Home > Relationship > Question
Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help
Anu

Anu Krishna  |839 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 15, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Apr 10, 2024Hindi
Relationship

Dear Anu, Long story please read About the this incident : I am in really a bad situation from last 7 days, My father-in law took, my wife and my children away because, I asked about her attractive behavior (Sexual tentative not sure) , she has shown towards our neighbor. I already directly warned her about his wrong starring twice, year before when we went for 4 families trip. (I have proof from her google account to show she has done wrong searches about him like searching for nickname of boyfriend with his designation etc ...) She is running her own business which is started by her on my encouragement and running ok from 7 years. Suddenly for some work, I called her she is missing from her office for 2.5 hours and no one knows where she went, After 2.5 hours I got a call and when I asked, she said Its a surprise and will tell later. Next day too she said It is secret and will tell later, third day too she said she went out for roaming.(my surprise was, in hot summer day on byke roaming at 10.15 am to 12.15 am ... na naa something is wrong). I started tracking her email by taking her password and notification accepted by her on her mobile. Then I realized the web activity(she was not aware of these things will get stored in google till then), as I said above like gift for boy friend and romantic nick name for someone special who is having xxx designation etc ... always smiling person. Attraction synonyms ... casual sex and serious relationship difference a video etc... All these are only from starting of 3rd March 2024. My Heart was broken, as I am staying in different city and already have plans to go home in few days, I somehow manged 2 days and went home. Next, I was all-over her with big fight. I was blaming her for everything even not feeding kids on time, as I was saying she gets time to spend on chatting or searching etc... I was literally went to nuts, as I warned about him to be careful 2 years ago couple of tiimes. She said she is innocent, she didn't searched all the above I have shown her photos taken from my mobile with her track. she asked how did you know I searched for her, Because of using his designation in search. Finally she agreed she meet him for 15 mints on some professional work, on 16th march and went out after that for another place. But google timelines shows she was at home for entire 2.2 hours. why should she lie for remaining 1.5 hrs if there is nothing wrong happened. why should she say 15 mints only, when she meet him for a profession reason for 2 hours. I am literally not satisfied with her answers. Next day morning my mom returned home, (she don't know anything) from a function in other city which she went 10 days ago. (All these episodes happened next day my mom left home according to search history). Suddenly wife in early hours kept suicide note and left home. I was just sleeping in next room, my mom saw the note and woke me up. Finally we found her on our terrace staircase sleeping there as she takes medication for sleep, she has zero negative artistes. I booked ticket for her dad immediately and asked him to come same day, shown him and explained him all this. That day he is calm and asked what you want to do. I was thinking positive that he tells her not to repeat and stay for a week and go home. He said he wanted his wife to talk to her(my mother-inlaw), I said book ticket for her but unfortunately tickets were not available, seems he is also not interested to book ticket. After next day I intentionally went out by taking my daughter for 3 hours informing, I am going out for 3 hours to him. I thought he will speak to her privately to help her understand. But not sure nothing happened my mother said, he was sitting in living room whole 3 hours and she is in bedroom. Next day she said she is not going for office as I am doubting her behavior.(My in-laws never wanted her to work from start marriage) . But before marriage it self I informed them I am looking for a working wife. As they didn't let her attend job interviews, I am forced to invest in business, my hard earned one year salary with loan and made her owner there. I thought she would be also be happy as owner. She is happily running this for 7 years (of-course no profits and I never insisted too much on profits too as I already closed the loan in 4 years from my salary). Past Episode 1 : 1) when we got arranged married, I was in love with a girl and also deep relationship staying with her for few years too. I just gave her a hint as I took her for my GF marriage reception. (Even I loved her my GF with full heart, due to known reason for both of us, I informed her, I will not marry her before, I stay with her). Once she found a letter from my GF and wrote an email to her husband about out Love afair, I am not sure he took that seriously. 2) My wife also have some love story but, I never asked about that as he didn't want to revel that any time.(its ok before marriage something happen in life), I have an idea about that within short span of marriage, as she was sending messages after 11.30 pm etc. After observing couple of months, warned her twice not do so. one day I was anger and left to office, as I saw her texting again previous night. Evening when, I returned home, she was crying like a baby sitting in living room saying as she had swallowed 10 tablets given to her some reason to attempt suicide. I was shocked and rushed her to hospital and fortunately able to save her. Never discussed about that anytime after that. Episode 2: After around 8 years of smooth life and 2 children, after starting the business one night, I was watching movie in living room and went to bedroom, wife suddenly got surprised and hiding her mobile. I asked her why are you hiding and give me the mobile she didn't, I tried to get the reach of mobile and she didn't let that happen as she hold it strong, I left and came back to other room to sleep. But next morning, she was showing anger on me and vice-versa, I had a quarrel and called up her dad after 3 to 4 days, That time he asked what is the proof she is chatting with someone in night, I don't as I didn't snatched her mobile forcefully. He said she won't do anything like that and asked to be peaceful, after few days thing became normal, as I also don't have proof, I thought it might be mistake my side too. Episode 3 : She started going to a super market everyday at particular time every day. Even though she comes though same road just 1 hour before, she wont stop and get items form there, she used to go after getting ready every day for 15 to 20 days, I observed pattern. Generally she goes with my kids skating to classes in our gated community only and used leave from there. I used to go and meet some friends near that skating classes after a while, but some times she used to be not there, I Observed the pattern she was missing continuously from 15 to 20 days after dropping kids there, I followed by my car and searched didn't found her in the regular place where she tells, after 15 to 20 mints, I was standing there she came to the place, when I asked her she said she went for Vegetables shop near by and shown place and a couple veg's she bought. I was working in reputed software org and earning well. I always think about my wife and children even, I am away from home. For example I go to airport, I buy chocolates for my children, I check, If I can get my wife a good watch deal or buy a bag as she like watches but wont try to spend 200 for a coffee in airport. I go to GOA with friends buy clothes from there, by reducing the bottles, I always show lot of love towards, children and wife as I was working from home past 4 years. Love doesn't mean, I tell her I love you or something, but I always felt pain if she is not well or I never said no, If she asked me take for shopping or somewhere etc. we are always going to movies Of-course its on my interest. never restricted anything for her to spend. Point to note she always spends carefully too. I only encourage her to spend more for to buy anything she wants. This is our present. Taken them to holidays now and then etc ... with all above episodes she says I am doubting her, Am I really? or she is creating the situations? 1) Even after warning not send messages after 11.00 pm in night or asked whom she sent no answer. 2) Episode 2 hiding mobile and giving mobile to me 3) Episode 3 even though she comes in same path every day for a specific time staying in same place 4) Episode 4 Even after warning her about bad starring going for professional her with out discussing and deleting call history of him ( 11 sort calls of 40 to 60 seconds and 2 calls on 4 mints each, in a span of 20 days) and mid night searches etc... am I bad guy? or am I trying to saving my wife from this evil intentions we know in society? What if I would have left her for the them, will my family relation will stay, what would it shows her as? will I become a responsible husband? Now she is trying for a job in her city with parents encouragement and trying to get admission for my daughter in Garde 1, even she has completed Garde 2 this year. Not sure about my son yet. She is spoiling daughter studies. My cute children are not with me now, I came back to my office and staying in PG from yesterday. Not able to concentrate on work or other things, literally crying at times in wash rooms.(even at airport when I saw children of my age went to washroom and cried a lot). what should I do go and beg her for getting angry on her? tell her with whom ever you chat and go I wont bother come home? or leave her and children for their fate? what the use for earning this salary when I cant spend time with my children? everyone says wait for her realize her mistake, If she gets job and takes admission in school will she even consider coming back to me? her mother always controls her father, same her sister in-law with her brother(love marriage). Now my mother and couple of friends(close) say, if I go she will treat you like a slave she will come and do same thing again you cant even ask her. After going home they tried to destroy the evidence I have by formatting mobile by logging into google account and erase device. That is a business mobile she didn't even bothered about customer base of 7 years contacts. Fortunately I could recover contacts. I could also get to know her personal email id that's how I cam to know about her job search and admission search of children. what should I do now? Please advice immediately.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
My suggestion to couples who are at constant loggerheads and on the verge of a marriage breakdown:
- What can you do to put your marriage back together?
- Can you trust one another yet again?
- Are you both willing to set aside your differences and work towards your marriage?

You have given a detailed account of what has happened and one thing seems clear is that there is NO trust left within your marriage. This itself will prevent you from getting back together. Agreed that you have reasons and proof to doubt her, but if you both want the marriage to work, you will have to start fresh.
Also, the fact that she is searching for a job and also admission for the children suggests that she is looking at moving on without you. So, instead of making assumptions on what is happening and hoping for something to happen, it's time to request for a one-on-one chat with your wife. She may decline, but no harm in trying. The chat can bring forth what she has in mind and if she also wants to be in the marriage or move on. Knowing, asking, understanding can help and guide you on the next steps.

No point going around in circles playing this Hide and Seek game as a couple. Sit down, talk it out and take firm decisions. Your marriage will need a lot of trust and love to be rebuilt; are you willing to go through this journey?

All the best!
Asked on - Apr 19, 2024 | Answered on Apr 19, 2024
Listen
Hi Anu, I went ahead and spoke to my wife at their home for 2 hours personally and also took her out for lunch next day. Can you suggest me a good relationship Expert and Mind coach in Hyderabad? I insist only physical consultation this month last week and also next month first week, should be able to spend good time on our case, Not to be in hurry, to go to next case. (I think that would be good enough), I know it may take some sessions to bring it to a fruitful result. Please advice...
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
It is great to see you being so proactive on this situation that you are in.
On my part, it will not be professionally ethical to put down the name of an expert on a public platform without their consent. In that case, you can browse the internet for centers for marriage therapy/relationship coaching in Hyderabad. Check on their credentials before signing up with any expert. Request for a call where you can evaluate they are the right person for your situation. Once you do that, put your weight behind it and make sure that you are guided to sort your entire situation and reach a firm resolution.

All the best!

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Love Guru

Love Guru   |187 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert - Answered on Apr 07, 2022

Listen
Relationship
Dear LG, Please don't disclose my name. I don't want to share my personal problems with others. I am 45 years old, married 13 years ago; my wife's age is now 38 years. I got two kids. My wife is pretty (she takes lot of care for her beauty) and I want to live simple. I kept faith on my wife so I didn't interfere in her life. From last four years, I am staying away from family (because of work I have shifted to other city, monthly once I go back , purchase everything, give money for expense and return to job). She keeps her mobile with security. Once, by mistake, I read her WhatsApp message. One of her office client was praising her pics and she was responding to him. So I told her, be official, don't entertain, if they fall behind you and we may face problem. She agreed but is doing the same thing and deleting his messages. Then I wanted to see what all things she does in WhatsApp. So her link I shared in my mobile and started reading her messages. She use to chat with one married person from last three years, she changed his name in her mobile and kept his wife's name. Three years back he proposed her with love song. My wife used to support him, sometimes she used to delete the messages. He knows all my family history. Whenever they get time, they used to talk each other in phone. Some messages I read, they were planning to meet also. She always come home very late, I didn't question her because I kept faith, but as I told you I have two kids in home. If she comes late, they are facing a problem (they stay alone until she comes back). Simultaneously she is chatting with another married friend. She says he is like a brother in front of me, but that person says baby, darling, dear, love, etc, in his conversation and forwarded some love songs and calling her for long drive. My wife replied some other day we will go. He replies, You always says same thing. I will become old one day. Then I was surprised and guided my wife indirectly. I told, don't entertain any person they may start to trouble you or if anybody troubling you please tell I will help you. We got two kids so we got lot of responsibility. She got a clue that I am reading her messages, so immediately she deleted all messages and after some days she deleted their numbers, along with that she deleted some other numbers also!  Why, I don't know. Once I told my son, beware, I can track you and tell where are you going and what are you doing. But from that day onwards, my wife is blocking her internet at 6 pm (when her office closes) and unblocking when she returns home. I am worried regarding this behaviour. I have stopped reading her messages now. But now I am feeling very uncomfortable because her behaviour is very soft with me, (previously she was very aggressive, she used to fight with me unnecessarily.) Please guide me how to handle the situation. What can I do now? Sometimes I feel I should leave everything go somewhere or is it a punishment for marrying a pretty girl? What to do? Please guide how handle the situation. Regards.
Ans:

So, in a nutshell, you think your wife was flirting behind your back, you dropped some hints and then she has either stopped, or then stopped you from spying on her phone.

First of all, why are you dropping hints to her instead of talking straight? Which husband is going to appreciate his wife being wooed by other men with all this darling-baby love talk?

Even if she’s not having an affair, the flirty behaviour is bound to make you uncomfortable. Don’t you think you should call her out on it instead of pretending like some other man is making her uncomfortable?

Clearly, she’s enjoying the attention!

You seem very timid and intimidated by your wife. And if her behaviour has changed toward you for the better because you suspect she is guilty of something, all the more reason to get to the bottom of it!

Stop playing games and pussyfooting around her. Do some straight-talking for a change instead of going behind her back and reading messages!

And FYI, being good-looking doesn’t give any spouse licence to make their partner insecure!

 

..Read more

Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |183 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 26, 2023

Listen
Relationship
Dear Mam, I am a 46 year old married man for last 15 years. My wife is 39 year old ... We had an arranged marriage. The marriage all along appeared very happy, so to me. We had a very happy married life.. Our elder child is 13 years. ..... We have another who is 6 year .. ..... Around 8 years back my wife was regularly chatting with her old friend and he was openly flirting... I asked my wife to be careful and stop it.. Which she promised..... ... But she never did, she used to delete the chats and occasionally drop his name... I thought she is a wife, a mother and trusted her.... Last year i came to know that she was meeting him too.. I confronted her... and she gave excuses that it was just few... And she only sat in his Car and took some rides, never got down, never went with him anywhere... Never went to any place, apartment or hotel.. and she insisted it was just few and very recent. ... I checked and found she has met him earlier too.. I checked and found she had paused her google timeline off and on.. She had his contact as hidden in Hangouts, and had exchanged some photographs of hers with my Son to him.. She used to gift him on his birthday........ She was regularly chatting and delteting the messages on all forums with him... On again confronting, she admitted that this all started in 2016...and these are the only visits... She claiming she was afraid so didnt tell all initially.. She says she has met him, but never comitted Adultery... She saying she is remorseful, did a very big blunder and trying all hard to win back my trust... But its very hard to believe and trust...the reason 1) She did not disclose everything to me on first time of confronting...she disclosed only recent visits 2) On being asked to cut off all contacts..she told me she has asked her friend not to contact her thru any mode, but she did not delete him/block him from WhatsApp, Facebook, Truecaller, Mobile contact list..this i had to do. 3) Third she admitted she liked Going out wit him.......4) She so silently used to chat with him even when i was around all these years that i did not suspect....We both are working.. ..please Suggest ..... Hope my identity will not be Disclosed
Ans: Discovering that your wife is talking and meeting with a friend and hiding it from you can be a challenging and stressful situation. If you feel that the friend is flirting with your wife, it can further complicate things and cause feelings of jealousy, insecurity, and mistrust. However, it is essential to approach the situation calmly and objectively and take steps to address the issue.

The first thing to do is to communicate openly and honestly with your wife. Express your concerns and feelings and ask her to explain her relationship with the friend. Listen carefully to her side of the story and try to understand her perspective. It may be that there is a reasonable explanation for their interactions, such as a long-standing friendship or a professional relationship.

However, if you still feel uncomfortable with their interactions and suspect that there may be something more going on, it is essential to address the issue directly. Let your wife know how their interactions make you feel and explain why you feel uncomfortable with their friendship. It is essential to avoid accusing your wife of anything and instead focus on your own feelings and concerns.

It is also important to consider your own behavior in the relationship. Are you feeling jealous or insecure due to your own issues, or is there a valid reason for your concerns? Take some time to reflect on your own feelings and assess the situation objectively.

If you feel that the friend is indeed flirting with your wife, it may be necessary to set some boundaries. Let your wife know what behavior is unacceptable and make it clear that you expect her to respect your feelings and the boundaries you have set.

In some cases, seeking the help of a professional counselor or therapist may be beneficial. A therapist can help you both work through your feelings and emotions and develop a plan to move forward in a healthy and positive way.

It is essential to approach the situation with patience, understanding, and open communication to ensure that you can navigate this difficult time and move forward in a positive direction.

..Read more

Latest Questions
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1744 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 09, 2024

Listen
Money
Hi mam, I have invested in sips from last 5 years but I invested through a brooker and he invested and managed my portfolio in regular mutula funds. I have invested like 8 lakhs and got a market values of like 14 lakhs on that investment, but now I want to convert my regular funds into direct funds. I am confused if i should do that or not. As i have got good returns due to covid 19 dip and ukraine war.
Ans: It's great to hear that your investments have performed well over the past five years, especially during turbulent times like the COVID-19 pandemic and the Ukraine war. Converting your regular funds into direct funds can offer several advantages, but it's essential to weigh the pros and cons before making a decision.
Advantages of Direct Funds:
1. Lower Expense Ratio: Direct funds typically have lower expense ratios compared to regular funds since they do not involve distributor commissions. Over time, lower expenses can translate into higher returns for investors.
2. Higher Returns: With lower expenses, direct funds have the potential to generate higher returns over the long term, leading to increased wealth accumulation.
3. Control and Transparency: Investing in direct funds gives you greater control over your investments and allows for better transparency regarding fund performance and NAVs.
Considerations Before Converting:
1. Exit Load: Check if there are any exit loads associated with your current investments in regular funds. Exiting prematurely may result in additional costs.
2. Tax Implications: Evaluate the tax implications of switching from regular to direct funds. Depending on your investment horizon and gains, there may be capital gains tax implications.
3. Investment Expertise: Assess your comfort level and expertise in managing your investments directly. Direct funds require investors to conduct their research and make informed decisions.
! Let's discuss the advantages of sticking with regular funds, especially when investing through a professional Mutual Fund Distributor (MFD) with a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) credential.
Benefits of Regular Funds through an MFD with CFP Credential:
1. Expert Guidance: A professional MFD with a CFP credential offers personalized advice tailored to your financial goals, risk tolerance, and investment horizon. They provide valuable insights and recommendations to optimize your investment portfolio.
2. Holistic Financial Planning: MFDs with CFP credentials offer holistic financial planning services beyond just mutual fund investments. They assess your entire financial situation, including income, expenses, liabilities, and goals, to develop a comprehensive financial plan.
3. Risk Management: Professional MFDs employ risk management strategies to mitigate market volatility and minimize losses. They conduct thorough research and due diligence to select suitable funds that align with your risk profile and investment objectives.
4. Regular Monitoring and Review: MFDs continuously monitor your investments and review their performance to ensure they remain aligned with your financial goals. They provide timely updates and recommendations based on changing market conditions and economic outlook.
5. Convenience and Support: MFDs offer convenience by handling all administrative tasks related to your investments, such as documentation, transactions, and account management. They also provide ongoing support and guidance to address any queries or concerns you may have.
Disadvantages of Direct Funds:
1. Lack of Professional Advice: Direct funds require investors to make investment decisions independently without the guidance of a professional advisor. This can be challenging for individuals who lack the expertise or time to conduct thorough research and analysis.
2. Higher Risk of Errors: Investing directly in funds without professional guidance increases the risk of making errors such as selecting inappropriate funds, timing the market incorrectly, or failing to rebalance the portfolio regularly.
3. Limited Access to Resources: Direct investors may have limited access to research tools, market insights, and investment resources compared to those available through professional MFDs. This can hinder their ability to make informed investment decisions.
Conclusion:
Investing in regular funds through a professional MFD with a CFP credential offers numerous benefits, including expert guidance, holistic financial planning, risk management, and ongoing support. By leveraging the expertise of a qualified advisor, you can optimize your investment portfolio and achieve your financial goals more effectively.
Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1744 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 22, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Sir, give me the list of best Mutual Funds, if I have to invest around 80L.
Ans: I can't recommend specific mutual funds in an online forum, but I can definitely help you with the process of choosing them. Here's why:
• Performance is unpredictable: Past performance is not a guarantee of future results. A fund that's done well recently might not continue to do so.
• Risk tolerance is key: Different mutual funds have different risk profiles. What's a good fit for someone else might not be right for you.
• Financial goals matter: Are you saving for retirement, a child's education, or a down payment on a house? Your goals will influence the types of funds you choose.
Here's a better approach:
1. Talk to a certified financial planner (CFP): A CFP can assess your risk tolerance, financial goals, and investment time horizon. They can then recommend a mix of mutual funds that's right for you.
2. Consider your asset allocation: Asset allocation is how you spread your investments across different asset classes, like stocks, bonds, and cash. A common strategy is to be more aggressive (stock-heavy) when you're young and become more conservative (bond-heavy) as you near retirement.
3. Do your research: Once you have a better idea of what you're looking for, research different mutual funds. Look at their investment objectives, fees, and past performance (keeping in mind the first point above).
By following these steps, you'll be in a much better position to choose mutual funds that are right for you.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1744 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 09, 2024

Listen
Money
Hi i am Deepika,i am 28 yrs old i want to invest 10k per month for 10yrs.where i have to invest
Ans: Hello Deepika! It's fantastic that you're thinking about investing at such a young age. Investing early can significantly benefit your financial future. Let's explore some suitable investment options for you:
Mutual Funds via SIP:
1. Equity Mutual Funds: Consider investing in diversified equity mutual funds through SIPs. These funds have the potential to offer high returns over the long term. Look for funds with a proven track record and a focus on wealth creation.
2. ELSS Funds: Equity Linked Savings Schemes (ELSS) offer the dual benefit of tax savings under Section 80C of the Income Tax Act and potential wealth creation. ELSS funds have a lock-in period of three years, making them suitable for long-term investing.
Index Funds:
1. Nifty Index Funds: If you prefer a passive investment approach, you can consider investing in Nifty index funds. These funds aim to replicate the performance of the Nifty 50 index and offer low-cost investing options.
Tips for Investing:
1. Diversification: Spread your investments across different asset classes to reduce risk. Consider allocating a portion of your investment to debt funds or other fixed-income securities for stability.
2. Risk Tolerance: Assess your risk tolerance before investing. Equity investments carry higher risk but also offer the potential for higher returns over the long term. Ensure your investment strategy aligns with your risk appetite.
3. Long-Term Perspective: Investing for 10 years allows you to ride out market fluctuations and benefit from the power of compounding. Stay committed to your investment plan and avoid reacting to short-term market movements.
4. Regular Review: Periodically review your investment portfolio to ensure it remains aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance. Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner for personalized advice.
Conclusion:
By investing ?10,000 per month for the next 10 years, you can build a substantial corpus for your future financial goals. Consider the mentioned investment options and create a diversified portfolio tailored to your risk profile and investment objectives.
Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1744 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 22, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Hi ,I am 31 years old , working as software developer with in-hand salary of 1 lakh/month ,current expenses is 15000/month, my total investment is 15 lakh in mutual fund,5 lakh stock,4 lakh in ppf, currently investing 30,000/month in mutual fund,12,000/month in ppf,want to retire in next 10 years,can you suggest my e how to plan for retirement.
Ans: It's great to see your proactive approach towards planning for retirement at such a young age. Let's outline a retirement plan tailored to your financial situation and goals:
Assessing Your Current Situation:
1. Income and Expenses: With a monthly salary of ?1 lakh and expenses of ?15,000, you have a significant surplus for savings and investments.
2. Investment Portfolio: Your investments in mutual funds, stocks, and PPF indicate a diversified approach to wealth accumulation, which is a positive step.
Retirement Planning:
1. Define Retirement Goals: Determine your desired lifestyle and expenses during retirement. Consider factors like healthcare, travel, hobbies, and inflation when estimating future expenses.
2. Calculate Retirement Corpus: Based on your retirement goals and expected expenses, calculate the corpus required to sustain your lifestyle during retirement. Factor in inflation and potential healthcare costs.
3. Investment Strategy: Given your age and investment horizon of 10 years, focus on aggressive wealth accumulation. Consider increasing your monthly SIP contributions to mutual funds to accelerate growth.
4. Asset Allocation: Maintain a diversified portfolio across asset classes like equity, debt, and other investment avenues. Rebalance your portfolio periodically to align with your risk tolerance and retirement goals.
5. Tax Planning: Utilize tax-efficient investment options like Equity Linked Savings Schemes (ELSS), PPF, and NPS to maximize tax benefits and optimize returns.
6. Emergency Fund: Ensure you have an adequate emergency fund equivalent to 6-12 months of expenses to cover unforeseen circumstances during retirement.
7. Review and Adjust: Regularly review your retirement plan and make adjustments as needed to stay on track towards your goals. Seek guidance from a Certified Financial Planner for personalized advice and support.
Conclusion:
With disciplined saving, strategic investing, and careful planning, you can achieve your goal of retiring in the next 10 years. Stay focused on your retirement objectives and make informed decisions to ensure a financially secure future.
Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1744 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Apr 21, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
Hi Experts, I am 40 years old. I am investing in mutual fund SIPs. My portfolio has following funds each 1000Rs SIP monthly. 1) Quant Infrastructure 2) Quant Mid cap 3) Quant Small cap 4) Quant Active 5) Quant Flexi cap 6) ICICI Pru Infrastructure 7) ICICI Pru Bluechip 8) ICICI Pru Bharat 22 FOF 9) Nippon India Large cap 10) Nippon India Growth 11) Nippon Small cap 12) Nippon India Multi cap 13) Nippon Power & Infra 14) Aditya Birla Sun Life PSU 15) SBI PSU 16) Invesco PSU 17) JM Large cap 18) JM Value fund 19) JM Flexi cap 20) Tata Small cap 21) HDFC Mid cap opportunities 22) Mahindra Manulife Mid cap 23) Mahindra Manulife Multi cap 24) Motilal Oswal Mid cap. Am I good to continue on these funds? Do I need to add/remove any funds for a good portfolio. Please provide your thoughts.
Ans: It's commendable that you're investing in mutual funds through SIPs to build wealth for your future. However, your portfolio seems overly concentrated with a large number of funds, which may not necessarily translate into better returns. Let's review your portfolio and suggest any necessary adjustments for better diversification and performance:
Assessing Your Portfolio:
1. Quant Funds: These funds focus on quantitative strategies, which can be riskier and more volatile. Consider whether the strategy aligns with your risk tolerance and investment objectives.
2. ICICI Pru and Nippon India Funds: These are reputable fund houses offering a range of funds across different market segments. Review the performance and risk profile of each fund to ensure they meet your expectations.
3. PSU Funds: Investing in sector-specific funds like PSU funds increases concentration risk. While these funds may offer potential upside, they are susceptible to sector-specific risks.
4. Mid Cap and Small Cap Funds: These funds have the potential for high growth but come with increased volatility. Ensure they align with your risk tolerance and investment horizon.
Portfolio Optimization:
1. Consolidation: Consider consolidating your portfolio by reducing the number of funds. Focus on high-quality funds with strong track records and consistent performance.
2. Diversification: Aim for a well-diversified portfolio across different asset classes, market caps, and sectors to spread risk and optimize returns.
3. Exit Strategy: Evaluate the underperforming funds and consider exiting those that consistently lag behind their benchmarks or peers. Redirect the proceeds to more promising opportunities.
4. Professional Advice: Consult with a Certified Financial Planner to review your portfolio comprehensively and tailor it to your financial goals, risk tolerance, and investment horizon.
Conclusion:
While your current portfolio includes several funds, it may benefit from streamlining and optimizing for better performance and risk management. By focusing on quality over quantity and maintaining a diversified approach, you can enhance the potential for long-term wealth creation.
Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1744 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 09, 2024

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1744 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 09, 2024

Listen
Money
I am investing rs.5000 every month in five different sip plan. can you explain me how the amount grows?
Ans: Let's break down how your investment of ?5,000 per month in five different SIP plans grows over time.
SIP, or Systematic Investment Plan, is a method of investing a fixed amount regularly in mutual funds. When you invest ?5,000 every month in SIPs, you're purchasing units of mutual fund schemes at the prevailing Net Asset Value (NAV).
Here's how your investment grows:
1. Regular Contributions: Every month, you invest ?5,000 in each SIP plan, totaling ?25,000 per month across all five plans.
2. NAV Fluctuations: The NAV of mutual fund schemes fluctuates daily based on market conditions and the performance of underlying assets. When you invest, you buy units at the NAV prevailing on the investment date.
3. Compounding: Over time, your investments benefit from the power of compounding. As your investment grows, the returns generated also earn returns, leading to exponential growth over the long term.
4. Market Performance: The growth of your investment is influenced by the performance of the underlying assets in each SIP plan. If the market performs well, the value of your investment increases, and vice versa.
5. Diversification: By investing in five different SIP plans, you spread your risk across multiple asset classes and fund managers, enhancing diversification and potentially reducing overall risk.
6. Time Horizon: The longer you stay invested, the more time your investment has to grow. Investing systematically over the long term allows you to ride out market volatility and benefit from the power of compounding.
It's essential to review the performance of your SIP plans periodically and make adjustments if needed to ensure they remain aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance. Consulting with a Certified Financial Planner can provide personalized guidance on optimizing your SIP investments for wealth accumulation.
By staying disciplined in your investments and focusing on long-term growth, you can build wealth steadily over time through SIPs.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1744 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 09, 2024

Listen
Money
I am looking at investing 20,000 per month in SIP ,please suggest good mix of funds which will help generate good wealth with balanced risk. Also thinking of adding some US funds exposure (like Parag Parikh fund)
Ans: Investing ?20,000 per month in SIPs is a commendable step towards building wealth. Let's design a diversified portfolio that balances risk and growth potential while considering your interest in adding exposure to US funds like Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund.
Here's a suggested mix of funds:
1. Large Cap Fund: Invest ?5,000 in a reputable large-cap fund like ICICI Prudential Bluechip Fund or HDFC Top 100 Fund. These funds invest in well-established, large companies, providing stability to your portfolio.
2. Mid Cap Fund: Allocate ?4,000 to a mid-cap fund such as Axis Midcap Fund or Kotak Emerging Equity Fund. Mid-cap stocks have the potential for higher growth but come with increased volatility.
3. Small Cap Fund: Allocate ?3,000 to a small-cap fund like SBI Small Cap Fund or HDFC Small Cap Fund. Small-cap stocks offer significant growth potential but are riskier and more volatile.
4. International Fund: Invest ?3,000 in an international fund like Parag Parikh Flexi Cap Fund. This fund provides exposure to global markets, including the US, diversifying your portfolio geographically and offering growth opportunities beyond domestic markets.
5. Balanced Fund: Allocate ?5,000 to a balanced fund like Mirae Asset Hybrid Equity Fund or ICICI Prudential Equity & Debt Fund. Balanced funds invest in a mix of equity and debt instruments, offering stability and growth potential.
This diversified portfolio spreads your investments across different market segments and geographies, reducing overall risk while maximizing growth potential. Regularly review your portfolio's performance and rebalance as needed to ensure it remains aligned with your financial goals and risk tolerance.
Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner to tailor the portfolio to your specific needs and objectives, ensuring optimal asset allocation and risk management.


Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1744 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 09, 2024

Listen
Money
Hello, I have the following Mutual Funds Investments, request you to let me know if these can be continued with or need to discontinue any of them, also please let me know new good performing funds to invest in. One time investment: (1) ICICI/ India Opportunities Fund - Growth - ?2,50,000, (2) ICICI/ Value Discovery Fund - Growth - ?2,50,000, (3) ICICI / Transporation & Logistics Fund - Growth - ?2,00,000. SIP Monthly: (4) Axis Flexi Cap Fund - Regular Plan - ?5,000, (5) Canara Robeco Emerging Equities - Regular Plan - ?5,000, (6) Aditya Birla SL Focused Equity Fund(G) - â‚15,000, (7) HDFC Mid-Cap Opportunities Fund(G) - ?5,000, (8) ICICI Pru Bluechip Fund(G) - ?5,000, (9) Axis Small Cap Fund - Regular Plan - ?5,000, (10) ICICI Prudential Technology Fund - Growth - ?5,000, (11) L&T Midcap Fund - HSBC Midcap Fund - ?5,000, (12) ICIPRU Multi-Asset Fund - Growth - ?5,000, (13) ICIPRU Value Discovery Fund - Growth - ?5,000. Thank You.
Ans: It's great to see your diversified portfolio of mutual funds. Let's review your current investments and suggest any adjustments needed to optimize your portfolio for better performance.
One-time Investments:
1. ICICI India Opportunities Fund - Growth: This fund focuses on Indian equity opportunities. Consider its performance and compare it with similar funds in the category. If it aligns with your investment goals, you can continue holding it.
2. ICICI Value Discovery Fund - Growth: This fund aims to identify undervalued stocks with the potential for growth. Review its performance and ensure it meets your expectations before deciding whether to continue or not.
3. ICICI Transportation & Logistics Fund - Growth: This sector-specific fund targets transportation and logistics companies. Assess its performance against relevant benchmarks and consider the outlook for the sector before making a decision.
SIP Monthly Investments:
4. Axis Flexi Cap Fund - Regular Plan: This fund offers flexibility across market caps. Review its performance and risk profile periodically to ensure it aligns with your investment strategy.
5. Canara Robeco Emerging Equities - Regular Plan: This fund focuses on emerging companies with growth potential. Monitor its performance relative to peers in the category and adjust your holdings accordingly.
6. Aditya Birla SL Focused Equity Fund(G): A focused fund concentrates on a limited number of high-conviction stocks. Review its performance and risk characteristics regularly to assess its suitability for your portfolio.
7. HDFC Mid-Cap Opportunities Fund(G): Mid-cap funds can offer higher growth potential but come with increased volatility. Evaluate its performance and risk metrics to determine if it aligns with your investment objectives.
8. ICICI Pru Bluechip Fund(G): Bluechip funds invest in large, well-established companies. Monitor its performance and consider its role in providing stability to your portfolio.
9. Axis Small Cap Fund - Regular Plan: Small-cap funds have the potential for significant growth but are more volatile. Assess its performance relative to benchmarks and consider your risk tolerance before making any changes.
10. ICICI Prudential Technology Fund - Growth: Sector-specific funds like technology can be volatile but offer growth opportunities. Review its performance and sector outlook periodically.
11. L&T Midcap Fund - HSBC Midcap Fund: Both funds focus on mid-cap companies. Evaluate their performance and risk characteristics to ensure they align with your investment strategy.
12. ICIPRU Multi-Asset Fund - Growth: Multi-asset funds provide diversification across asset classes. Review its performance and consider its role in balancing your portfolio.
13. ICIPRU Value Discovery Fund - Growth: This fund seeks undervalued stocks with growth potential. Monitor its performance and ensure it complements your overall investment strategy.
Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner to review your portfolio comprehensively and tailor it to your financial goals, risk tolerance, and investment horizon.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |1744 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 09, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 08, 2024Hindi
Listen
Money
I have started 16000 sip and I am 31 years now. MF portfolio: 1)Tata small cap direct growt:5000 2)Nippon India Large cal direct growth:4800 3)Motilal oswal midcap :3600 4) Parag parik elss fund:2500 Can you please review and suggest changes and improvement required.
Ans: It's fantastic to see your proactive approach towards investing in mutual funds at such a young age. Let's review your MF portfolio and discuss potential adjustments to optimize your investments for long-term growth.

Your current portfolio comprises funds across different market segments, which is a good start. However, there are a few considerations to enhance diversification and risk management:

Tata Small Cap Direct Growth: Small-cap funds can offer high growth potential but come with higher volatility. Given their risk profile, it's essential to allocate an appropriate portion of your portfolio to small caps. Consider reviewing the performance and risk metrics of this fund regularly.
Nippon India Large Cap Direct Growth: Large-cap funds provide stability and steady returns over the long term. It's a wise choice to have exposure to large-cap stocks for capital preservation and lower volatility. Continue monitoring the fund's performance and ensure it aligns with your investment objectives.
Motilal Oswal Midcap: Mid-cap funds offer the potential for high returns but carry higher risk compared to large-cap funds. Given your age and risk tolerance, a moderate allocation to mid-cap stocks can enhance portfolio diversification and growth potential. Monitor the fund's performance closely and consider rebalancing if necessary.
Parag Parikh ELSS Fund: ELSS funds offer tax-saving benefits along with the potential for wealth creation. It's a prudent choice to invest in ELSS funds for long-term goals while enjoying tax benefits under Section 80C of the Income Tax Act. Review the fund's performance and tax implications regularly.
When considering direct funds versus regular funds, it's essential to understand the disadvantages of direct funds. Direct funds require investors to conduct their research and make investment decisions independently, which can be time-consuming and may lead to suboptimal choices. On the other hand, investing through a Certified Financial Planner (CFP) with expertise in mutual fund selection can provide access to professional advice, personalized portfolio management, and ongoing guidance to navigate market volatility effectively.

To further diversify your portfolio, consider adding exposure to other asset classes like international funds, debt funds, or balanced funds. A well-diversified portfolio can help mitigate risk and optimize returns over the long term.

Regularly review your MF portfolio with a Certified Financial Planner to ensure it remains aligned with your financial goals, risk tolerance, and market conditions. Your CFP can provide personalized guidance and recommendations based on your unique circumstances.

By staying disciplined in your investments and making informed decisions, you're on the right path to achieving your financial objectives.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

Close  

You haven't logged in yet. To ask a question, Please Log in below
Login

A verification OTP will be sent to this
Mobile Number / Email

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to

Resend OTP in120seconds

Dear User, You have not registered yet. Please register by filling the fields below to get expert answers from our Gurus
Sign up

By signing up, you agree to our
Terms & Conditions and Privacy Policy

Already have an account?

Enter OTP
A 6 digit code has been sent to Mobile

Resend OTP in120seconds

x