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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Apr 27, 2022

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
VM Question by VM on Apr 27, 2022Hindi
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Relationship

 Hi, I am married and I have a one year old boy.
My husband and I were good friends before marriage. After the marriage, for the first few days, he was very loving and caring. But he was reluctant to have physical intimacy and always avoided me. Later on, he started to pick up silly fights whenever I approached him with love. Then fights became a routine in our life. He accused me of being doubtful, jealous and arrogant, but I simply tried to solve the issue with him. At a later stage, his parents and younger brother intervened in the issues and they also had allegations against me.
They even tried to picturise me as a mental patient, who intentionally creates troubles. I was actually feeling lonely when even my parents told me to go for counselling. The psychologist whom I consulted, laughed at their accusations and suggested my husband to consult a family therapist. Even though he was reluctant initially, he came later to see a family therapist. After that, he started to love me, and we lived happily for a few months. Problems started to rise once again, when he came to know that I'm pregnant. He accused me of cheating him and his parents even tried to abort the baby without my knowledge. I opposed abortion, but they intentionally created chaos even in the eighth month of pregnancy. After the birth of the baby, every day, he would shout at me to leave the baby there and go somewhere.
He always said, I have a baby now, I don't want to make love anymore, never ever ask me to have sex. And the toxicity his parents are showing is also humiliating. I have 2 questions.
1. Why is my husband always reluctant to have a physical relationship?
He takes care of the baby well and showers love but neglects me and my needs often.
2. After all this toxicity, is it worth to stay with them? Narcissistic in-laws are making me violent and out of control, at times, harming myself. I am losing my self-esteem and falling into depression, nowadays. Please reply.

Ans:

Dear VM,

He is reluctant to have a physical relationship because deep down he has issues that he does not want to confront.

It could be emotional or physical issues that he is embarrassed to share as it might challenge his ‘manhood’.

Most people like to life in that false pride rather than solve the issue at hand.

So, he absolutely needs to go to a doctor or a therapist who can help him out of this issue and hence the two of you can begin to bond. Else today he accuses of cheating, tomorrow it will something else and then something else.

This issue is being beautifully masked by your in-laws who also possibly don’t know that their son needs HELP. So, it’s easy to blame it on you.

Staying with him or not is a personal decision that you must make. Ask yourself:

What is it that I am getting from being in this marriage?

What will I lose by walking out?

How will walking out impact the baby?

Do I have a support system that will stand by me as I choose to leave the marriage?

Evaluate your state of mind and focus on getting better by being happy and cheerful and reaching to those who can keep you in that state.

Whatever you choose to do, do not waste another moment here on wasteful situations and do what’s best for you and your baby which I am suer you can.

Best wishes!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jul 22, 2022

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Relationship
Hi Anu, I got married in Jan 2019 and it was an arranged marriage. Before marriage my husband loved me and we used to meet often and go out. But after marriage i got to know that his parents are extremely controlling and strict, they brainwashed him. A week into marriage we started fighting, and since then it's been a see-saw of love and hate. Soon we found out that he is impotent, but I helped him get over it, be it doctor's appointments or medicine, I took care of everything, it took us a year but we finally consummated our marriage. Then due to covid we moved to my in-laws’ house at his request. And then this marriage became hell to me, my in-laws started verbally abusing me every day though my husband tried to protect me but failed. I thought after the baby they would stop but it got worse so I took my 1-month-old baby and moved into my parents’ house. My husband came and begged me to not leave him, he said we'll move out to our own place. I agreed but then he called and told me that we'll go to another city after a year and I should stay with my mother till that time. BTW I am taking care of the baby all on my own financially, he won't do it unless I start living with him. I am financially independent. I don't know whether I should leave him or not, help?
Ans:

Dear S,

Time this one out! Which means, drop a deadline by having a conversation with your husband as to when your family will finally have a chance to function independently from in-laws or any other external circumstances.

Dropping deadlines means, both of you will be under the pump to put down a plan as to what needs to be done to clear out the existing muck and how beautifully you will create a loving environment for your baby to grow.

Not taking care of the baby or you, is not an option for him; but I guess it has become a convenient arrangement for him as you live with your parents and he does not need to take care of the fights and expenses as well.

This could only mean he is escaping reality and finding peace in avoiding it. Put him in the face of reality and that goes for you as well.

Being too accommodative can also become a habit where you rely on the comfort of what it brings to you; in this case the comfort at your parents' home.

For the sake of the baby, work together as a team and create a beautiful relationship; which will help the baby grow healthy, physically and emotionally.

All the best!

..Read more

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Sep 22, 2022

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Relationship
I am from Hyderabad. Age 40 years old . My name is XY and I’ve been married for 17 years. I have two boys. Ours is a love marriage.I felt like everything will be good and smooth but right after our elder kid was born my life changed. I am an MBA and several times I told my husband that I’d like to work. He said he’d help when the right time and opportunity comes. Until then I should nurture my kids as it's my responsibility and I should support him. But in the 2015, my kid noticed his chats with another lady. I was shocked because many times he’d refused sex with me. We’d get intimate maybe twice or thrice a year. I thought he was busy or maybe he doesn’t like my body. But when I caught him he said, what is over is over. Don't raise the topic. Leave me. I just kept quiet. He said what ever happened, I will be the same for my kids’ future sake. Many quarrels happened. But in 2020 his behaviour came to light. For example if I said anything, he'd punish me by not speaking to me for months. But he'd want me to wash his clothes and fulfil other necessities at home.Once I opened up and said I want to go for counselling. There he told the doctor, ‘She wants my property but she never allows me to care of my mom. She won't allow me to talk to my friends.’ I was shocked. I told him 'I never asked for money or property. I just want to quit.' I went home and told myself if he repeats this another time I won't take it for granted. But again in the month of February, he continued his behaviour. He shifted to another bedroom for a few months where he’d watch TV and have food. He'd even sleep in the kids’ bedroom. I stopped bothering. At some point, I felt like I deserved someone who trusts me.I want to quit because he thinks I am a loyal maid who will take care of kids and the household. He communicates with like ‘What I should get? Milk veggies etc?’ He never treats me with love and affection. Now everything is spoiled. I want to have a new life. I want to be set free from him. Please suggest what to do.
Ans:

Dear XY,

And may I ask what exactly are you waiting for?

Why did you think that by you going for counselling, your husband will change his behaviour towards you?

How is that he cheats on you and still you allow him to treat you this way?

This only shows that you have lost your strength which you need most right now.

What if you were a strong independent woman who has been working?

Would you still subject yourself to this? You know the answer!

Bring back that woman who had dreams, who knew how to walk the path, who knew how a man should treat her, who knew what a marriage really is.

Can you do this?

Your kids need their mother to stand up for herself and do the right thing.

Be the woman who will not settle for anything that disrespects a woman or another human.

Seeing this, they will also know how to treat a woman and what a woman can bring into their lives.

Do the right thing, for yourself and them. Bring back that strong, independent woman who knew this and more.

Best wishes!

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |645 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 30, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 05, 2024Hindi
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Relationship
Hi Dr. I am 27 year women with a 5 year old girl and 7 months pregnant. I was married 9 years ago. We faced many ups and downs in our life. Three years back , I went to dubai where my husband was working, to spend with him. But as a mobile addict , most of the time he will be on mobile when he was at home or sleeping. We spend little quality time . That too on my or my daughter's insist. Later I got job there as a teacher @ school . I worked there about two years when I got pregnant I return back to my home country. As he was resigned in search of better opportunity, even he is also with me in India now. He is short tempered and whenever he talks he raises his voice. For every single thing he is worried and shouting at me . It makes me feel sad. He is not bothered about my health and if I ask something like fruits to buy he will get angry saying that I am the one who is to manage the expenses and he can't afford buying things for me. He blames me for single thing. I need to ask permission for spending my money. He is in charge of taking care of my money. Main thing that I can't digest from his side is that he demands me to obey him like a slave. He says that how we are to the God , likewise you should obey and bear what ever from his side. Till that my love towards him isn't completed that is what he says. He never ever gives me a chance to explain or communicate my issues. Now I feel emotionally mentally very distant from him. I am staying at my home . Though his house is nearby mine, he rarely find time to visit me or call me. What should I do?
Ans: Your husband's behavior, as you've explained, reflects patterns of control and a lack of empathy for your well-being. Relationships thrive on mutual respect, open communication, and partnership, not dominance or one-sided expectations. The idea that you should obey him like a slave is deeply concerning and goes against the foundation of a healthy and loving relationship. His unwillingness to engage in meaningful communication or to show care during your pregnancy exacerbates the emotional distance you feel.

Right now, your primary focus should be on your mental and physical health and that of your children, both born and unborn. It's important to have a support system around you. Being with your family at this time seems like a good decision, as it gives you some space from the negativity and an opportunity to focus on yourself.

You deserve to feel heard, valued, and supported in your marriage. It's worth considering having a candid conversation with your husband when emotions are not heightened, explaining how his behavior affects you and the marriage. If he is unwilling to listen or dismisses your feelings, it may be time to consider seeking professional help, such as marriage counseling, where both of you can work on your relationship dynamics in a neutral and supportive environment.

If he refuses to engage in any efforts to improve the relationship or continues to demand unquestioning obedience without regard for your well-being, you might need to reflect on whether this relationship aligns with the life you envision for yourself and your children. No one deserves to feel like they are unworthy or diminished in their own home.

Remember, taking care of your emotional well-being is not just about your own happiness but also about creating a nurturing environment for your children. You are strong, and you have already shown resilience by navigating this challenging relationship and focusing on your responsibilities. Trust in your ability to make decisions that prioritize your dignity, health, and future. If you ever feel overwhelmed, consider reaching out to a counselor or therapist who can provide support tailored to your circumstances and guide you through these difficult emotions.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |645 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 09, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 07, 2025Hindi
Relationship
Hello Mentors, I'm 38 year old women, facing a toxic married life from past 10 years. I have a son who is 8 years old. I have lost my mom 8 years back n my dad 5 years back.I m d only child of my parents. I have done my MBA in HR n Marketing. Have done work before marriage, but after marriage things changes, my husband refused to allow me to work along with my in laws n he always behaves very badly with me insults me all time in front of my in laws too. He beats me every month still now also.I lost my mom she was suffering from cancer. Her cancer got detected when I was just 1 month pregnant, i m d one who takes care of her treatment taking her to chemo therapy n follow up with doctor, yes my dad was their with me, but he was also broke down as my mom was d back bone of my family. Inspite of my pregnancy I ran door to door of hospitals n doctors till I was stepped into 9 month of my pregnancy. My husband never supported me at that time too..Infact he n my mother in law's stated that if I'm enough for taking care of my mom then I must go to my doctor for my own check ups too...Yes I went for my usgs alone only at first time he went with me.. Now the main problem is he didn't changed at all he is repeating all his deeds infront of my child n my child is also following him from last 1 years, My son also said, if I scold him for his studies or food, he said what papa did is correct, it's good that he beats you, you leave our home this is not your home... My son loves me a lot that I know but he is just 8 n getting confused whom to follow...many a times he came to n said sorry for his bad behaviour but again if such incidents happens in front of him by his father again he changes his mind . My husband didn't give me a single penny, I take care of my own expenses from my house rent..( parental home as their is no one to stay now)..n it's d only source of income..though it's a very small amount.Even though he never helps me to take care of my baby ..He said if you want to work then put ur child into a hostel.. I took care of my home n child all alone..infact my in-laws are less bother about my child too... My son is deprived with every relationship of grand parents uncles n aunts.. My husband always demotivates me, mentally n physically abuse me n he also states that I'm an not an eligible person to became a good mom or even to get any job n all this infront of my child. I really want to get rid of him for d sake of my child n me too..I m totally into depression n lost all my confidence, I want to be financially free, when ever I want to file a divorce my son said no as he want both of us..for him only m dragging this bull shit relationship... N side by I'm looking for a job, but I have a big gap of almost 11 years now...M confused where to approach..n what should I tell to the employers if they ask for my career gap .m looking for a WFH as I dnt have any trust worthy person to take care of my baby...But m failed to find such. Please suggest me what should I do, how to take call on each of my problems.. I know d post is long...10 years is not a short time though..there is many many more to tell but I tried to keep it Short as much as i can . Thanks a lot ...
Ans: Your husband’s behavior is not just emotionally damaging—it is abusive. No one deserves to be insulted, beaten, or made to feel worthless, especially not in their own home. The fact that this is happening in front of your son makes it even more urgent to take action because, over time, he will normalize this behavior. Right now, he is torn between what he sees and what he feels for you, and that confusion is not his fault. But staying in this environment will only make it harder for him to understand what a loving and respectful relationship truly looks like.

You are already doing everything on your own. You are raising your child, managing expenses, and surviving in an environment that is breaking you down emotionally. Imagine if you put that same energy into building a life where you are free, at peace, and in control. I know the thought of divorce scares you because of your son, but think about what staying is teaching him. Children don’t just listen to words—they absorb actions. If he continues to see his father abuse you, he may grow up thinking that this is how men should treat women, or that love means suffering. You have the power to break this cycle for him.

Financial independence is your key to freedom, and I know the career gap makes you anxious, but don’t let it stop you. Employers today understand career breaks, especially when they are due to family responsibilities. Be honest but strategic—frame your gap as a time spent managing responsibilities, developing resilience, and handling real-life challenges. Highlight your past experience and any skills you’ve kept up with. Since you have an MBA in HR and Marketing, consider remote jobs in HR, digital marketing, content writing, or even customer support. Many women restart their careers through work-from-home opportunities, and platforms like LinkedIn, Naukri, and Remote.co have job listings specifically for career returnees.

You don’t have to do everything at once. Start with small steps. Reach out to women’s support groups or NGOs that help survivors of domestic abuse. Look for job training programs that help women restart their careers. If possible, find legal advice on your rights regarding divorce, alimony, and child custody. You are not alone in this, even though it may feel like it right now.

You deserve a life where you are respected, valued, and safe. You deserve to wake up without fear, to build a future where your son sees you as a strong and independent woman. Take this one step at a time, but take that first step. You have already survived the worst—now, it’s time to live.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 17, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 16, 2025
Relationship
Dear Anu, Am Shilpa,36 years old.Got married to a friend in 2015.It was a love come arranged.Initially married life was going smooth.I was working before marriage and due to marriage and relocation , discontinued the job. After marriage i started new job even though my husband was against it.Some misunderstanding started between us slowly and most of the adjustments were done by me to avoid fights.After 2 years we were blessed with a baby boy and i had to reluctantly and was also forced to quit job to take care of our kid.And i agreed and things went smoothly again for 3 more years.I got busy with my motherhood. I felt my husband was happy and was changing for the happy family. But i was wrong, he had a physical relationship with his ex college friend. They used to have sex in hotels. They even had sex chats and used to share nude pictures . This broke my heart completely and was disturbed mentally. I wanted to enquire my husband with all the proofs in my hand.without the proof he would prove me mentally retarded women. Initially he asaulted and abused me for blaming on him.But when he knew abt the proofs, he accepted and apologised for his mistake and begged me not to take divorce only for the sake of our son.Even i dropped the idea of divorce thinking the future of our son.Later few months he acted as if he changed himself completely but he always had disrespect on me and my parents. I even suffered domestic violence once which shattered me into pieces. Even then he apologised me and forced me to drop the idea of divorce. I again started to adjust and compromise with my life only because of my kid and his good future as all elders advice. This adjustments continued for few more months.But once i saw his ex girlfriend calls and daughter pics in his mobile, i was again mentally disturbed and after thinking many times, i made up my mind and left him without explanning him . I packed all my luggage and came to my parents with my kid. Now i got a job in which i opted work from home so that i can concentrate on my kid and support myself financially. Am trying to move on but my true love towards him is making it difficult. Please advice me on this Anu mam. The step which i took is right ? After seperation he is harassing me to visit son and kidnapped him 2 times. I really don't want to share my son with him.Please advice what should I do.
Ans: Dear Shilpa,
You have done what you needed to in order to protect your child and your sanity. Your husband could never get over his affair and he possibly won't. He maybe never even tried...

I firmly suggest you go to the cops so that he does not try to take the child away...Also, have you thought about a legal separation? That will offer you and your child enough protection and it will stop his harassment. This is not an easy decision to make BUT what choice is he leaving you with? Kidnapping the child? If by kidnapping you mean that he takes away the child without informing you, please watch out and contact a lawyer. A BIG BIG RED FLAG...Act soon...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1746 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 08, 2025

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10874 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 08, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 08, 2025Hindi
Money
Hi i am 40M. would request your help to understand what should be the corpus required for retirement as i want to get retired in next 3-5yrs. currently my take home is 2.3L monthly & my wife also works but leaving the job in next 2-3 months. we have a daughter 10yrs, currently i stay on rent and total monthly expense is 1.1L month. once i will retire we will shift in our own parental flat, where hopefully there will be no rent. current Investments 1. 50L in REC bonds getting matured in 2029 2. 42L in stocks 3. 17L in MF 4. 16L FD 5. 15L in PPF 6. 1.3L SIP monthly i do My Wife Investments 1. 30L corpus 2. flat with current value 40L and we get rental of 10K monthly. Please guide what should be the retirement corpus required combined to retire, assuming i need 75L for my daughter post grad and marriage and we would be requiring 75K monthly for our expenses after retiring
Ans: You have explained your income, goals, current assets, and future plans with great clarity. Your early planning spirit is strong. This gives a very good base. You can reach a peaceful retirement with smart steps in the next few years.

» Your Current Position

You are 40 years old. You plan to retire in 3 to 5 years. You earn Rs 2.3 lakh per month. Your wife also works but will stop working soon. You have one daughter aged 10. Your current monthly cost is around Rs 1.1 lakh. This cost will reduce after retirement because you will shift to your parental flat.

Your investment base is already good. You have saved in bonds, stocks, mutual funds, PPF, FD, and SIP. Your wife also has her own savings and rental income from a flat. All these create a good starting point.

This early base helps you plan stronger. It also gives room for more shaping. You are on the right road.

» Your Family Goals

You need Rs 75 lakh for your daughter’s higher education and marriage.

You want Rs 75,000 per month for family living after retirement.

You want to retire in 3 to 5 years.

You will shift to your parental flat after retirement.

You will have rental income of Rs 10,000 from your wife’s flat.

These goals are clear. They give direction. They allow a strong plan.

» Your Present Investments

Your investments include:

Rs 50 lakh in REC bonds maturing in 2029.

Rs 42 lakh in stocks.

Rs 17 lakh in mutual funds.

Rs 16 lakh in fixed deposits.

Rs 15 lakh in PPF.

Rs 1.3 lakh as monthly SIP.

Your wife holds:

Rs 30 lakh corpus.

A flat worth Rs 40 lakh with rent of Rs 10,000 each month.

Your combined net worth is healthy. This gives good power to build your retirement fund in the coming years.

» Understanding Your Expense Need After Retirement

You expect Rs 75,000 per month after retirement. This includes all basic needs. You will not have rent. That reduces cost. This assumption looks fair today.

Your cost will rise with inflation. So you must plan for rising needs. A strong retirement corpus must support rising cost for 40 to 45 years because you are retiring early.

An early retirement needs a large buffer. So you need safety along with growth. Your plan must include growth assets and safety assets.

» How Much Monthly Income You Will Need Later

Rs 75,000 per month is Rs 9 lakh per year. In future years, this cost can rise. If we assume steady rise, your future cost will be much higher.

So the retirement corpus must be designed to:

Give monthly income.

Beat inflation.

Support you for 40 to 45 years.

Protect your family even in market down cycles.

Allow flexibility if your needs change.

A strong retirement fund must support both safety and long-term growth.

» How Much Corpus You Should Target

A safe target is a large and flexible corpus that can support long years without running out of money. For early retirement, the usual thumb rule suggests a very high number. This is because you need income for many decades.

You need a corpus big enough to produce rising income. You also need a cushion for unexpected health costs, lifestyle shocks, and inflation changes.

Your target retirement corpus should be in a strong range. For your needs of Rs 75,000 per month and for goals like daughter’s education and marriage, you should aim for a combined retirement readiness corpus in the higher bracket.

A safe range for your family would be a very large number crossing multiple crores. This large range gives you:

Income safety.

Inflation protection.

Peace during market cycles.

Comfort in long life.

Room for daughter’s future.

Strong backup for health.

You are already on the way due to your existing assets. You will reach close to this range with systematic building over the next 3 to 5 years.

» Why You Need This Larger Corpus

You will retire early. That means more years of living from your corpus. Your corpus must not fall early. It must grow even after retirement. It must give monthly income and long-term family protection.

This is only possible when the corpus is strong and well-structured. A weak corpus creates stress. A strong corpus creates freedom.

Also, your daughter’s future cost must be kept aside. This must be parked in a separate fund. This must not touch your retirement money.

A strong corpus makes these two worlds separate and safe.

» Your Existing Assets and Their Strength

You already have good diversification:

Bonds give safety.

Stocks give growth.

Mutual funds give managed growth.

FD gives stability.

PPF gives tax-free long-term savings.

This blend is already a good start. But you need to make the blend more structured for early retirement.

Your Rs 1.3 lakh monthly SIP is also strong. It builds your future fast. You should continue.

Your wife’s rental income is small but steady. This adds strength.

Your combined financial base can reach your retirement target if you refine your allocation now.

» Your Daughter’s Future Fund Need

You need Rs 75 lakh for your daughter’s education and marriage. You should keep this goal separate from your retirement goal.

Your current SIP and future allocations should create a dedicated fund for this goal. A long-term fund can grow well when managed actively.

Do not mix this fund with your retirement needs. Mixing leads to shortage in old age. Always keep this corpus ring-fenced.

» A Strong Asset Mix For Your Retirement Path

A balanced mix is needed. You need growth assets to beat inflation. You also need stable assets for income.

You must avoid index funds because they do not give flexibility. Index funds follow a fixed index. They cannot make active changes in different markets. They cannot move to better stocks when markets change. They force you to stay in weak sectors for long. They also do not help you in down cycles because they cannot protect you by shifting to safer options. This can hurt retirement planning.

Actively managed funds are better because:

They give active asset selection.

They give scope for better returns.

They give flexibility to change sectors.

They give downside management.

They give access to a skilled fund manager.

They support long-term planning more safely.

Direct plans also carry risk. Direct plans do not give guidance. They do not give behavioural support. They do not give market timing help. They do not give portfolio shaping. They leave all the judgement to you. One mistake can cost years of wealth.

Regular plans with guidance from a Certified Financial Planner help you shape decisions. They help you remain disciplined. They help you avoid panic. They help you decide allocation changes at the right time. This saves wealth in long-term.

» How Your Investment Journey Should Grow in the Next 3–5 Years

Continue your SIP.

Increase SIP when your income rises.

Shift part of your stock holding into planned long-term mutual funds to reduce concentration risk.

Build a defined daughter’s education fund.

Keep a part of your REC bond maturity amount for long-term.

Avoid locking too much into fixed deposits for long periods.

Build a safety fund for one year of expenses.

This will create a full structure.

» Your Rental Income Role

Your rental income of Rs 10,000 per month is small but steady. Over time it will rise. This income will support your monthly cash flow after retirement.

You can use this for utilities or health insurance premiums. This gives a cushion.

» Your Emergency Buffer

You should keep at least one year of essential cost in a safe place. This can be in a liquid account or short-term fund. This protects you in shocks.

Since you plan early retirement, a strong buffer is important. It gives peace even in low months.

» A Structured Retirement Approach

A complete retirement plan for you should include:

A clear monthly income plan after retirement.

A corpus that can grow and protect.

A rising income system that matches inflation.

A separate daughter’s future fund.

A health cover plan for your family.

A tax-efficient withdrawal plan.

A market cycle plan to protect you in tough times.

This holistic approach keeps your family strong for decades.

» What You Should Build by Retirement Year

Your aim should be to reach a strong multi-crore range in investments before retirement. You already hold a large amount. You will add more in the next 3 to 5 years through SIP, stock growth, bond maturity, and disciplined saving.

Once you reach your target range, you can start the shifting process:

Move a part to stable assets.

Keep a part in long-term growth assets.

Create a monthly income strategy.

Keep a reserve bucket.

Keep a child future bucket.

Keep a long-term growth bucket.

This structure protects you in all market conditions.

» Final Insights

Your financial journey is already strong. You have a good income. You have saved well. You have multiple asset types. You have a clear timeline. And you have clear goals. This foundation is solid.

In the next 3 to 5 years, your focus should be on growing your combined corpus to a strong multi-crore range, keeping a separate fund for your daughter, reducing risk in unplanned assets, and building a stable long-term structure.

With the present path and a disciplined structure, you can retire peacefully and support your family with confidence for many decades.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

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Samraat

Samraat Jadhav  |2499 Answers  |Ask -

Stock Market Expert - Answered on Dec 08, 2025

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |10874 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Dec 08, 2025

Money
Hello my name is saket, I monthly salary is 43k and my saving is zero. My Rent is 15 k and 10 k i send to my parents. How can i save money and investments.
Ans: 1. Your Current Monthly Numbers

Salary: Rs 43,000

Rent: Rs 15,000

Support to parents: Rs 10,000

Left with: Rs 18,000 for food, travel, bills, and savings

You have very little room, but saving is still possible if done smartly.

2. First Step: Build a Small Emergency Buffer

You must build Rs 10,000 to Rs 20,000 emergency money.
This protects you from taking loans for small issues.

How to build it:

Save Rs 3,000 to Rs 5,000 every month in a simple bank savings account

Do this for the next few months

Don’t touch it unless truly needed

3. Create a Mini Budget (Very Simple One)

Try this split from the remaining Rs 18,000:

Daily living (food + transport): Rs 10,000 – 11,000

Personal expenses (phone, internet, basics): Rs 3,000 – 4,000

Savings + investments: Rs 3,000 – 5,000

If this feels difficult, reduce food/transport costs by small adjustments.

4. Where to Invest Once You Have Emergency Money

(For minors: This is general education. For actual investing, get guidance from a trusted adult or family member.)

After you build emergency money, start small monthly investing.

You can begin with:

Rs 1,000 to Rs 2,000 SIP in a simple, diversified equity fund

Increase the SIP whenever salary increases or expenses reduce

Avoid complicated products.
Keep it simple.
Focus on consistency.

5. Easy Practical Ways to Increase Saving

These small moves help a lot:

Avoid food delivery

Use public transport as much as possible

Reduce subscriptions you don’t use

Fix a daily expense limit

Keep a separate bank account only for savings

Even Rs 200 saved daily = Rs 6,000 monthly.

6. Increase Income Slowly

Try small income boosters:

Weekend tutoring

Freelancing

Part-time projects

Selling old gadgets

Learning new skills for future salary growth

Even Rs 3,000 extra income changes your savings life.

7. Build the Habit First

The amount doesn’t matter in the beginning.
The habit matters more.

Even saving Rs 500 every month is better than zero.
Once salary grows, you will already know how to save.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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