Need Expert Advice?Our Gurus Can Help

Nayagam P P |10854 Answers |Ask -Follow

Career Counsellor - Answered on May 28, 2025

Nayagam is a certified career counsellor and the founder of EduJob360.
He started his career as an HR professional and has over 10 years of experience in tutoring and mentoring students from Classes 8 to 12, helping them choose the right stream, course and college/university.
He also counsels students on how to prepare for entrance exams for getting admission into reputed universities /colleges for their graduate/postgraduate courses.
He has guided both fresh graduates and experienced professionals on how to write a resume, how to prepare for job interviews and how to negotiate their salary when joining a new job.
Nayagam has published an eBook, Professional Resume Writing Without Googling.
He has a postgraduate degree in human resources from Bhartiya Vidya Bhavan, Delhi, a postgraduate diploma in labour law from Madras University, a postgraduate diploma in school counselling from Symbiosis, Pune, and a certification in child psychology from Counsel India.
He has also completed his master’s degree in career counselling from ICCC-Mindler and Counsel, India.
... more

Asked by Anonymous - May 27, 2025

Hi everyone..I am Poornima kashyap currently studying in class 12. I am a humanities student with subjects- english, political science, maths, economics and psychology. I have developed anxiety because of my toxic family and i am not able to concentrate at all. I have no space to study. Earlier i wanted to pursue a career in psychology but now as i am studying it i am realising that it is not my cup of tea. I have no hopes about my life and future. I always had and still have a passion for travelling and want to get rid of this toxic family and house. Please somebody enlighten me or it will be difficult for me to even survive without a goal

Ans: Poornima, your struggles with anxiety and a toxic family environment are real and challenging, but you are not alone. Many students feel lost or hopeless in such situations. It’s important to reach out for help—school counselors, teachers, or mental health professionals can offer guidance and coping strategies, even if family support is lacking. Academically, your humanities background with maths and economics opens diverse career paths. Since you have a passion for travel and want independence, consider courses in hospitality and tourism management, travel journalism, international relations, or foreign languages. These fields can lead to careers that involve travel and personal growth. Look for scholarships or entrance exams that allow you to study away from home, giving you both space and new opportunities. Online courses and internships can also help you develop skills and confidence. Remember, your current circumstances do not dictate your future. Set small, achievable goals—such as preparing for college applications or learning new skills—that move you toward independence. Stay connected with supportive people, whether friends, teachers, or online communities. You have the resilience to overcome your current challenges and create a fulfilling, independent life. Take one step at a time, and don’t hesitate to seek help when needed.

Follow RediffGURUS to Know more on 'Careers | Health | Money | Relationships'.

CareerReply

You may like to see similar questions and answers below

Anu Krishna |1746 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 24, 2022

Question by AM - Jun 24, 2022Hindi

Hi Anu ma'am, I'm a class 12th JEE aspirant. Right now my life is actually seeming to be over. I have my board exams going on and JEE mains on head. The exams are not a problem but those expectations of performing good are. I've been a good student till now. Scored 96.6% in 10th and was always a sincere and obedient child. My father is an alcoholic and mother, a typical Indian housewife who is all nice, hardworking, busy with house chores, frustrated and tired all day. Before the pandemic life was much easier to me. I would go to school and forget all these problems with my family. Oh I didn't mention that my father sometimes turns abusive and beats my mother. I don't know how safe it is to share here but I wish to confide in you. So this pandemic ruined it all. I had to face the reality of my life at home. I couldn't join any coaching or tuitions as this is not that developed place. I had to manage my studies with all this stress. I kind of ruined all my progress and image as a decent performer in school. I would never in a million years blame my environment for this. My parents love me and always wish the best for me. But right now I'm scoring really low in boards as well as JEE mock tests. All this is breaking me. I always wished to study hard and explore a world outside this little, not so happy house. I don't know what I'll do if I don't get a good government school. I want to make things happy between my parents and maybe if I earn well, I can do something...I don't know what but seems like money can fix a lot of things. I'm really so depressed...I was on anti-depression pills but felt like not to continue them as they made me overthink more...I don't know why. Nowadays I would just go on and sit uselessly or sleep for the entire day as I just want it to get over. Nobody sees how sad I'm. My father is busy with his office work and mother is depressed and traumatized to some levels. I feel like I can't burden them with all this anymore. I talked to my father to get things healthy but he gets all angry and aggressive.... and I'm really weak to face that both mentally and physically. I really wish that you get time to write back to me. I really need some help. I read an article where you answered some queries and couldn't stop myself. I just want to see if it's actually over or I have anything still left in this world for me :(Thank you

Ans:

Dear A,

Thank you for reaching out.

My response will be out here and shared online but your name does not appear, so it will be strictly confidential.

Sometimes we get into situations that we obviously don’t want to be in; like I am sure you didn’t want to be in a place filled with doubts and anxiety.

But hey, do you realise what’s nice about you?

You have a trait that doesn’t believe in blaming her parents and indulging in self-pity. And that’s wonderful and you know why?

Because when you shift focus onto yourself, you start to step up and do something more useful like value and respect your own life.

So, why don’t you start with listing down all the things that you are good at.

Next, the way you used to study earlier was effective; bring that schedule and pattern of studying back.

Write down the goal/outcome clearly and put down steps to achieving it. Exams are just one part of your life and not your entire life.

As for improving your environment, all that you can do now is, fortify yourself from the heated debates and sadness and how?

By spending time with friends who support and care for you, listening to music, indulging in things that you love doing.

And lastly, smile a lot! It will make you feel wonderful from within.

Celebrate what you have and live that moment! And most importantly, love yourself and the rest will follow…

All the best!

Relationship

Anu Krishna |1746 Answers |Ask -Follow

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Dec 27, 2022

Question by S - Dec 27, 2022Hindi

Hi Anu, I'm here to let my feelings out. I'm 23 years old, working in IT. I have never been a person orientated towards studies not just now but even as a kid. I never knew that this would take a toll on my life like this. I'm. Not happy with my job. I'm not passionate about it. Clearly I'm not performing well. Neither am I trying to. It's been a long time since I felt like I have things in control. Right now I can't control myself, my feelings, my thoughts, my brain process. After the lockdown began I have totally lost everything that I was left with. It's been a very long time since I have been happy about what's happening in life. I don't know what to do. I was depressed for 3 years due to break up. I think meeting that person made my life upside down. It was a very bad influence on me. He was a narcissist. Which is what has made like this today I guess. I have nothing in control, I don't know if I'll be able to make things right in my life, if I'll ever be better again. There's too much confusion, fear, pain and sadness inside of me. I'm stuck in the same place for years now. I have no confidence to do anything. I don't believe in myself, I cannot talk to myself in a good way. If something wrong happens to me today, I accept it. I do not have the strength to fight against or for anything. I feel hollow. I feel like there is absolutely nothing inside of me left. I feel like there nothing I can do to make my life better. The solution to make this right for my family is to k*** myself. Because I don't see hope. Even though I have dreams, I don't believe in myself that I will be able to fulfil them. Because I don't have the spark of life in me. Everything inside me dead. I don’t know what to do. I don’t even know if you'll be able to help me. But I'm not able to deal with myself. The pity I have on myself. The disgust I have on myself.

Ans:

Dear S,

It’s like being unsettled has become a way of life. And you haven’t become aware that what you are living with in terms of uncertainty is mostly self-created.

You are seeing it with academics, work, relationships. It’s a pattern which must be broken provided you wish to see a massive change in your life.

Ask yourself:

1. What do I seek from life?
2. Where do I see myself in the professional space?
3. What do I wish for in a relationship/partner?

Now, check if your thoughts and behaviours align with what you wish for.

For eg: If you are looking at losing weight, if your behaviour is no exercise and reaching out for a midnight snack, you will never get to what you wish for.

So, if you want to feel more certain and have a certain level of wellbeing and grip in your life, you need to come up with some sort of fool proof plan and stick with it.

If you haven’t been very fine with academics, surely you can still put your best foot forward in your workplace taking more initiatives and thinking about how to grow there.

With relationships, start asking yourself, how can I add value to my partner?

It’s time you took responsibility for your choices and its results. So, if you want massive changes in the results, change the way you think and do things.

Am I getting through to you here?

Nothing is dead; you just have to inspire yourself to think and do different.

So, self-pity isn’t going to get you anywhere.

If he was a narcissist, good things didn’t work out…time to move on rather than make more excuses for your life not going anywhere.

Do you know now what you must do? Just Step Up!

Best wishes!

Relationship