family...If you are all convinced about her honesty, it will be easier to accept her into the family; otherwise there is a possibility that your son maybe able to see through her lies...
So, whether she is the right person for your son or not will be better known when you warmly invite her over and without any judgements give her a chance...making sense?

All the best!

Relationship

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