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विशेषज्ञ की सलाह चाहिए?हमारे गुरु मदद कर सकते हैं
Love Guru

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Relationships Expert - Answered on Sep 05, 2023

Love Guru has been answering relationship and romance related questions on Rediff.com for over 13 years. She won't mince words when telling you what the problem is and what you can do about it. If you want a fresh perspective from an unbiased, objective-thinking individual about your relationship woes, Love Guru could just be the person you need to need to hear from.... more
Asked by Anonymous - Jul 13, 2023English
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नमस्ते, मैं शादीशुदा हूं लेकिन नैतिक गैर एकपत्नीत्व के विचारों से जूझ रहा हूं। मुझे ऐसा लगता है कि शादी में मेरी शारीरिक ज़रूरतें कभी पूरी नहीं होंगी और मुझे सच में लगता है कि एक खुली शादी करना ठीक है, जिसमें मेरे जीवनसाथी की भी सहमति हो। मैं इस विषय को अपने साथी के साथ चर्चा में कैसे लाऊं बिना उस पर गैर-वफादार या प्यार में नहीं होने आदि का लेबल लगाए बिना?

Ans: यदि आप मेरी राय पूछ रहे हैं, तो मेरे लिए विवाह का अर्थ एक विवाह है; जो लोग खुले विवाह में प्रवेश करते हैं, उनके पास आमतौर पर ऐसा करने की पूर्व व्यवस्था होती है। और आप यह मान रहे हैं कि भविष्य में आप यौन रूप से संतुष्ट नहीं होंगे या यह आपकी वर्तमान परिस्थिति है? ऐसा नहीं लगता कि आपकी शादी को बहुत समय हो गया है। यदि आप अभी भी इसे आगे बढ़ाने पर तुले हुए हैं, तो शायद इसे अनौपचारिक बातचीत में उठाएँ और देखें कि आपका जीवनसाथी खुली व्यवस्था के बारे में क्या सोचता है - इसे सामने लाने से पहले आप एक चाहते हैं! मेरा अनुमान है कि वह इसके बारे में सुनकर बहुत खुश नहीं होगा!
Relationship

आप नीचे ऐसेही प्रश्न और उत्तर देखना पसंद कर सकते हैं

Anu

Anu Krishna  |1617 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Nov 16, 2022

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हाय अनु, </strong><br /><strong>मैं अपना नाम प्रकट नहीं करना चाहता। मैं शादीशुदा हूं और मेरे दो बच्चे हैं। <br />मेरी एक खूबसूरत पत्नी है लेकिन मैं हमेशा अन्य महिलाओं के साथ संबंध बनाने के बारे में सोचता रहता हूं। <br />मेरा कोई रिश्ता नहीं है लेकिन मैं भी अपनी पत्नी के प्रति वफादार रहना चाहता हूं। हमारी सेक्स लाइफ औसत है. </strong><br /><strong>हर दिन मैं यह सोचने से बचने की कोशिश करता हूं कि यह बेकार है लेकिन मैं ऐसा नहीं कर सकता। कृपया सलाह दें।</strong></p>
Ans: <p>प्रिय आईएस,</p> <p>हम जिस चीज़ से बचने की कोशिश करते हैं, हम उसी पर अधिक ध्यान देते हैं।</p> <p>शादी से बाहर रिश्ता चाहने का असली कारण क्या है?</p> <p>उन मुद्दों का सामना करने से भागना जो आपकी शादी में बाधा डाल सकते हैं और किसी बाहरी चीज़ को पकड़ कर रखना बहुत आसान और आकर्षक है। औचित्य शायद कई हों।</p> <p>क्या आपने और आपकी पत्नी ने भावनात्मक स्तर पर मुद्दों पर काम किया है।</p> <p>सेक्स विवाह का एक तत्व है, एकमात्र नहीं।</p> <p>हो सकता है कि वह आपसे भावनात्मक रूप से अलग महसूस करती हो, जैसा कि आप उससे शारीरिक रूप से अलग महसूस करते होंगे।</p> <p>चाहे जो भी हो, किसी अन्य व्यक्ति को शादी में लाने से कुछ हल नहीं निकलने वाला।</p> <p>लेकिन अगर आपने तय कर लिया है कि कुछ जटिलताएँ आपको नुकसान नहीं पहुँचाएँगी, तो यही वह चीज़ है जो आपको दूसरी महिला की चाह में पागलपन की ओर ले जा रही है।</p> <p>इसके बजाय, क्या आप वास्तव में विवाह के पुनर्निर्माण के बारे में सोच सकते हैं? निःसंदेह, चाहत का होना आवश्यक है अन्यथा यह एक निरर्थक प्रयास है।</p> <p>विवाह को सफल बनाने के लिए पति-पत्नी के बीच बहुत मेहनत और धैर्य तथा शांत समझ की आवश्यकता होती है। लापरवाही से एक व्यक्ति की शादी पर असर पड़ सकता है।</p> <p>तो, शायद यह वास्तव में उन सर्वोत्तम गुणों को सूचीबद्ध करने का समय है जो आप अपनी पत्नी में देखते हैं और ओह, हाँ, आप दोनों ने पहली बार शादी क्यों की, यह आपको देखने के लिए फिर से ऊर्जावान बना सकता है चीजें अलग और अधिक उपयोगी ढंग से।</p> <p>यह तथ्य कि आप अपनी पत्नी के प्रति वफादार रहना चाहते हैं, यह दर्शाता है कि विवाह में अभी भी बहुत प्यार और देखभाल है।</p> <p>कौन जानता है, जुनूनी विचार ख़त्म हो सकते हैं और अपनी शादी को एक और मौका दें। मुझे यकीन है कि आप जानते हैं कि यह उस अवसर का हकदार है!</p> <p>शुभकामनाएं!</p>

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Anu

Anu Krishna  |1617 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jan 08, 2024

Asked by Anonymous - Dec 27, 2023English
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पति/पत्नी की कुछ विनाशकारी मानसिकता के कारण मैं पिछले 12 वर्षों से यौन-रहित विवाह का अनुभव कर रही हूँ। बाहर सेक्स करने की कोशिश की लेकिन मुझे यह पसंद नहीं आया क्योंकि इसमें भावनाओं और सुरक्षा की कमी है। मैं आर्थिक रूप से भी वहन नहीं कर सकता। मैं अब 48 साल का हो गया हूं और वास्तव में मेरी क्षमताओं पर असर पड़ने से मैं निराश हो गया हूं, जिसका असर मेरे पेशेवर जीवन में भी दिखता है। उसे छोड़ नहीं सकते, उसे दोष नहीं दे सकते, उसे श्राप नहीं दे सकते क्योंकि हम दोनों एक-दूसरे से बहुत प्यार करते हैं। वो खुद ही मुझे सेक्स के लिए बाहर जाने को कहती हैं. उसे मनोचिकित्सक या परामर्शदाता के पास भी नहीं ले जा सकते क्योंकि वह इसके लिए विरोध करती है। वह डिप्रेशन में भी रहती थीं लेकिन खुद को सामान्य दिखाती थीं। वह काम कर रही है और स्ट्रेस फैक्टर भी है. अपने रवैये, गलतफहमी या सोच के कारण वह खुद भी खुश नहीं रहती। मैंने अपने लिए और उसके लिए भी डॉक्टर से परामर्श लिया है, लेकिन कोई फायदा नहीं हुआ क्योंकि वह क्लिनिक में नहीं आती है। मुझे लगता है कि मुझे अपने मनोवैज्ञानिक तनाव के लिए एक साथी की जरूरत है, लेकिन ऐसा नहीं है। मुझे लगता है कि मैं अंतरंग संबंध न रखने के लिए अभिशप्त हूं। फिलहाल मैं अपने काम में लगा रहता हूं और हस्तमैथुन के जरिए यौन सुख पाने की कोशिश करता हूं लेकिन बिल्कुल भी खुश नहीं हूं। मैं सेक्स की इच्छा को खत्म करने के लिए बधियाकरण के बारे में भी सोच रहा हूं। मेरे परिवार में गुस्से, शोर-शराबे आदि के कारण अच्छी बातचीत नहीं होती है। मुझे हमेशा यथासंभव शांत रहना पड़ता है। मुझे लगता है कि सभी झगड़े एक दिन खत्म हो जाएंगे लेकिन इसमें बहुत अधिक समय लग रहा है। क्या करें?
Ans: प्रिय अनाम,
मुझे आपसे सहानुभूति है; लेकिन आप किस समस्या को हल करने का प्रयास कर रहे हैं?
क्या आप अपनी शादी को फिर से स्थापित कर रहे हैं और अपनी पत्नी के साथ बेहतर तरीके से जुड़ रहे हैं या अपनी सेक्स लाइफ के बारे में शिकायत कर रहे हैं और सोच रहे हैं कि खुद को कैसे संतुष्ट करें?
यदि यह पहले जैसा है, तो इस बात पर ध्यान केंद्रित करें कि खुद पर उसका विश्वास पुनर्जीवित करने के लिए कैसे और क्या किया जा सकता है... यदि परामर्शदाता काम नहीं कर रहे हैं, तो आपको रिश्ते को वापस पटरी पर लाने की ज़िम्मेदारी लेनी होगी, लेकिन उसे यह भी बताना होगा कि उसे भी ऐसा ही करने की जरूरत है। उसे यह भी अवगत कराया जाना चाहिए कि प्रयास उसकी ओर से भी होना चाहिए। यह एक कठिन काम है लेकिन मैं इस बात पर जोर दूँगा कि अपनी शादी को पटरी पर लाने पर ध्यान केंद्रित करें। यह निराशा पैदा किए बिना आपकी ऊर्जा को बेहतर ढंग से निर्देशित करेगा।
कौन जानता है...जब चीजें बेहतर होंगी, तो वह और आप वास्तव में अपने यौन जीवन को भी पुनर्जीवित करने में सक्षम हो सकते हैं।

शुभकामनाएं!

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Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |604 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 29, 2025
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Dear Ms Rai, I'm engaged to a guy my parents introduced me through an arranged marriage set up. Initially, everything seemed fine, but over the last few months, I've noticed that my fiance only discusses physical intimacy, which is making me uncomfortable. I have tried to tell him but I don't feel an emotional connection with him. I am hesitant to express this to my family or his. How should I approach this situation?
Ans: What you're experiencing is more common than it seems, and your discomfort is not just valid — it's important. A marriage, especially one that begins through family arrangements, needs far more than surface compatibility or physical interest. You deserve emotional connection, mutual respect, and a safe space to be heard and known deeply — not just desired physically.

The fact that your fiancé focuses primarily on physical intimacy while you’re still seeking emotional grounding raises a significant concern. It’s not about being shy or conservative — it’s about emotional safety and trust, which are foundational. If you're already feeling a disconnect or pressure now, it’s unlikely things will magically fall into place after marriage.

You’re not obligated to silence your discomfort for the sake of avoiding conflict. Start by being honest with yourself: Is this the kind of connection you want for life? If the answer is uncertain, it’s better to pause than to proceed out of pressure.

You don’t have to go straight to your family or his with everything. Start by writing down how you feel and what you’re afraid of. Then, speak to someone you trust — maybe a sibling, cousin, or a therapist — someone who can help you reflect calmly. If you feel strong enough, you can then have a direct and respectful conversation with your fiancé. Ask him what he expects in this relationship beyond the physical, and express clearly that you’re looking for a deeper bond, not just intimacy.

A marriage can be postponed or even reconsidered, but a life spent in silent emotional disconnect can weigh you down. You are not being unreasonable — you’re being honest and self-aware. That’s the best foundation for any life decision.

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Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8889 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 10, 2025
Money
Prabhu Asked on - Jun 09, 2025 Hi sir, I'm 39 working with MNC with take home 1.4L. Kindly advice 2 thing. Shall I close the loan with PPF and does my investment are on right way. Investment 30L ESOP 30L MF 15L PPF ( matured) 25K yearly in ulip for 20 years stared in 2022. 12K SIP Liabilities 20L home loan ( 9 yr completed) 30K expenses monthly 21K health insurance yrly 40K term insurance yrly
Ans: You are 39 years old, working with a multinational company. Your take-home income is Rs. 1.4 lakh per month. You are asking two questions:

Should I close my home loan using my matured PPF?

Are my investments on the right track?

Let us evaluate both in a detailed and professional manner. We will look at your finances from a full 360-degree view to help you take better decisions.

Present Financial Snapshot
Let us understand your current assets and liabilities first:

Take-home salary: Rs. 1.4 lakh per month

Home loan outstanding: Rs. 20 lakh (9 years completed)

Monthly EMI (assumed): Not mentioned, but likely Rs. 20,000–25,000

Monthly expenses: Rs. 30,000

Health insurance premium: Rs. 21,000 per year

Term insurance premium: Rs. 40,000 per year

SIP: Rs. 12,000 per month

ULIP: Rs. 25,000 per year (started in 2022 for 20 years)

PPF: Rs. 15 lakh (matured)

Mutual funds: Rs. 30 lakh

ESOPs: Rs. 30 lakh

Let us now analyse both your questions step by step.

Should You Close Home Loan Using PPF?
You have completed 9 years of a housing loan.

Only Rs. 20 lakh is left as balance.

PPF has matured and holds Rs. 15 lakh.

Your PPF is a safe and tax-free investment.

You should not use the full amount to close your home loan.

Here is why: Home loan gives tax benefits on both interest and principal.

It also helps you build your credit history.

Your EMI seems comfortable at Rs. 20,000 to Rs. 25,000.

Your net monthly surplus is very good after expenses and SIP.

Do partial prepayment of home loan only.

Use Rs. 5 lakh from PPF to reduce your loan balance.

This reduces your interest burden.

Keep Rs. 10 lakh in PPF for safety and emergencies.

Don’t close full loan now.

If you reduce loan tenure (not EMI), it saves more interest.

This way, you reduce interest and still keep benefits.

Don't touch the rest of PPF.

It can also act as emergency fund in job break, health issue or family need.

Full closure of home loan is not necessary if EMI is manageable.

Should You Continue or Surrender the ULIP?
You are paying Rs. 25,000 per year in a ULIP since 2022.

ULIPs mix insurance and investment in one product.

In the first few years, most of your money goes in charges.

They are very costly, and the returns are unpredictable.

You already have term insurance for pure protection.

ULIP is not needed.

You can surrender this policy immediately.

Reinvest the amount in mutual funds through SIP or STP.

This way, you get better returns with lower costs.

ULIP does not offer flexibility or goal matching.

Mutual funds give transparent performance tracking.

Avoid mixing insurance with investments in future.

Is Your Investment Strategy on the Right Path?
Let’s analyse your current investment portfolio from all sides.

1. Mutual Funds – Rs. 30 lakh

This is a strong amount for your age.

You are running a SIP of Rs. 12,000 monthly.

This shows discipline and long-term thinking.

Try to increase SIP yearly with salary hike.

Aim for Rs. 20,000 to Rs. 25,000 SIP monthly in next 2 years.

Invest in actively managed funds, not index funds.

Index funds only copy the market and don’t give extra return.

Active funds have fund managers to help beat inflation.

Also, avoid direct plan funds if used.

They may look cheaper, but offer zero guidance or review.

Use regular plan via Certified Financial Planner (CFP).

This gives ongoing support, rebalancing, and handholding.

Review your MF portfolio once in 6 months.

Keep mix of large cap, flexi cap and mid cap funds.

Avoid small cap if your goals are short term.

Long-term goals should drive your MF selection.

Keep 1 goal for each MF. Example: Retirement, freedom, child, etc.

This brings clarity and emotional discipline.

2. ESOPs – Rs. 30 lakh

ESOPs can create sudden wealth but are high risk.

They are linked to one company, your employer.

This is called “double risk”.

If your job and stock both go down, you face double pain.

Keep ESOPs within 20% of your total portfolio.

You already have Rs. 30 lakh in ESOP, and Rs. 30 lakh in MFs.

That’s a 50-50 split now.

Start selling some ESOP every year.

Move the money into mutual funds or debt funds.

This reduces risk and adds diversity.

Also, check tax rules before selling ESOPs.

Avoid waiting for maximum price or market timing.

Take money out slowly over 2–3 years.

Don't link your wealth to one company stock.

3. PPF – Rs. 15 lakh (matured)

You have done very well by holding PPF till maturity.

PPF is one of the best low-risk options in India.

Use only part of it for loan prepayment.

Keep balance for emergencies or future needs.

You can also open a new PPF again.

This helps save tax under Section 80C.

Use PPF as a safety cushion, not for aggressive growth.

4. SIP – Rs. 12,000 monthly

SIP is a good habit for wealth creation.

Increase it step by step every year.

Add Rs. 2,000–3,000 more every 6 months.

Your current income allows higher SIP.

But maintain balance between investing, EMI, insurance and life needs.

Insurance Coverage Assessment
1. Health Insurance

You are paying Rs. 21,000 per year.

Check if the cover is at least Rs. 25 lakh floater.

If not, take a super top-up plan.

Health expenses are rising faster than income.

Good insurance protects your savings and wealth.

2. Term Insurance

You are paying Rs. 40,000 yearly.

Ensure cover is 15 to 20 times your annual income.

Your income is Rs. 16.8 lakh yearly (1.4 lakh x 12).

So, term cover should be at least Rs. 3 crore.

If current cover is lower, take an extra policy.

Term plans are cheap and pure protection.

Don't delay increasing your coverage.

Suggestions for Future Financial Growth
Track your net worth every 6 months.

Maintain a monthly budget sheet to manage expenses.

Avoid luxury spending from bonuses or incentives.

Don’t buy any new real estate for investment.

Real estate locks money and gives poor flexibility.

Avoid F&O, crypto, or stock tips from social media.

These look exciting but destroy wealth silently.

Stick to your own goals and asset allocation.

Write your goals on paper – with amount and time.

Example: Rs. 2 crore for retirement by age 55, Rs. 40 lakh for child.

Link each investment to one goal.

This gives emotional connection and purpose.

Stay patient during market ups and downs.

Don’t stop SIPs during market fall. That’s when you get more value.

Meet a Certified Financial Planner every year to review.

Life changes. So should your plan.

Finally
Do not close your entire home loan using PPF.

Do partial prepayment with Rs. 5 lakh only.

Keep Rs. 10 lakh from PPF as emergency buffer.

Surrender your ULIP and shift to mutual funds.

Increase SIP step by step.

Reduce ESOP exposure to avoid risk.

Review term and health insurance coverage immediately.

Maintain goal-based investing using active mutual funds.

Avoid direct and index funds.

Keep meeting Certified Financial Planner every year.

This builds financial freedom, not just wealth.

You are already on a strong path. Just refine it smartly.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Money
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8889 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 10, 2025
Money
Sir i have 14 lacs in savings account and have a emi of 65k for 80 lacs loan at the moment. How much should i invest and how much to should i prepay my loan.
Ans: You have Rs. 14 lakh in your savings account. You are paying an EMI of Rs. 65,000 for a home loan of Rs. 80 lakh.

You want to know how much to invest and how much to prepay.

Let us do a complete 360-degree analysis.

We will keep the answer simple, but give deep insights for better decisions.

Understand the Current Picture
You have Rs. 14 lakh in savings account.

You are repaying Rs. 65,000 EMI monthly.

You have a large home loan of Rs. 80 lakh.

Most likely, your home loan tenure is 15 to 20 years.

The loan interest in initial years is mostly high.

Savings account gives very low returns.

Keeping too much idle in savings hurts your money.

A good balance is needed between safety, growth, and EMI relief.

Emergency Fund Comes First
First step is to check your emergency fund.

You should always keep 6 months of total expenses aside.

Include EMI, household costs, child fees, medical, etc.

If total monthly cost is Rs. 1 lakh, emergency fund must be Rs. 6 lakh.

If it is Rs. 1.3 lakh monthly, keep Rs. 7.5 to 8 lakh minimum.

This should be in FD or liquid mutual fund.

Do not invest or prepay using this portion.

Emergency fund is your shield against sudden shocks.

Only the extra amount beyond this can be used.

How Much to Prepay from Rs. 14 Lakh?
Once emergency fund is set aside, you are left with Rs. 6 to 7 lakh.

Home loan prepayment in early years saves a lot of interest.

Especially if your interest is above 8.5%, prepaying is smart.

Use a portion of the remaining money to prepay the loan.

But do not prepay everything. You also need investments for future goals.

So, use about Rs. 3 to 4 lakh for home loan prepayment now.

This reduces your loan balance and total interest outgo.

You also keep flexibility for future EMI relief if needed.

How Much to Invest from Rs. 14 Lakh?
After emergency fund and prepayment, you may have Rs. 3 to 4 lakh left.

You can invest this in mutual funds for long-term wealth.

Do not invest in lump sum fully in equity funds.

Invest this balance using STP (Systematic Transfer Plan).

First park the money in a liquid fund.

From there, shift Rs. 25,000–30,000 monthly into equity mutual funds.

This keeps risk lower and avoids market timing mistakes.

Choose good actively managed mutual funds.

Avoid index funds. They don’t perform better in Indian markets.

Index funds just copy the market. They don’t beat it.

Active funds are managed by experts and often give better returns.

Invest through regular plan via MFD with CFP guidance.

Avoid direct funds. They look cheaper, but offer no support or correction.

MFD with CFP gives you regular portfolio review and changes when needed.

Maintain Monthly SIP Discipline
Do not stop your monthly SIPs if already running.

If you are not doing SIPs yet, start one now.

Even a small SIP of Rs. 10,000 to 15,000 is powerful.

Link your SIPs to long-term goals like retirement, child future, freedom fund.

SIPs give you cost averaging, which beats market ups and downs.

Over 10 to 15 years, SIPs create strong wealth.

As your income grows, increase SIP amount yearly.

This is how wealth is created in real life – not through lottery or quick trades.

Benefits of Balanced Approach: Prepay + Invest
Let us now understand the real benefit of splitting your Rs. 14 lakh.

Emergency fund gives peace of mind.

Prepayment reduces your interest burden.

Investment gives your money a chance to grow.

This is how financial maturity is built.

You don’t put all in one basket.

You don’t lock all money into property.

You also don’t risk all into market.

You keep liquidity, reduce debt, and grow wealth side by side.

Bonus Tip: How to Review Loan Prepayment Plan
Check with your bank if there’s a cap or condition for partial prepayment.

Ask if you can reduce EMI or reduce tenure after prepaying.

Reducing tenure is better than reducing EMI.

Lower tenure saves more in total interest.

Check your home loan schedule every year.

If you get bonus, gift, or extra income, do small prepayments.

This will cut years off your loan.

But never sacrifice your emergency fund or investments for prepayment.

Your financial freedom is more important than just closing the loan.

Other Suggestions to Strengthen Your Financial Life
Ensure you have a term insurance equal to at least 15 times your annual income.

Ensure you have a family floater health policy for Rs. 25 lakh or more.

Keep an excel sheet to track all EMIs, SIPs, insurance, expenses.

Every 6 months, check your net worth.

Use surplus funds wisely, not for lifestyle inflation.

Do not break investments to repay loans in future.

Always separate your emergency, investment, and EMI money.

Meet a Certified Financial Planner once a year to check your plan.

This keeps your wealth engine tuned and moving forward.

Stay away from quick-money ideas like F&O, crypto, penny stocks.

These destroy wealth and create stress.

Follow a steady plan. Wealth builds slowly but surely.

Finally
You have Rs. 14 lakh in savings. This is a strong position.

Use Rs. 6 to 8 lakh to build or top up your emergency fund.

Use Rs. 3 to 4 lakh for home loan partial prepayment.

Use Rs. 3 to 4 lakh for mutual fund investing with SIP or STP.

This 3-way plan gives you safety, EMI relief, and growth.

You reduce loan burden without losing future opportunities.

You stay ready for emergency and invest for long term.

This is the smartest use of lump sum money.

Build on this foundation with monthly SIPs, yearly reviews, and steady savings.

This way, you achieve freedom, not just debt closure.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Money
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8889 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 10, 2025
Money
I am 32, earning Rs 2 lakh per month with a home loan EMI of 57,000 and education loan EMI of 11,000. I send 30,000 to my parents in Indore. I've been investing 20,000 monthly in SIPs across largecap and flexicap funds. I recently received a 5 lakh annual bonus. Should I use it to prepay my home loan or invest in SIPs for better long-term growth?
Ans: You are 32 years old and already earning Rs. 2 lakh monthly. That’s a strong start. You're managing Rs. 57,000 home loan EMI and Rs. 11,000 education loan EMI. You send Rs. 30,000 to your parents monthly. You also invest Rs. 20,000 SIP in largecap and flexicap funds. You have now received a Rs. 5 lakh bonus.

You want to know whether to prepay your home loan or invest this Rs. 5 lakh in SIPs.

Let us analyse both options step by step, from a full 360-degree perspective.

We will look at all angles and give you a practical plan.

Understanding Your Current Monthly Flow
Monthly income is Rs. 2 lakh.

Home loan EMI is Rs. 57,000.

Education loan EMI is Rs. 11,000.

You send Rs. 30,000 to your parents in Indore.

You invest Rs. 20,000 monthly in SIPs.

Your fixed monthly outgo is Rs. 1.18 lakh.

So, you are left with Rs. 82,000 monthly.

You need to manage your rent, food, travel, savings and other expenses from this.

It shows that your finances are stable and under control.

You also have discipline in investing regularly.

Receiving Rs. 5 lakh bonus gives you a chance to fast-track your goals.

Thinking About the Home Loan
Home loan EMI is Rs. 57,000 per month.

Most home loans run for 20 years.

The interest outgo is very high in early years.

Prepayment in early years reduces interest greatly.

Prepayment does not attract any penalty in most home loans.

But if you claim full home loan interest benefit under Section 24, check tax impact.

Full deduction up to Rs. 2 lakh per year is allowed.

If you prepay too much, you may lose some of this tax benefit.

Also, home loan gives long repayment term. That gives cash flow flexibility.

So, we need to evaluate if locking bonus into prepayment is the best use.

Education Loan Angle
EMI of Rs. 11,000 is small compared to income.

Education loans give tax benefit under Section 80E.

You get deduction for interest paid. No cap for years if loan is in active status.

But the benefit continues only for 8 years from start of repayment.

Also, education loan interest rate is often higher than home loan.

If your education loan is old and at high interest, partial repayment makes sense.

Otherwise, it can be kept as is if affordable.

Benefits of Mutual Fund SIPs
You already invest Rs. 20,000 in mutual funds monthly.

This is a very good habit.

Largecap and flexicap funds are balanced choices for long-term wealth.

These funds can grow faster than loan savings, over long time.

But mutual funds are volatile. They carry risk in short term.

SIPs work well if invested for 7 years or more.

For long-term goals like retirement, child’s future, or financial freedom, SIP is better.

But lump sum investment must be done only after risk review.

What Is the Best Use of the Rs. 5 Lakh Bonus?
Let us look at multiple good ways to use this bonus.

We will evaluate each angle separately.

Option 1: Use Full Bonus to Prepay Home Loan
You save a large amount in total interest over time.

It reduces EMI burden or shortens loan term.

You reduce stress in monthly cash flow in future.

But the money gets locked in the house.

You cannot access it in an emergency.

It does not grow in value.

It gives guaranteed savings, but not wealth creation.

If you have no emergency fund, this option is risky.

 

Option 2: Invest Full Rs. 5 Lakh in Mutual Funds
You create long-term wealth from this bonus.

Over 10 years, this can double or more.

You can use this later for a big goal like early retirement.

But mutual funds have risk of loss in short term.

Also, no guaranteed returns.

You need to stay invested long term and stay calm during market ups and downs.

If you have no emergency fund, again, this is not safe.

Emergency Fund Comes First
Before you choose prepayment or SIP, ask this first:

Do you have 6 months’ expenses saved as emergency fund?

Your monthly expenses are about Rs. 1.2 to 1.3 lakh.

So, emergency fund should be at least Rs. 7.5 to 8 lakh.

If you don’t have this yet, you must build it first.

Emergency fund should be kept in liquid mutual fund, FD, or savings account.

This gives peace and security during job loss, health crisis or big expense.

This also allows SIPs and EMIs to continue in hard times.

Use Rs. 1.5 to 2 lakh from the bonus to build emergency fund.

This is your foundation.

Ideal Split of Rs. 5 Lakh Bonus
Instead of putting all in one place, do a balanced split.

This gives you safety, peace, growth and loan savings together.

Here is a good model:

Rs. 2 lakh: Build emergency fund (if not already there)

Rs. 1 lakh: Partial prepayment of education loan (especially if interest is high)

Rs. 2 lakh: Invest in mutual funds for long term

This is a 360-degree plan.

It covers immediate safety, medium-term saving, and long-term growth.

It does not lock everything in the house or in markets.

It also keeps your risk low and returns reasonable.

Extra Suggestions to Strengthen Finances
Continue SIPs at Rs. 20,000 monthly.

Once education loan closes, increase SIP by Rs. 11,000 monthly.

Do not stop SIP even after buying a house.

Review your SIP funds once a year with a Certified Financial Planner.

Choose regular funds through a trusted MFD. Avoid direct funds.

Direct funds do not give guidance. They seem cheap but lead to poor decisions.

MFD with CFP helps in fund selection, discipline and rebalancing.

Invest in growth plans only if you are sure of the holding period.

If you plan to withdraw in less than 3 years, do not invest in equity.

Create goal-based SIPs – one for retirement, one for parents, one for your own freedom.

Review all insurance. Have term insurance and health cover already in place.

Track expenses for three months. Cut non-useful spends and increase savings.

Keep bonus or any windfall money for meaningful goals only.

Never mix consumption (like holidays) with your wealth-building money.

Tax Points to Keep in Mind
You will not pay tax for home loan prepayment.

But mutual fund gains are taxed on sale.

Short-term capital gains (within 1 year) – taxed at 20%.

Long-term capital gains (after 1 year) – first Rs. 1.25 lakh gain is tax-free.

Above that, taxed at 12.5%.

So, hold mutual funds for long term to get benefit.

Do not redeem mutual funds in panic or to pay EMI.

Always sell only after 1 year to reduce tax and maximise growth.

Finally
Rs. 5 lakh bonus is a gift. Use it wisely.

Don’t rush to prepay loan just because it feels good.

Don’t invest all into mutual funds only thinking of high returns.

First, secure your base with an emergency fund.

Next, reduce high-interest loans partially.

Then, invest the rest for long-term wealth creation.

This gives you strong financial health.

You feel secure, flexible and confident.

A Certified Financial Planner can review your full plan yearly.

This gives you the right direction in all seasons of life.

Stay invested, stay protected, and keep growing step by step.

Best Regards,
K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,
Chief Financial Planner,
www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Money
Ramalingam

Ramalingam Kalirajan  |8889 Answers  |Ask -

Mutual Funds, Financial Planning Expert - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 10, 2025
Money
I am an AI engineer and I have recently started my career with a CTC of 11 lakh. I get Rs 79,000 monthly salary in hand after all deductions. I invest 15,000 in an equity SIP. My plan is to buy my first house worth 70 lakh in the next 2 to 3 years for which I will need at least Rs 14 to 15 lakh for the down payment. Should I stop SIPs and save aggressively, or increase my SIPs to build corpus faster?
Ans: You are off to a great start in your career. Earning Rs. 11 lakh CTC with Rs. 79,000 take-home monthly is a good beginning. Investing Rs. 15,000 monthly in equity SIPs from the start shows strong financial discipline.

You have shared a clear goal. You want to buy a house worth Rs. 70 lakh in 2 to 3 years. You aim to save around Rs. 14–15 lakh for the down payment.

Now let us look at your options and decide if you should stop or continue your SIP.

We will explore this from all sides to help you make the best decision.

Understanding Your Current Cash Flow
You take home Rs. 79,000 every month.

You invest Rs. 15,000 in equity mutual funds through SIPs.

So, you are left with Rs. 64,000 per month.

From this, you pay rent, food, travel, and other expenses.

Let's assume your monthly expenses are around Rs. 35,000 to Rs. 45,000.

That means you may have Rs. 15,000 to Rs. 25,000 as surplus every month.

House Purchase Timeline and Need
You want to buy a house in 2 to 3 years.

For a Rs. 70 lakh house, a 20% down payment is around Rs. 14 lakh.

You will also have other costs: registration, interior, moving charges, etc.

So, you need to save Rs. 15–17 lakh safely in 2–3 years.

This is a short-term financial goal.

Short-term goals must not be invested in equity mutual funds.

Equity is risky in the short term. It may give low or even negative returns.

SIPs in equity funds work best only when held for 7 years or more.

So, continuing equity SIP for a short-term goal is not the right strategy.

Should You Stop SIPs Completely?
No, do not stop SIPs completely.

But you should reduce your current SIP amount.

You can temporarily shift focus to building your house down payment fund.

Reduce SIP from Rs. 15,000 to Rs. 5,000 or Rs. 7,500 monthly.

This way, you can continue long-term investing while saving for the house.

How to Build the Rs. 15 Lakh Corpus
Start a separate savings plan for the down payment.

Keep this fund safe in low-risk instruments.

Use a mix of Recurring Deposit (RD), short-duration debt mutual funds, and FDs.

Avoid equity, index funds, gold funds, or hybrid funds for this goal.

SIP is not the best way to save for short-term needs.

Set a clear monthly savings target. Aim for Rs. 35,000 to Rs. 40,000 per month.

This will help you reach Rs. 15 lakh in 36 months or earlier.

Why Not Increase Your SIP to Build Faster?
SIP in equity is meant for long-term goals.

Increasing SIP will only help in long-term wealth creation.

For house down payment in 2–3 years, equity SIP will not help.

The value may drop if the market falls when you need the money.

SIP returns are unpredictable in 2 to 3 years.

Therefore, increasing SIP is not suitable for this specific short-term goal.

Safe Options for Your Down Payment Fund
Use a combination of monthly recurring deposits and debt mutual funds.

Choose debt mutual funds with short maturity duration.

You may invest a part in ultra-short-term or low-duration debt funds.

Keep the rest in a bank recurring deposit or fixed deposit.

These options are safe. They give moderate but steady returns.

Returns are not affected by market swings.

This keeps your down payment money secure and growing steadily.

Always align investment risk to goal timelines.

Tax Rules to Remember (Only If You Sell SIP Units)
You may redeem some SIP investments later.

If held for more than one year, gains up to Rs. 1.25 lakh are tax-free.

After that, Long Term Capital Gain (LTCG) is taxed at 12.5%.

If you sell within one year, Short Term Capital Gain (STCG) is taxed at 20%.

So, avoid redeeming equity SIPs for your house purchase.

It can lead to tax and loss if the market is down.

Advantages of Continuing SIP for Long-Term Goals
You are still young and early in your career.

Keep some SIP running for long-term wealth creation.

Use SIP to build a retirement fund or corpus for other big goals.

SIP in mutual funds builds wealth slowly but surely.

Choose regular mutual fund plans with help from a Certified Financial Planner.

Avoid direct mutual funds. They look cheaper but have no personal advice.

Regular funds through a good MFD and CFP provide guidance and reviews.

You also avoid emotional investing mistakes with expert handholding.

Professional review every year ensures better returns and better discipline.

Extra Points to Consider
Once your home purchase is done, restart your equity SIP aggressively.

If possible, increase your income through side projects or skill upgrades.

Save any bonus or hike money directly into your down payment fund.

Avoid spending on gadgets, vacations, or unnecessary EMI purchases.

Keep a written monthly budget to track savings closely.

Use a separate bank account for your down payment savings.

Avoid linking SIPs or savings to credit cards or UPI apps. This builds discipline.

After buying the house, plan for EMI, interiors, and maintenance costs.

Keep an emergency fund ready even after your house purchase.

Have term insurance and medical insurance in place as your next step.

Final Insights
You are on the right path with your SIP discipline.

But equity SIPs are not meant for short-term goals like house down payment.

So, reduce the SIP. Save more in low-risk instruments for 2 to 3 years.

Keep SIP alive with a smaller amount for long-term goals.

This way, you achieve your house goal safely and continue wealth building.

Meet a Certified Financial Planner to structure the savings plan and monitor progress.

Stay consistent and goal-focused. Avoid switching plans too often.

Building wealth is not about rushing. It is about steady action over time.

Your career is just starting. So build strong financial habits from the beginning.

Every financial choice you make today impacts your future lifestyle.

Be smart, be simple, and be consistent.

This will help you reach your goals with peace and confidence.

Best Regards,

K. Ramalingam, MBA, CFP,

Chief Financial Planner,

www.holisticinvestment.in
https://www.youtube.com/@HolisticInvestment

...Read more

Money
Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |604 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 29, 2025
Relationship
Dear Ms Rai, I am dealing with an increasingly toxic dynamic at work. A junior colleague from a top B-school who has recently been hired repeatedly challenges me in front of my team. Though it's all subtle, it's compromising my authority. I feel increasingly stressed, irritable, and helpless in his presence. I understand he is young and I don't want to retaliate or look insecure, but I'm mentally beginning to wear out. How do I maintain boundaries and self-respect in such situations?
Ans: What you're going through isn’t just about hierarchy; it’s about dignity, mutual respect, and the quiet erosion of psychological safety at work.

When someone subtly undermines you — especially in a professional setting — it can chip away at your confidence and presence in ways that aren’t always easy to name. Your instinct to avoid reacting impulsively or retaliating is wise, but choosing not to react does not mean you must tolerate disrespect or power play.

This dynamic is less about the junior’s credentials and more about a breach of professional decorum. Subtle challenges in meetings, tone policing, or backhanded comments are often masked as confidence or "fresh ideas,” but if the intent or impact is to sideline you or question your authority publicly, it needs addressing — calmly, firmly, and early.

Here’s a way forward. First, document patterns — what’s said, when, in whose presence, and how it impacts the team dynamic. This is not for confrontation, but for clarity and grounding your experience.

Then, create a direct but non-confrontational one-on-one moment. Frame it from a place of collaboration, not accusation. For example, “I’ve noticed a few instances where we seem misaligned in team meetings — I’d like to understand your point of view, and also share how that’s being perceived in the room.” That opens a door rather than slamming one.

At the same time, reinforce your presence in the room — not by competing, but by anchoring in your experience, clarity, and calm authority. Redirect when needed. If the junior interjects or oversteps, acknowledge briefly, and then say, “Let’s circle back to that once I finish.” It’s subtle, professional boundary-setting.

You don’t need to prove your worth — you’ve earned your seat. But you do have the right to protect your space, and even more so, your peace.

...Read more

Relationship
Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |604 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 29, 2025
Relationship
Dear Ms Rai, I'm engaged to a guy my parents introduced me through an arranged marriage set up. Initially, everything seemed fine, but over the last few months, I've noticed that my fiance only discusses physical intimacy, which is making me uncomfortable. I have tried to tell him but I don't feel an emotional connection with him. I am hesitant to express this to my family or his. How should I approach this situation?
Ans: What you're experiencing is more common than it seems, and your discomfort is not just valid — it's important. A marriage, especially one that begins through family arrangements, needs far more than surface compatibility or physical interest. You deserve emotional connection, mutual respect, and a safe space to be heard and known deeply — not just desired physically.

The fact that your fiancé focuses primarily on physical intimacy while you’re still seeking emotional grounding raises a significant concern. It’s not about being shy or conservative — it’s about emotional safety and trust, which are foundational. If you're already feeling a disconnect or pressure now, it’s unlikely things will magically fall into place after marriage.

You’re not obligated to silence your discomfort for the sake of avoiding conflict. Start by being honest with yourself: Is this the kind of connection you want for life? If the answer is uncertain, it’s better to pause than to proceed out of pressure.

You don’t have to go straight to your family or his with everything. Start by writing down how you feel and what you’re afraid of. Then, speak to someone you trust — maybe a sibling, cousin, or a therapist — someone who can help you reflect calmly. If you feel strong enough, you can then have a direct and respectful conversation with your fiancé. Ask him what he expects in this relationship beyond the physical, and express clearly that you’re looking for a deeper bond, not just intimacy.

A marriage can be postponed or even reconsidered, but a life spent in silent emotional disconnect can weigh you down. You are not being unreasonable — you’re being honest and self-aware. That’s the best foundation for any life decision.

...Read more

Relationship
Kanchan

Kanchan Rai  |604 Answers  |Ask -

Relationships Expert, Mind Coach - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - May 28, 2025
Relationship
My elder brother got married of his own choice past 12 years ago regardless the parents decision and lived by himself, he has two sons aged 10 and 5, after a recent scenario between him and his wife, they both are not into good terms since 8 months which is impacting on the kids and their upbringing. My brother is a field relationship manager in a real estate company and earning his bits, struggling with life and work. He has no financial and family support..as a younger brother I listen to all his struggle and troubles and advice him accordingly. All of these things are draining my mental and physical health . I myself struggling as a lawyer having my mom dad and grandmother with their health issues ..I am not able to make a firm decision on the scenario, should my brother and his wife get seperated? If yes please explain.
Ans: Your brother and his wife have been in conflict for eight months, and the tension is harming the children — that’s the most concerning part. You can offer support, but only they can decide whether this marriage still has life in it or if it’s better for everyone — especially the children — to grow in two calmer homes than one violent or unhappy one.

The only responsible way to move forward is to encourage them to seek professional help — through marriage counselling, family therapy, or at least structured mediation. If after that, they still can't communicate or co-parent peacefully, then separation may be the healthiest path, not just for them, but for the kids and for you.

You, on the other hand, need to draw a boundary. Listening doesn’t mean absorbing. Supporting doesn’t mean sacrificing your own well-being. You’re already managing aging parents, your own legal career, and life’s pressures — this is too much to bear alone. Let your brother know lovingly that you care, but he needs to begin taking decisive steps toward either mending or ending this — and get professional input.

...Read more

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Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |2995 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Career
Radheshyam

Radheshyam Zanwar  |2995 Answers  |Ask -

MHT-CET, IIT-JEE, NEET-UG Expert - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 10, 2025
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Dr Nagarajan J S K

Dr Nagarajan J S K   |938 Answers  |Ask -

NEET, Medical, Pharmacy Careers - Answered on Jun 10, 2025

Asked by Anonymous - Jun 10, 2025
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