Dear sir, I am currently 45 and just off from my dependents i.e., my 3 sisters out of which 2 were expecting my help to settle on their life - both my sisters off from their burden to an extent as their son started working and daughters were married to a decent families. I helped them by helping on their studies, marriage of my niece and assisted my nephew to buy a property (provided the advance or initial payment of 4 lacs). I haven't saved anything for my kids yet except a house , some jewellery about 50 sovereign and 1/2 ground land. My sisters and mother doesn't feel complete but I have informed it is not happening because I need to looks at my 2 kids 11 and 6. Besides, my wife is super supportive and never disputes or raised concerns. The ask is I have been working since childhood like 16 so feeling tired at times so I am planning to start my own businesses but still I am feeling jittery as I didn't save much for their studies etc. I am working in ites services so I feel like that I have 5 years max ahead. No politics in the office but I am stuck with no major opportunities. Please guide me on how to put a perspective and lead a clear way ahead as I am totally confused to be honest. Thanks in advance and please write back as this is my second time asking for suggestions.

Ans: Dear AK, sadly, most of our lives are lived doing things for others.

Initially seeing the happiness on the faces of our loved ones makes us believe that what we are doing is the right thing.

But if you work or so anything in life without taking into consideration your feelings or your what you value for yourself, it will slowly start to seep into your core and you either end up feeling stressed or anxious.

I do understand that your situation is one of financial challenges, you mist work and why not work and at least set sometime for yourself over the weekend to rejuvenate yourself?

This time is non-negotiable and it is to refresh yourself so you can go back on Monday with a newness.

Also, instead of working like a machine, why not think that you are working efficiently to slowly pay off EMIs and to be free of them.

Bring some harmony between work and life which is what I can offer as a suggestion to you.

Be happy and work not out of compulsion but passion!

Ans: Dear Anonymous,
Let's accept that not all of us are born with a silver spoon and furthermore, we may always be at the losing end with core relationships as well...
At 48, do you want to go back in time and count all that went wrong, how unfair people and life was? Are you able to change anything? NO!

1. You cannot change your past but you can certainly change the way you feel about it.
2. The way you feel about your past is what will create your current reality. You can check with yourself; your present life is possibly filled with challenges and short-lived happy times. That is because you have chosen to play the VICTIM card even now. What happens in the past, stays there.
3. Why not instead laud your efforts at learning new skills at trading and expand your expertise through certifications and other forms of learning? This will not only help at work but will also teach you to look within yourself more.
4. I am unsure if your statistic of 5% is something that you have come up with enough research
5. Your parents did what they could and to accept it even if you feel unfairly treated is the only way you can move ahead

Choose: Play the victim of the past OR Play the creator of the present and future.

To choose the latter will mean. letting go of the past that you are holding onto? Are you ready to do this? I am sure you want to; who wouldn't want to create a better life for themselves?

All the best!

Ans: From what I read you have achieved a lot and have earned goodwill of your extended family. Please encourage your children to follow your family's example of a acquiring knowledge add gain success at work though a work ethic that appears to be your family's strong point. Given your current career use your strengths at work to grow even further and aspire to do well. Even though starting a business of your own may look exciting is not everyone's cup of tea, hence I would advise you to not jump into it without working out the full details.

Ans: Dear friend,

Firstly, let me commend you for your selflessness and dedication to supporting your family members. Your sacrifices and contributions have undoubtedly made a significant difference in their lives, and you should take pride in that.

Now, let's address your concerns about your own future and the well-being of your children. It's understandable that you may feel anxious about not having saved enough for their education and future needs. However, it's essential to recognize that it's never too late to start planning and taking steps towards securing their future.

Here are some steps you can consider to put things into perspective and chart a clear way forward:

Assess Your Financial Situation: Begin by conducting a thorough assessment of your current financial status. Take stock of your assets, liabilities, income, and expenses. Understanding where you stand financially will help you make informed decisions about your next steps.

Prioritize Your Goals: Identify your most pressing financial goals, such as funding your children's education, securing your retirement, and starting your own business. Prioritize these goals based on their urgency and importance.

Create a Financial Plan: Develop a comprehensive financial plan that outlines how you intend to achieve your goals. Consider factors such as budgeting, saving, investing, and risk management. A financial plan will serve as a roadmap to guide your actions and ensure you stay on track towards your objectives.

Start Saving and Investing: Begin setting aside a portion of your income towards your children's education fund and your retirement savings. Explore investment options that align with your risk tolerance and investment horizon. Consider consulting with a financial advisor to help you develop an investment strategy tailored to your needs.

Explore Entrepreneurship: If you feel inclined to start your own business, carefully evaluate the feasibility and potential risks involved. Conduct thorough market research, develop a solid business plan, and consider seeking mentorship or guidance from experienced entrepreneurs. Starting a business can be rewarding but requires careful planning and preparation.

Take Care of Yourself: Remember to prioritize your health and well-being amidst your responsibilities and aspirations. Take time to rest, recharge, and engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment. Your physical and mental well-being are essential for your ability to pursue your goals effectively.

Communicate with Your Family: Keep an open line of communication with your spouse and children about your aspirations, concerns, and plans for the future. Involve them in the decision-making process and ensure they understand the reasons behind your choices. Family support can be invaluable as you navigate life's challenges and opportunities.

In conclusion, while it's natural to feel overwhelmed by the uncertainties of the future, taking proactive steps towards financial planning and pursuing your aspirations can help alleviate some of that anxiety. Trust in your abilities, seek guidance when needed, and stay focused on your goals. Remember that each step you take today brings you closer to a brighter tomorrow.

Best wishes on your journey ahead.