We met through Arranged Marriage Platform & after a few Months of Courtship, we got Engaged & some Gifts were Exchanged between both Families. His Family never asked for any Dowry at all & my Fiance vehemently refused to accept any Dowry. I liked their Progressive Values. Our Wedding is Scheduled for February 2025. But, since the Tragic Case of Atul Subhash committing Suicide due to False Harassment Case by his Wife, has become a Sensation, my Fiance has been feeling quite Disturbed & Apprehensive. He has proposed that both of us Sign a Pre-Nuptial Agreement, wherein I & my Family Members would give a Written Declaration that there was absolutely No Dowry, Demanded by them or Given by us. And he also wants me to give it in Writing, that, in case, we have to get Divorced, I wouldn't be Demanding any Alimony from him (unless it's for the Maintenance of Children, if any). He has also proposed many other Clauses in the Agreement that describe in detail, how we would be Sharing our Finances, Assets & Liabilities and what would be done about our Joint Assets & Liabilities, in case of Divorce. He wants me to Refuse any Share of his Parental or Ancestral Property as he too wouldn't want any of my Familial Property. I feel that signing an Agreement of Divorce, before getting Married, is Inauspicious for our Marriage & I want our Marriage to begin with the Belief that it would last for a Lifetime, not like this. I have Discussed this with my Family Members & they are strongly advising me against Signing any such Agreement. But he insists that Signing this Pre-Nuptial Agreement is a Must, before we go ahead with the Wedding. He's not Pressurizing me & has allowed me ample Time to Think through it, Discuss & Debate over it with him & Family and also include any more Suggestions from my side, based on the Recommendations of my Family. He has been indirectly hinting that he may not want to go ahead with the Marriage, if I don't Sign the Agreement. Now I am in Dilemma. I Love my Fiance & his Family & I have the Faith that our Married Life would be Fairly Good, if not Wonderful. But I am skeptical about Signing the Agreement, please advise me.
Ans: Dear Anonymous,
I cannot make the decision for you, but I can tell you that his points are not invalid. They have been decent and what they are asking for is very basic. Please remember that this is just my opinion; you do not have to feel the same way. And there is nothing inauspicious about signing a prenup. Think of it like health insurance- when you get that, do you indirectly wish for health issues? No. It's just a precaution.
While the choice of signing any agreement is yours, he has every right to rethink the relationship in case you refuse to do so. It does not make him a bad person. He is merely looking out for himself and his family. Please take ample time to make a decision; if you are not comfortable with it, or you think signing the contract and going ahead with the wedding might cause friction between you two, please reconsider the relationship. But I want to remind you again, he is not in the wrong for taking precautions. It does not mean he thinks you are in it for the money; it just keeps the money away from the equation.
Hope this helps.