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Autistic Son, Marital Issues, No Career: Mom Seeks Escape - How to Restart?

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |533 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Kanchan Rai has 10 years of experience in therapy, nurturing soft skills and leadership coaching. She is the founder of the Let Us Talk Foundation, which offers mindfulness workshops to help people stay emotionally and mentally healthy.
Rai has a degree in leadership development and customer centricity from Harvard Business School, Boston. She is an internationally certified coach from the International Coaching Federation, a global organisation in professional coaching.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Sep 03, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

I have an autistic son of 4 year old. I feel depressed while taking his care. My married life is also not good. I dont have career. I want to run away from my son. I am unable to understand how to restart my career

Ans: If you're feeling like running away, it's a sign that you need support—emotionally, physically, and mentally. Do you have anyone you trust who can help, even for short periods, so you can take a break? Support groups for parents of autistic children (both online and offline) can also be a great place to find understanding, advice, and emotional relief.

As for restarting your career, it’s never too late. Since you have childcare responsibilities, looking into work-from-home or flexible jobs might be a good first step. What was your field of interest before marriage? Do you have any skills that can be refreshed? Even small steps, like taking online courses or freelancing, can help you regain confidence and financial independence.

You’re dealing with so much right now, and you don’t have to figure it all out at once. The most important thing is to take one step at a time—whether it's seeking emotional support, finding small ways to regain control of your career, or even just taking a moment for yourself. If the depression feels overwhelming, reaching out to a therapist or counselor might be really helpful. You deserve support, and your well-being matters just as much as your child's.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1494 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 18, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 11, 2023Hindi
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Hi Anu,Iam completely in to a bad a stage.I lost my job,my son is a disabled kid doesn't have money to run future completely in hell Been a banker for 19 years and not getting any jobs outside Please suggest what should be my next step
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I do hear you...
It is perhaps time to do something different. You have a wealth of experience of 19 years and it can be put to good use.
Independent consulting in Wealth management maybe something that you might want to consider. There are courses online that help you get initiated in this and using your Banking knowledge it maybe possible to consider this option.
Also, speak with your close circle of friends and family and take their advice as well. It will also help you to take strategic advice from someone in your field and who has also is updated with all the current happenings. Someone senior is what I suggest...
What you need is some direction which this expert in your field can offer...what else you need is some confidence, which you need to instil within yourself.

When something does not work, do something else for a different result...But giving up hope is the worst option...Push yourself to think different and ask:
What else can I do to make things work?
What can I do differently than before for things to align better for me?
How can I keep my state of mind upbeat even though things are not going well for me?

Asking useful questions can change the course of one's life...So keep at it please...

All the best!

..Read more

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Ravi

Ravi Mittal  |526 Answers  |Ask -

Dating, Relationships Expert - Answered on Feb 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 08, 2025
Relationship
Me and my girlfriend we both are in relationship from about last 2 years (almost). After such a long time I got to know that she had 2 relationships before me that too she didn't told I got to know it by third person she was sexually involved too (not intercourse but yes other things with one of them)... When I asked her that why you didn't told anything to me before she said she was scared that if she'll tell it to me so I'll leave her and she really did not wanted that... She was scared to loose me. And she was still in contact with that guy and when I asked her that why you were still in contact with him (it's been around 3 years they got separated) so she says that she is like that only... She can't deny anyone because of her soft hearted nature but she did not had any feelings for him. She also said that once she even went to meet him when he requested to meet and also on the same she claims that her soft hearted nature has done that she wasn't able to deny. I loved her too much but now all these things are hurting me like anything. (She is my first relationship before her i never had anyone)
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I understand that you are hurt and the complexities of the hearts might be difficult sometimes to grasp. The first reason for your sorrow, her past relationship, and the fact that she was physically intimate with them is not completely justifiable. Though I understand that you feel hurt because she did not disclose it to you, still it should not matter so much as to ruin your present relationship. And whether she will open up about such sensitive details is actually up to her. It has nothing to do with how much she loves you or trusts you. Please understand that.

Now coming to the next thing, the fact that she is still in touch with them and has even met one of them, that is slightly concerning. It would have been okay if she did that openly- please understand that I am not saying she should have asked for your permission, but rather discuss the same with you. Moreover, in a relationship, it is also important to understand how much your partner is comfortable with- goes for both men and women. If you are uncomfortable with her relationship with her exes, she should consider that. I would have said the same if the table was turned. I suggest you have a clear conversation with her and express how you feel about this situation- depending on how she reacts and how the conversation goes, you both can think about the next step.

Hope this helps.

...Read more

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