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Love Guru

Love Guru   |204 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 20, 2023

Love Guru has been answering relationship and romance related questions on Rediff.com for over 13 years. She won't mince words when telling you what the problem is and what you can do about it. If you want a fresh perspective from an unbiased, objective-thinking individual about your relationship woes, Love Guru could just be the person you need to need to hear from.... more
Diksha Question by Diksha on Apr 10, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

Mam, my boyfriend doesn't reply me, what should I do, we had a fight from last 2 days

Ans: Some people take time to get over their anger. Give him a cool-off period of a couple of days with no contact. Then you can always let him know that you’re not going to wait endlessly for him to descend from his ivory tower, and if he milks it too much you’ll just break things off permanently. And if that’s what he’s trying to do, the least he can do is tell you like a mature individual, not a brat who doesn’t reply.

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1604 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 19, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 19, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi ma'am, something happened between me and my boyfriend as usual fights. His parents misunderstood him and me as well that I've gotten sick due to our fights and that he left me halfway through my house, which he didn't. And due a lot more misunderstandings he's parents have developed bit of a rage against me and they are blackmailing him to not try to Contact or call me or else they'd end their lives and he is scared cause he is an only child. Even if he wishes and tries to reach me he cannot because of his parents. What can be done in this situation. Now i don't understand shall i wait for him to come back or just move on. Since we haven't met or spoken for the last time. I haven't heard anything from him and his parents are saying he doesn't want to talk to anyone.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Do not waste your time...his parents and then him; you will constantly be in a stressful spot convincing either one of them that you are the person. If your boyfriend also feels the same as you about the relationship, then he will do something to support you.
If he doesn't and all that is becoming your job, then seriously do not waste any more time on this. And if he really wanted, he would have found a way of reaching out to you.
The very fact that you haven't heard much from him is a huge red flag. Focus on yourself and better people who respect you and your love will come along...
(My suggestions are only under the assumption that you and your boyfriend are above the age of 18 and 21 respectively).

All the best!

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |595 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 29, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 22, 2024Hindi
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Hii mam, since i year i am in relationship with him but nowadays fighting are increased in between both of us so what we should do and we both are responsible for the fight cause we both over react for small things
Ans: It’s common for fights to increase in a relationship when emotions are high and both partners overreact to small issues. This pattern often stems from unresolved emotions, stress, or a lack of effective communication. The good news is that recognizing this dynamic means you're already taking the first step toward improvement.

Start by reflecting on the triggers for your arguments. Think about what situations or topics usually lead to conflicts and whether they arise from unmet needs, miscommunications, or external stressors. Understanding the root causes can help you both address the real issues rather than reacting to the surface level.

When emotions run high, it’s easy to say or do things in the heat of the moment that you later regret. To prevent this, both of you can practice pausing during disagreements. Agree on a signal or phrase to use when things start to escalate, giving each other space to cool down before continuing the conversation. This approach allows you to respond calmly rather than reacting impulsively.

Another important step is to focus on improving how you communicate. Instead of placing blame or using accusatory language, express your feelings using "I" statements. For example, say, "I feel hurt when this happens" instead of "You always do this." This small shift can reduce defensiveness and encourage understanding.

It’s also crucial to nurture the positive aspects of your relationship. Make time for activities that you both enjoy and that bring you closer, whether it’s a shared hobby, a walk, or simply having an uninterrupted conversation. These moments of connection can help balance out the tension from disagreements.

Finally, remember that resolving conflicts takes patience and teamwork. It’s not about determining who’s right or wrong but about finding solutions that work for both of you. If you feel stuck or find that the fights are becoming overwhelming, consider seeking guidance from a counselor or therapist. A neutral third party can help you both understand your patterns and develop healthier ways to handle conflicts, ensuring the relationship grows stronger.

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |590 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 08, 2024

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Before my birthday came me and my boyfriend used to talk very romantically and was obsessed with eachother ..he was planning something special for my birthday as surprise present for me but I didn't knew about this ..later he asked me for a night stay with him on my birthday as he's also leaving for his home from his hostel on the next very day of my birthday but due to some family reason I couldn't make time for him on my birthday and i cancelled it because I had to idea of him planning something special for me...From that day he's upset with me and is not talking to me properly I even apologized him so many times and he didn't even meet me before going home..and now he's in his home for 10 days ahead...some days back he told me that his parents is little bit strict so it will be tough for him to have phone calls with me infront of them so he won't be able to make time for me to talk in his home and i understood it...now he's not even picking up my calls and his reply takes 7-8 hours to respond and is still upset with me ...i don't what should I do now i somehow feel like he's lose interested in me and finding someone else or he's really busy spending time with his parents as he's away from his home for year.
Ans: Dear Maria,

Give him the benefit of the doubt; maybe he is prioritizing his parents- like you mentioned, he is visiting home after a year. It is also possible that he is trying to do what you did to him on your birthday- you chose your family over him and now he's doing the same. But all of these are theories and it isn't fair to assume. If you have a strong gut feeling that he is ignoring you intentionally, then express your concerns verbally. You will get some clarity from his answer and tone.

Coming to your birthday chaos, I understand he might have been hurt because you couldn't make time for him. But what's done is done and you have said your quota of sorries too. You can only apologize genuinely so many times; after that, it is just forced. Let him cool down, things might get better on their own. But if it doesn't, just talk to him. Communication is important in a relationship.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4986 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on May 24, 2025

Career
My daughter got 94.67 percentile in jee mains.her obs rank is 27873.we are from rajasthan.can she get nit.if yes than which nit and branch.
Ans: Hemlata Madam, Here is, How to Predict Your Chances of Admission into NIT or IIIT or GFTI After JEE Main/Advanced Results – A Step-by-Step Guide

Providing precise admission chances for each student can be challenging. Some reputed educational websites offer ‘College Predictor’ tools where you can check possible college options based on your percentile, category, and preferences. However, for a more accurate understanding, here’s a simple yet effective 9-step method using JoSAA’s past-year opening and closing ranks. This approach gives you a fair estimate (though not 100% exact) of your admission chances based on the previous year’s data.

Step-by-Step Guide to Check Your Admission Chances Using JoSAA Data
Step 1: Collect Your Key Details
Before starting, note down the following details:

Your JEE Main percentile
Your category (General-Open, SC, ST, OBC-NCL, EWS, PwD categories)
Preferred institute types (NIT, IIIT, GFTI)
Preferred locations (or if you're open to any location in India)
List of at least 3 preferred academic programs (branches) as backups (instead of relying on just one option)
Step 2: Access JoSAA’s Official Opening & Closing Ranks
Go to Google and type: JoSAA Opening & Closing Ranks 2024
Click on the first search result (official JoSAA website).
You will land directly on JoSAA’s portal, where you can enter your details to check past-year cutoffs.
Step 3: Select the Round Number
JoSAA conducts five rounds of counseling.
For a safer estimate, choose Round 4, as most admissions are settled by this round.
Step 4: Choose the Institute Type
Select NIT, IIIT, or GFTI, depending on your preference.
If you are open to all types of institutes, check them one by one instead of selecting all at once.
Step 5: Select the Institute Name (Based on Location)
It is recommended to check institutes one by one, based on your preferred locations.
Avoid selecting ‘ALL’ at once, as it may create confusion.
Step 6: Select Your Preferred Academic Program (Branch)
Enter the branches you are interested in, one at a time, in your preferred order.
Step 7: Submit and Analyze Results
After selecting the relevant details, click the ‘SUBMIT’ button.
The system will display Opening & Closing Ranks of the selected institute and branch for different categories.
Step 8: Note Down the Opening & Closing Ranks
Maintain a notebook or diary to record the Opening & Closing Ranks for each institute and branch you are interested in.
This will serve as a quick reference during JoSAA counseling.
Step 9: Adjust Your Expectations on a Safer Side
Since Opening & Closing Ranks fluctuate slightly each year, always adjust the numbers for safety.
Example Calculation:
If the Opening & Closing Ranks for NIT Delhi | Mechanical Engineering | OPEN Category show 8622 & 26186 (for Home State), consider adjusting them to 8300 & 23000 (on a safer side).
If the Female Category rank is 34334 & 36212, adjust it to 31000 & 33000.
Follow this approach for Other State candidates and different categories.
Pro Tip: Adjust your expected rank slightly lower than the previous year's cutoffs for realistic expectations during JoSAA counseling.

Can This Method Be Used for JEE April & JEE Advanced?
Yes! You can repeat the same steps after your April JEE Main results to refine your admission possibilities.
You can also follow a similar process for JEE Advanced cutoffs when applying for IITs.

Have some other options also as back-ups instead of relying only on JEE/JoSAA.

Want to Learn More About JoSAA Counseling?
If you want detailed insights on JoSAA counseling, engineering entrance exams, preparation strategies, and engineering career options, check out EduJob360’s 180+ YouTube videos on this topic!

Hope this guide helps! All the best for your admission and a bright future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4986 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on May 24, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 24, 2025
Career
Sir i have scored 95 percentile (75k) in jee mains and home state is rajasthan gen cat i was looking at bit mesra pec chandigarh for mechanical/civil and are these better options or should i go for north eastern nits and nits pondicherry nit raipur and tier 3 nits and i am confident enoungh i will be able to secure rvce cse in comedk which would be great option for me i have equal interest in core and tech branch and pls suggest good iiits to me
Ans: Prefer RVCE if you Score below AIR-500 through COMKEDK, if fee is affordable for you. With a 95 percentile and around 75,000 rank in JEE Mains, admission to top NITs or IIITs for CSE is unlikely, but you can secure seats in mid-tier NITs like NIT Silchar, NIT Meghalaya, NIT Pondicherry, and NIT Raipur for Mechanical or Civil branches. These NITs are improving rapidly in academics and placements and provide good core engineering education. Tier 3 NITs such as NIT Agartala and NIT Manipur are also accessible options. BIT Mesra and PEC Chandigarh are reputed private universities with strong programs and placements in core branches and are good alternatives if you prefer private institutes. For tech-oriented branches, newer IIITs like IIIT Bhopal, Bhubaneswar, and Vadodara offer CSE, IT, or ECE branches with decent placement records and accept ranks around your range. Since you have equal interest in core and tech, choosing Mechanical or Civil in NITs or BIT/PEC is advisable for core engineering, while IIITs or private universities can be considered for tech branches. Balancing branch preference with college reputation and placement prospects will help you make the best choice. All the best for your admission and a bright future!

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |4986 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on May 24, 2025

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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