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BE Electrical Graduate in Big 4 Can't Crack UPSC Due to Social Media & Porn Addiction: How to Break Free?

Inderpaul

Inderpaul Singh  |47 Answers  |Ask -

Leadership Coach - Answered on Mar 12, 2025

Major Inderpaul Singh (retired) served in the Indian Army for eight years.
In the year 2008, he moved to the corporate sector and worked with Century Plyboards for 14 years, specialising in people management and organisation improvement interventions.
He is currently employed as a partner with Amishrit Terrene Pvt Ltd, an IT solutions start-up located in Mohali, Punjab.
A certified life coach, he also helps students and individuals handle challenges in their personal and professional lives.
He holds a commerce degree from DAV College, Amritsar, and a post-graduate diploma in business administration from Symbiosis, Pune. ... more
Asked by Anonymous - Mar 07, 2025Hindi
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Hi I have completed BE Electrical and working in Big 4 as a executive. But right after securing admission in BE and introduction of smartphone in my life I got addicted to social media, porn, peer pressure. Due to which my life started moving downwards. I'm not able to achieve my goals, when I prepare my plans I'm not able to adhere to it strictly. I want to crack UPSC, can you suggest me things to improvise in my life to reduce my addictions and narrow down my routine to achieve my goals.

Ans: Hello
1. Make small positive changes as checking phone only once in 2 hrs, deleting non essential/distractive sites etc.
2. Stick to changes you make come what may - there is simply no substitute of discipline
3. Make small goals as studying for 45 mts or so on daily basis
4. Gradually keep improving positive things & reducing negative/distractive elements
5. As mentioned, consistency/discipline is a must
Hopefully you will see start seeing positive changes in your life
All the Best !!
Career

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Aamish

Aamish Dhingra  |15 Answers  |Ask -

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hello sir i am 17 year old girl i was a topper in class 10th after that i took dummy schooling plus online coaching in my 11th and 12th grade to prepare for neet but then i ruined my life completely by getting into social media and youtube addiction in 11th 1 used to spend 11hrs daily on social media my mental health was ruining i was having constant guilt and anxiety and then in 12th i did continued this routine until october my mental health was completely disturbed i dont have any friends i cant focus on studies my attention span is very bad i cant concentrate on my studies. i feel very bad for my parents they have told me to focus on my board and now my screen time is 3-4 hrs .i am trying to quit social media i have deleted instagram i cant delete youtube because i have to study but i cant study because of procastination now my boards are going on and i have completely ruined myself i dont think that i will be able to score more than 75 % in 12th .i scored 92 % in 10th .i feel bad for my parents they have very high expectation . i am loosing my mind day by day i dont know what to do .i am filled with all the negative thoughts .i have tried quitting social media or say dopamine detox but i have failed many times 13 -17 times .i cant fulfill my own promise which i made to myself .what should i do now?
Ans: You’re caught in a loop, but what matters is how you handle it now. Dwelling on guilt won’t change anything - your action will. Right now, your board exams need your full focus. Forget about NEET for now. Even if you feel unprepared, showing up and giving your best effort is non-negotiable. No excuses. Procrastination isn’t about motivation - it’s about discipline. Set a strict, no-negotiation study schedule. 50-minute study sessions, 10-minute breaks. Keep your phone away while studying. You say you can’t delete YouTube, fine. But are you willing to use it only for study-related content, with no loopholes? Your parents’ expectations are there, but for a moment, shift the focus—what does success look like for you? No overthinking. No self-pity. Just action. What’s one thing you can do right now to move forward?

Wishing you success,
Aamish Dhingra
ICF-PCC Certified Life Coach
Co-Founder, Cocoweave Coaching International, Delhi

..Read more

Inderpaul

Inderpaul Singh  |47 Answers  |Ask -

Leadership Coach - Answered on Mar 05, 2025

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Career
hello sir i am 17 year old girl i was a topper in class 10th after that i took dummy schooling plus online coaching in my 11th and 12th grade to prepare for neet but then i ruined my life completely by getting into social media and youtube addiction in 11th 1 used to spend 11hrs daily on social media my mental health was ruining i was having constant guilt and anxiety and then in 12th i did continued this routine until october my mental health was completely disturbed i dont have any friends i cant focus on studies my attention span is very bad i cant concentrate on my studies. i feel very bad for my parents they have told me to focus on my board and now my screen time is 3-4 hrs .i am trying to quit social media i have deleted instagram i cant delete youtube because i have to study but i cant study because of procastination now my boards are going on and i have completely ruined myself i dont think that i will be able to score more than 75 % in 12th .i scored 92 % in 10th .i feel bad for my parents they have very high expectation . i am loosing my mind day by day i dont know what to do .i am filled with all the negative thoughts .i have tried quitting social media or say dopamine detox but i have failed many times 13 -17 times .i cant fulfill my own promise which i made to myself .what should i do now?
Ans: Hello Zaira
Start with some steps as follows
1. 45 mts study window & then 5/10 mts break
2. Keep your phone off/locked and kept away during these 45 mts
3. Check phone only during scheduled breaks
4. Make notes & study from there rather than directly from online resources
5. Keep company with one or two focused students in your circle & interact regularly regarding studies etc.
Every time you feel the urge of going back to old ways, remind yourself of your immediate "Life Goals". There will be ample time for everything else later in life.
Remember there is no substitute for "DISCIPLINE" & that is the only way to reach your goals.
All the Best !!

..Read more

Latest Questions
Aamish

Aamish Dhingra  |15 Answers  |Ask -

Life Coach - Answered on Mar 19, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Mar 19, 2025Hindi
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I have 4+ years of experience in IT as a automation enginner and currently I am studying Mtech as integrated program along with my work. But it seems like the pressure on completion of lab, assignments, quiz, midsem and main sem is becoming a burden along with my current work life. Now I regret taking the decision of being a part of Integrated learning. Also I have signed an agreement that if I quit midway I have to pay 2.4lac. Currently I am in 1st semester and it is really a tough journey ahead. What should you think I do. Day by day I am losing motivation. Should I continue this journey or should I focus more on my work. Please help.
Ans: It sounds like you’re in a challenging phase, feeling stretched between your job and the demands of your M.Tech program. The pressure of assignments, labs, quizzes, and exams is making you question whether this was the right decision, and the financial penalty of quitting adds another layer of stress. But before making a decision, let’s take a step back and reflect.
What was your initial motivation for enrolling in this program? Was it career growth, a passion for learning, or future stability? Do those reasons still matter to you, or has your perspective changed? Sometimes, when we’re overwhelmed, we forget why we started. Reconnecting with that purpose can help clarify whether the struggle is worth it. Another important question is: What exactly is overwhelming you? Is it a lack of time, the workload, or the fear of burnout? If better systems were in place—like structured time blocks, prioritization, or external support - would it still feel unmanageable? It’s also important to define what success looks like for you. If you push through, where do you see yourself in two years? If you quit, what’s the alternative, and are you comfortable with the financial and career implications? Finally, have you explored all possible support systems - mentors, colleagues, or even university resources - to lighten the load?
Decisions like this aren’t just about choosing between two options; they’re about understanding what truly matters to you and what sacrifices you’re willing to make. Rather than focusing on whether you should continue or quit, ask yourself: What would make this journey easier? What changes, however small, could help you regain control? You don’t have to find all the answers today, but you do need to start asking the right questions.

Wishing you success,
Aamish Dhingra
ICF-PCC Certified Life Coach
Co-Founder, Cocoweave Coaching International, Delhi

...Read more

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