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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1766 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on May 23, 2024

Anu Krishna is a mind coach and relationship expert.
The co-founder of Unfear Changemakers LLP, she has received her neuro linguistic programming training from National Federation of NeuroLinguistic Programming, USA, and her energy work specialisation from the Institute for Inner Studies, Manila.
She is an executive member of the Indian Association of Adolescent Health.... more
Asked by Anonymous - May 20, 2024Hindi
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Relationship

I am 67 yrs.old female staying with my husband.We have 2sons younger one is having problems with his wife right from the beginning of their marriage.They have a one year old daughter too.My son blames us for his problems as it was arranged marriage and doesn't talk to any family members.Once their fights led to preparation for divorce but at that point both decided to stay together and tried for child .Now the child is one year old but they behave same.This causes so much distress to me .Pl.help

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Arranged or Love marriage; the two people in the marriage are responsible for how and what they experience in it.
Kindly don't take the trouble of accepting the blame that very conveniently your son is transferring to you instead him taking charge of his marriage.
If it was the case that the marriage was going on wonderfully well, would he have applauded you for finding him a good bride? No, right? So, how is it that when things go downhill, he thinks he needs to pin the blame on you...
Kindly ignore; let him realize his duties as a responsible adult and a responsible partner and do the needful. Your job as a mother and mother-in-law is to support them through the process of them rebuilding their marriage.
And even in your conversations with them, if you hear him lashing at you, be absolutely silent on it (difficult but not impossible) and then ask: What is it that I can do to support the two of you?
It will give him the message that you area not going to take the blame and that you are passing the baton back to him to handle his marriage.
Every relationship issue must be dealt with by the people who are part of it as a stakeholder. The rest are support staff...

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

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Anu Krishna  |1766 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 19, 2022

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Hi Anu, I have been reading your articles for quite some time. I am 40 years old in a marriage for last 12 years. I have a 11.5 year old son.My marriage is going through a very rough phase. My husband doesn't leave any chance to abuse me, doesn't matter where and with whom we areMy husband proposed to me knowing I have Vitiligo (discoloration of skin). Plus I was not as rich as him. I did make him aware of this before going ahead. His family was against our marriage still he went ahead. From the day of marriage he suddenly changed, and started abusing me in and out. First I thought my mother-in-law is creating problems which she did every time we came together. Infront of every maid and in the absence of my husband she tried to humiliate me based on my skin condition and financial status. But she'd become caring in his presence.After five years of marriage, for a few years we were away from family. It was peaceful and we had a nice time. But during the lockdown and online school we were back with the same problem. Now the condition is that I cannot stay with my husband. My family is very supportive but suggest that before taking any step I should think of my child. And that we should both sit and talk.If I try talking to my husband I know it will end in a fight. Kindly suggest which way should I go?
Ans:

Dear KB,

Maybe someone from the family or his friends have commented on your condition and made him feel that he made the wrong choice.

Even if it’s that, when he knew and had no objection, what is a man’s word is that he keeps it no matter what!

Now that he has gone back on it, it’s natural for others to take advantage of it and mock you for what the society considers as ‘not beautiful’.

In a way, we are obsessed with some sort of standards for what’s beautiful and what’s not. Beauty standards, you might call it so!

He seems to be a different person with his family and without, it suggests that he may not have a very strong mind to back up the decision of marrying you in the first place possibly against the wishes of his family.

Abuse, at no point is justifiable and you need to take a strong stance and draw a boundary as this is going to continue.

Your family has made a wise suggestion and for the sake of the child, it might be worth the effort to sit down have that chat with your husband however hard that might be.

Do not compromise on the fact that this so-called beauty standards and labels within his family will continue. Be unapologetic about who you are and own your beauty your way.

This is non- negotiable and you need to state this clearly when you have that conversation with him. Period!

All the best!

..Read more

Dr Ashish

Dr Ashish Sehgal  | Answer  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 01, 2023

Asked by Anonymous - May 20, 2023Hindi
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Relationship
I'm 66 yrs old retired having two sons, both married according to their choice. My wife 60 going to retire in a couple of months. My elder son who is a Bank executive married since 10 years and issueless. The younger son working as an executive in KPMG married since 4 years and having a child. Due some misunderstanding with the their wives the sons are at times not in talking terms with us. My sons are also not in talking terms with each other. In the recent days the elder son directly instigated not to keep contact with the younger one because he did not like our closeness with him. We are put into dilemma and unable to convince both the children to reconcile the situation. Please advise.
Ans: I'm sorry to hear about the strained relationships between your sons and their wives, as well as the tension between your sons themselves. Here are some suggestions that may help:

Open and honest communication: Encourage open and honest communication between all family members. Try to create a safe and non-judgmental environment where everyone can express their thoughts, concerns, and feelings. Act as a mediator, actively listening to each party and facilitating productive discussions.

Family counseling: Consider seeking the help of a family counselor or therapist who specializes in resolving family conflicts. A professional can provide guidance and help navigate the complexities of the situation, facilitating healthier communication and promoting understanding among family members.

Individual conversations: Have one-on-one conversations with each of your sons to understand their perspectives and concerns. Encourage them to share their feelings openly and without interruption. This can help you gain insight into their individual experiences and provide a foundation for finding common ground.

Encourage empathy and understanding: Emphasize the importance of empathy and understanding in resolving conflicts. Help your sons and their spouses see things from each other's perspectives, fostering compassion and promoting reconciliation.

Promote shared experiences: Find opportunities for your sons and their families to spend time together in a neutral and relaxed environment. Encourage activities that promote bonding, such as family outings, celebrations, or vacations. Creating positive shared experiences can help rebuild connections and mend relationships.

Set boundaries: While it's important to encourage reconciliation, it's equally important to set and maintain healthy boundaries. Ensure that everyone understands the need for respect and mutual consideration, both within the family and between the spouses. Reinforce the importance of maintaining healthy relationships while respecting individual autonomy.

Lead by example: Show your sons and their spouses that you value and prioritize healthy relationships. Demonstrate positive communication, respect, and understanding in your own interactions with them and with your wife. Lead by example and encourage them to do the same.

Remember, resolving family conflicts takes time, effort, and understanding from all parties involved. It may be helpful to seek professional guidance from a family therapist who can provide tailored advice based on a deeper understanding of your family dynamics.

..Read more

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Anu Krishna  |1766 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Oct 22, 2024

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Anu Krishna  |1766 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Mar 03, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 26, 2025Hindi
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Relationship
My elder son is married for the last seven years. Every now and then they will quarrel and she will go to her parents place. Normally she used return after one or two weeks. About six months back she had a small quarrel with her husband and went to her parents' place. This time she has completely cut off from her husband. Her parents expressed their helpless in helping us. My son and his mother had gone four times to her house to bring her back. Out of frustration we sent a advocates notice. We and our son are not keen for divorce. Both of them are childless and are working. Kindly advise us what can be done?
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Let it be a matter that is sorted by only your son and his wife. It's their marriage and let them take the responsibility of putting it back together. As parents, sometimes the concern that you show can actually backfire depending on what exactly is irking the couple and their marriage.
It is going to be difficult for you and your wife to become silent spectators but at times it is better than intervening. They are adults who know what a quarrel can do; so let them figure out what to do after a quarrel. Let your son learn how he can manage the situation after a quarrel where his wife is able to access her mature side and talk things through rather than packing and leaving. I am sure you understand where I am going with this!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

..Read more

Latest Questions
Naveenn

Naveenn Kummar  |247 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner, MF, Insurance Expert - Answered on Feb 10, 2026

Money
Hi sir, I would like to invest in the market or bank or saving it on FD. Whatever way is possible. I want to save 1cr in next 5 years. As of now I don't have any saving yet. I will get 2l saving on my nemae in july. My month expenses is around 54k and my salary also 54 onlym currently I am filled with emis and some commitments till July 2026. I am thinking of buying a car and planning buy a home or build a home at native. This is possible only I will vwich the another company so that I will get a salary growth nearly 1lakh per month. So please give me some suggestions to investments ideas and marketing and savings and finance planning to afford the needed things.
Ans: Good aspiration, Ganesh.

However, at present your salary and expenses are almost equal, and you are still carrying financial commitments. So this is not the right time to explore investments or market exposure aggressively.

The ?2 Lakhs you expect in July should first be used to clear pending obligations. Any balance amount can be parked in a Fixed Deposit and treated as your emergency fund.

Once your commitments reduce and you are able to generate monthly surplus, you may start SIPs even with a small amount. Discipline matters more than size initially.

After you switch to a new company and income improves, do ensure you take:

A personal Term Insurance plan

A Family Floater Health Insurance policy

These protections should precede wealth creation.

Step-by-step progression will keep your finances stable and stress-free.

...Read more

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Naveenn Kummar  |247 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner, MF, Insurance Expert - Answered on Feb 10, 2026

Money
Sir, I have invested totally 4.83 L in SBI Contra regular fund through SIP since 2010 and the present corpus is 19.76L @ 16.49% XIRR. Now I want to redeem say 4L (1.25 L Capital gain + corresponding Principle investment) to take advantage of LTCG. If I re-invest the same amount immediately predicting the same NAV, is it affect on profit of the fund in future? Please suggest. With Thanks & Regards, S.Salvankar
Ans: Hello Mr. Salvankar,

You have built an excellent corpus over time. A 16%+ XIRR since 2010 reflects disciplined investing and strong fund performance.

Redeeming around ?4 Lakhs to realise ~?1.25L LTCG and utilise the annual tax exemption is a valid tax-harvesting strategy. If you reinvest the same amount immediately, even at a similar NAV, it will not affect your future wealth creation. Your market exposure remains the same, while your purchase cost resets higher, helping reduce future taxable gains.

Do ensure reinvestment is done promptly to avoid market movement gaps, though the long-term impact is minimal.

LTCG exemption applies only on gain, not withdrawal amount

Redemption must be calculated proportionately

Redeeming ?4L will overshoot tax-free limit

However, you may please consult your Chartered Accountant for specific tax implications and personalized advice before executing the transaction.

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https://members.networkfp.com/member/naveenkumarreddy-vadula-chennai

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Naveenn Kummar  |247 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner, MF, Insurance Expert - Answered on Feb 10, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 07, 2026Hindi
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Hi Sir, I am 55 years old women and want to start investing ₹45,000 per month through SIPs for the next 5 years. My aim is only capital growth and I am a moderate risk investor. I have not invested in any mutual funds yet. Please suggest: 1). How much should I invest in equity vs debt/hybrid funds 2). What type of mutual funds are suitable for my age and 5-year period 3). Whether investing in midcap/Flexicaps and Multicap funds is advisable for me I want a safe but growth-oriented investment approach. Thank you in advance for your valuable advise :)
Ans: Hello Madam,

Thank you for your query. Starting SIPs at 55 with clarity of purpose is a very sensible step.

Since your horizon is 5 years and risk profile is moderate, the focus should be growth with capital stability, not aggressive equity exposure.

Allocation guidance

Keep equity around 40–45% and the balance 55–60% in hybrid and debt funds. This helps participate in market upside while reducing volatility risk.

Out of ?45,000 SIP, you may broadly structure:

?18–20K in equity oriented funds

?25–27K in hybrid / debt funds

Suitable fund categories

Flexicap funds are appropriate as a core growth component.
Balanced Advantage or Dynamic Asset Allocation funds are ideal for automatic risk management.
Aggressive Hybrid funds add measured equity exposure.
Short duration or corporate bond funds provide stability.

Midcap / Multicap exposure

Flexicap is suitable.
Multicap selectively.
Pure midcap exposure should be minimal or avoided given the short tenure.

Return expectation

With this balanced approach, a realistic outcome over 5 years may be in the 8–10% range, offering growth without undue stress on capital.

In simple terms, your strategy should be balanced, diversified and stability-led rather than return-chasing.

Wishing you disciplined and confident investing ahead.please consult qualified mutual fund advisor on scheme and fund selection
Naveenn Kummar
Chief Financial Planner | AMFI Registered Mutal fund distributor , Certified Retirement Advisor
https://members.networkfp.com/member/naveenkumarreddy-vadula-chennai

...Read more

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Naveenn Kummar  |247 Answers  |Ask -

Financial Planner, MF, Insurance Expert - Answered on Feb 10, 2026

Money
Dear Sir, I'm 54-year-old and my sons are 23 and 21 years old. I would like to know, in SBI Life Policies / any other brand of Life Policies, Term Insurance and Health Insurance. At present, specifically what are the best beneficial wealth policies, Term Insurance and Health Insurance Vs PPF, Vs MF, vs. NPS v FD vs Trading in the Share Market including ETFs, as well as with Sudden Death Protection, which suits for me and my both son's age and all of three income sources, such as a salary of 6-8L /Annum. Pl. Elaborate on all these requests with PROS and CONS on each segment for three of us, including the retirement plan and policies/investments. Thanks, from Chennai (1st Feb 2026)
Ans: Dear Sir,

For your sons, the first priority should be a Term Insurance Plan. It provides immediate financial protection in case of any unforeseen event. Please avoid ULIPs, traditional or endowment policies at this stage. Their eligibility and cost structures are linked to income and long lock-ins, and returns are usually not efficient.

Since their age is very young, term insurance premiums will be much cheaper. You may opt for a policy term up to age 65 or 70. Avoid “Return of Premium” and limited-pay variants, as they increase cost without meaningful benefit.

Secondly, take Health Insurance early. A high base cover, even 1 crore or an unlimited restoration plan, will come at a very economical premium due to their age. This protects future savings from medical inflation.

Regarding investments, traditional avenues like PPF and Fixed Deposits provide safety but may not beat inflation over long periods. For retirement discipline, you may consider enrolling them in NPS and, if suitable, Atal Pension Yojana for additional pension layering.

Avoid active trading for now. Without experience, it can erode capital rather than build wealth.

Maintain at least six months of income as an emergency fund, parked in FDs or liquid mutual funds for quick access.

Parallelly, start SIPs in mutual funds to build long-term wealth systematically.

For a more customized allocation and goal planning approach, you may consult a qualified Mutual Fund Advisor who can structure investments based on income, risk profile and timelines.

Naveenn Kummar
Chief Financial Planner | AMFI Registered Mutal fund distributor , Certified Retirement Advisor
https://members.networkfp.com/member/naveenkumarreddy-vadula-chennai

...Read more

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Anu Krishna  |1766 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Feb 10, 2026

Asked by Anonymous - Feb 02, 2026Hindi
Relationship
I'm male on the verge of completing 32 years ... Doing currently md from prestigious medical college and completed my mbbs from topmost medical institute in india... I'm into relationship for almost about 5 years when se was 20 and I was 27 ... I know there is a age gap of 7 years but we never felt that there is a age gap between us.. currently her age is 25 years ... We both loved each other ... Her parents is very conservative and from orthodox family .. i know that majority have those mindset and I can't blame it by saying derogatory words like narrow mindset and very cheap thinking even in my family some members have conservative mindset ... So when I don't call my family members by using derogatory then why I am to use cuss words about them also... Khair ... Baat yeh tha ma'am aapse ki mere andar hichkhichat bilkul nhi h lekin bs thoda sa nervousness feel ho rha ki apni baat ko kaise samne rkhe ... Hm toh khud yeh chahenge ji woh bhi samay le apna kyuki apni ghar ki Lakshmi apni jaan se bhi pyari ladki ko kisi ko saupne ki baat h .. lekin hm dono different caste se h ... We both belong to obc but having different communities or caste whatever you say ma'am .. ma'am aapse bs yahi puchna chahte h ki aap hme kya suggestion de skti h agar dena ho toh... Apni kabiliyat pe bharosa h unko hm smjha skte h apni financial stability bta ke apne chizo ko honestly aur transparently rkhte hue lekin phir bhi halka sa dar lgta h ki kai woh na maane toh... Dhanyawad aapka meri baato ko padhne aur smjhne ke liye..
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Financial stability ho toh bahut kuch aasaani se suljhaaya jaa sakta hai.
Apni mann ki baat apne parents aur ladki ke parents ke saamne rakhna; ab ya toh maan jaayenge ya toh bawaal mach sakta hai...
Par agar aapko lagta hai ki koi bhi samasya saame aaye toh aap aur ladki dono milke suljhaa paaoge, toh befikr hoke unhe sab bataa dena. Kuch dino tak shaayad naarza bhi rahein, kabhi na kabhi maan jaayenge yeh mere maanna hai...par kuch aisi communities hoti hain jahaan doosre caste mein koi baat nahin uthaate shaadi ka. Mere sujhaav phir yeh hoga ki aap jisse bahut kareeb ho ghar mein unse pehle baat karein taaki koi toh hohga aapke saath...uske baad poori family ko is baat ka khulaasa karein...ladke wale ladki aur uske pariwaar ke baare mein janna chahenge toh yeh baat acche se jaan lijiye...
Dekhiye aage hota hai kya!

All the best!
Anu Krishna
Mind Coach|NLP Trainer|Author
Drop in: www.unfear.io
Reach me: Facebook: anukrish07/ AND LinkedIn: anukrishna-joyofserving/

...Read more

Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |11025 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Feb 10, 2026

Money
Dear Ramalingam Sir.......I had invested in the NFO (in February 2021) of SBI Retirement Fund. After completion of five year locking period in February, 2026, the Units will now be available/free, for redemption. The investment was aimed for long term to built up a retirement portfolio for my two children who works in private without any pension provision in their employment. This fund has so far given moderate returns during last five years. Please suggest whether I should continue the investment in the same above SBI Retirement fund OR to have better investment returns I may redeem existing single portfolio in above SBI MF and re-invest the redemption value in different category of Mutual funds with obvious goal of a long term investment of over 20-25 years, for a Gift to my two childrens. Diversification in different MFs will also facilitate to avail yearly benefit of long term capital gain on redemption and then re-investment. Please also suggest names of MFs in different categories. With Regards.
Ans: » Understanding your current retirement fund holding
– You invested in a retirement-oriented mutual fund in February 2021 with a 5-year lock-in
– The fund follows a hybrid structure, combining equity and debt for balanced growth
– Returns over the first five years have been moderate, which is not unusual for this category
– With the lock-in now completed in February 2026, you have full flexibility to continue or restructure

» Rechecking the goal and time horizon
– The objective is long-term wealth creation of 20–25 years for your two children
– Since your children work in the private sector without pension benefits, growth becomes more important than short-term stability
– Over such a long period, portfolios with higher equity orientation generally have better wealth-building potential

» Continue with the same fund or switch – how to think about it
– Continuing in the same fund offers familiarity and avoids any transition effort
– However, retirement and hybrid funds are designed more for stability and discipline than for maximum long-term growth
– With a long horizon ahead, relying on a single hybrid fund may limit return potential
– This is a good stage to reassess structure rather than judge only past returns

» Why diversification now makes sense
– Holding the entire corpus in one fund increases fund-specific and strategy risk
– Diversifying across multiple mutual fund categories improves consistency over market cycles
– It also allows flexibility in partial redemptions and tax planning in future years

» Suggested mutual fund categories for 20–25 year horizon
– Instead of remaining in a single retirement fund, consider spreading across:

Flexi-cap oriented equity funds for long-term core growth

Large and mid-cap oriented funds for stability with growth

Select mid-cap oriented funds for higher long-term potential

One balanced or aggressive hybrid fund for risk control
– This combination helps balance growth, volatility, and discipline over decades

» About naming specific mutual funds
– Fund selection should be based on consistency of investment process, fund management stability, and portfolio quality
– Chasing recent top performers or NFO themes is not advisable for such long goals
– A Certified Financial Planner usually shortlists schemes based on suitability rather than popularity

» Tax planning perspective
– Equity-oriented mutual funds allow long-term capital gains benefit beyond the holding period
– Using diversification, you may plan staggered redemptions over different years to utilise the annual exemption limit effectively
– This improves post-tax outcomes over time without disturbing the long-term goal

» How to execute the transition smoothly
– Avoid redeeming and reinvesting in a hurry based on short-term market movements
– If you decide to exit the existing fund, a phased approach can reduce timing risk
– Continue long-term SIP discipline in the restructured portfolio

» Final Insights
– Your original investment decision was sensible for discipline and lock-in
– With the lock-in completed and a very long horizon ahead, restructuring into a diversified, growth-oriented mutual fund portfolio is worth considering
– The focus should now shift from product label to portfolio design
– A well-diversified mutual fund structure held with patience can meaningfully support your children’s retirement needs

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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