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How to Make My Parents Understand My Boyfriend's Financial Situation?

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1312 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Aug 14, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Aug 13, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

Me and my boyfriend are dating form past seven years, he’s not from a well to do family and I am. How do I tell my parents that I want to marry him? He is working etc but he has a lot of liabilities so far to pay off and to take care of his family too. My family won’t understand this. How to I convince them

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Don't try and convince them but simply address their worries and concerns. Surely, they wish you well and want to see you comfortable. So, sit with them and address every worry and concern rather than force them into a decision.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1312 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 03, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 27, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi ma’am My family is not accepting my boyfriend as he is not well settled and doesn’t have any savings. His parent are also divorced and father has a second marriage. The first children custody is still with parents however my boyfriend and his brother live with his mother. He is 5 year younger than me. My family is not accepting my relationship and showing me new proposals every day. To borrow some time i am just refusing the proposal my giving some excuses but now they know that i am still not out from him and waiting for him to get settled. Kindly let me know how can i convince my family to accept my relationship. My boyfriend is working day and night to get settled and have a good account balance. Please advise.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
If your daughter came to you with the same situation, how would you advise her?
Would you not tell her your concern that she is actually choosing someone who may not be able to support her when she goes on maternity leave? Would you not tell her that coming from a broken family, she may have to take care of her boyfriend and possibly parent him on different occasions? Your parents are only concerned for you and are unable to tell you what they are worried about. Put yourself in their situation and tell me that you will not be worried.

At the same time, I do get your frustration. What you can do is to work on your parents' concerns and buy time till your boyfriend manages to settle down. And it seems like he is doing all that he can to be in their good books. And that's the only way you can get them to accept him. Wait patiently and don't put him under pressure. Instead be supportive and at the same time, you continue to work and be independent as well.

Never try to convince someone who does not want to be convinced but instead work on how they can accept him by addressing their concerns.

All the best!

..Read more

Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |423 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 24, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Aug 16, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hello sir, I have been in relationship for 4 years, once my cousin elder caught me with my bf and told my parent. I told my parents that I wanted to get marry with him. But they denied. Due to my brother listening. Now it's been 4 years from that period. My bf is asking me for marriage. I wanted to convience my parents. But I m not able to tell them. And my Bf is less educated and I am employed graduate person. He works as a driver,but loves me a core. What shall I do to convience my parent. As Im of 25 years old and he is one year elder then me
Ans: Dear Anonymous,

I understand that you are in a challenging situation. If you want to convince your parents, the first thing is to acknowledge their concerns. It is normal for parents to be worried about their child's future. You mentioned your partner is comparatively less educated than you and works as a driver; while every profession is equally important and as long as he is honest and hardworking and puts food on the table, he is doing well, parents can find the financial situation a little concerning. Instead of avoiding or being defensive about these concerns, address them. Let them know how you plan on tackling these differences in your relationship. Emphasize his character, personality, and all the qualities that drew you to him. Tell them how you have been in a stable relationship for 4 years, despite all the odds. In today's day and age, that is a huge thing. Convincing them would also require you to show that you are mature enough to make this decision so have the discussion once you and your partner have a solid plan and have the nitty-gritty all sorted.

Be practical and do not expect them to be onboard immediately. They have your best interest at heart and you know that your situation isn't ideal. Give them time to come around. It might take some compromises as well.

In the end, I would also urge you to think this through before introducing the relationship to your parents. Marriage is a big decision. Ultimately, it's your happiness and life at stake. Don't rush.

Best Wishes.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |7070 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Nov 20, 2024

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Money
Sir, in how many years , I can turn 1crore to 20 crore.So that I can retire.Im investing about 1.35lakh as sip every month . Im 44 now . I have about 60 lakh iin different funds now, im hoping to reach a crore 2026.Thanks in advance.
Ans: To achieve a corpus of Rs 20 crore with your current financial inputs, let's break it down step by step:

Your Current Investments and SIP Plan
Current Investment: Rs 60 lakh (expected to grow to Rs 1 crore by 2026).
Monthly SIP Contribution: Rs 1.35 lakh.
Expected Rate of Return: 12% annually.
Timeframe to Reach Rs 20 Crore
With a starting corpus of Rs 1 crore (by 2026) and continuing a SIP of Rs 1.35 lakh monthly at 12%, it will take 23 years to grow to Rs 20 crore.
By the time you turn 67 years old, your desired retirement corpus can be achieved.


Key Assumptions
The 12% return assumption is realistic for equity-heavy portfolios. However, past performance is no guarantee for the future.
The SIP contributions should continue consistently without interruption for the given timeframe.
Inflation and changing lifestyle expenses are not considered here.

Points to Consider
Diversify Your Investments: Ensure your portfolio includes a mix of equity and debt. Adjust allocations as you approach retirement to reduce risk.

Monitor Progress Regularly: Periodically review your investments and returns. Rebalancing may be necessary to stay aligned with your goal.

Increase SIP Contributions Gradually: With rising income, consider increasing your SIPs by 5-10% annually to reduce the timeframe.

Emergency Fund and Insurance: Ensure you have a robust emergency fund and sufficient term insurance to secure your family.

High-Level Suggestion
We can fine-tune the investment strategy and assess the risks involved in detail.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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