Love Struggles: Figuring Out Genuine Interest from Casual Conversation

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

There are no hard and fast rules or specific ways of telling if someone is genuinely interested in you. It's more of a sense you get from them. For instance, does your love interest keep talking to you, even about the most trivial things? Do they listen to your mundane talks with utmost interest? Do they often go out of their way to make you feel happy or make time, even during their busiest days, for a quick meet-up? If so, yes, they are genuinely interested in you. People who are genuinely interested in one another also tend to discuss a future together, plan on introducing each other to their friends and family, and so on. Their general body language exudes their interest in you. Keep a look out for these signs.

Best wishes!

Ans: Dear Amar,

It can be difficult to tell if someone likes you, especially the way you want them to; needless to say, assumptions can do more harm than good. The best thing is to ask directly. But if you are not in a position to do so, you can look out for some tell-tale signs. See if she is interested in talking to you, if she initiates conversations as much as you do, notice her body language- does she feel comfortable with you? Does she remember certain details that you have shared with her in the past- it could mean that you are important to her. But remember, none of these are definitive. She could be exhibiting all of these signs and yet not be interested in you. Maybe it's just her being friendly or not trying to hurt your feelings.

If you really want to know how she feels, ask. There's nothing wrong with that. If she says no, respect it and back away. If yes, then amazing. But don't try to take a guess. I repeat- it will do more harm than good.

Best Wishes.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Stay away from her...this is just going to cause the family and you a lot of trouble.
Oh, by the way, what is the need to check what she wants from you?
The very fact that you are checking in here with me says that something doesn't seem right with the whole thing, yeah? Time-pass or real, don't mess around within the family!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: Dear Shan,
That’s a really good question. Before going to her place, try to build a mindset of understanding her, without any preconceived notion or pressure to get married. In terms of discussion, to understand emotional compatibility you can observe her behaviour- how she deals with stress, or how she might deal with conflict. Discuss daily life expectations, like what you like to do on weekends, do you enjoy occasional drinking or partying, do you enjoy spending time with friends, family gatherings, disciplined lifestyle, etc. Discuss about each other’s work life balance, expectations from in-laws and any non-negotiables. You should also discuss kids- if they want them, if you want them, and also when. Get clarity on expected living arrangements to avoid any future conflicts. These should be more than enough for a first-time meeting.
Hope these help