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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1654 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 24, 2022

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
AM Question by AM on Jun 24, 2022Hindi
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Relationship

 Hello!! I've been in a relationship since 13 years.
I'm a Christian and he is a Muslim. 
My parents don't agree to our marriage since beginning
I went many hardships to agree my parents. Recently they agreed..
My parents told him to bring his parents he declined
He is being offensive to bring his parents. He feels insecure when I talk to my own friends and even once I didn't cheat on him
He cheated me multiple times having sex with many other girls
He apologised and told me that he will not do it again
I trusted him again
He is not interested in bringing his parents to meet my family
What should I do now?

Ans:

Dear AM,

Imagine that all that you have shared with me is something that your friend is sharing with you.

What will you tell her? To forgive this person for their hurtful behaviour or to take charge of her life and do what’s right for her?

Have you thought of how much this must be messing with your mind and to not want to meet your parents with no real reason; is he even serious about the relationship?

And further complicate it by being with other women (I assume that this is something that you have evidence of) is disrespectful towards you and the relationship.

Doesn’t this prompt you to make a decision that brings back your peace of mind and allows you to be free to live life with more dignity and joy?

Be right by you and love yourself!

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Love Guru

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Relationships Expert - Answered on Oct 24, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Sep 16, 2024Hindi
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I am a Hindu girl and in a relationship with a muslim guy. Our relationship was going great but suddenly my boyfriend's family is forcing him to marry in a arranged marriage. I have told him to tell about us to his family and he is trying to but hasn't said yet. But due to his family pressure and my constant saying of marriage he gets irritated a lot. Now I'm feeling a little change in his behaviour also like he just try to skip discussion about future and marriage, also when I call him he is not talking nicely with me. I'm getting very emotional and hurt due to his behaviour. Also he has said that he will try his best to convince his family but now I'm not sure if he will take my stand or not. What to do now?
Ans: He sounds like a coward who will do as his family says. And I don’t think he intends to stick with you if they say no. Heck, I don’t think he plans on saying anything at all! If he loved you enough and had the gumption, he’d have taken a stand by now. I say drop him and move on. See what happens when you leave him; if he really does love you and want to be with you, he’ll take action. But unfortunately, from everything you’ve said here it sounds more like he’ll be relieved and go on to marry under an arrangement. If he does…don’t ever entertain any calls from him ever again. I’ve often heard of fools like him — no guts to marry the girlfriend, miserable in the arranged marriage six months to a year in, then re-establish contact with former girlfriend and have an affair, but no guts to end the marriage. In this whole scenario, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out who will be at the losing end — you! DROP HIM!

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |623 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 19, 2025

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hi sir im in a relationship with a guy who i met in hyd we have been together since one year he is a hindu nd im a christian we both love eachother and wanna marry but my parents r against it bcoz he comes from a hindu family and they r forcing me to get married to a christian guy i love him i never got love from my parents when he is giving me the love i want my parents have seperated me from him im not able to understand what to do plz help
Ans: Dear Niveditha,
It’s important to start by having an open and honest conversation with your parents. Try to understand their concerns and share your feelings with them. Express how much this relationship means to you, focusing on the love, respect, and support you and your partner share, rather than just the religious differences.

If this approach doesn’t work, consider involving a trusted family member, friend, or community leader who might help mediate the situation. Sometimes, having an external perspective can help bridge the gap between differing viewpoints. You should also reflect on the long-term implications of your decision. Think about whether you’re ready to face the potential challenges of a mixed-religion marriage, including societal pressures and family dynamics. Having in-depth discussions with your partner about these issues is crucial to ensure you’re both on the same page.

If your parents remain opposed, you may need to consider seeking counseling or therapy. A counselor can help you process your emotions and provide strategies for dealing with family conflicts. They can also offer guidance on how to communicate more effectively with your parents. Building a support system outside of your family, whether through friends, mentors, or support groups, can also be invaluable during this time. It’s important to have people who understand and support your decisions.

Ultimately, the decision about whether to continue with your relationship despite your parents' opposition is yours. You’ll need to weigh the emotional and practical consequences, including the possibility of estrangement or ongoing family conflict. It’s vital to prioritize your happiness and well-being. If you believe that your relationship brings you genuine love and fulfillment, standing by your choice is valid. However, be prepared for the challenges that may come and have a plan in place to manage them. This is a deeply personal decision, and whatever path you choose should align with what feels right for you and your future.

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |623 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 02, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 01, 2025Hindi
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Relationship
Hi sir/mam, Im a Christian girl, Ive been in a relationship for 4years with a hindu guy. He is a gud person and used to take a very gud care of me but he has anger issues. Once when we were having a dispute he msged my mom for the first time saying all negative about me and our relationship in anger with a video clip of ours. After he sended he inforeked me and asked forgiveness and i forgave him. My parents after seeing those msgs asked me the story and then made me call him. They talked and he said all lies about himself in fear of being filed a case on him by parents. And they didnt lyk this as they knew he was lying. After this i tried to convince my parents a lot by taking stand for him but there was no use as they needed answers from him but he was telling to talk to his parents and my parents didnt agree tht.. they had been doubting on him due to fear tht he may hurt me in future after marriage due to his msg. And in final ive asked him for some time but he says his father has fixed his marriage and has given 2 options, one is to get match fixed by my parents with his parents and second option is to marry the girl his father says. He doesnt want to come forward to talk to my parents to ask for me but he says me to convince my parents by myself to talk to his parents at any cost. But here my parents are not all agreeing to talk unless he shares his and his family's details with them and explains them about surity and safety of me and my family. What should i do in this situation, ive lost hope and not knowing wht to do.. i cant leave my parents and now how much ever i try to convince my parents they wont agree. Please tell me wht to do?
Ans: Let’s be honest. Your boyfriend made a serious mistake when he sent that message to your mother in anger — especially with a personal video clip. Even if he apologized later, that moment damaged more than just your parents’ trust — it showed that under pressure, he could act impulsively and without protecting your dignity. Now, when you need him to be strong, honest, and step forward like a man truly ready to marry you, he's stepping back and asking you to convince your family alone. That isn’t love backed by action — that’s love hoping to escape responsibility.

On the other side, your parents are not being unreasonable. They’re asking for basic accountability — that he take responsibility, that they get to know who he is and what kind of family he comes from. They're not making you choose a religion or forcing you into someone else's marriage — they're asking for respect and clarity, which is valid, especially after what happened. They're also trying to protect you because they saw him react in an unstable way once already.

Now you’re left holding all the emotional weight, trying to build a bridge between two sides that aren’t willing to meet halfway.

Here’s the truth: you cannot hold a relationship alone. If he wants you, truly wants to marry you, he should show the maturity and courage to meet your parents, take ownership of his mistake, and explain his family's intentions. If he's too afraid or unwilling to do even that, then you have your answer.

You don't need to make a decision right now. But do ask yourself: Is this the kind of support and courage you want in a life partner? Not just someone who says they love you, but someone who will stand for you when things get hard. So far, it seems like you’ve done all the standing.

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Nayagam P

Nayagam P P  |9394 Answers  |Ask -

Career Counsellor - Answered on Jul 25, 2025

Career
Sir I am a female candidate with crl 40984 in jee main and in csab councelling I might get chemical engineering in NIT nagpur or mechanical engineering in NIT calicut and cse in iiit like bhubaneshwar, kottayam, kota vadodara,Trichy what would be best to opt also I am getting Entc at Cummins women college in Pune so what should I do
Ans: Debanshi, Based on the following inputs/information, choose the most suitable option for you: Your JEE Main CRL 40 984 positions you within reach of several-branch programs via CSAB special rounds. Visvesvaraya NIT Nagpur’s Chemical Engineering under Home-State quota closed at a rank of 35 136, making it comfortably attainable. NIT Calicut’s Mechanical Engineering HS quota closed near 23 124, offering an even safer option for a core discipline. Among IIITs, CSE at IIIT Kota closed at 33 419, Electronics & Communication at IIIT Trichy at 42 139, CSE at IIIT Vadodara at 43 981, CSE at IIIT Bhubaneswar at 50 341, and CSE at IIIT Kottayam at 46 810—all within or near your rank band. Cummins College of Engineering for Women, Pune’s Electronics & Telecommunication program holds NAAC A-grade accreditation, NBA-accredited E&TC labs, an autonomous curriculum, strong research-active faculty, and an 86% average placement rate over the past three years, ensuring robust industry exposure and women-centric support.

Recommendation
Prioritise Chemical Engineering at VNIT Nagpur for its lower cut-off threshold and strong metallurgical and process labs; consider Mechanical at NIT Calicut next for its advanced CAD/CAM facilities and 90% placement consistency; Cummins College’s E&TC stands out with its women-focused environment, NBA-accredited labs, and consistent ≥85% placement rates; IIIT Kota’s CSE program offers intimate class sizes, AI/DS electives, and 82% placement; reserve IIIT Trichy’s CSE as a fallback, given its strong alumni network, hackathon culture, and 80% placement record. All the BEST for a Prosperous Future!

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