I fear manipulation: How can I spot genuine care in relationships?

Ans: Firstly why do you wish to know about someone's past? Past is for a reason. And what can you do if they had one or several relationships before they entered one with you. Focus on the present and on the now. You not trusting him is your issue, and it is difficult to love someone you do not trust - please have that clarity. All the best.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
There's enough and more reading material on this topic on the Internet. You may read those to actually educate yourself.
So, if you are still unsure who narcissists are, how are you sure that your friend was a narcissist?
Also, what makes you hold on to something that happened 20 years back. We are surrounded by all kinds of people; when you know somewhere you are being taken for granted, your personality has begun to change to suit the other person, you seem to go overboard to please them, watch out...you could very well be under their control.
Having said that, be kind to yourself and what happened is done...just start to become more aware when you are around people.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

Ans: Dear Vidhan,
To identify if a girl is emotionally available, you need to pay attention to how she engages with you on a deeper level. Emotional availability shows in how openly and comfortably she communicates her feelings. If she talks about her emotions, her past, and her vulnerabilities without hesitation or discomfort, it’s a strong sign that she’s emotionally open. People who are emotionally available are consistent in how they treat you—they reach out regularly, show interest in your life, and don’t send mixed signals or create confusion about where you stand.

Another important sign is how she responds when you open up to her. If she listens attentively, responds with warmth, and shows genuine interest in understanding your emotions rather than dismissing them or changing the subject, she’s likely emotionally present. Someone who’s emotionally available will make you feel safe expressing yourself without fear of being judged or ignored. She won’t avoid emotional conversations or seem uncomfortable when things get deep. Instead, she’ll engage with you and try to meet you emotionally.