Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help

Interfaith Love Marriage: Stuck Between Parents & Partner in India - What Should I Do?

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1503 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 25, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jun 21, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship

I fight in my house with my parents and brothers for them to accept for my inter religion love marriage...they are not accepting for it,they are trying to do marriage with other person for me,with lots of fights and talking they finally cancelled the marriage option with other person and gave me a time of 2yrs,that they will not get you any type matches,they won't distrub...after 2yrs if iam ready then only they will search for it..they clearly mentioned that if it be 2yrs or 10yrs...we won't accept that guy whom you have been in relationship...if you want to stay as single forever...we will leave you,as single...but we won't accept him,or we won't let u to marry him that guy... because ,they were bothering about society and caste,that he belongs to other religion... what should I want to do,I can't leave him,and I can't live without him... should I take 2yrs time,may there mind will change? Or what else I should do

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Well, as a grown-up and I assume that you are of a legal age to get married, it's purely the decision of the two people in question. But. of course, being part of a family system, it becomes a need to actually have their support as well, right? Then, work for it...You can possibly use part of the two years to work with your parents into understanding why you like this person and why you will be happy with him. It's a process, but if you want the support of your parents, then make that attempt.
Keep some sort of a deadline to this process else you will start to get frustrated it does not move in the direction that you want.

Will they change their mind? You will never know...But after that deadline, decide for yourself what you wish to do BUT it will all come at some cost/sacrifice. Make that attempt...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |538 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 22, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 21, 2024Hindi
Listen
Relationship
Hello ma'am I'm 29 year old independent girl. I and my boyfriend (14 years relationship) want to marry each other but my parents and the whole family not agreeing with us because of intercaste marriage. His family already convinced for us and they are willing to accept me without my parents permission but the boy denied to marry me without my parents blessings. He always saying that one day your parents will understand your feelings and they will agree but I tried to convince them from last 3 years but my parents are saying that they will not give their permission for intercaste marriage due to what people will say. I have 3 elder brother but no one wants that I can marry to my partner. He is independent business owner running his own store. my parents are saying that we will keep you at home for entire life but never agree for the love marriage like this. I don't understand what should I do and what not . I'm feeling very depressed and disturbed all the time . Please suggest me the best solution for this situation
Ans: Navigating intercaste marriage in Indian society can indeed be challenging, but it's important to remember that your happiness and well-being should be paramount. Here are some suggestions tailored to the context of Indian society and relationships Start by trying to understand the specific concerns your parents have about the intercaste marriage. Is it fear of societal judgment, concerns about cultural differences, or something else? Understanding their perspective can help you address their concerns more effectively.Consider involving a trusted family member or elder who can act as a mediator between you and your parents. Sometimes, having a respected third party intervene can help facilitate a more productive conversation and bridge the gap between generations. Seek support from within your community or cultural circle. Sometimes, hearing from others who have successfully navigated intercaste marriages can help reassure your parents that such unions can be successful and fulfilling.Take the opportunity to educate your parents about the changing dynamics of relationships and marriages in modern Indian society. Share stories and examples of intercaste marriages that have thrived, and emphasize that love knows no boundaries. Changing deeply ingrained beliefs and cultural norms takes time. Be patient with your parents and continue to express your love and commitment to your partner. Sometimes, repeated conversations and demonstrations of your sincerity can gradually soften their stance. Consider seeking the assistance of a relationship counselor or therapist who specializes in intercultural or intercaste relationships. They can provide you with personalized advice and strategies for navigating the complexities of your situation.While it's always preferable to have your parents' blessing, remember that ultimately, the decision to marry is yours. If all efforts to persuade your parents fail and you feel that marrying your partner is the right choice for you, consider exploring legal options such as court marriage. Take care of your mental and emotional well-being during this challenging time. Lean on your partner, friends, and support network for emotional support, and engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.
Remember, you deserve to be with someone who loves and respects you for who you are, regardless of societal expectations or family objections. Stay true to yourself and your values, and trust that with patience, understanding, and perseverance, you can overcome the obstacles in your path.

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |538 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 19, 2025

Listen
Relationship
hi sir im in a relationship with a guy who i met in hyd we have been together since one year he is a hindu nd im a christian we both love eachother and wanna marry but my parents r against it bcoz he comes from a hindu family and they r forcing me to get married to a christian guy i love him i never got love from my parents when he is giving me the love i want my parents have seperated me from him im not able to understand what to do plz help
Ans: Dear Niveditha,
It’s important to start by having an open and honest conversation with your parents. Try to understand their concerns and share your feelings with them. Express how much this relationship means to you, focusing on the love, respect, and support you and your partner share, rather than just the religious differences.

If this approach doesn’t work, consider involving a trusted family member, friend, or community leader who might help mediate the situation. Sometimes, having an external perspective can help bridge the gap between differing viewpoints. You should also reflect on the long-term implications of your decision. Think about whether you’re ready to face the potential challenges of a mixed-religion marriage, including societal pressures and family dynamics. Having in-depth discussions with your partner about these issues is crucial to ensure you’re both on the same page.

If your parents remain opposed, you may need to consider seeking counseling or therapy. A counselor can help you process your emotions and provide strategies for dealing with family conflicts. They can also offer guidance on how to communicate more effectively with your parents. Building a support system outside of your family, whether through friends, mentors, or support groups, can also be invaluable during this time. It’s important to have people who understand and support your decisions.

Ultimately, the decision about whether to continue with your relationship despite your parents' opposition is yours. You’ll need to weigh the emotional and practical consequences, including the possibility of estrangement or ongoing family conflict. It’s vital to prioritize your happiness and well-being. If you believe that your relationship brings you genuine love and fulfillment, standing by your choice is valid. However, be prepared for the challenges that may come and have a plan in place to manage them. This is a deeply personal decision, and whatever path you choose should align with what feels right for you and your future.

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1503 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 20, 2025

Listen
Relationship
hi maam im in love with a guy who i met in hyd im 24 years nd he is 28 we both r in love with eachother and wanna marry eachother but the prblm is that i come from a christian family and he comes from a hindu family my mom is not ready to accept him just because he is a hindu and my family r forcing me to get married to a christian guy itself they r mentally forcing me everyday to leave him just because he is a hindu nd our caste is different my family seperated me from him and forcing me to get married to a guy of their choice and in my family there r 16 members who have had love marriages i took help of my relative who also had a love marriage to convince my parents and help us to get married but she is the one who add more fake rumors and more fuel about him that he is doing timepass even if they talk to him in calls they say that he is not lifting our calls at all i have all the recordings but still they r lying to me nd my mom saying that he is not ready to talk about her it became difficult for me to convince them my mom listen to my relatives as they say and so they do i dont have anyone to support me to get married to my bf plz help i wanna marry him only and i see future with him he is the only one who make me laugh play with me like how a dad plays with his daughter i havent got the love from my parents when im getting the love from him they seperated me from him and forcefully bought me to my native place nd not letting me meet or see him im depressed asking my parents to meet him but they r like no we dont like him my parents r not ready to understand and they r saying he is with u only for ur money he also told my relatives that i dont want money but still they r keeping on adding fuel and mentally harrasing me to get married to someone else they r forcefully trying to get me married to someone else i wanna marry him only what should i do plz help i love him so does he
Ans: Dear Niveditha,
What caught my eye was the fact that you seem to have found the love that parents give their children with this person. This is not healthy as you are searching for what you lack in someone else. Work on this...and if this is the reason that you actually are in love with this person, you really need to work it.
Now when it comes to your parents' acceptance, your partner has to put in efforts to win them over and on your part rather than playing this emotionally with them, make your parents see what you see in your partner in terms of traits, qualities etc...And the less you involve family members into this circus, the better. At times, people come to have their share of fun by making things worse...So, be wise about who you involve.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Latest Questions
Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |538 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 12, 2025

Listen
Relationship
Dear Kanchan .. Generally it happens to me, when I have to attend any hearing before courts/ Tribunal, I become more stressed till the hearing is completed. Please suggest
Ans: It’s entirely normal to feel stressed before court or tribunal hearings. These situations can be intimidating, and the anticipation of the unknown adds to the anxiety. But it’s crucial to manage this stress to ensure you perform at your best and protect your mental well-being.

Start by preparing thoroughly for the hearing. The more you know about the case, the arguments, and the possible questions, the more confident you’ll feel. Practice your statements or answers, perhaps with a colleague or in front of a mirror. Visualization can also be powerful—imagine yourself confidently presenting your case and everything going smoothly.

On the day of the hearing, use deep breathing techniques to calm your nerves. Inhale slowly through your nose, hold for a few seconds, and exhale through your mouth. Repeat this several times to reduce anxiety. Positive affirmations can also help. Remind yourself that you are well-prepared and capable of handling the situation.

If the stress is overwhelming, consider grounding exercises, such as focusing on your five senses—what you see, hear, feel, taste, and smell at the moment. This can help anchor you in the present and prevent your mind from spiraling into worst-case scenarios.

After the hearing, practice self-care. Engage in activities that help you relax, like a walk, listening to music, or talking to someone you trust. If this anxiety persists or intensifies, seeking support from a mental health professional can help you develop more personalized coping strategies.

I

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |538 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 12, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 08, 2025Hindi
Listen
Relationship
My boyfriend is of a complete different religion and caste as mine. We met at work. In my past i have had only one relationship in which i got cheated on....so was skeptical on dating again. Now its been 8 months in this new relationship where he convinced me to give a try. He's a gem of a person but now he is telling melive in the present i dont know about the future. I love you n want to date you but idk about the future if my family wants me with someone i may have to end this. What do i do i am so attached for he has given me all the love n care. Please help
Ans: Right now, you need to be honest with yourself about what you want. If you’re looking for a committed future and he’s unsure, it’s essential to recognize that this uncertainty may continue to cause you pain. If you choose to stay, prepare yourself for the possibility that his family might influence his decision, and it could end in heartbreak. On the other hand, if you feel that the love and care he’s giving you right now are worth the risk, then decide to cherish the present moment while being mentally prepared for whatever may come.

Have an open and heartfelt conversation with him. Let him know how his uncertainty makes you feel, without pressuring him for a commitment. This isn’t about forcing him to decide but about understanding each other’s emotional needs and boundaries. If he truly values the relationship, this conversation might give him a deeper perspective on how his indecision affects you.

It’s important to protect your emotional well-being. If his stance remains the same and you find yourself growing more anxious and hurt by the uncertainty, then you might have to consider whether staying is good for your mental and emotional health. Sometimes letting go, even when it hurts, is the most loving thing you can do for yourself.

...Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |538 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 12, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 12, 2025Hindi
Listen
Relationship
My wife 55 is unable to cope up with death of our elder son aged 27 around 2 yrs ago and is always in deep regress remorse uninterested in any daily chores including sex. I wish to move on .. Suggest way out...
Ans: Two years might seem like a long time, but grief doesn’t follow a timeline. For some, it can take much longer to even begin the process of healing, especially when it involves the loss of a child. It’s not unusual for grief to cause a complete shutdown, and that’s likely what’s happening with your wife. She’s stuck in a cycle of regret and remorse, unable to find a way out.

While you also carry the weight of this loss, your need to move forward is natural. It’s crucial to understand that wanting to heal and live again doesn’t mean you’re forgetting or dishonoring your son. It simply means you’re choosing life amidst the pain. The challenge is to find a way to do that without feeling guilty and without leaving your wife behind.

Encouraging her to seek professional help, such as grief counseling or therapy, could be a significant step. If she’s resistant, consider starting therapy for yourself first. Sometimes when one partner begins to heal, it opens the door for the other to consider healing too. Couples grief counseling could also provide a safe space for both of you to express your pain and find a way forward together.

Patience and understanding are crucial, but so is communication. Gently express to her how much you miss her presence and how you’re struggling too. Let her know you want to find a way to live again while still honoring your son’s memory.

Moving on doesn’t mean moving away from your son’s memory—it means learning to carry it in a way that doesn’t consume you. It’s a delicate balance, and seeking support can help you both find it.

...Read more

Yogendra

Yogendra Arora  |5 Answers  |Ask -

Tax Expert - Answered on Feb 12, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 11, 2025Hindi
Listen
Money
Hey, I am a freelance graphic designer based in Mumbai. I’m 40 and I've recently transitioned from a full-time job to freelancing, and I’m struggling to understand how to manage taxes on my variable income. My annual earnings are 8-15LPA approx. Are there any deductions specific to freelancers? Also, how should I plan for quarterly tax payments?
Ans: hi,
for this particular financial year you will be taxed under 2 heads ,1st under salaries for the period you were in job & for remaining part you will be taxed as business income being started freelancing work.

And for freelancers there is no any specific dedutions however all deductions available to all others are available to freelancers like 80C to 80G.

For calculation of taxation of freelancing period you should record all your receipts & expenses (only related to work, no any personal expenses) details with proper documentary evidences specially for expenses part, net of the (receipts & expenses) will be your income however you can opt for presumptive taxation also.

For Advance payment :-
if tax applicable to you during the finanical year as per calculations exceeds Rs 10000, then your have to pay advance tax quarterly as below
on or before 15th june :- minimum 15% or more of tax amount.
on or before 15th september :- minimum 45% or more of tax amount.
on or before 15th December :- minimum 75% or more of tax amount.
on or before 15th March :- full 100% tax payable as per calculations.
Happy to help.
Thanks.

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x