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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 30, 2023

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Rankanidhi Question by Rankanidhi on May 28, 2023Hindi
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Relationship

I am 71 male. About 40 years back when I was not in a permanent job, my boss tried to exploit and black mail me. Had he succeeded, I would have no choice but to commit suicide. Fortunately I survived and prospered in my career. My family life is also happy and my two sons are well placed. However I am unable to forget his treachery. I am always thinking of this incident. Is this a sign that I am having mental disorder for which I need treatment?

Ans: Dear Rankanidhi,
So, are you looking for revenge so that you feel satisfied?
Is it too hard to look at all the good things you have and the love that you are surrounded with?

Yet you choose to talk and live that one incident so much that it is forcing you to overlook even the best things in life. Yes, you are choosing it and you are choosing it for a reason.
Instead, can you dull it out and come into the bright phase that you are in? Cherish all that has happened and live every moment with your friends and family.

Life is how we choose it and we live that reality every moment...So, you don't have a mental disorder, it's just that that one instance (treachery, as you call it), is being allowed by you to have great prominence in your mind and what you allow in your mind will grow.

When the garbage can is overflowing at home, what do you do? Do you throw more and keep it around? Do exactly the same with that 'treachery' episode what you would do with an overflowing garbage can at home.

All the best!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 06, 2020

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Dear ma'am, I am going through a tough mental state right now. I do not know what state is this. It may be fear, lack of confidence or anything else. On 25th November 2019 I underwent surgery for anal fissure and piles. It took a long time to heal as I was suffering from constipation even after surgery. Every morning i would have a trauma like situation before going to bathroom. My stool would be hard enough to pass with blood both before and after surgery. I generally get nervous after seeing blood. In the meantime surgery has been healed. Even today I have constipation. I suffered from rhinitis like situation after surgery by consuming fruits and curd to make stool soft. feel difficulty in breathing With these medical conditions I developed a mental condition at which i always feel sick myself. No mood or energy to do anything. Fearing for life. When I wake up in midnight it gets very tough again to sleep. I sweat a lot. There is so much negative thought in my mind at night. I feel heavy in my head. I fear every sound I hear which disturbs and terrifies me. I consulted a psychiatrist 7 days ago; he told me that it is fear and lack of confidence. He has given me medicines to overcome fear. Kindly suggest ma'am at which state I am and help me. I am actually obsessed with my health and my life. Every moment I feel I would die. Nervousness grips me. I have lost weight of around 18 kg post surgery.
Ans: Dear BS, I can only imagine what you are going through and I truly hope that you feel better soon.

Fear is what can increase your physical symptoms and you will feel ill. Which is what is happening to you!

All the sounds and thoughts are a result of overworking the mind with your health and fearing the worst.

But do ask yourself: What if I have actually recovered? 

It will be good to know when this problem exactly began; what triggered it. If there is an event or a situation that caused it, then you know you might have to work on that.

Sometimes, fear makes children’s stool hard too and as doctors treat constipation, it is also necessary not to keep being fearful of it.

I know the surgery might have made it worse in the mind which is why I suggest start waking up every morning by believing that your surgery has worked and that you are fully recovered.

The simple belief instilled in your mind can work wonders by positively influencing your body to support your whole health. Also, calm the mind with meditation and exercises to keep the body supple and healthy.

To keep the stools soft, eat a lot of food that high roughage content. Slowly, you will see your mood and energy come back and feel a lot better.

All in all, believe that you are healing. Wishing you a wonderful health.

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 08, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 07, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
i am going through lot of depression and anxiety. It has made me violent. i feel like killing my father . he has done 2nd marriage and has kept no assets/property for me. I am worried someday i will take law in my hand and will be behind bars or may get injured in the fight. I am 41. From last 13 years staying away from family and living on my own. Presently my health is also not well, going through lot of mental and physical illness.after thinking about the future, I think I will be on streets in future and the reason is my *b**as**rd father. Please advise how do i control my anger and depression.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Focus on what you can control and manage and in your case, it's your anger.
It is destroying you and eating away your peace of mind.

Can you change the way your father is?
Is he going to transfer his property to you?
Why should he transfer what he has earned to you?
Are you not capable of standing on your feet?
What will you get by taking law in your own hands other than have a case against your name?
What is all this anger costing you healthwise?

You know the answer to each, but this anger and disappointment within is forcing you to blame your father (even if he solely to blame), but when you can;t do anything to change, that's the time to accept, else it has begun to destroy you.

Kindly work with an expert who can help you channel your anger into something more productive and in the meantime, focus on a lot of physical activities that help displace anger. Also spend time in Nature that helps you calm the mind. And yes, seek professional help NOW!
Best wishes!

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1318 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 21, 2024

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Hi I am very troubled with negative thoughts for quite sometime. Thoughts about putting someone down or any activity not going to go right or imaginary argumentative conversations leading to me showing down the other person keeps preoccupying my mind. Basically I am trying to show down the other person or situation and trying to win my hand or situation. It keeps me occupied majority of the time even when I am driving, taking a walk or running, eating, during meditation as well. For real events like if I have to go buy something, I imaging the seller cheating me, giving me faulty product or not charging me more etc., while in reality it may not happen and I will take a sigh of relief. I was not like this. I was a very happy, positive & optimistic as a child, throughout school, college, at work and used to be an inspiration to many. I think my ruminations have slowly commenced as I grew in age and slowly the positivity has lead to negativity & anger. I am in fifties now. I have been trying to practice Vipassana meditation, trying to get back to exercise but it is not helping. This has increase multifold as in my daily interactions, I always find people/friends poking fun of me and trying to put me down and I fight back even though knowing that it will be of no use. I am nice to my friends and people around me but they are not the same to me. Due to this I am beginning to reduce my interactions and get away from the abuse. Though I feel that I still look at everything in a positive light but the negative ruminations due to the everyday insults / slights have begun to bother me a lot and not able to have positive thoughts. Interaction with family is also suffering. Once upon a time I had many friends who I could talk to freely without prejudice but now I don't as most of them are not nice anymore even when I am very nice, positive & encouraging with them. I hope, I made some sense. Seeking help and guidance.
Ans: Dear Buddhu,
There's obviously something that has triggered you to think and act differently and that is not known here.
The best way I can suggest is: To start journaling. To write down the days events can help you decipher what's happening and what have been your reactions to events during the day. It will give you an idea on what to change.
Find and ways and means of replacing all the negative thoughts and actions during the day with something more useful. Soon, you will be in a place where journaling not only becomes a habit but also it will in a way guide you into meaningful ways during instances for the following days.
So, make that Journal your Guide.

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |1054 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Nov 21, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Nov 21, 2024Hindi
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Career
Hello, I am 3 yr neet dropper.in 2025 it will be my third attempt... I'm trying my best to crack neet ...i don't know what will happen will i score good marks or not ... please help me in suggesting good career options if not crack neet .....there are many options through neet marks also like bhms , veterinary...etc. i will also give entrance exam also like cuet ,gbpuat ,....but i want that what to choose which course will be best for me ...i want to make my life good and happy... having a good degree, good job ,...
Ans: Hello.
Have you analyzed your failure in 2 successive attempts in the NEET examination? If yes, then the question is what you have done for improvement and not then again the question arises why not? Here, I would like to suggest you focus now only on the NEET examination which is your 3rd attempt. Don't think about any other options right now till May 2025. After the NEET exam is over, you have ample time to explore the options available. Depending on your score in NEET 2025, we will guide you at that time. But yet, if you are confused, then looking towards your question and anxiety, you need personal counseling where you can express yourself face-to-face. Only after the NEET exam is over, you contact a counsellor for one-to-one counseling. Till then, keep mum and focus only on NEET. Take this exam as your mission and project. Work on this project, apply forces from all sides, success is there which is waiting for you eagerly.
Best of luck for your bright future.

Some tips: (1) Analyse separately Phy, Che, Bio (2) Prepare a list of hard topics (3) First focus more on the topics which are easy for you and then try to excel in hard topics (4) Appear more and more online/offline examinations (4) Prepare your short-cut file for all subjects (5) Prepare a file for each subject having only synopsis of all chapters (6) Try to solve the problems at the lightening speed and observe the period on regular basis (7) Create your time table to revise the topics on regular basis (8) Do not hesitate to ask your difficulties to your teachers, if you have joined to offline classes (9) Keep the habit of marking the answers which you know 100%. Don't guess the answers and mark them, as there is -ve marking scheme. (10) Be calm, quite, and smiling all the time to release the tension and always have a healthy chat with your friends.

If satisfied, please like and follow me.
If dissatisfied with the reply, please ask again without hesitation.
Thanks.

Radheshyam

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