I fear manipulation: How can I spot genuine care in relationships?

Ans: Dear Anonymous,

There are no hard and fast rules or specific ways of telling if someone is genuinely interested in you. It's more of a sense you get from them. For instance, does your love interest keep talking to you, even about the most trivial things? Do they listen to your mundane talks with utmost interest? Do they often go out of their way to make you feel happy or make time, even during their busiest days, for a quick meet-up? If so, yes, they are genuinely interested in you. People who are genuinely interested in one another also tend to discuss a future together, plan on introducing each other to their friends and family, and so on. Their general body language exudes their interest in you. Keep a look out for these signs.

Best wishes!

Ans: Firstly why do you wish to know about someone's past? Past is for a reason. And what can you do if they had one or several relationships before they entered one with you. Focus on the present and on the now. You not trusting him is your issue, and it is difficult to love someone you do not trust - please have that clarity. All the best.

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Let's address the most important thing first, does she really love you? I am not sure about that. It's neither a solid yes or a solid no. But therein lies the challenge. If there is confusion, there is concern. Moreover, the habit of drawing comparisons with other people and how they treat their partners is an indication of a toxic relationship. I would urge you to rethink this relationship.

There will always be someone better out there- with a better car, a better-paying job, or even better looking, but that doesn't mean we stop loving our partner and leave them for that "better someone." Loving your partner is a choice you make every day. Having said that, it is okay if she wants someone "better." Let her. You deserve better too.

Please reconsider this relationship, especially if it is causing you so much sorrow.

Best wishes.

Ans: Dear Vidhan,
To identify if a girl is emotionally available, you need to pay attention to how she engages with you on a deeper level. Emotional availability shows in how openly and comfortably she communicates her feelings. If she talks about her emotions, her past, and her vulnerabilities without hesitation or discomfort, it’s a strong sign that she’s emotionally open. People who are emotionally available are consistent in how they treat you—they reach out regularly, show interest in your life, and don’t send mixed signals or create confusion about where you stand.

Another important sign is how she responds when you open up to her. If she listens attentively, responds with warmth, and shows genuine interest in understanding your emotions rather than dismissing them or changing the subject, she’s likely emotionally present. Someone who’s emotionally available will make you feel safe expressing yourself without fear of being judged or ignored. She won’t avoid emotional conversations or seem uncomfortable when things get deep. Instead, she’ll engage with you and try to meet you emotionally.