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Interfaith Love Marriage: Stuck Between Parents & Partner in India - What Should I Do?

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1350 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jun 21, 2024Hindi
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I fight in my house with my parents and brothers for them to accept for my inter religion love marriage...they are not accepting for it,they are trying to do marriage with other person for me,with lots of fights and talking they finally cancelled the marriage option with other person and gave me a time of 2yrs,that they will not get you any type matches,they won't distrub...after 2yrs if iam ready then only they will search for it..they clearly mentioned that if it be 2yrs or 10yrs...we won't accept that guy whom you have been in relationship...if you want to stay as single forever...we will leave you,as single...but we won't accept him,or we won't let u to marry him that guy... because ,they were bothering about society and caste,that he belongs to other religion... what should I want to do,I can't leave him,and I can't live without him... should I take 2yrs time,may there mind will change? Or what else I should do

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Well, as a grown-up and I assume that you are of a legal age to get married, it's purely the decision of the two people in question. But. of course, being part of a family system, it becomes a need to actually have their support as well, right? Then, work for it...You can possibly use part of the two years to work with your parents into understanding why you like this person and why you will be happy with him. It's a process, but if you want the support of your parents, then make that attempt.
Keep some sort of a deadline to this process else you will start to get frustrated it does not move in the direction that you want.

Will they change their mind? You will never know...But after that deadline, decide for yourself what you wish to do BUT it will all come at some cost/sacrifice. Make that attempt...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |423 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 21, 2024Hindi
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Hello ma'am I'm 29 year old independent girl. I and my boyfriend (14 years relationship) want to marry each other but my parents and the whole family not agreeing with us because of intercaste marriage. His family already convinced for us and they are willing to accept me without my parents permission but the boy denied to marry me without my parents blessings. He always saying that one day your parents will understand your feelings and they will agree but I tried to convince them from last 3 years but my parents are saying that they will not give their permission for intercaste marriage due to what people will say. I have 3 elder brother but no one wants that I can marry to my partner. He is independent business owner running his own store. my parents are saying that we will keep you at home for entire life but never agree for the love marriage like this. I don't understand what should I do and what not . I'm feeling very depressed and disturbed all the time . Please suggest me the best solution for this situation
Ans: Navigating intercaste marriage in Indian society can indeed be challenging, but it's important to remember that your happiness and well-being should be paramount. Here are some suggestions tailored to the context of Indian society and relationships Start by trying to understand the specific concerns your parents have about the intercaste marriage. Is it fear of societal judgment, concerns about cultural differences, or something else? Understanding their perspective can help you address their concerns more effectively.Consider involving a trusted family member or elder who can act as a mediator between you and your parents. Sometimes, having a respected third party intervene can help facilitate a more productive conversation and bridge the gap between generations. Seek support from within your community or cultural circle. Sometimes, hearing from others who have successfully navigated intercaste marriages can help reassure your parents that such unions can be successful and fulfilling.Take the opportunity to educate your parents about the changing dynamics of relationships and marriages in modern Indian society. Share stories and examples of intercaste marriages that have thrived, and emphasize that love knows no boundaries. Changing deeply ingrained beliefs and cultural norms takes time. Be patient with your parents and continue to express your love and commitment to your partner. Sometimes, repeated conversations and demonstrations of your sincerity can gradually soften their stance. Consider seeking the assistance of a relationship counselor or therapist who specializes in intercultural or intercaste relationships. They can provide you with personalized advice and strategies for navigating the complexities of your situation.While it's always preferable to have your parents' blessing, remember that ultimately, the decision to marry is yours. If all efforts to persuade your parents fail and you feel that marrying your partner is the right choice for you, consider exploring legal options such as court marriage. Take care of your mental and emotional well-being during this challenging time. Lean on your partner, friends, and support network for emotional support, and engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.
Remember, you deserve to be with someone who loves and respects you for who you are, regardless of societal expectations or family objections. Stay true to yourself and your values, and trust that with patience, understanding, and perseverance, you can overcome the obstacles in your path.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1350 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 01, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 20, 2024Hindi
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Madam i am 21 years old having a good post at central government as at erly age i got job and i joint it now i am 22 and having a boyfriend he is also central government officer and he is age 29 bu despite of the age gap the love bloomed and we are so in love with each other i told my family early tge condition and said that i want to marry him but my parents said after 25 we will ger u married but by sharing this at hone they are not having trust on mr and are being insecure and wants me to leave a government job and to come home because he is not from same caste and it will also be interstate marriage my family is having the fear of relatives and my mother us against of it they are saying intercaste marriage we will not support or accept continuously emotional blackmail to me trying to manipulate, brainwash me and abusing me emotionally verbally and physically. what should i do?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Inter-faith marriages are still a big NO NO in many homes and yours is not an exception. Like in many other cases, my suggestion has been that both sides must want to get to know the other person. Like your parents need to see a different side of your boyfriend to be willing to accept him.
What is it that he can bring in their daughter's life that will ease their concerns about his faith/religion?
So, your boyfriend must be willing to be patient and make efforts on his part to integrate into your family. It takes time, so be patient.
Now, for your job...do not confuse emotions and your job. Your parents feels that you might take drastic steps with your boyfriend and hence want you closer to home so that they can keep an eye on you. Address this concern by being mature and immersing yourself more into work that gives them the confidence that you are not about to do anything behind their back.
Addressing what bothers them is a better way out rather than trying to convince them...as the same issues will keep coming back if you force them to accept something. So, be patient and responsible for things to sort themselves out...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1350 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 26, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 22, 2024Hindi
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Hi, I love my parents a lot & the same way is for them, but in my family there are people who might say ill words against my father if he agreed to my decision, its really been 5 years I am trying to convince my father and even my grandfather also convinced him, but still my father is on the same point that I will not let this happen & if you want to do you go ahead but you will never come back here. I know the love and worry he have for me but there are many people ( one pandit) out of nowhere they are coming and askiing me to leave the guy and get marrieg in same caste. How the rules are changed if they know that my relationship is now 16 yrs & now I am making a tough decision of getting court marriage done. But suggest me will there be any tiny hope where I can still ask my father to be on my side. Apart from that he agreed for cousin marrigae in same cast but he will not attend that marrirage for mine atleast he can give me blessing. I was a good bacha for him which really made him hurt and he didnt expected this from me, tell me how can i make them agree
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
16 years is a long time and I am sure that you have thought this through...It's possible that your father may come around someday...for now, it's time for you to take a decision to live life and take charge. You cannot force him to agree to anything and maybe address what his worries. Some of it may make sense and some of it may seem unnecessary. But ultimately he is a parent and wishes you well.
Address his concerns and if he still does not want to look at things differently, you know what you can do...So, take charge...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

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Milind Vadjikar  |741 Answers  |Ask -

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Dec 03, 2024

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What happens when a Mutual Fund company shuts down / gets sold off?
Ans: Hello;

If a mutual fund company gets sold or fails, the process is prescribed by SEBI:

In case MF company is Sold,
The new fund house may:
1. Continue the scheme with a new name and management.

2. Merge the scheme with similar funds and offer investors the option to exit without any exit load.

In case MF company shuts down,
The fund house will:
1. Pay out investors based on the fund's last recorded Net Asset Value (NAV) and the number of units the investor holds, after deducting expenses.

2. If the company is not in a position to do so then SEBI may liquidate the funds assets and distribute the proceeds to unit holders.

It is also pertinent to note that mutual fund regulation in India is one of the most stringent and hence best, from investor's point of view, globally.

This is not just in theory. We have seen how the Franklin Templeton abrupt closure of debt funds was handled with surgical precision, by SEBI, with no loss to unitholders.


Skin in the game regulation mandates that 20% salary of key mutual fund personnel and fund managers is paid in terms of units of their funds with a 3 year lock-in.

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Registrar and Transfer Agents handle the investor registration,kyc, maintaining records, providing account and tax statements etc.

Happy Investing;
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