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Sanjeev Govila | Answer |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner - Answered on Jan 23, 2024

Colonel Sanjeev Govila (retd) is the founder of Hum Fauji Initiatives, a financial planning company dedicated to the armed forces personnel and their families.
He has over 12 years of experience in financial planning and is a SEBI certified registered investment advisor; he is also accredited with AMFI and IRDA.... more

Question by A on Jan 06, 2024Hindi

Money

Hello sir I am 48 year old i have not invested in any savings as of now I want to start please help me I am a self employed

Ans: Certainly! It's never too late to start investing. Here are steps you can take to begin your savings and investment journey:

Emergency Fund: Start by building an emergency fund equivalent to 3-6 months of your living expenses. This fund provides financial security in case of unexpected expenses or loss of income.

Retirement Planning: Evaluate your retirement goals and estimate the amount you'll need. Consider options like Public Provident Fund (PPF), National Pension System (NPS), and systematic investments in mutual funds for long-term growth.

Debt Reduction: If you have high-interest debt, prioritize paying it off. Reducing debt can free up more money for investments.

Diversified Portfolio: Build a diversified investment portfolio that includes a mix of equity, debt, and possibly real estate based on your risk tolerance and financial goals.

Systematic Investment Plan (SIP): Consider starting a SIP in mutual funds. This allows you to invest regularly in a disciplined manner, benefitting from rupee cost averaging.

Insurance Coverage: Ensure you have adequate health and life insurance coverage. This protects you and your family from unforeseen medical expenses and provides financial support in case of any unfortunate events.

Professional Advice: Consult with a financial advisor. They can help tailor an investment plan based on your unique financial situation, goals, and risk tolerance.

Tax Planning: Explore tax-saving investment options like Equity-Linked Saving Schemes (ELSS) and other tax-saving instruments to optimize your tax liability.
Stay Informed:

Remember, it's crucial to align your investments with your financial goals and regularly reassess your strategy. Consult with a financial advisor to create a personalized plan that suits your specific circumstances and aspirations

DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information to be as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision.

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Omkeshwar Singh | Answer |Ask -Follow

Head, Rank MF - Answered on Sep 08, 2021

Question by Sandhya - Sep 08, 2021Hindi

Money

I am 45 years old. I have not done any investment yet. Can you please guide how I can start? I can invest upto Rs 5,000 monthly.

Ans: You may start with Axis ESG Equity Fund - Growth.

Ramalingam Kalirajan |7635 Answers |Ask -Follow

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 19, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 18, 2024Hindi

Money

Hi sir my age is 29 how to start in investment my one income 900 rupees I don't have any savings please help me how to savings stat and investment plans

Ans: It's great that you want to start investing and saving. With an income of ?900 per month, it can be challenging, but every small step counts. Let’s explore how you can begin saving and investing.

Understanding Your Current Financial Situation
First, understand your income and expenses. Track your monthly spending to identify areas where you can cut back. Even small savings can add up over time.

Setting Realistic Goals
Start with small, achievable goals. Aim to save a portion of your income each month. This helps build a habit of saving.

Creating a Budget
Track Income and Expenses

List all your monthly income and expenses.
Identify non-essential expenses you can reduce or eliminate.
Allocate Savings

Aim to save at least 10% of your income. With ?900, this means saving ?90 each month.
Emergency Fund

Build an emergency fund for unexpected expenses. Start small, aim for ?500 initially.
Saving Methods
Savings Account

Open a basic savings account. It’s safe and earns a small interest.
Recurring Deposit (RD)

Consider starting a recurring deposit with your bank. You can deposit a small fixed amount each month. It’s a disciplined way to save.
Basic Investment Options
Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs)

Start a SIP with as little as ?500 per month. Mutual funds have options for low initial investments. SIPs help in disciplined investing and can offer good returns over time.
Public Provident Fund (PPF)

PPF is a safe and long-term investment option. You can start with small amounts and increase contributions as your income grows.
Government Schemes
Pradhan Mantri Jan Dhan Yojana (PMJDY)

Open a Jan Dhan account. It offers no minimum balance requirement and other benefits like insurance.
Atal Pension Yojana (APY)

A pension scheme for workers in the unorganised sector. You can contribute small amounts to secure your retirement.
Increasing Your Income
Skill Development

Invest in learning new skills to increase your earning potential. Look for free or low-cost courses online.
Part-Time Work

Consider part-time jobs or freelancing to supplement your income. This additional income can boost your savings and investment capacity.
Discipline and Patience
Consistency

Regular saving and investing, no matter how small, will yield results over time. Be consistent with your contributions.
Avoid Debt

Avoid unnecessary loans or credit. If you must borrow, ensure you can manage the repayments.
Reviewing and Adjusting
Regular Review

Review your budget and savings plan regularly. Adjust your savings and investment as your income grows.
Seek Advice

Consult a Certified Financial Planner for personalized advice as your financial situation evolves.

Starting with a small income can be tough, but your determination to save and invest is commendable. Every rupee saved is a step towards financial security. Stay committed, and over time, you’ll see the benefits of your disciplined approach.

Conclusion
Beginning your investment journey at 29 with a limited income is challenging but possible. Start by creating a budget, saving consistently, and exploring safe investment options. Increase your income through skill development and part-time work. Regularly review your progress and adjust your plan as needed. Your commitment to saving and investing will pave the way for a secure financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in

Jinal Mehta | Answer |Ask -Follow

Financial Planner - Answered on May 20, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - May 18, 2024Hindi

Money

Hi sir my age 29 , don't have any savings sir how to start my savings and where please help me sir

Ans: Saving is very simple. Create a budget. Based on the budget see how you can increase your income or decrease your expenses. Both will result in savings. It is suggested that you save atleast 10% of your income.

Ramalingam Kalirajan |7635 Answers |Ask -Follow

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on May 23, 2024

Question by Dass - May 18, 2024Hindi

Money

Hi sir my age is 29 don't have any savings How to start savings one my income 900 rupees

Ans: It's commendable that you're keen to embark on your savings journey despite facing financial constraints. Let's explore practical strategies to kickstart your savings plan and build a secure financial future.

Understanding Your Financial Situation

Before diving into savings strategies, let's assess your current financial landscape and identify areas where you can optimize your resources.

Assessment of Financial Position:

At 29 years old and with an income of ?900 per month, you're at the beginning of your financial journey. It's essential to recognize your income level and prioritize prudent financial habits to lay a solid foundation for the future.

1. Budgeting Essentials:

Creating and adhering to a budget is fundamental to effective financial management, irrespective of income level.

Income Evaluation: Start by mapping out your monthly income sources, including salary, allowances, and any additional earnings.
Expense Analysis: Track your expenses meticulously to identify discretionary and non-discretionary spending categories. This will help pinpoint areas where you can cut back and redirect funds towards savings.
Prioritize Savings: Allocate a portion of your income towards savings as a non-negotiable expense. Even a modest amount can accumulate over time and contribute to your financial security.
2. Cultivating Saving Habits:

Inculcating disciplined saving habits is key to achieving your financial goals, regardless of your income level.

Start Small: Begin by setting achievable savings targets that align with your income and expenses. Even saving a nominal amount regularly can foster a habit of thriftiness and financial discipline.
Automate Savings: Explore options to automate your savings process, such as setting up recurring transfers to a designated savings account. This removes the temptation to spend and ensures consistent contributions towards your savings goals.
Track Progress: Monitor your savings progress regularly and celebrate milestones along the way. Seeing your savings grow can motivate you to stay committed to your financial objectives.
3. Exploring Income Enhancement Opportunities:

While your current income may be limited, exploring avenues to augment your earnings can bolster your savings potential.

Skill Development: Invest in acquiring new skills or enhancing existing ones that can increase your employability and earning potential. Consider online courses, vocational training programs, or freelance opportunities.
Side Hustles: Explore part-time or freelance gigs that complement your skills and interests. From freelance writing to tutoring, there are myriad opportunities to earn additional income outside of your primary job.
4. Seeking Professional Guidance:

Consider consulting with a Certified Financial Planner to devise a tailored savings strategy that aligns with your financial goals and aspirations. A financial planner can provide personalized guidance and recommendations based on your unique circumstances.

Conclusion

Initiating savings on a limited income may seem daunting, but with strategic planning, discipline, and perseverance, it's entirely achievable. By prioritizing budgeting, cultivating saving habits, exploring income enhancement opportunities, and seeking professional guidance, you can lay a strong foundation for a secure financial future.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in

Latest Questions

Ramalingam Kalirajan |7635 Answers |Ask -Follow

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jan 27, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 26, 2025Hindi

Money

I am 66 years old and retired and have one daughter married and well settled and has 2 children aged 5 years son and 3 years daughter. I have no liabilities and have a family income of Rs.3 lakhs per month thru rental. My monthly expenses is Rs 50 K per month and annual payments of medical, vehicle and property tax is Rs.3.25 Lakhs. I have direct equity invested around 1.2 CR and Invested in PMS now valued at Rs.85 Lakhs. I have plot valued at 1.6 CR and 2 independent house valued at 3cr. I have a commercial property which gives me above rental is valued at Rs.5 CR. Now kindly advise me how i should investment my earnings which will help my daughter and 2 grand children for for their future education. My above income is after paying the taxes to the government. I lead a simple life and travel every year 2 times.

Ans: Your financial position is strong with no liabilities.

Monthly rental income of Rs. 3 lakhs covers your expenses and lifestyle.

Monthly expenses of Rs. 50,000 and annual expenses of Rs. 3.25 lakhs leave ample surplus.

You have diversified assets, including equity (Rs. 1.2 crore), PMS (Rs. 85 lakhs), real estate (Rs. 9.6 crore), and regular rental income.

You lead a simple life, which allows significant potential for wealth accumulation and legacy planning.

Investment Goals
Your primary focus is to:

Ensure financial security for your family.

Support your daughter and grandchildren’s education and future needs.

Maintain sufficient liquidity for personal travel and unexpected medical costs.

Recommendations for Asset Allocation
1. Equity Investments
Your current direct equity portfolio (Rs. 1.2 crore) and PMS (Rs. 85 lakhs) are commendable.

Direct equity requires active tracking and expertise.

Shift part of your direct equity to regular mutual funds through a Certified Financial Planner.

Regular funds offer professional management and long-term growth.

Retain PMS if it meets your return expectations and aligns with your risk appetite.

2. Emergency Fund
Allocate 6–12 months of expenses to liquid funds.

This ensures liquidity for unexpected expenses or emergencies.

Investments for Daughter and Grandchildren
1. Education Fund for Grandchildren
Start investing in child-focused mutual funds for their education.

Choose regular funds through an experienced Certified Financial Planner.

These funds offer professional management and goal-based growth.

Systematic Investment Plans (SIPs) in equity funds can help accumulate the required corpus.

2. Legacy Fund
Invest in diversified mutual funds for wealth creation.

Choose a mix of large-cap, flexi-cap, and balanced advantage funds.

This portfolio can grow steadily while preserving wealth.

Real Estate Diversification
Avoid further investments in real estate.

Real estate is illiquid and challenging to manage during retirement.

Liquidate one property if diversification is needed.

Use the proceeds to invest in mutual funds or bonds.

Fixed Income Options
Consider investing in corporate bonds or debentures for steady income.

Choose bonds rated “AAA” for safety.

Avoid annuities as they provide low returns and limited flexibility.

Tax-Efficient Planning
Review tax-saving strategies with a Certified Financial Planner.

Equity investments (LTCG above Rs. 1.25 lakh taxed at 12.5%) are tax-efficient.

Ensure proper tax documentation for real estate and rental income.

Track PMS returns and tax implications yearly.

Liquidity and Annual Expenses
Set aside Rs. 25–30 lakhs in a liquid fund.

This covers your annual travel, property taxes, and medical expenses.

Keep medical insurance for yourself and your family updated.

Succession and Estate Planning
Create a will to ensure smooth asset transfer.

Include clear instructions for property distribution.

Discuss creating a trust for your grandchildren’s education and future needs.

Travel and Lifestyle Funding
Use rental income surplus to fund annual travel.

Avoid withdrawing from long-term investments for discretionary expenses.

Final Insights
You have built a strong financial foundation.

Focus on simplifying investments for better management.

Diversify and invest in professionally managed mutual funds.

Plan for family needs with a balanced approach to risk and growth.

Regularly review your portfolio with a Certified Financial Planner.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

Rajesh Kumar Singh |42 Answers |Ask -Follow

IIT-JEE, GATE Expert - Answered on Jan 27, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 26, 2025Hindi

Career

Sir I had filled my jee mains form with general category, my exams are done and I have my ews certificate with me so how can I change my category from general to ews. Please help

Ans: Chances are Slim,Approach exam controller with affidavit.

Milind Vadjikar |917 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 26, 2025

Question by Rocky - Jan 25, 2025Hindi

Money

I want to retire this year i m 43. My current corpus 1.3 crore mf , 34 lac pf, father house in tier 2 city. Own house in bangalore - 2 crore value, 25000 EMI home loan till 2030. Monthly expenses 50k. 1st son class 9, 2nd son nursery. Spouse is housewife. Can i retire?

Ans: Hello;

I do not think it is possible now.

Simply because your current corpus won't be able to generate a monthly income that can sustain your expenses and home loan EMI.

Ofcourse in addition to these you have to invest for higher education of your kids and provide them a decent lifestyle.

Education inflation in India is most frighteningly high.

Also need to keep some amount as emergency fund.

A thorough and detailed analysis of all aspects is essential before retirement decision.

Best wishes;
X: @ mars_invest

Milind Vadjikar |917 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 25, 2025Hindi

Money

I am a 30 year old freelance content writer. Me and my parents (a family of 3) have a total corpus of 1.1 cr invested only in FDs (no stocks or MFs). I have no plans on getting married and will explore spirituality in 2-3 years of time. Probably, at 33, I want to stop working and we three will rely solely on this 1.1 cr + some additions by me. Please guide if it is a feasible plan. How much more money should I add in the next 3 years for an early retirement at 33? We rely only on interest generated from FDs. Thanks in advance!

Ans: Hello;

My suggestion would be to add another 20 L to this corpus over 3 years.

Instead of FD you can buy your parents an immediate annuity for 1.2 Cr from a life insurance company.

This may involve GST payment but it will avoid FD renewal and interest rate risk.

You may opt for joint annuity for both parents with return of purchase price to their nominee(yourself).

After making the annuity for 1.2 Cr with GST, the balance amount may be retained in saving account as emergency fund.

Best wishes;

Milind Vadjikar |917 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 25, 2025Hindi

Money

I am 35 year old. My portfolio value is 45 lakhs. 35 lakhs in MF. 5 lakhs direct stocks. 5 lakhs in EPF + FD. I do an SIP of 1 lakh a month. By what age can I retire and how much corpus should I have. I have a 3BHK home worth 1 cr. Remaining loan to be paid is 35 lakhs.

Ans: Hello;

You may continue with the 1 L sip for next 15 years.

The home loan, in all probability would have been fully paid by then.

Also your sip and current corpus (MF+Direct stocks) may grow into a sum of around 6 Cr.

If you invest it in a equity savings type mutual fund and do a SWP at the rate of 4%, you may expect post tax monthly income of around 1.75 L.

Happy Investing;
X: @mars_invest

Kanchan Rai |507 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 26, 2025Hindi

Relationship

He ma'am, Me and my husband are of same age 35 and its been 5yrs we got married but we don't have physical relationship at all my husband says we don't have intimacy, I forced home to visit doctor and the blood reports says all okay, as per his saying cause I don't understand the medical terms much....but if everything is okay medically still he never tries to come closer earlier we tried but he use stop in between before having sex and run to washroom and sit there for long ...and this was becoming mystry for me,bi asked him he said everything is fine it will take time and everything will be fine earlier he use to use washroom for long but now he does not .....in expectation that things will become better I wasted my 5 yrs. As a person he is good but as a husband he is lacks i wated my carrier as I am not getting any job in perticular city, and with is I started feeling useless as I had dreamt of living peaceful and happy life with him but everything went wrong no love, no emotional support, no physical intimacy no carrier nothing. I shared this with my mother in law as he was behind me for baby so one day I told her that we don't have physical relationship so please don't expect baby he didn't believe me but later on she started believing but she didn't take any action she is quite...how will I survive in this environment when I don't have reason to live...my husband support my family financially and because of that I not able to take any step..I feel suffocated at my in-laws place, I don't like to stay there he just makes me happy by shopping, watching movies that it but is this enough for the happy relationship. I was so friendly with him that I said that let me know what there in your mind you don't like me he said no I like you...then I asked him then why you don't want to get physical I started getting self-doubt on myself, he said you don't respond while sex but you tell me in 5 years we hardly tried 6-7 time and I responded him but he use to run to washroom in mid of play what would I do then I tried giving him hints for having sex but he use to ignore now you say that in 5 yrs of period we didn't has sex then don't you think there's major issue and when I say we should visit doctor then he says I have medical proof that I am physically fine... coming on my MIL part she used our bedroom toilet though we have 2 washroom out is western so she uses ours so there is no privacy our bedroom is never locked because of my MIL when I Iock my husband gets early in morning and open the lock for my MI, please tell me is this right every now and then she comes in our room and interfere in our conversation, her this behaviour feels like she is insecure about his son as FIL is more...I discuss with my husband that atleast we should have our privacy so he says yes but take no action...he does commitment but never fulfills...basic expectations I have from him that if not physical then atleast spent time with me, let's go and explore place he says yes but never go, I agreed on every point I lived according to my MIL she is selfish instead of knowing all problem she just want fasting for his son, making food what he likes, doing puja for his son success...you tell me in return I am not getting anything still I kept on doing my best to prove best bshu and best wife but no good change... I going through anxiety, stress, depression because of this I lost my confidence, no carrier nothing....now I decided to look for job in other city and thing for my mental peace and become independent because staying with him in 5 yrs didn't bring good changes instead I lost myself in my making them happy...what should I do please help ...he say that I don't want weekend wife now you tell me why I not think of myself now he says, I want to stay with you but if there is not change after so many try then it's useless he always says will work this out but it never happened, I tried my best.now I said will look for job in other city and will meet in weekend spend time together, and I will be there in all your worst situation. But now I can be jobless and asking for money everytime from him....he thinks money is the solution for all.He says no weekend wife how long this will work then but he is not giving me any choice, he says though I want to stay with you but if weekend wife the seperation is only option no divorce but seperation please guide *regarding physical relationship, *regarding my MIL interference despite of knowing everything, no privacy, her insecurity *And my decision of taking job in other as I am not getting opportunity in same city, staying together is also brings no change. Pls suggest.

Ans: The issue with the lack of physical intimacy is not simply about the act itself; it represents a disconnect in your relationship. Your husband's avoidance of intimacy and his reluctance to fully address the matter, despite your efforts, suggest deeper underlying challenges—perhaps emotional, psychological, or situational. While you’ve already taken steps by opening conversations, it’s clear that progress has stalled because this isn’t something you can resolve on your own. A professional intervention, such as couples therapy or sex therapy, could provide a neutral ground to explore these concerns. Presenting this option to him as an opportunity to strengthen the relationship rather than assign blame might help him feel less defensive. However, his willingness to engage will be a critical measure of his commitment to addressing these long-standing issues.

The lack of boundaries with your mother-in-law is another significant stressor that’s undermining your marriage and your mental peace. A healthy relationship requires a sense of security and privacy, which has been compromised by her interference. While it’s natural to want to maintain respect within a family, your husband’s inability or unwillingness to enforce boundaries is enabling a dynamic where you feel powerless and overlooked. The fact that you’ve expressed your concerns and seen no action suggests that waiting for change may not lead anywhere. You need to clearly communicate to your husband that privacy is not negotiable for the survival of your relationship. If he continues to prioritize his mother’s comfort over your peace, it will remain a barrier to the intimacy and connection you’re seeking.

The decision to pursue a job in another city reflects your need to reclaim control over your life and mental well-being. This isn’t just about financial independence—it’s about rediscovering your sense of purpose and confidence after years of feeling stuck. Your husband’s opposition to the idea of a “weekend wife” underscores his resistance to change, but his reluctance to address the core issues in the relationship leaves you with no alternative. Staying in this environment without progress will only deepen your feelings of suffocation and self-doubt. Choosing to prioritize your career is not a failure of the relationship; it’s a necessary step to protect your own mental health. You’ve already demonstrated immense patience and effort over the past five years, and now it’s time to invest in yourself.

As a coach, I would encourage you to focus on actionable steps: seeking therapy for clarity, setting non-negotiable boundaries with your husband regarding privacy and mutual respect, and pursuing your professional goals with confidence. By stepping into a space where you feel empowered, you’ll be in a better position to assess whether this relationship can evolve into the partnership you deserve. It’s important to remember that you’re not walking away from the marriage by making these decisions—you’re simply ensuring that your needs and well-being are no longer sidelined.

Kanchan Rai |507 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 26, 2025

Relationship

He ma'am, Me and my husband are of same age 35 and its been 5yrs we got married but we don't have physical relationship at all my husband says we don't have intimacy, I forced home to visit doctor and the blood reports says all okay, as per his saying cause I don't understand the medical terms much....but if everything is okay medically still he never tries to come closer earlier we tried but he use stop in between before having sex and run to washroom and sit there for long ...and this was becoming mystry for me,bi asked him he said everything is fine it will take time and everything will be fine earlier he use to use washroom for long but now he does not .....in expectation that things will become better I wasted my 5 yrs. As a person he is good but as a husband he is lacks i wated my carrier as I am not getting any job in perticular city, and with is I started feeling useless as I had dreamt of living peaceful and happy life with him but everything went wrong no love, no emotional support, no physical intimacy no carrier nothing. I shared this with my mother in law as he was behind me for baby so one day I told her that we don't have physical relationship so please don't expect baby he didn't believe me but later on she started believing but she didn't take any action she is quite...how will I survive in this environment when I don't have reason to live...my husband support my family financially and because of that I not able to take any step..I feel suffocated at my in-laws place, I don't like to stay there he just makes me happy by shopping, watching movies that it but is this enough for the happy relationship. I was so friendly with him that I said that let me know what there in your mind you don't like me he said no I like you...then I asked him then why you don't want to get physical I started getting self-doubt on myself, he said you don't respond while sex but you tell me in 5 years we hardly tried 6-7 time and I responded him but he use to run to washroom in mid of play what would I do then I tried giving him hints for having sex but he use to ignore now you say that in 5 yrs of period we didn't has sex then don't you think there's major issue and when I say we should visit doctor then he says I have medical proof that I am physically fine... coming on my MIL part she used our bedroom toilet though we have 2 washroom out is western so she uses ours so there is no privacy our bedroom is never locked because of my MIL when I Iock my husband gets early in morning and open the lock for my MI, please tell me is this right every now and then she comes in our room and interfere in our conversation, her this behaviour feels like she is insecure about his son as FIL is more...I discuss with my husband that atleast we should have our privacy so he says yes but take no action...he does commitment but never fulfills...basic expectations I have from him that if not physical then atleast spent time with me, let's go and explore place he says yes but never go, I agreed on every point I lived according to my MIL she is selfish instead of knowing all problem she just want fasting for his son, making food what he likes, doing puja for his son success...you tell me in return I am not getting anything still I kept on doing my best to prove best bshu and best wife but no good change... I going through anxiety, stress, depression because of this I lost my confidence, no carrier nothing....now I decided to look for job in other city and thing for my mental peace and become independent because staying with him in 5 yrs didn't bring good changes instead I lost myself in my making them happy...what should I do please help ...he say that I don't want weekend wife now you tell me why I not think of myself now he says, I want to stay with you but if there is not change after so many try then it's useless he always says will work this out but it never happened, I tried my best.now I said will look for job in other city and will meet in weekend spend time together, and I will be there in all your worst situation. But now I can be jobless and asking for money everytime from him....he thinks money is the solution for all.He says no weekend wife how long this will work then but he is not giving me any choice, he says though I want to stay with you but if weekend wife the seperation is only option no divorce but seperation please guide *regarding physical relationship, *regarding my MIL interference despite of knowing everything, no privacy, her insecurity *And my decision of taking job in other as I am not getting opportunity in same city, staying together is also brings no change. Pls suggest.

Ans: The issue with the lack of physical intimacy is not simply about the act itself; it represents a disconnect in your relationship. Your husband's avoidance of intimacy and his reluctance to fully address the matter, despite your efforts, suggest deeper underlying challenges—perhaps emotional, psychological, or situational. While you’ve already taken steps by opening conversations, it’s clear that progress has stalled because this isn’t something you can resolve on your own. A professional intervention, such as couples therapy or sex therapy, could provide a neutral ground to explore these concerns. Presenting this option to him as an opportunity to strengthen the relationship rather than assign blame might help him feel less defensive. However, his willingness to engage will be a critical measure of his commitment to addressing these long-standing issues.

The lack of boundaries with your mother-in-law is another significant stressor that’s undermining your marriage and your mental peace. A healthy relationship requires a sense of security and privacy, which has been compromised by her interference. While it’s natural to want to maintain respect within a family, your husband’s inability or unwillingness to enforce boundaries is enabling a dynamic where you feel powerless and overlooked. The fact that you’ve expressed your concerns and seen no action suggests that waiting for change may not lead anywhere. You need to clearly communicate to your husband that privacy is not negotiable for the survival of your relationship. If he continues to prioritize his mother’s comfort over your peace, it will remain a barrier to the intimacy and connection you’re seeking.

The decision to pursue a job in another city reflects your need to reclaim control over your life and mental well-being. This isn’t just about financial independence—it’s about rediscovering your sense of purpose and confidence after years of feeling stuck. Your husband’s opposition to the idea of a “weekend wife” underscores his resistance to change, but his reluctance to address the core issues in the relationship leaves you with no alternative. Staying in this environment without progress will only deepen your feelings of suffocation and self-doubt. Choosing to prioritize your career is not a failure of the relationship; it’s a necessary step to protect your own mental health. You’ve already demonstrated immense patience and effort over the past five years, and now it’s time to invest in yourself.

As a coach, I would encourage you to focus on actionable steps: seeking therapy for clarity, setting non-negotiable boundaries with your husband regarding privacy and mutual respect, and pursuing your professional goals with confidence. By stepping into a space where you feel empowered, you’ll be in a better position to assess whether this relationship can evolve into the partnership you deserve. It’s important to remember that you’re not walking away from the marriage by making these decisions—you’re simply ensuring that your needs and well-being are no longer sidelined.

Milind Vadjikar |917 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 26, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jan 25, 2025Hindi

Money

1) I had taken an SBI Life Insurance Policy Retire Smart - LP policy for 5 Lakhs with @1 Lakh premium paid every year. 2) Policy was taken in February 2022, and it was given understanding that I can close the policy after 3 years - without penalty. 3) I had paid 3 Lakhs as premium in this policy and I dont know the present fund value 4) Kindly advice about decision to be taken for this policy after completing 3 years, ie after 11months. My Age is 52 years

Ans: Hello;

You have been misguided about features of this policy.

It is unit linked pension plan.

There is 5 year mandatory lock-in.

Please check with your insurer about net fund value as on today.

If you do not have any other pension provision then I suggest you continue with this plan.

But for this to work you have to hold it till maturity/vesting and then opt for pension.

Review the funds selected are in line with your risk profile and requirement.

Best wishes;
X: @mars_invest

Milind Vadjikar |917 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 26, 2025

Question by Vijayan - Jan 24, 2025Hindi

Money

Hi, My Age is 32 Have been working for the past 10 years in shipping and have been only investing aggressively. I have an Equity portfolio of 35Lks, FD's Worth 7.5lks, An apartment worth 40lks(20lks loan pending) generating rental of 15K per month, 3 plots total worth(80lks no loan), 2 shops worth 25lks(Rental generated 18K), Gold 1.5Kg, One more Apartment self occupied 70lks(no loan). I wish to retire at 35 and pursue my business in wholesale supermarket, I am married and with one kid, My Monthly Expenses comes to 80K to 1.2Lk(depends on some months), what approach should I have to generate this amount of money.

Ans: Hello;

How much capital you require for this business?

Do you plan to borrow or self finance this business?

You will have to ring fence your existing assets and passive income from the business volatilities.

Hope none of your existing assets will be offered as security for the loan.

Please reply on the points so as to advise you suitably.

Thanks;

Milind Vadjikar |917 Answers |Ask -Follow

Insurance, Stocks, MF, PF Expert - Answered on Jan 26, 2025

Question by anand - Jan 24, 2025Hindi

Money

i am 50 years old . my take home salary is 78 k per month my wife is working woman she is getting 35 k in hand two child age 9 yrs and 14 yrs suggest me the sip one time or monthly . moderate risk

Ans: Hello;

You may begin a monthly sip of 50 K in a equity savings type mutual fund with moderate risk rating.

Recommend you to step up the monthly sip by 5% every year.

This may grow into a corpus of 1.18 Cr after 10 years assuming modest 9% return.

Happy Investing;
X: @mars_invest

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DISCLAIMER: The content of this post by the expert is the personal view of the rediffGURU. Investment in securities market are subject to market risks. Read all the related document carefully before investing. The securities quoted are for illustration only and are not recommendatory. Users are advised to pursue the information provided by the rediffGURU only as a source of information and as a point of reference and to rely on their own judgement when making a decision. RediffGURUS is an intermediary as per India's Information Technology Act.

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